mustardseed2007 - FWIW DS (had turned 5 in February) made crazy huge strides last year April and May. All of a sudden he was finishing very long work. I don’t think it’s something you can control and I don’t think it’s entirely age based. They have to be ready, in the right environment. At the time, he was trying to impress a 7yo in his class and keep up with him. I should note that I generally don’t buy into the maturity thing unless egregious and disruptive (and that I was a court case to start at 4 so this has kind of been part of the oral history of my life).
Is the absolute worst case that he repeats first grade? I’d call that a long shot considering he’s coming from Montessori and IME that means he is ahead of public school levels in everything. Have you compared the Montessori shelf to the K curriculum at the public school? That might give you some peace of mind.
Post by mustardseed2007 on May 2, 2018 14:12:46 GMT -5
The school he's going to is private. I mean...after visiting them and talking to the first grade teacher, I'm pretty sure he'll go in behind in some areas and maybe even ahead in some areas. Just because it's a whole different way of teacher with a whole different emphasis.
mustardseed2007, Personally I would send him to 1st, and the worst case scenario is that he repeats it then. But kids can make huge strides in things when they are in the right environment. In our district they don't hold kids back unless it is something like absences, they do tutoring and extra help to catch them up. Our state actually doesn't require kindergarten (although its free through the district and my son is in it now), so first grade will be very much a mixed bag.
Post by mustardseed2007 on May 2, 2018 15:02:10 GMT -5
It'll be his first time ever in a single age classroom. I talked to the 1st grade teacher specifically about the fact that I expect him to be behind and he's got a tutor etc. etc. She said it's common for kids who come outside their school to be behind because different schools have different expectations etc.
Yeah it's hard for me to take what the current schools says into consideration because it has seemed like such a poor fit for him (hence why you are moving him) and he might really excel at the new school. Personally I wouldn't hold him back. I am a bit biased though because I was the youngest in my class.
I think the no iPad thing is a good punishment. Yeah, it’s not age inappropriate, but he does need to understand this is a big deal and he needs to keep his clothes on.
As far as holding him back, with a December birthday, I wouldn’t. I just can’t contemplate a kid not graduating high school until 19 without extraordinarily good reason. There are MULTIPLE kids in DD’s class who are turning 7 in kindergarten while DD won’t turn 6 until the summer. Mostly I don’t feel feel like they are advantaged by the fact that they are so much older. In fact, I feel like in life they are a year behind already. And frankly a couple are borderline bullies just because they are much bigger than many of the other kids. Also, because sports here are by age and not grade, it means that some kids can’t play with the others in some sports because they are too old. (I think because of the red shirting phenomenon.)
I don't think you should hold him back either. What will happen when they celebrate his birthday and he is turning 7 while the entire K class is 5 or 6? For me that would make me feel horrible that everyone knew I was so much older. If the new school 1st grade teacher doesn't have any worries than I wouldn't worry either. As far as maturity having everyone in class the same age should make him act more mature because he isn't going to want to be called the baby. If he is in a class full of 3-5 year olds and he is 6 I would expect he acts like a 4 year old because he can get away with it. Juts my opinion.
DD's 1st grade class is all over the place at the start and the ones behind have done a great job catching up. Different teachers present things differently which can make things click.
Post by librarychica on May 3, 2018 20:52:55 GMT -5
Add me to the wouldn’t hold back crowd. My oldest is in a Montessori room, is a December birthday, is BFF’s with the 4/5yos and on the immature side, IMO. No one has suggested she repeat K. I can’t see her doing K again. She’s an average student but would be bored in another year of K for sure, which I’m sure would lead to acting up or, more likely for her, zoning out completely. We are also moving to a traditional classroom next year — we will have to compare notes .
Since he is mostly on track academically I’d worry he would be bored. I’d definitely put him with his peer group. I wouldn’t be surprised if he rises to the occasion socially.
Post by mustardseed2007 on May 4, 2018 6:58:37 GMT -5
I actually casually raised the idea of repeating K with him and I could tell the idea bothered him although he said he would do whatever.
I've told DH I didn't think we shouldn't do it but we haven't fully had a conversation yet. Anyone else feel like you never have time to have in depth conversations with your spouse? Gosh.
Fun facts updating to my original issue: Several days later and after talking to his regular teacher DS now says "I am responsible for myself...but E still lied." And DS stayed away from E until yesterday (by choice) and then played with him today. I asked him today if he and E talked about it and he said "no, we don't need to." And I told him if he did feel like he needed to in the future he could, and he told me "I would feel anxious to do that." There's a lot there but honestly I feel like that's maturity isn't it?
Also, DS is on day 4 of no electronics and SHOCK he has not died. And in fact, life is better around here. So. Ha ha DH.