Post by erinshelley21 on Dec 14, 2017 17:16:50 GMT -5
1. Niece still hasn't apologized for taking the money. When i asked her and her sister they both said no. When MIL brought up the same amount of money being in her jacket from that day her story changed to she found it outside in the driveway. I still don't have an apology or the money back. I've said my piece and I'm dropping it now.
2. Gave Asshole his contract. He said he will not sign a non-compete because he's 62 years old and refuses to lock himself into that at his age not knowing what he is going to do. Understands why we are doing what we are doing but we shouldn't have excluded him from the discussions about it or making the decision. He thinks that since we aren't a large company that we should have let him know before we signed the deal instead of after the fact. Not how that works dude. After going around for 10 minutes i said that's fine you can choose to not sign it and I can choose to not pay you if I want, to which he said "it is the middle of the month and you owe me a check" According to what? There is no contract or anything in writing saying I owe you money or that you even work for me. Then he brought my dad up and I came un-fucking-glued. There was one point I could tell he was getting ready to interrupt me and i cut him off and said "I am not done" with my finger up. He said "you do not tell me to shut up. I will speak whenever I want too" I don't know what to do now. My brother sat in his office the entire time not saying a word. He doesn't think the contract is necessary so I don't know if that's why. I also didn't anticipate a blow out like that. I figured it would be tomorrow. I went ahead and paid him this month to buy me some time to decide if I want to dig my heals in or wave the white flag and just coast until it's time for me to find a job.
All my updates are medical ones... exciting life I live!
DD was cleared to start weaning off her last anticonvulsant. In 2 months, she'll be drug free. It's very exciting. She's spent more of her life on medication than off, so this is a big step.
We had DS's audiology appointment yesterday. They confirmed that his eardrums are fine and that he hears normal speaking voices. And then he decided he was done cooperating and the other test they wanted to try that would have been more appropriate for his age, but the equipment was damaged by another child the night before (and we were the first appointment of the day and not rescheduled). She ruled out any major problems but wants to confirm low and high pitched sounds, so we go back the end of January.
I mentioned this in another thread, but my dad's wife put him in a nursing home. I totally understand why. I am not in the least upset with her. I am grateful she took such good care of him for so long. I know this whole thing has not been easy for her. I am just sad that she told my uncle and didn't tell me. I'm not upset or mad because I am sure she had her reasons, it just makes me a little sad to think she had to make that decision and felt like she didn't have my support or couldn't discuss it with me. I'm so sad she feels alone, I guess. Or something. I hope I can see him sometime this weekend or next week. Poor daddy. Altzheimers sucks.
My huge project is over. My regular monthly work is mostly done. I am going to get to go to the Christmas lunch party. I reviewed the big project with my VP today, and he was very supportive. At one point he thanked me for turning the revision around so quickly and said he was sure it has been a hectic few days. I reminded him there are 24 hours in a day. Then on one slide he said, "OK good, this is perfect. I was hoping you would have a slide exactly like this." So that felt good.
I received settlement paperwork from my old company because the DOL found that they were underpaying women. I spoke to a class action attorney, and she thinks I should just take the offer and not fight. She said that due to the statute of limitations, we can't even use the DOL's audit. Also, no one I know that received a settlement offer wants to pursue.
It's about 10% of my salary as if my departure. Better than nothing, I suppose. It's annoying because they are making a TON of money on a platform aimed at equality for women in executive boards, but behind the curtain, they're underpaying us and driving us out. A ton of female VP and SVP are leaving, being replaced by men.
So I can't start a class action, but maybe I will just be noisy and annoying until someone listens.
Post by erinshelley21 on Dec 14, 2017 21:03:45 GMT -5
Update to #1. SIL brought niece over to apologize and give the money back. She still tried to lie about finding it outside but after asking her 4 times she finally said she found it on the floor in the kitchen. While I'm glad this has been resolved finally, 10 days feels a little too long.
erinshelley21 I know it must be exhausting to deal with this guy, but if you have any energy to dig in your heels, do it. And I’m glad you got the money/apology.
mae0111 bummer about the class action not happening. I was hoping you’d be riding a wave of righteousness to a bigger settlement and some public shaming of your company.
My 5yo continues to eat crackers for her K teacher. Yesterday’s behavior chart gave DD two sad faces: one for leaving the rug during circle time. She said she had something in her eye but kids aren’t supposed to talk during circle time so she couldn’t tell the teacher why she had to get up. Second one is for saying unkind words to her bestie. DD says they were playing a game, she doesn’t know why the teacher thought she was being mean, and her bestie didn’t get in trouble. The girls were playing happily together at pickup.
Probably worth another thread but I’m so over this lady. DD has three different teachers each day; this is the only one who has a problem with her and of course it’s her official K teacher. 6 more days till break.
No real updates. I had my end of the semester parties for my classes. The juniors and seniors had a potluck. Apparently Oreo balls, chocolate pretzels, 5 different cookies, a cake, 3 pies, and buffalo dip is a potluck for teenagers. Crazy kids.
Post by covergirl82 on Dec 15, 2017 8:11:05 GMT -5
My dad told me this morning that my aunt's cancer treatment is not working. Apparently there is no other treatment option as the cancer she has doesn't respond to chemo. I feel so bad for my dad and my aunt, although I'm trying to hold out hope for a miracle. My dad's family usually gets together on New Year's Eve afternoon, so we will hopefully see her then (as long as she's feeling up to it).
Did I tell you guys my kid asked Santa to fix our outdoor electrical sockets so that we can have decorations like the other houses in our neighborhood? So I have an electrician showing up this afternoon to do that because I don't want to kill the magic of Christmas. She asked for that and a Santa Claus Christmas ornament.
k3am, so happy for your good medical news! I'm sorry you don't have a definitive answer on your DS's hearing; I've been there! We didn't get a good, complete audiology evaluation for my son until he was 3.5, so frustrating. He just would only cooperate so far; it did NOT help that every single eval had to be scheduled in a way that completely messed up his nap, you know?
k3am, Awesome news, hearing evaluations are hard when they are little. DD had just turned 2 when she had hers done.....which was interesting.
twinmomma, That is adorable, Christmas lights seem to be a big deal to my kids this year. DH pulled out the light up reindeer last night, and both of them are dead (some drunk college student kicked them in last year and we bent them back into shape). The kids are super sad, so to home depot we go.
Things are okay here. I have two graduate student defenses today, one which is during our faculty holiday party, which is sad. But I will survive.
Post by erinshelley21 on Dec 15, 2017 9:29:19 GMT -5
covergirl82, I am so sorry about your aunt. k3am, your kids medical issues have been ruling your life for a while so your positive updates are exciting! akafred, I'm sorry about your dad having to go into a nursing home. Maybe you and his wife can have a brief conversation about how you will help when and if you can so she knows she isn't alone. If that's something you want.
shakinros, I think I want to fight him on it, but I highly doubt my brother will find it that important. At the end of the day, it's his livelihood that that would be mostly in jeopardy, it would just be my buyout that would be affected. Today I will be addressing the fact that it was a low freaking blow bringing my dad into a business conversation in such a personal manner. He said "I don't believe who I'm talking too. I can't believe *dad's name*'s daughter would try to screw me over like this." That will be the moment that stands out when I think about the 5 years that he's worked for me. Something similar happened with my aunt when her and I were fighting about things and she said "you are NOTHING like your dad" and it about broke me. Not that I want to be exactly like my dad, but because I respected him and admired him and his confidence in himself.
phdmomma, I'm pretty excited about it! DH and I bought a couple small inflatables and we're going to set those up and string up lights on Christmas Eve after the girls are in bed. They're going to freak when they wake up the next morning!
erinshelley21, Remind me why you can't just fire him? I mean, really. Couldn't you just say that he's crossed all lines and is no longer acting in a professional manner. Time to show him the door!
Post by erinshelley21 on Dec 15, 2017 10:32:52 GMT -5
twinmomma, business-wise it would make the transition for our clients that he handles smoother if he stayed to help renew them. If we didn't have him here we would be telling them all at the same time that their agent is gone so they have a new one and we've merged with another agency. The idea is that he and my brother go together to inform his clients so that he can assure them that they will be in good hands. We are just trying to not rock the boat too much since there's been a lot of boat rocking since 2010. 2011 is the first crop year after my dad died. 2012 the agency we were buying tried to sell what we were buying out from under us by acting as us. 2013 the OTHER asshole agent that eventually sued us left. We've been back on steady ground and proven ourselves to our clients again. Some of the ones that stayed when the other guy left only stayed because they weren't getting taken care of by him and basically gave us a chance.
I just said to him what I needed to say and I've decided to stop engaging. He keeps making it personal, trying to tell me I took on too much when my dad died, and that I am disrespectful. I let him know that I find it rather RESPECTFUL to not require any sales quotas out of someone of his age or a set number of hours (he works about 5 per day) and to take money from my own pocket to make sure he can continue to have a job since someone at his age would struggle to find one that pays as well. I told him a 30 or 40 year old would have been out the door 3 years ago.