Let's complain

[ilovecandy]

About anything.

Me first I fucking hate the cold only one more winter left here please for the love of God let us go back south after this.

Also I am having my friends who complained about the emergency alert to lower your temp thermostat for gas furnaces. One of the gas centers that provides it caught on fire yesterday. So yes I would rather lower my temp and be slightly colder than I am used to inside than be completely without because they don't have enough gas generators? ( Don't know the official word for it) working right now because of the fire. Because it is fucking -15 degrees right now and with wind chill feels like -40. This is not the day to crash the whole system because you won't lower your fucking heat. Trust me your kids will survive and not freeze at 65 degrees and so will you.

[seeyalater52]

I’m having extreme anxiety about whether my estrogen is rising fast enough and whether my lining will look ok at the check on Weds. I think it is mostly just estrogen-fueled craziness (my RE said my levels are fine) but I feel like crap emotionally right now.

I’m beyond over treatments and bitter af about needing a 4th transfer with no successful pregnancies so far.

I am grumpy because I had to get up at 5am to catch this flight for a day trip to DC for work. I’m tired. And this is an important meeting.

Work has been insanely busy these past few months and will be until at least April or May. I’m tired of being behind and panicked about being behind and not being able to respond as quickly as I’d like to the endless fires that need to be put out constantly.

I kind of want to pull my hair out right now!

And I keep my house at 63 usually (I’m cheap lol) so definitely agreed that 65 to keep the system from crashing is just fine!!

[G22]

One of my dogs is having diarrhea and I can't figure out which one, because they do it while we are gone. We had the same problem a week ago and narrowed it down to our older husky and got her feeling better. I'm splitting them up when we leave today so I can figure it out. I'm so tired of cleaning up poop.

My H is working swing shift right now (kind of like 2nd shift I guess outside of the military?) and is basically nonexistent. I'm tired of being the one to take care of everything (see above complaint) with no help.

[vmars]

Thank god for this and place keeping me sane. I still can’t believe this time last week I thought I would never need to consider doing IVF, but today it is my new reality. Tomorrow is my HSG and when I will schedule my initial RE consult. Today I have to go to the dentist. I scheduled it like 6 months ago so I am not canceling, but it basically adds to the suck that is this shitty week. Hoping I feel better this weekend so I can go to my Zumba class. They really help me feel human again.

[G22]

Also my body is rebeling and I'm spotting through the bcp. My nurse said everything looks fine on the u/s and I'm fine to move forward, but it's still annoying. It can't just be easy and straight forward.

[ilovecandy]

My car wouldn't start this morning if that isn't a sign I don't know what is.


Also my h is getting irritable and testy over stupid shit. He is making me mad at him because of the stupid shit he is picking on because of his mood. The dogs are going stir crazy because we send them out to use the bathroom and bring them right back which means pretty much no outside time at all.

Seeyalater I hope your travels go okay.

G22 poor doggy and seeing shifts suck

Vmars hoping for a good hsg. We have all been there with the feeling of I can't believe we are at the point of ivf/treatments hugs.

[megstoo]

I started taxes. They SUCK. Normally we get 5 figures back, not this year. My ONLY saving grace is if there is any was that I prepaid the first IVF treatment the very last day of December so I could claim it on taxes because I knew the medical deduction % was increasing for 2019. Just in medical expenses alone we had over 15k. DH's portion of that was $10.

[stellelinds25]

It's f-ing cold...I hate winter.

I miss my dad...he's been gone for 6 weeks and I really thought things would start to be better by now, but some days it's just as fresh as it was in the days right after he passed. And yes, my emotions are a fricking mess thanks to the hormones.

I'm getting to that uncomfortable stage of the ER process...lots of tinging/cramping type pains and feeling bloated.

I just sat in an hour long meeting listening to two people talk who just need to STFU...their voices are literally like nails on a chalkboard to me right now. And yes, my moods are also a fricking mess thanks to the hormones. (My poor H, ha! Emotional & moody me is a BAD combo for him!)

[robinsbff]

like everyone around me is pregnant and i'm so over it. i'm having such a tough time with people who keep talking about getting pregnant the first month of trying, or how easy it was, and "all it takes is for DH to look at me and i get pregnant". STFU all of you.

[moonriver]

My bff and I started TTC#2 at the same time and she’s due with her baby this month. Meanwhile, I’ve gone back to my RE for treatment and this cycle was a bust. Also, since she got pregnant she has barely spoken to me. We used to hang out weekly at a minimum and talk almost every day. I don’t really know what to think about it all.

My childhood bff’s mom was just diagnosed with brain cancer. It’s obviously not looking good and I just can’t believe it. I honestly spent half my childhood at their home, and I’m so broken for my friend.

[moonriver]

Jan 31, 2019 21:55:45 GMT -5 robinsbff said:

like everyone around me is pregnant and i'm so over it. i'm having such a tough time with people who keep talking about getting pregnant the first month of trying, or how easy it was, and "all it takes is for DH to look at me and i get pregnant". STFU all of you.

Yup. I had a friend (who I haven’t spoken to in a long time) text me the other day “hey! I’m due with baby no2 tomorrow- once she’s here I’d love for you to come over and hang out!” She doesn’t know about my struggle to get pregnant so I don’t fault her, I’m just sad.

[moonriver]

seeyalater52 I’m sorry you’re feeling so anxious.

[landmermaid]

@@@@

Today was my due date for my missed miscarriage that ended at almost 11 weeks.

[robinsbff]

Feb 1, 2019 17:02:05 GMT -5 landmermaid said:

@@@@

Today was my due date for my missed miscarriage that ended at almost 11 weeks.

i'm so sorry. many hugs to you.  

[seeyalater52]

Feb 1, 2019 17:02:05 GMT -5 landmermaid said:

@@@@

Today was my due date for my missed miscarriage that ended at almost 11 weeks.

I’m so sorry. My first miscarriage due date is coming up in March and I’m already struggling. It is just the worst feeling (and particularly not having a successful pregnancy in the interim feels like a cruel joke. Ugh.)

[vmars]

Jan 31, 2019 21:55:45 GMT -5 robinsbff said:

like everyone around me is pregnant and i'm so over it. i'm having such a tough time with people who keep talking about getting pregnant the first month of trying, or how easy it was, and "all it takes is for DH to look at me and i get pregnant". STFU all of you.

I never understood people like that. My first child took a “normal” amount of time to conceive, but I never told anyone that. I understood that not everyone had an easy time trying to conceive. Weirdly I did have people specifically ask me how long it took. At that point I would tell them “not too long”.

I am dreading what I will say if I do have a successful IVF cycle. Part of me is like whatever, I will be upfront and tell people and another part thinks I will keep it close to my chest. I haven’t decided.

[Jalapeñomel]

Feb 2, 2019 8:00:53 GMT -5 vmars said:

Jan 31, 2019 21:55:45 GMT -5 robinsbff said:

like everyone around me is pregnant and i'm so over it. i'm having such a tough time with people who keep talking about getting pregnant the first month of trying, or how easy it was, and "all it takes is for DH to look at me and i get pregnant". STFU all of you.

I never understood people like that. My first child took a “normal” amount of time to conceive, but I never told anyone that. I understood that not everyone had an easy time trying to conceive. Weirdly I did have people specifically ask me how long it took. At that point I would tell them “not too long”.

I am dreading what I will say if I do have a successful IVF cycle. Part of me is like whatever, I will be upfront and tell people and another part thinks I will keep it close to my chest. I haven’t decided.

I’m very upfront with my IVF and honest when people say things that hurt. I told my pregnant coworker on Thursday that it’s hard to be around the pregnant women. And that I meant no offense, but it’s a painful reminder of my infertility. So many people just don’t know, and I find that telling them, they usually are much more sensitive.

I also realize that many people are not comfortable talking about their private lives.

[G22]

Feb 2, 2019 8:00:53 GMT -5 vmars said:

Jan 31, 2019 21:55:45 GMT -5 robinsbff said:

like everyone around me is pregnant and i'm so over it. i'm having such a tough time with people who keep talking about getting pregnant the first month of trying, or how easy it was, and "all it takes is for DH to look at me and i get pregnant". STFU all of you.

I never understood people like that. My first child took a “normal” amount of time to conceive, but I never told anyone that. I understood that not everyone had an easy time trying to conceive. Weirdly I did have people specifically ask me how long it took. At that point I would tell them “not too long”.

I am dreading what I will say if I do have a successful IVF cycle. Part of me is like whatever, I will be upfront and tell people and another part thinks I will keep it close to my chest. I haven’t decided.

Like Mel, I'm also upfront with people. It took us 5 years and 9 rounds of IF treatment before we got our son. So if someone makes an offhand or insensitive comment, I have no problem saying I have no idea what it's like to get pregnant easily because we had to do IVF.

This time I've just straight up told people we are doing fertility treatments again. It either shuts them up or they suddenly get sympathetic usually. Either way, it makes the conversation less awkward for me to just be up front about it. (This is with people I know. Usually if it's a stranger I just let it go and keep my mouth shut).

However you decide to respond is up to you. Do whatever feels comfortable! ((Hugs))

[Jalapeñomel]

Feb 2, 2019 11:20:37 GMT -5 G22 said:

Feb 2, 2019 8:00:53 GMT -5 vmars said:

I never understood people like that. My first child took a “normal” amount of time to conceive, but I never told anyone that. I understood that not everyone had an easy time trying to conceive. Weirdly I did have people specifically ask me how long it took. At that point I would tell them “not too long”.

I am dreading what I will say if I do have a successful IVF cycle. Part of me is like whatever, I will be upfront and tell people and another part thinks I will keep it close to my chest. I haven’t decided.

Like Mel, I'm also upfront with people. It took us 5 years and 9 rounds of IF treatment before we got our son. So if someone makes an offhand or insensitive comment, I have no problem saying I have no idea what it's like to get pregnant easily because we had to do IVF.

This time I've just straight up told people we are doing fertility treatments again. It either shuts them up or they suddenly get sympathetic usually. Either way, it makes the conversation less awkward for me to just be up front about it. (This is with people I know. Usually if it's a stranger I just let it go and keep my mouth shut).

However you decide to respond is up to you. Do whatever feels comfortable! ((Hugs))

I do think it’s much easier for those of us who have been struggling with IF for years to talk about it, because we’ve come to terms with it (well to the best of our abilities). I was in such denial at the beginning, it took me forever to go to an RE, let alone discuss the struggles outside the confines of the internet.

[vmars]

Feb 2, 2019 16:54:32 GMT -5 Jalapeñomel said:

Feb 2, 2019 11:20:37 GMT -5 G22 said:

Like Mel, I'm also upfront with people. It took us 5 years and 9 rounds of IF treatment before we got our son. So if someone makes an offhand or insensitive comment, I have no problem saying I have no idea what it's like to get pregnant easily because we had to do IVF.

This time I've just straight up told people we are doing fertility treatments again. It either shuts them up or they suddenly get sympathetic usually. Either way, it makes the conversation less awkward for me to just be up front about it. (This is with people I know. Usually if it's a stranger I just let it go and keep my mouth shut).

However you decide to respond is up to you. Do whatever feels comfortable! ((Hugs))

I do think it’s much easier for those of us who have been struggling with IF for years to talk about it, because we’ve come to terms with it (well to the best of our abilities). I was in such denial at the beginning, it took me forever to go to an RE, let alone discuss the struggles outside the confines of the internet.

My hesitation comes from hearing things my coworkers have said in the past. One coworker’s daughter is my age and has had early losses and a failed IVF cycle. They downplayed her early losses and basically said back in their day they wouldn’t have even known they had an early miscarriage. Idk I have heard them say some really insensitive things surrounding miscarriage and the whole process. I know they wouldn’t say anything to my face if they knew, but it makes me want to protect my feelings. I have learned through past experience people can say some super shitty things and even though I generally call them out on it, I hate having to deal with those situations.

[G22]

Feb 2, 2019 16:54:32 GMT -5 Jalapeñomel said:

Feb 2, 2019 11:20:37 GMT -5 G22 said:

Like Mel, I'm also upfront with people. It took us 5 years and 9 rounds of IF treatment before we got our son. So if someone makes an offhand or insensitive comment, I have no problem saying I have no idea what it's like to get pregnant easily because we had to do IVF.

This time I've just straight up told people we are doing fertility treatments again. It either shuts them up or they suddenly get sympathetic usually. Either way, it makes the conversation less awkward for me to just be up front about it. (This is with people I know. Usually if it's a stranger I just let it go and keep my mouth shut).

However you decide to respond is up to you. Do whatever feels comfortable! ((Hugs))

I do think it’s much easier for those of us who have been struggling with IF for years to talk about it, because we’ve come to terms with it (well to the best of our abilities). I was in such denial at the beginning, it took me forever to go to an RE, let alone discuss the struggles outside the confines of the internet.

Yes I absolutely agree! It took me over 2 years to even start the testing process and begin treatment. I didnt talk about it with anyone off these boards until 3 years in. And mostly I did because I'd hit a breaking point, was angry and wanted people to stop asking when we were having kids.

I know it's not easy to share such a sensitive, painful revelation. It was actually really scary for me when I finally started to, because I didnt really know what people's reactions would be. I hope I don't sound flippant about sharing, I've just been at this for a long time and feel comfortable sharing my journey due to that.

[ilovecandy]

Feb 2, 2019 16:54:32 GMT -5 Jalapeñomel said:

Feb 2, 2019 11:20:37 GMT -5 G22 said:

Like Mel, I'm also upfront with people. It took us 5 years and 9 rounds of IF treatment before we got our son. So if someone makes an offhand or insensitive comment, I have no problem saying I have no idea what it's like to get pregnant easily because we had to do IVF.

This time I've just straight up told people we are doing fertility treatments again. It either shuts them up or they suddenly get sympathetic usually. Either way, it makes the conversation less awkward for me to just be up front about it. (This is with people I know. Usually if it's a stranger I just let it go and keep my mouth shut).

However you decide to respond is up to you. Do whatever feels comfortable! ((Hugs))

I do think it’s much easier for those of us who have been struggling with IF for years to talk about it, because we’ve come to terms with it (well to the best of our abilities). I was in such denial at the beginning, it took me forever to go to an RE, let alone discuss the struggles outside the confines of the internet.

X10000. I first shared with my mom. Slowly we Sharee with our other parents. Eventually our siblings. After 2? Or so years we were much more open about it publicly. But I also have no qualms about telling people when they are being hurtful. I also have posted a lot in my past about ways people can be sensitive to people with infertility and if anyone asks me I tell me them how they can be sensitive and not a jackass about it. The men on my side of the family are still stupid about it ocassionally but usually I tell them too top or just end that conversation and leave. Depends on where I am at emotionally that day.

If you have been in the journey long enough I think k there just comes a point where you are just tired of giving non answers answers do you want kids? M well maybe someday now I openly say I have to have medical help to have a kid.