Talk to me about third babies...

[mamaalysson]

For the last few months I’ve had this nagging feeling that we should have another baby. I’ve timidly mentioned it to DH, who would be all for it. He wanted like 7 kids, so 3 would be no problem. But a part of me also thinks I’m crazy. I know only he and I can make the right choice for us, but I’m going nuts. Help me talk this out?!

- I’m 37 and would be 38 when another baby was born.
- I didn’t love being pregnant when I was 29 and 32, though my second pregnancy was definitely better than my first.
- Our kids are 7.5 and 4.5, and we are definitely out of any baby stage with them.
- DS starts kindergarten next year...do I really want to go back to a baby just as I’m about to get freedom?
- Our house is way too small for a third child. I mean, the baby would bed/room share for a while anyway, but we’d have to bump up our new house plans.
- DH comes from a big family, and, as nutty as they can be, I really like the dynamic of having a (small) handful of siblings. Especially as we’ve been going through his dad’s illness, having multiple siblings to share the stress and experience with is invaluable.
- I just can’t ignore this feeling that we’re not done with babies...

Help!

[gastro]

Do it!

We are going for a third this year. I’m turning 37 in a few days and DS1 will be 7 soon.

The only reason I’m doing it is because I want a third. Everything else about having a third doesn’t really make sense.

I do think if it takes multiple cycles or miscarriage we will end the process quickly. I’m going to give myself this calendar year to get pregnant. If it doesn’t happen by then I think we will move on.

[nicolewi]

That nagging feeling is how we had a fourth. I had my third just before turning 38 and my fourth just before turning 40.

Seriously, if you have that feeling, GO FOR IT! I am one of three and I still enjoy having more than one sibling to talk to/bounce ideas off of/vacation with/spend holidays with. With my kids, it's been fun to watch their sibling relationships develop over time. At those ages, your big kids can really be helpers and I bet they'd love a little brother/sister.

[cabbagecabbage]

I have absolutely no nagging feeling I need a third. I think that’s the difference. I am so done at two and I am about to turn 37 myself and cool with calling it a day. If you aren’t done, give it some more thought then go for it. All the third babies I know are angelic sweethearts.

[chatterbox]

I’ve suddenly been having the same nagging feeling! I’m the same age as you with a 3 and almost 2 year old. I hate being pregnant and the new born stage. Plus the added expense. I’m really trying to talk myself out of it because it’s so crazy, especially since DH and I just had a rough six months that we are finally coming out of. DH and I talked about it yesterday and we just don’t feel like our family is complete yet. It’s completely impractical though and we are both very practical people.

[penguingrrl]

I will say that I love the dynamic of a big family! My kids have very different relationships with each other and it’s so cool watching them develop as they grow up!

That said, now that I’m 2+ years out of diapers and strollers and babies there is no way in hell I’d go back lol! Drew starts K in the fall and I feel freer every day because of his growing independence!

[bookchick]

I'd go for it!

My oldest is 20, and my other is 8. LOL! She was a sweet surprise, after a few hard years of trying with some heartbreak. I actually had the bug for a minute...but I am 38, and with all the difficulty previously, I have decided against it. Babies are awesome!

[trizzie]

Go for it! I was 37 when I had our 3rd. She was the best decision we ever made!!!