Self care 4/16

[cam]

How are things going?

Challenge: Spend a bit of time on a hobby or other activity you enjoy, or at least make plans to do so soon (i.e. buy the supplies for a project, reserve the book from the library, schedule a tee time with a friend, etc - lol to that last idea where I live because our snow *might* be gone by June at this rate).

[cam]

I have been sick with I don't know what for several days now. I napped briefly on Saturday. LO has been super sweet, asking if there is anything he can do for me. I asked for a beverage refill, and he came back with six "just in case."

[funchicken]

Well, we had a less busy weekend, so DH and I got to spend some time hanging out on the couch and talking (when the kids weren't using the cushions as a fort).

Overall things are going pretty well. DD1 started Zoloft last fall, so this is the first soccer season we've done with her on it, and things seem a lot better. She's getting herself ready for practice without my help (except for shoe-tying because she doesn't feel like she gets them tight enough), and she's been wearing her hair pulled back without complaints. DD being less stressed means less stress for everyone else in the house.

[lemonberry]

We avoided a natural disaster (flooding) and had a family day on Sunday. It was nice and likely the last thing we do together before the baby. I got a lot of cleaning done and still need to finish a few things left on my list.

[auntie]

It has been a really rough couple of weeks.

My dad, who went to memory care assisted living in late January died on April 5th. He had a mixed dementia dx and while we knew this would be fatal, the end came more quickly than we had expected. He seemed to have taken a turn for the worst around the first and the doctors were working to find out why. I visited him at lunch with Chik-Fil-A and a shake that day. He was working with an SLP who was doing a swallow study and was happy to have take out to work with. We had a nice visit between bites and sips of different textures and then he went to take a nap while I spoke with the SLP about next steps. Then I talked with the DON about an additional nurse to advise around palliative care as well as an x-ray and bloodwork he'd ordered for dad. I left around 2, stopped by my mother's to share what we'd talked about and then went for an early bite with DH. At 11 I got the call that he was "unresponsive" and to come to the nursing home quickly.

We jus finished the funeral- with all of the crazy family stuff- Monday. My dad's brother is consumed with guilt because he didn't visit much. My mother's force of nature older-sister flew from Miami to Boston to collect her funeral clothes and mink and then trained to Trenton where I went to collect her- she was on the quiet car and didn't realize she was supposed to get off so a conductor had to go find her. Then she spent the time indulging in her crazy political debates. She's 83 and I'm starting to wonder if she needs to be screened.

Many many more people turned up at the funeral than I would have guessed and then to the luncheon including my idiot ex-BIL. There wasn't room at the inn (we had a private dining room), so to speak, so DS and DH made room by eating at the bar; after DS bounced a woman came in and started hitting on poor DH when my niece's SO rescued him. I can't believe my mother ended up buying lunch for BIL while DH and DS got stuck footing their own tab. Petty, to be sure, but irksome. Dad wanted burial at the National Cemetery here and getting that arranged took over a week which was really a tough limbo to get through.

Later today I have to start a eulogy for my aunt's memorial service next month. She died back in January but can't be buried until things thaw out in Maine. So more quality time with crazy auntie but on her own turf which should be easier.

It's been a little over 2 years in dealing with the acute phase of dad's disease and all of the logistical challenges. Now it's time to help my mother put together the rest of her life and get back to mine.

My self care is a rescheduled hair appointment today and a gossipy bio DH bought me.

[sahara78]

I’m so sorry for your loss, auntie.

[funchicken]

I'm so sorry, auntie,

[lemonberry]

I'm so sorry, auntie.

[cam]

auntie, sorry for your loss.