Open Letters

[rere]

Dear self,

If you are cleaning toilets at 6:30 am, you are doing life wrong.

Signed, working mom.

Dear Dh,

When you are working 12 hours a day, I am pretty much running everything. Including tracking down lost gym bags on busses, making sure everyone gets to practice and games, dinner, homework, picture day, etc.... So when Ds phone goes dead and cannot be fixed, and I replace it quickly, on my lunch (due to high school, out of town games, practice that ends at a variety of times) with a USED phone, I don't need you to second guess if I could have found it cheaper. If you want to take over pretty much everything and still go to work like I do, I'd like to see it.

Signed, Don't mess with me today.

[twinmomma]

Dear spouses of DH's friends,
None of us are bridesmaids. We're planning a bachelorette type celebration for this bride to be nice people, because we are the spouses of all the groomsmen and the real bridesmaids suck at life. I wanted to just go to dinner and grab drinks or something. A simple thing to acknowledge the bride. A whole night of haunted houses at one of those amusement park places is NOT what I had in mind at all. I know the bride likes that stuff, but I HATE it. Like, to the extent that my stomach hurts just thinking about attending and I will likely have some sort of panic attack melt down by the end of the evening. Can I just do dinner with you all and bail before the haunted stuff?
Signed,
Biggest wimp on earth

Dear DH,
Stop telling me that haunted houses are "just theater." It makes me want to stab you. I have to do some calming breaths every time I think about this night out.
Signed,
Anxious wife

[phdmomma]

Dear DH,

I cannot believe that you forgot to get DS at the bus stop yesterday. It is literally across the street from our house, and he is 5. Thank god one of the other dads walked him over. Being on a call is not an excuse, you take your calls on your cell phone. This is just reason a billion and two of why I wanted to sign him up for formalized aftercare in January, but you said no, and all of the spots all filled. I did pick up every single freaking day for the past 5 years, and minus the time that the train I was riding hit a pedestrian and we were stranded on the train, I was able to go to daycare 20 minutes away and pick him up every day. You need to start upping your game here.

Singed,
Your unimpressed wife

[saraml13]

Dear DS1,
Please stop telling the other kids at school, "you look like a penis!".
Signed,
Embarrassed Mommy

Dear Teacher,
I'm sorry I laughed when you told me that DS1 has been telling the other kids they look like penises. That probably wasn't the responsibility we you were looking for.
Signed
Trying to keep it together

[judyblume14]

Dear twinmomma,
I would also bail after dinner because, fcuk that haunted house crap. I don't think you're a wimp.

[2chatter]

Dear House and Cars -
Please stop being money pits. I managed to overdraft our bank account by not paying attention but yeah, a few thousand in extra expenses in a couple week period will do that. Please don't let there be a beehive in the attic.

Moved money, still stressed

[mommyatty]

Dear Son:

Stop pooping your pants. Seriously, dude, you are too big for this.

Pissed Off Mommy Who Is About to Put You Back in Diapers

Dear Daughter:

Your doll gets here today! I'm so proud of you for earning it. You did great! And thank you for keeping up with your jobs even without earning gems/money!

Proud Mommy

[xctsclrx]

twinmomma, I might be chuckling at you just a little, only because I love the haunted houses stuff. However, totally bail after dinner. It shouldn't hurt anyone's feelings if you do. I am sure the bride and friends would rather hang out with you at dinner and then have you bail rather than be miserable the whole time.

Dear DS

Fix your potty issues please!!! Your dad and I are frustrated. Also, your attitude could use an adjustment. You don't get to tell Mommy and Daddy no. You ARE NOT THE BOSS. Daddy wants to start spanking. Yesterday I had so much rage at you that I wanted to and I don't believe in spanking. You are lucky I have self control. You are being a brat. You are cute and I love you, but screaming at me is not okay and will not be tolerated anymore.

Love,

Mommy who still doesn't believe in spanking and is probably driving Daddy nuts with this rule.

Dear Self,

I learn patience. Your child is two. He is supposed to drive you nut. Pushing boundaries and all of that.

Love
me

[twinmomma]

xctsclrx, Trust me. I know people are chuckling at me. Mainly my in laws, who literally used to run professional haunted houses for 30 years. Which is part of why I was going to try to suck it up and attend, but I just messaged my sister in law privately to see if she'd mind me bailing. I know the haunters can smell people like me a mile away and go all out on it, based on my years of experience in my in laws family, which is adding to my layers of stress. I'm insane. lol

[Covergirl82]

twinmomma, solidarity! I would bail after dinner too.

phdmomma, oh hell no! That would give me rage for days.

[erinshelley21]

Dear WP,
We got our pictures back. You've put up with a lot of brain dumps from me lately, so you get a look at the erinshelley's. I'll leave it up for a few hours before I poof
*poof*

Also, sorry it's huge lol

[katrine05]

Dear DH,
Please ignore all the packages that will be showing up on our doorstep the next few days. Me being back to work = more money + less time. Only truly unnecessary item is the new Tula.
Love,
Should maybe start having things shipped to work since I never get home first.

Dear kids,
So glad you are both doing so well with your transitions to school and daycare. Knowing that you are happy makes me happy.
Love,
Mommy

[justcheckingin73]

twinmomma, there is no way I'd go to a haunted house! I did my share in high school and my 20s. Do not need that stress in my life.

erinshelley21, you are adorable and so is your family. Thanks for sharing!

[phdmomma]

Covergirl82, I am still stewing about it. And may have suggested setting an alarm on his phone for when the bus arrives. Part of me wants to save this up as ammunition for when an aftercare spot comes available (we are on a waitlist) and he is still waffling on it.

[traveltheworld]

twinmomma, I too am terrified of haunted houses. I went to one once and saw the "actor" who was going to jump out at us, I begged him not to get any closer to me and started dry heaving. The guy was like "umm....well, it's suppose to be a surprise - that's the terrifying part. But if you already see me, why are you so scared?"

erinshelley21, your photo looks beautiful. You have a beautiful family!

[waverly]

Dear birthday party that was my idea- why did I have this idea? For one thing I invited the whole class, and yes I have some time for RSVPs but I have heard from exactly 2 people. 2! I also texted 4 friends. Two did not respond at all- one we were not close so could have gotten new phone or moved. The other one maybe didn't see it? One texted back they had basketball games and the 4th is coming. This is stressful because I also don't know if parents are coming and have to buy food for them or how many kids. So far I have 4 confirmed kids and we booked the party for 12. What if no one shows up?!  I forgot a 5th friend texted thanks but did not say if they were coming- ugh.

Dear boy scouts- I think I might be regretting you. We have a meeting this weekend, next weekend is rocket launch and the following weekend is a camp out. I have to get out the tent and see if it actually works, buy a uniform, buy sleeping bags (done), and waterproof the tent if it is still functional, strong arm my H into participating since neither of us actually want to go camping. Ugh why does character building have to be hard? I may have answered my own question on that. Girl scounts was NOT every weekend. Oye  Also, why can't I buy the uniform online?  Signed person that hates errands and shopping. 

Now we are doing physical therapy for DS. The in-laws and my mom are all coming to the party. Its overwhelming.

Dear Roomba- I still love you. XOXOX

[Covergirl82]

erinshelley21, aww, beautiful photo and family!

katrine05, I agree and I'm the same way. My DH complains too about "all the packages" we get, but I rarely do I actually go to a store to shop, other than to get groceries. So I figure the shipping fee is worth my time and gas (even though I try to get free shipping as often as possible).

Dear self,

That splurge of spending $15 on lilac-scented body lotion was totally worth it! It's a nice, light scent that has lasted longer than perfume seems to.

Signed,
Floral-scented me

[leap]

phdmomma, last year my H was responsible for getting our 1st grader on and off the bus for about half the year. He set alarms on his phone for both. It's really not a bad idea. If I were you, I might just set one for him.

[186momx]

erinshelley21, beautiful family
twinmomma, I would bail and am also not a fan of anything haunted or even scary. Drives DH crazy as I refuse to watch scary movies.
waverly, I don't know how you do it. Your posts make me stressed just reading them. You must be an awesome mediator.

Dear DD
You need to tell Mrs. J that you don't want to sit next to R and why. I totally get you don't want to and shouldn't have to babysit a fellow classmate and that this seating arrangement is making you very angry and not wanting to go to school. I bet Mrs. J will take your feelings and concerns into context when she rearranges the class again but you have to tell her and not just spew to mommy.
Mommy who is trying to get you to stick up for yourself.

Dear Corp Client
Bring me the stuff I need!!!!
Angry/Stressed Accountant

[supertrooper1]

twinmomma, my bachelorette party ended up including 4 different places and some went to all and some went to one or two. My cousin went to two because she was only 19 and the next places were bars. One friend showed up for only place #3. No one cares who went to what. It was just a fun night. TL;DR, skip out on the haunted house.

186momx, DH has already rearranged his seating in his class 2 or 3 times in 3 weeks trying to find which students work best to each other. I'm sure the teacher wouldn't mind moving your DD.

[twinmomma]

Update: I will attend dinner, then volunteered to be the designated driver as long as I don't have to set foot in any haunted places. haha

[mae0111]

Dear DDs -

I know that the start of school is tough, and I've really been trying to make it as smooth as possible. But OMG stop it with the crazy behavior.

DD1- yes, you have to brush your teeth, shower, and do your homework. If you don't, you will stink and get in trouble with your teacher. Also, stop lying. You're not good at it, and it just gets you in more trouble with me.

DD2- yes, you have to wear shoes. No, you are not having accidents, so stop telling the teachers that you are. And yes, you're going to school. And I miss you too, but you love school.

Love, Mommy

Dear DH -

I know you're busy at work, and that my focus is now the house and kids, but that doesn't mean you get to check out completely. If I speak to you, respond. If I tell you something, remember it. If a kid needs something, and you're right there, GET OFF YOUR PHONE AND HELP THEM. Mmmkay sweetums?? Stop treating me like the hired help and maybe you will get lucky some time this month.

Wifey

[kimberlybb]

erinshelley21 , great picture! You have a beautiful family!

Dear DS,

Start pooping in the potty consistently. You are freaking killing me kid.

Love,

Mommy

Dear DD,

I think it's premature to start planning your Shopkins birthday party for next July but you do you. I will not, however, send out party invitations for at least another nine months no matter how many times you ask.

Sincerely,

Mommy

[supertrooper1]

Dear DH,
I find it very interesting that in 17 years of teaching at the same school, you have never once wanted to go to a football game, even when I asked you to go years ago when they were playing my HS. But now you ask to go to a far away away game because "someone" asked you to go. I hope she is worth it. I'm happy that you already arranged a babysitter since I have OT that night and I think it's great that you're doing something fun on your own. Although I think DS would have fun at the game. But he would get in the way of your plans.
Signed,
Curious wife

[xctsclrx]

supertrooper1, are you okay with this. I can't really tell from the letter. I would not be on board with DH going to an out of town football game with another woman. I would be okay with it if it was a guy. My DH would never go with another woman though. I'd find that suspicious too.

[judyblume14]

WPs,

I just said "shart" in a meeting, instead of "chart." And I giggled. A lot.

Sincerely Immature,
Judy

[2chatter]

@supertrooper - do you know who someone is? You are way more chill than I would be.

[Covergirl82]

Sept 13, 2017 13:20:34 GMT -5 2chatter said:

@supertrooper - do you know who someone is? You are way more chill than I would be.

supertrooper1 ,

+1 to what 2chatter said.

[186momx]

supertrooper1, I wouldn't be okay with this or would be asking 1001 questions before I could maybe okay with it.

Dear Little Sis
Welcome to the real world. Working full time and going to grad school is hard. Working full time and any schooling is hard. You never had to deal with that before so figure it out and can you figure out a way to decompress without venting to everyone in the family.
Big Sis
who worked full time and did college all at the same time so you aren't getting any sympathy from me

[Covergirl82]

supertrooper1, and I would say, if it were me, oh hell no.