Post by mightymaude on Nov 6, 2018 17:25:23 GMT -5
Today was conference day. It went about as expected. DS is performing well but is not managing balancing his special interest with his schoolwork well. His teachers indulge him too much because his special interest happens to be their weakness--he has turned himself into their little IT guy. At several points his homeroom teacher has had him teach whole-class lessons on how to do things because she couldn't explain it as well as him. So, we had a bit of a point of contention that she feeds into said special interest. But, anyway, otherwise he's fine. He wants to get straight A honor roll, so it's nice to see that he has a goal.
DD is failing all of her tests but performing well in non-anxiety inducing situations. She is still practicing avoidant behaviors when it comes to classwork, and one day asked to go get water 20x in 90 minutes. I know (esp as a teacher myself) that teachers always try to find good things to say about a kid, but it was nice to see that her teacher recognizes that a lot of things are going on inside of DD's brain that she can't always get out. She commented that DD recognizes a pattern immediately and has several times announced to the class that there will be a substitute the next day before the teacher does, b/c she recognizes what is being set up.
Lastly, after a horrific Halloween, we had a weekend of birthday parties. Saturday was a birthday party for twins that DD is "friends" with. ("Friends" because she mostly just watches them but really likes them and is thrilled that they all have the same birthday.) It was rough going, but she made it through their massive birthday party without melting down. Hers was on Sunday, and those two girls, her two cousins, and two neighborhood girls were invited. Twenty-two people ended up in our house, because all of the adults also invited themselves, and one 6th grader appeared too. DD was AMAZING. After essentially having an extreme anxiety attack about too many people trying to get in her house only five days earlier, she ran around giggling and acting like the most neuro-typical girl ever. Squealing over pretty dresses, doing crafts and complimenting others' pictures, giving tours of the house...it was an entirely different kid.
DD has had an amazing start to the school year! Her teachers were very positive at her conference, and said they saw a maturity leap after the summer. They think it is because she went to sleep away camp. I think that is part of it, but also her friendship with a certain classmate has really been solidified (and her mom and I are becoming really close too - we have talked about vacationing as a group). I think having a secure friendship with a solid individual has been amazing for her. She doesn’t have to worry about who likes her and who doesn’t as much. She’s even navigating the social waters when she or her friend have other friends over for play dates etc. Of course, a good meds balance helps all of that! Still taking Strattera, guanfacine, AND Ritalin (short acting, tiny dose). Three meds seems crazy but it is just what she needs. Plus she still takes Prevacid and a couple of supplements.
The time has changed and I can already see some deterioration of behavior especially at night. I honestly think she has SAD. I am going to try full spectrum bulbs this year, and research supplements other than Vit D. Any suggestions?
Therapeutic Riding is still going really well. Her instructors are pleased, she is riding off lead most of the time now (though her horse hates it), and still getting private lessons. She is also very much looking forward to the show in the spring. ❤️
DS is doing really well. I was worried about ADHD, but it seems the teachers have no concerns and he is doing well academically. And psych never called me back, so I decided that at this time anyway we would not be able to get a diagnosis. I addressed the issue with a behavior chart which went really well. I figured psych would have come back with behavior recommendations rather than medication anyway, so I went ahead in that direction. He completed the chart, and we have seen a big improvement in his behavior and not even that but managing his behavior in the eyes of aftercare staff. Aftercare went out of their way to tell me he was doing well because even if he had the occasional slip up they could see he was really trying. We are currently working on handwriting (without tears) and starting doing pen pals with his cousins, so he was super excited about that!
He did so amazing at soccer. He was one of the best players on the team of about 10 kids. There were 4 boys that were really good, and he was one of them. He even went roller skating. He had to have his wheels tightened quite a bit, but he was able to stay upright and get himself around the rink several times with holding onto the edges. Considering when we went ice skating 2-3 years ago, he was a complete limp noodle this was great for him. I think ice skating is harder anyway though.
They changed the law for direct access to physical therapists in our state, so my PT said he could see DS for his bike riding/ balance. So I am planning on that for the summer. Unfortunately due to work, I would have to see if they could have him come at 5 though. It's either that or the I Can Ride camp here, but it is problematic for work because it is 2 hours a day, so I would have to leave to pick him up and bring him to work with me for a week, but I might still sign him up. He is taking a break, and we shall see how he does when he starts basketball. Last year watching basketball was seriously cringeworty, so we shall see how it goes this year. I figure it can only get better.
DS is enjoying 5th grade. He likes his (male) teacher. He is in band, and the band director is awesome. We're having a helluva time getting him to practice regularly and she has reached out weekly to see how he is doing and how she can help. She has been giving him free side lessons to help him keep up with the other kids. She has a son who loves band but hates to practice at home so she seems to relate. DS has new friends this year, and has retained some from last year.
The biggest AW- he played flag football this fall, football being his special interest du jour. It.was.awesome. It didn't hurt that his team was amazing and they were almost undefeated. His teammates offered appropriate feedback, always made sure he had opportunities to score (e.g. easy passing plays near the end zone), and the coaches were very patient and yet treated him the same as the other players (e.g. appropriately yelling at him when he wasn't doing what he was supposed to do). DH, who has a hard time interacting with DS in these types of social events, even stepped up his game and helped during practice and got to know the coaches. DS held it together amazingly well. He never scored a point all season, but he also took penalties in stride. Once he ran in a touchdown but his teammate was called for holding so they had to redo the play. He wasn't phased at all. He did, however, start to cry when he failed to score a TD in the last game. He said it was his last game and his last chance to score and I thought my heart was going to burst. He had a perfect attendance for practice and games, even when it was freezing cold and raining- something I'd never get him to do for Scouts!
First grade has been going really well. DS loves his school. He has had a couple of incidents where he did socially inappropriate things but I think they were handled well.
My big push this year is to have dinner be more of a conversation-and-catch-up time for us. In part we need to limit his screen time -- our current agreement is that he can have up to 40 minutes per day, but we haven't yet figured out how to enforce that. Also, I feel like his tastes are maturing enough that I don't have to make separate child and adult meals for us. The big AW is that we manage to have a nice dinner at least once a week. Meaning we are eating the same thing, and he is present enough to tell me a little bit about his day and actually have a short reciprocal conversation with me.
miranda , love his flag football story. DS really wants to play, and I had to search all over for one that wasn't tackle, but I think I found one for next fall.
Ours was the NFL sponsored Flag Football program. It was cheap, and he get a really nice Vikings jersey. DS is now hell-bent on playing tackle. He has a friend who plays on a league so he's very jelly. Even the friend's mom is trying to reassure me it's no big deal- "But they don't allow head hits!" Sorry, not gonna happen.