What was your worst date ever?

[mikehoncho]

I have a few:

-I went on a date with a guy I met on Myspace (first mistake). We met somewhere for dinner then left my car and went to the beach in his (second mistake). At the beach he proceeded to tell me about his ex girlfriend and how if she were to call "like right now" he'd "totally not be here with me" YIKES. So I said I didn't feel good (after he tried to go in for a kiss.. really though?) and on the way back to my car he took a wrong turn. I've mentioned before that I'm a super paranoid person, so I interpret this as him about to murder me. I said, "UM my car is THAT way" to which he replied, "You know what my biggest pet peeve is? When people backseat drive." I couldn't get out of there fast enough.

Theeennnnn.. I guess this isn't really a date but I dated a guy for a few weeks at CMU. D (my now husband) and I broke up for a couple months when I moved up. This is when I met Jami. Yes he spelled it that way. I called him Jam-y and it forever made me LOL. Anyway, he was a totally great guy..like too good to be true awesome. Then I found out he had a girlfriend. And she thought they were waiting til they were married to have sex. This was about two nights after we had sex. I just about died.

Oh, and I went on a date with a guy at CMU named Minty. I didn't hold it against him..because he didn't get to pick his name..
Moral of the story, if his name is Minty and he walks around campus in a suit it's not because he is pledging to be in a frat. He's a creep.

[erniebufflo]

I'm a lame-o who only dated my hubby. But. On one of our early dates he both locked his keys in the car and locked himself out of his house. He had to shove me through a window, WITH BARS ON IT, to get into the house. I barely fit, and in fact, we had to pull me back out and take off my belt in order to shove me through.

[mikehoncho]

Ha! That is awesome. And that doesn't make you a lame-o! I think that is kind of amazing and cool! We met when I was 17 so I don't think either of us thought we would end up where we are with each other.

[monkeybabe]

I've never dated. I want to have interesting stories.

[mscatra]

OK, weird. My worst date ever was with a guy who worked security of some sort at CMU and Soaring Eagle.

I was selling a freezer and he bought it. We chatted and he asked me out. He arrived to pick me up for a late dinner with his giant dog in tow, which besides being WEIRD could have gotten me kicked out of my apartment complex as dogs were stictly not allowed at all on the premises. We went to a crappy chain steakhouse where he never shut up and was visually confused at some of the words I used when I finally was able to get a word in. He talked to much he didn't notice the restaurant was closing (seriously, the servers were putting the chairs on the tables around us) and I had to point it out to him that the workers prrrrobably wanted to go home. When he dropped me off at my apt he asked if he could use my bathroom before heading home then proceeded to sit on my couch and talk about himself some more while I coaxed my cat into sitting on my lap to protect me from his hand obviously wandering ever closer into my lap. After much violently fake yawning and comments about work the next day I finally got him to leave, where he tried to kiss me, which I deflected with an ass-out hug. He called me to make another date and sent me a huge flower arrangement the next day. Oblivious much?

[amandar204]

Worst date- I was 17 and chatting online (yahoo messenger) with a 33 year old man from Chicago. We webcammed a lot he seemed cute enough...really it was like before I had a real BF and I wasn't allowed to go out much, so I wasn't picky lol.

He came to visit and when he stepped out of the car he was like 5 inches shorter than me and bald and chunky... I thought whatev he's nice. we went out and we were making out in the car. He made a strange face and said "oh I just came." I said where? he said in my pants...I had to think about it for a min. I was like OH how? he said I don't know I just did do you have a napkin? lol. I never saw him again. I swear I wasn't even like rubbing him or anything just kissing. I always laugh about that and think DAMN I MUST BE A HELLUVA KISSER!

[mikehoncho]

Ugh baby carrot guy I dated was a jizz in his pants-er too! We would start making out then BAM he was like "UH..I'm gonna go shower" Yeah, that's not obvious. Amanda that guy must have thought he won the lottery just looking at you.

[eav2c]

Hmmm... I guess the worst one was when I dated this guy with IBS and he literally spent more than half the movie we went to see in the bathroom. I mean, he couldn't help it but it was really awkward.

[amandar204]

lol thanks honcho. Idk i guess he is a premature ejaculata. whats the jizz in my pants song?

[mikehoncho]

Oh no! That is my worst nightmare. Not being on a date with a pooper but being the pooper on the date. The first year of our relationship I refused to poop at D's place. I would drive to walgreens.


Gisa- So you aren't into vintage clothing? That's my fantasy for you... churning my butter

[mikehoncho]

Sept 19, 2012 22:36:23 GMT -5 @amandar204 said:

lol thanks honcho. Idk i guess he is a premature ejaculata. whats the jizz in my pants song?

www.youtube.com/watch?v=4pXfHLUlZf4
your welcome ^^

[eav2c]

Actually, I have an embarrassing story.

I hadnt crapped in like a week. I need to take the activia challenge. Anyhoo, DH and I had been dating about 3 months and we were going to go on a date. I took a laxative earlier that day to help get me flowing... On the way home it all hit me. It was like breathing through contractions. When we got to my place I ran to the bathroom and yea... He heard it all. Anyways, still happily together 5.5 years later. However I was sure I was doomed.

[amandar204]

oh dear lord...now gangnam style has competition in my head.

[amandar204]

Never noticed how ejaculatory edward and bella make their faces.

[thedahliharpa]

Oh gosh it makes me cringe. I went to a party and drank too muchband left after giving my # to a cute guy who lived at the house where the party was held. We talked on the phone a few times and set up a date to go see Fight Club. His car was allegedly broken so I drove to the house and picked him up. Ummmmm I had apparently picked up the wrong roommate at the party! I was so confused and it was so awkward. This guy was short, not my type, and needed me to drive because he had too many DUIs. We went to one of those adult arcades before the movie and he made me ride those jockey video game horse contraptions. He kept trying to hold my hand and I was not into it. When I finally got home and was telling my friends about the night there was a big earthquake.
I had just met DH at that time. I went and sat in his section the next morning at the restaurant future DH worked at and told him there would be no future dates with that guy. Turns out there would be no dates with anyone else but DH forever and ever!

[creamsiclechica]

Matt used to shit every goddamn time we went to a restaurant, for 45 minutes. We wouldn't even get drinks yet, and I'd get the "I have to go to the bathroom," which I knew would take forever, because he usually says "I have to piss." Waiters would always think he stood me up and left me in the restaurant he'd take so long. I still married him, even though he holds the world record for longest dump in a public place.

[mikehoncho]

Sept 19, 2012 23:37:41 GMT -5 creamsiclechica said:

Matt used to shit every goddamn time we went to a restaurant, for 45 minutes. We wouldn't even get drinks yet, and I'd get the "I have to go to the bathroom," which I knew would take forever, because he usually says "I have to piss." Waiters would always think he stood me up and left me in the restaurant he'd take so long. I still married him, even though he holds the world record for longest dump in a public place.

This is hilarious! Hahahahaha

[peanuthe]

I was waiting on this guy to pick me up for my first date ever. He was extremely late without telling me he was going to be late. He also showed up with dead flowers. Needless to say, I did not go out with him.

[muppetinma]

My worst date ended up being a blessing in disguise. My best friend from high school and I had been sleeping together for years, even though he and I never actually dated. I was traveling with Disney on Ice and going through his town. I was psyched because I was going to get laid that night. (You never sleep with people on your show. It's practically incest) Well, he showed up for our date . . . . with his girlfriend. I was pissed! I waxed for nothing!

But hold the phone! There was this other guy hanging around that night. He was a friend of a friend from another show. I was pissed and horny, so I tracked him down and we hooked up.

11 years later, we've been married for eight, and we have a kid. It worked out for the best, but it's awkward when family asks how we met.