mae0111 - I’m masked and gloved with her. 100 percent disposable everything - travel mugs for hot tea, cutlery, cups, bowls, plates, probe covers for the thermometer then Lysol on it. She has her own trash bag in her room that goes straight outside when full, is confined to her room and bathroom and the other kids are prohibited from upstairs except bedtime in their rooms. All throw blankets in all rooms have been washed and couch pillows have been dried on hot. I’m....neurotic. My poor kids. No sick snuggles.
HeartofCheese - how did you guys get to a lawyer for the kids so quickly? I’ve only seen that in collaborative cases or where there’s CPS concern and a GAL. Did I miss how things are? I hope you are ok and deep breaths you will be fine in the meeting! Worst case they see parents cry all day long. And I don’t know why this works, but a guy once told me that to control himself he did math problems and baseball stats. So now, if I am about to cry I try to think about baseball and it works, as it amuses me to think of that guy trying to hold himself back with baseball. It’s apparently a common guy thing? Is there anything guaranteed to make you chuckle internally? Think of that - trick your brain!
And — FWIW - you can celebrate any day on any day. So don’t get too hung up on holidays - look for a good distribution of time (for me the bigger thing has been the fewest transitions). For instance, Easter eggs can be hidden any day! We did more of this before DS, but have sometimes had to after. DD and DH share a birthday, so sometimes we celebrate DH on the day then again with DD so they get to celebrate together.
Post by covergirl82 on Jan 22, 2018 11:22:15 GMT -5
Hugs mae0111 and HeartofCheese. We are always here for you! (And I would totally do talking points, HeartofCheese. I've done the same thing for difficult conversations so I didn't forget anything.)
Weekend was pretty good, but busy. DH and DS went to the high school basketball game on Friday night. They let the younger kids try and make a free throw; if they made the basket, they got a t-shirt. DS and all his friends (who are also on a basketball team) tried and DS was the only one who made the basket!
Another celebration: we are getting most of our main floor painted this week. I'm so excited! We've been in our house 6.5 years and I was finally able to pick a main color and an accent color I liked that DH would agree to. (The main color is Benjamin Moore's Quiet Moments. I have to look at the name of the accent color again, but it's a dark blue.)
2chatter, I've always heard thinking of baseball is how guys keep from having PE issues (esp when first becoming sexually active). So inwould turn crying into laughing.
mae0111, I am so sorry. We are here for you. You can get through whatever comes next.
Post by HeartofCheese on Jan 22, 2018 12:15:16 GMT -5
xctsclrx, 2chatter: my attorney prepped me for it but she made me so anxious about it. I'm not sure she could have painted a clearer picture that I am not viewed as a credible person, just a biased one. And it makes me feel like anything I want to say that's sincere, will end up sounding terrible. But we were assigned one at the first court appearance. I believe it's standard practice where custody is an issue. And, no, the SXH did not agree to my 5/9 split which was really stupid of him (in my opinion anyway...).
sandandsea I’m sorry you have to burn your house down. That would be the only option for me. I used to live near the water so the giant wharf rats were common. I knew that. But when I actually saw one scurrying toward my basement door, I moved. I literally made the decision on the spot, packed my stuff, rented out my condo, and moved.
You sound much more reasonable than me... hope the guy got that bugger out of your attic.
Haha. I have not seen the rat and I only hear it. Knowing the attic is sealed from the rest of my houses makes it better for me.
sandandsea, we had a mouse (or maybe a baby rat, not sure) when we first moved in. And it was while DH was traveling, so I was left to deal with it. I set out glue traps everywhere, never caught anything. But also never saw it or signs of it again. But for months I was terrified I'd find it.
That’s exactly why this has been outsourced. Dh works all the time and I’m not dealing with this. I would have liked to have fired the guy for being so annoyingly late and messing up family dinner plans but I need him to take care of it.
HeartofCheese did your lawyer have advice about the bias thing? Did the lawyer mean that in a - the story you are telling is a story, so you will have a hard time selling it or a they take everything with a grain of salt way? Either way, commit to your strategy and pause when you need to pause. You can do this!!! KUP
Welp, we're waiting on results of his chest xray. He definitely has either bronciolitis or pneumonia. Poor little guy. I feel awful that we didn't take him in on Saturday when I first noticed it. I had wanted to, but let his good spirits and DH convince me I was being a worry wart.
1. I'm at a loss as to what to do with my kids' sleep schedules. If we let them nap, they stay up till 9:30/10:00, but if we don't, they get so tired. Last week was the first week where we didn't let either child nap, and they both slept 12 hours of Saturday night, but were still so tired on Sunday that they both took another 2.5 hour nap.
2. I, for whatever reason, got all emotional about wanting a third child. DH is adamant that we do not have a third, and I know he is right. We don't have the time nor energy to handle a third. And DS had so many health issues earlier on in his life that we feel like we lucked out with DD, so DH is absolutely correct in that we shouldn't "roll the dice" again. BUT...I want a third. I don't know how much of that is being colored by the fact that I suddenly realized that both kids are growing up so fast. I LOVE the pre-school age.
Moms with older kids - tell me that it's great to have older children?!?!
3. Suddenly I'm all obsessed with the fact that DS hasn't been invited to a single birthday party this year. He has play dates with a few kids from his class, and DH says that he seems reasonably popular at school (through observing him during pick-up/drop-off), so why hasn't he been invited?? Our school district cut-off is December 31, so presumably 1/4 of the kids had birthdays after September??
4. This weekend was the first weekend in months that we didn't have to spend putting together furniture, unpacking, etc., and I felt lonely. We moved here 8 months ago and I've not made any inroads in making friends.
Welp, we're waiting on results of his chest xray. He definitely has either bronciolitis or pneumonia. Poor little guy. I feel awful that we didn't take him in on Saturday when I first noticed it. I had wanted to, but let his good spirits and DH convince me I was being a worry wart.
Yeek, sorry to hear that. It's tough when the little ones get sick
HeartofCheese, you too. It sounds incredible stressful, but you CAN handle this.
We had a huge weekend. I spent 2 hours - YES 2 HOURS - at a karate ceremony that should have been 1 hour. On the upside, DS was an angel and behaved wonderfully.
Immediately after that we went to see the school we've been thinking about sending him to. It was really great and I went ahead and filled out an application. I'm still totally stressed that I may be making the wrong decision but I really liked the school and DS did also. Also the teachers all really seemed to love him - and we met every one of them.
Then Saturday night at 2:30 am I got a phone call from my mom that my dad had been taken by ambulance to the hospital and could I drive her up there. He apparently was very dizzy and disoriented. Anyway, they gave him vertigo medicine and he was fine. They couldn't find any other problems with him and they released him later that day, which was another trip to the hospital and then taking him home. Times like these I really wish he still lived 15 minutes away.
I started taking down the Christmas tree and only got half way through. Womp womp.
Welp, we're waiting on results of his chest xray. He definitely has either bronciolitis or pneumonia. Poor little guy. I feel awful that we didn't take him in on Saturday when I first noticed it. I had wanted to, but let his good spirits and DH convince me I was being a worry wart.
Poor guy. . Hope he’s on the mend soon. And I guess bronchitis vs pneumonia though both are awful.
Post by justcheckingin73 on Jan 22, 2018 13:33:28 GMT -5
k3am, I went through something similar when DD was about 18 months. She looked like she was trying too hard to breathe - you could see her ribs when she breathed. I called the on call nurse (who seemed annoyed that I called but that’s another story) who told me to give her meds and watch her but I was so scared that if I put her down for the night, she wouldn’t wake up. I took her to the ER (it was Sunday so nothing else was open) and they diagnosed pneumonia and gave her a breathing treatment and I believe an inhaler to take home. I would think you’d at least get an inhaler but hopefully he gets better soon. It’s so scary when they have labored breathing.
supertrooper1, you wouldn't believe how many people who make really good money live paycheck to paycheck. I see it here all the time. Family of 4 making 30K doesn't bat an eye at our bill and pays us without a complaint. Professor making 100K+ whines that our bill went up 5 bucks and can't pick up until the next payday as they are broke. I baffles me constantly.
My new dishwasher is installed and works! We had to get some help from the neighbor as the 1988 dishwasher connections didn't mesh with the 2017 connections. Good thing my neighbor is a contractor and DH and him get along well.
DD had her 1st none relative sleepover. Other than only sleeping 7 hours or so she did great. Ate the mom out of house and home and was her mini adult as she tried to micromanage everything. Its a new thing...partially my fault as I've been really particular about time and what she needs to do since the 1st of the year and all the schedule changes and she has picked up on it.
k3am & 2chatter Hope your kids are feeling better and everyone else stays healthy!
Vent 1 - my immune system sucks. I have a lovely cold, and neither of my kids currently has one! Not sure where I got this one from.
Vent 2 - our insurance company is pissing us off. DH backed into someone's car in a parking lot Dec 31st with his truck. Other car needs a new bumper, not a scratch on our truck. Since we left for Mexico on the 2nd, he didn't file the claim until the 10th. They still haven't contacted the lady to get things going even though he was told over a week ago that they had everything they needed from him and would contact her. She keeps texting DH to see what's going on. Not our problem anymore!
Celebration - DD and I went to a birthday party for a friend from school yesterday. The kids were skating and DD did so good even though it was only her second time ever on ice skates. I met lots of other parents which was great. So many of them mentioned how much their kid loves DD and they always hear about her (DD is in K and the other girls were all in 1st grade) It was nice to put names to faces and chit chat a bit at drop off this morning.
supertrooper1 , you wouldn't believe how many people who make really good money live paycheck to paycheck. I see it here all the time. Family of 4 making 30K doesn't bat an eye at our bill and pays us without a complaint. Professor making 100K+ whines that our bill went up 5 bucks and can't pick up until the next payday as they are broke. I baffles me constantly.
This is us. Combined we make just over $100k. But we live paycheck to paycheck. Our student loans are more than our mortgage/taxes/insurance every month, and up until this year, daycare has been that same amount too. But buying a house was a smarter financial decision compared to rent around here, which is completely astronomical for really terrible options and at the time we bought, we weren't planning on kids right away. Add in an unplanned pregnancy that resulted in twins, and our finances went to shit very quickly. We're finally in a position to save a little each month, but we don't have any kind of nest egg for emergencies.
We just got our information on our bonus payout and I am so, so pleased!! Holy crap. We can definitely get hardwood floors now.
Also, I had my review this morning and it was very good. I’m “on target”, but that’s normal for my salary range. All the comments were helpful, even the constructive feedback.
Vent: Still don’t feel great post-strep. And at my review, my boss did show again he has no idea what I do. Like I’m testifying at two trials and he’d managed to forget about both of them. Wtf, dude?? Pretty big deal when your employee is testifying on behalf of our Fortune 200 sized company.
Bonus: To whoever recommended 10% Happier: that book has profoundly changed my life. Thank you! Like last night when I was stressing over my review, I remembered his saying that freaking out about the future assigns a fictional course of events that forecloses in your mind any other future, even one that is much better for you. And I calmed the F down immediately. So again, thank you! (Was it twinmomma?)
Update: DH apologized, unprompted. He knows this was a major f-up. He asked me if I was done. I said I didn’t know. We really haven’t talked - scheduling conflicts caused a text interaction (he kept trying to talk to me and I was on a con call trying to drum up some consulting work). But there’s not much to say. I told him if he did it again I would leave. He did it again. Things are more complicated now, and it’s not as easy to walk away. I’m still giving it some serious thought.
It was me mommyatty ! I'm so glad you like it! Did you read it or listen to the audio book? I loved the audio book version. I can totally see it becoming a "go to" for me to listen to over and over.
It was me mommyatty ! I'm so glad you like it! Did you read it or listen to the audio book? I loved the audio book version. I can totally see it becoming a "go to" for me to listen to over and over.
I bought the Kindle version of this last night based on both of your recommendations. I just started reading a few pages but I like it already. Can’t wait to read some more tonight!
I need a Tuesday feel sorry for myself and family post: my SFIL is the hospital again. He went in on Saturday with a collapsed lung. Now he as a leak in his lung and if it doesn't clear up by end of the day he will have to have surgery again. He also has a contagious colon infection, but the meds to treat cause internal bleeding. SFIL is 78 and has been in and out of the hospital since May. I am so scared that this might be it. My son LOVES him. When we visit he follows him around like a puppy dog. Only grandparent he does this with. I wanted DS to have memories of him and now I am afraid that is never going to happen. My husband is stressed, and I think SFIL has given up. He is depressed.
xctsclrx - I am so sorry. I hope they figure it out and he pulls through. With my Dad the key was making the hospitalist Run point to coordinate with the other docs and getting a second opinion. Do you know if he has a service like Second MD tied to his benefits? My Dad’s oncologist, PCP and cardiologist tuned in way more when he pulled in a second opinion, then were way more engaged with each other.
I put DH in charge of making a dentist appointment and taking DS1. DH schedules it for 8:00 am this morning and put it on both our calendars. Which I realized when I pulled into work at 7:55 after dropping both boys at daycare and saw the reminder on my phone.
2chatter, IDK they live 3 hours away and I am letting DH do all the traveling so I can keep my germmy 3 year old away from him. No need to add on daycare germs if I don't have too. DH and I are fixers and honestly there is not much we can do to fix this.