Week of Sept 18th

[cherryvalance]

Hello!  How is everyone doing?

I can't believe we're already halfway through September. My maternity leave is going too fast!  

DS started smiling when you look at him and is making a noise close to a laugh--so cute! I also was able to get my haircut and sleep this weekend, so I feel like a real person again.  

[kellikans]

Hi! 10w3d here. I've been really crampy today which worries me. No bleeding though. I have my next ultrasound on Thursday. Then I move over to my OB next week. I have to do prenatal testing next week and not sure if I'm going to go to my OB for it or the high-risk OB my RE wants to refer me to. I just really hope everything looks okay.

I'm really sore around my abscess site. I'm not sure if it's because I was pressing on it to try to get more out of it (it's been draining for 3 weeks) or if it's getting infected again. I need to call the doctor and have him look at it. I just wish it would heal.

[cherryvalance]

FX for your testing! And ouch on the abscess--do they have any idea how long it will take to heal completely?

[kellikans]

cherryvalance I have to go back in tomorrow. I have a feeling I'll need it drained again. Which means more local, which scares me.

[kristind3]

Hello all. I've been MIA for a while. We got news a few weeks back from the MFM that baby has a heart defect. We're still unsure about what is exactly happening, other than it will need open heart surgery to repair. We'll know more when we meet with the cardiologist. It's been a whirlwind of emotions.

I passed the 30 week mark, which is crazy. I finally got around to getting the paperwork from HR to fill out for my leave. We're hoping to have the nursery painted by early next week. I feel like there is so much to do!

[awick14]

((kristind3)) how long until you see the cardiologist?

DD is getting so big. I can't believe she is almost 9 months already.

I haven't been around much lately, we are relocating, finally, to our new city October 15th. We've just been so busy with packing and figuring out all the details of this move. It's almost all over.

[kellikans]

Hugs kristind3. Hopefully you can get some answers from the cardiologist.

[King26]

I feel like there is not enough time in the day! J is sleeping better at night but that just means a e hour stretch followed by several 1.5 hour stretches then daytime naps are sporadic .

We are having some reflux issues which have worried me. After gaining no weight from week 1 to week 2 J gained a full pound in the past 12 days!!!
cherryvalance how long do you have off from work?
kristind3 I'm sorry about the baby's heart defect. When will you know more? For the record, my cousins 1 year old has a heart problem but so far they haven't had to operate and she is doing great. I hope your baby only needs something minor.
kellikans good luck with the appointment

[oneslybookworm]

Hey ladies! G started daycare this week and seems to be doing well with it. It helps with the routine of daily life, that's for sure. Both J and I are back at work and trying to sort out goals and financial planning looking forward. Not sure what we want to do...possibly one of us staying home is a topic that has cropped up a few times. We're open to a lot of different scenarios, it's just a matter of making a decision and executing.

Things are going really well. G is nearly 3 months and life has really started to settle down. He's turning into a happy little baby...lots of smiles and "talking". He was charming the daycare ladies when I picked him up yesterday, smiling at everyone that stopped by to say hello.

Sending you lots of hugs kristind3. Hopefully you get news soon and the procedure can be minor.

Good luck, kellikans!

[cherryvalance]

kristind3, hugs. That sounds scary, but hopefully you'll get good news from the cardiologist!

King26, I'm going back the first week of November, which is nice because we have the state teachers' convention that week and schools are closed for two days. It will be an easy week back.

[mpc]

Hi all, I'm back at work this week. We were shut down all last week due to the hurricane. At home we were without power for 4 days and without water for 2. We had plenty of drinking water but forgot to fill the bathtubs so we could flush. No major damage, just a few small trees knocked over (small as in fruit trees we planted last year). One of the daycare ladies had a tornado go through her front yard. We left a lot of our hurricane shutters in place since it looked like Maria might head this way, but now it seems she'll turn north before coming to florida.

I'm going to have to travel for work next week. It'll be 6 nights away. DD is 5 moths. I need to do it and I want to do it, but I'm still stressing about it. My H is really worried about being able to handle it, which is not helping. I'm worried about pumping enough and being away hurting my supply. (This is not a completely baseless worry - I travelled 3 times while BFing my son and the third trip basically dried me up.) I wish H would just say to me "don't worry, I'll be ok".

[pandora89]

((kristind3 )) lots of hugs, that must be scary. I hope you are able to get answers soon.

kellikans - Hope the soreness goes away soon, don't have advise on the prenatal testing but FX for you.

oneslybookworm - I cant believe G is already 3 months!

My RE's secretary is supposed to call me today to book another ultrasound, will likely be Friday when I am 7w6d. I am also meeting my family doctor to go over the different types of prenatal screenings and decide which one we want to do/get the requisitions for them. H doesn't want to do the panorama test (mostly for a cost factor, its almost $600) but I prefer to do it (and also find out the gender earlier on).

[King26]

mpc, My H is already freaking out about me going back to work and it's 8 weeks away. I need him to tell me he's gonig to be fine with J all day while I'm working but he's really worried about it. I keep telling him it'll be better by the time I go back and hopefully J will be sleeping better and longer. Will he be sleeping longer and better by 3 months???

cherryvalance, Will that be 12 weeks off for you then? I'm trying to think when you had your baby. I'm going back the week of Thanksgiving so it will also be an easy week.

[loira]

Sept 19, 2017 14:45:28 GMT -5 @daylily said:

King26 Maybe not the most reassuring advice right now, but if its hard for him to be home with baby, then its all the more important that he do it. Establishing a solid bond early between dad and baby, where dad is just as capable as mom to attending to the baby's needs will make your life easier, baby's life happier, and probably make your marriage better. I've seen so many of my friends become moms and fall into this trap where they are the only ones who can do it...and then eventually it becomes true and I think moms and babies and dads altogether are worse for it.

And besides you're totally right--he is going to be just fine with J! I think its awesome that he will be home with J during the day, and think about the peace of mind you'll have knowing J is at home with his dad. So great <3

SO. MUCH. THIS.

My mum friends whose partners didn't take parental leave have all been worse off for it, especially in their relationship. Yes, it will be hard. That's partly the point. When our partners realise exactly what goes into taking care of a baby, and when they develop their own ways of parenting, it benefits everyone. Even if one partner continues to stay home, there's a better understanding of that person's role.

I worry that H have fallen into this trap of me being the primary parent because living in another country means he can't do the day-to-day stuff. I'm so glad that he was home with us for her first 8 months. Although I do acknowledge that this isn't always an option for parents, particularly in the US.

[thoseareradishes]

I'm sorry you are still dealing with the abscess kellikans, I hope it is healed up soon.

Hugs kristind3.

Glad you had minimal damage mpc.

King26, I agree with @daylily, make sure he's learning with you how to take care of J. Hopefully J will be sleeping better by 3 months, but he may not be . E is 3 months adjusted and her napping is horrible. I'd read up on sleep routines and infant sleep patterns so that you can start doing things like setting up some good sleep associations so that hopefully he will be a good sleeper, day and night.

[loira]

kristind3, huge hugs to you. I hope you are able to learn more when you see the cardiologist.

[loira]

@daylily, yes, my H used to do all the night wakeups once we switched to formula. I couldn't go to baby groups because everyone was always asking "how is your baby at night?" and the truth was I didn't have a clue because I just slept on through. The real answer did not make me any friends, so I usually just said "she's okay."

[King26]

Oh DH and I split things equally with J. I'm breastfeeding but he gets a 1 oz bottle after every feeding so DH gives him that then puts him to bed. We share changing diapers. In the mornings he takes him.for 2 hours while I sleep since I so the first motn wake up so he can sleep. He's really good with him but I think he is nervous to be in his own with him. I've left several times but onlybfor an hour or.so. He has left me.for 4 or 5 hours but im.ok. I think it's just the idea of doing it on his own.

[kellikans]

I have a fistula. So I'll have to have surgery once I get in to my second trimester to place a seton, then have surgery once the baby is born to remove the fistula. Ugh.

[oneslybookworm]

Totally agree about dad's taking some of the weight. I was a mess after we got G, so Jamie really did the lions share the first few weeks. When we came home, I started taking on more, but I was back at work after 4 weeks leave while DH stayed home for 2 months. It has helped so much.

[cherryvalance]

kellikans, man, I'm sorry

King26, my H is the same. He's wonderful with DS, jumps right in when he gets home, is happy to get up with him at night, but still worries over little things, like changing his clothes. I'm more likely to get right in there and do it quickly, while he's more delicate because he just doesn't have the same one on one time with DS. He'll be fine and the one on one time will be good for him and you son!

I'll be off work for eight or nine weeks total, but DS will be three months old. He was born on 8/2 .

[cactuscookie]

Sept 19, 2017 17:44:28 GMT -5 King26 said:

Oh DH and I split things equally with J. I'm breastfeeding but he gets a 1 oz bottle after every feeding so DH gives him that then puts him to bed. We share changing diapers. In the mornings he takes him.for 2 hours while I sleep since I so the first motn wake up so he can sleep. He's really good with him but I think he is nervous to be in his own with him. I've left several times but onlybfor an hour or.so. He has left me.for 4 or 5 hours but im.ok. I think it's just the idea of doing it on his own.

DH went back to work before I did, and I was nervous to be on my own with H all day. I think it's just the nature of it, it's intimidating until you get used to it. He'll find a routine that works for them soon enough.
Save

[loira]

Two days in a row I've gone to view a day care, only to find that I'd wasted my time and the spots were already taken (and nobody informed me before my tour). I give up. Apparently I'm not meant to get my career back.

[King26]

J has literally been sleeping for 1 hour at a time all day long. He's up for 1.5 to 2 hours then back down for 1. It's been exhausting and I hope that we can get a longer stretch tonight.

[cherryvalance]

loira, how freaking frustrating! Ugh, I'm sorry.


Well, DS went on Zantac yesterday after a particularly rough day of crying, nusing for five minutes, nodding off, crying again 45-60 minutes later. Fingers crossed this helps him.

[konapoppy]

Ugh I am so sorry kellikans. You can't catch a break

[mrsgoontz]

kristind3 I hope you get answers soon. Big hugs.

kellikans that stinks, i'm sorry. It's so nerve-wracking dealing with extra crap while pregnant. I had a lymph node on my collar bone flare up out of nowhere and had to get it biopsied yesterday.

Did I also mention i'm in the hospital for high BP and im going to be induced tomorrow (OMG). Like we don't have enough on our plates. You're awesome and I hope the procedure is no big deal.

loira I'd be pissed! why are they accepting tours if they have no spots? that's ridiculous.

So other than having a baby tomorrow and having an unknown growth on my collarbone that is hopefully not cancerous nothing new on my end. It's crazy how long we have been trying to start a family and now the time is here and I'm freaking out. What am I going to do with a baby??

Also, kudos to all of the amazing dads in this thread.

[oneslybookworm]

Finished quilting two of the quilts I've been working on!! Just need to bind it and then they're done! The turquoise one is for G!!

[thoseareradishes]

I'm sorry kellikans , I hope the surgery is a breeze and you don't have to worry about it again for a while.

Good luck mrsgoontz !!

Hope J is sleeping better for you today King26 .

E had to get blood work today and it was awful. I opted for a heel stick, because she's had that before and been fine, but she flipped the fuck out. We also had to tape a bag to her to catch a pee sample, and luckily she peed but half of it came out of the bag and on to her clothes. So there was pee and blood everywhere, and no where for me to really clean her up. So that was fun.

[janegold]

Good luck mrsgoontz! So exciting!