Potty Training Woes

[jr009j]

Hi all- I'm wondering if anyone has any advice for potty training an almost 4 year old girl.  Though she has no official diagnosis, she's a sensory seeker, with a lot of body positioning issues.  She was a delayed walker (walking at almost 2). We have seen her pediatrician, a GI doctor, and a urologist to rule out any medical issues. Her OT and PT have no ideas on how to help.  And a professional potty trainer rejected her because she hasn't had success with kids with special needs. 

It seems to me that she doesn't know how to release her urine, as she'll sit for an hour on the potty and do nothing. And she can't tell us before she pees or even while she's peeing, its always after when she's wet. She typically holds it all day until she can't hold anymore and it basically explodes out of her.   We've tried all the tricks to get her to release (running water, blowing bubbles, glitter jar, dripping water over her genitals...) with no results.  This has been a problem for at least a year (since we first attempted to potty train her), but I think it started earlier.


We've started and stopped to see if maturity would help.  She wants to wear underwear and to stay dry, but can't figure it out. No special food or toy has helped yet.  Asking her to sit on the potty hourly just results in a battle of wills and she's stubborn.  If you tell her she can't do something until she's potty trained, she's okay with it because she just wants to stay home any how.  Preschool is willing to work with her because they've known her her entire life, so I don't have a huge time crunch, but kids are definitely starting to tease her for still being in pull-ups.

Any ideas?

[virginia]

Have you tried just having her wear undies all weekend, knowing she’ll make messes, so she can figure out/realize the sensation of going? I think I’d go cold turkey over a long weekend, making her clean up messes, and go from there.

[auntie]

Jul 25, 2018 20:08:05 GMT -5 jr009j said:

Hi all- I'm wondering if anyone has any advice for potty training an almost 4 year old girl.  Though she has no official diagnosis, she's a sensory seeker, with a lot of body positioning issues.  


What do you mean by the bolded? Does she have posturing or clenching?


She was a delayed walker (walking at almost 2). We have seen her pediatrician, a GI doctor, and a urologist to rule out any medical issues. Her OT and PT have no ideas on how to help.  And a professional potty trainer rejected her because she hasn't had success with kids with special needs. 


Wow, I didn't even know there was potty training was something one could hire out. Wow. 

This sounds almost more neurological than anything else. Is she bowel trained at all? Does she sense the need to move her bowels (i.e. seek privacy?, squat?) Has she been evaluated for a tethered cord or milder presentations of spina bifida?

It seems to me that she doesn't know how to release her urine, as she'll sit for an hour on the potty and do nothing. And she can't tell us before she pees or even while she's peeing, its always after when she's wet. She typically holds it all day until she can't hold anymore and it basically explodes out of her.   We've tried all the tricks to get her to release (running water, blowing bubbles, glitter jar, dripping water over her genitals...) with no results.  This has been a problem for at least a year (since we first attempted to potty train her), but I think it started earlier.


Have you ever tried the hand in warm water thing when she's been dry for a time?

[jr009j]

Jul 26, 2018 7:40:22 GMT -5 auntie said:

Jul 25, 2018 20:08:05 GMT -5 jr009j said:

Hi all- I'm wondering if anyone has any advice for potty training an almost 4 year old girl.  Though she has no official diagnosis, she's a sensory seeker, with a lot of body positioning issues.  


What do you mean by the bolded? Does she have posturing or clenching?


She was a delayed walker (walking at almost 2). We have seen her pediatrician, a GI doctor, and a urologist to rule out any medical issues. Her OT and PT have no ideas on how to help.  And a professional potty trainer rejected her because she hasn't had success with kids with special needs. 


Wow, I didn't even know there was potty training was something one could hire out. Wow. 

This sounds almost more neurological than anything else. Is she bowel trained at all? Does she sense the need to move her bowels (i.e. seek privacy?, squat?) Has she been evaluated for a tethered cord or milder presentations of spina bifida?

It seems to me that she doesn't know how to release her urine, as she'll sit for an hour on the potty and do nothing. And she can't tell us before she pees or even while she's peeing, its always after when she's wet. She typically holds it all day until she can't hold anymore and it basically explodes out of her.   We've tried all the tricks to get her to release (running water, blowing bubbles, glitter jar, dripping water over her genitals...) with no results.  This has been a problem for at least a year (since we first attempted to potty train her), but I think it started earlier.


Have you ever tried the hand in warm water thing when she's been dry for a time?

She had an MRI yesterday to check for a tethered spine- it came back normal. She’s not bowel trained at all. She tends to poop standing up or laying down but again it just happens without any indication of control. She’s had more success on the potty with BM but I think they’re just easier to catch.

I’ll try the hand in warm water. I can’t remember if we tried it or not.

[sahara78]

Does she urinate more often throughout the day in a pull-up or does she still hold it for long periods? If not she’s not going more often, I’d also think it was a physical issue. Good to hear her MRI was clear, though.

[funchicken]

My only suggestion is to get her to sit on the potty the second she wakes up in the morning. Sometimes when they're not quite awake it's easier for them to release, plus they usually have to go pretty badly at that time.

[jr009j]

Jul 26, 2018 9:48:37 GMT -5 sahara78 said:

Does she urinate more often throughout the day in a pull-up or does she still hold it for long periods? If not she’s not going more often, I’d also think it was a physical issue. Good to hear her MRI was clear, though.

She tends to have one big pee about 3 and then dribbles after that regardless of pull up or not. I liken it to be drunk and breaking the seal and having to go every 3 minutes after.

I really think there is a physical issue but her urologist is stuck on a developmental delay and wouldn’t refer for further testing until she follows his potty training methods. I think I’m going to follow them for a month and then switch doctors if necessary. My MIL is a doctor and is researching other possible issues.

[jr009j]

Jul 26, 2018 11:22:38 GMT -5 funchicken said:

My only suggestion is to get her to sit on the potty the second she wakes up in the morning. Sometimes when they're not quite awake it's easier for them to release, plus they usually have to go pretty badly at that time.

I’ll try that.