Gym members, would this bother you

[campermom]

My gym has a really awesome (ETA Ladies) locker room set up with a steam room and sauna. When I work out I use them and then shower.

There’s a sign when you first enter that says any children of the opposite sex and over age 3 are not permitted, and that there are family (ETA private)changing rooms available. Those are very nice too, roomy, with lockers both and inside and just outside, and have showers and changing tables etc. They are just down the hall.

These two ladies keep bringing their boys in the locker room changing area though. Like, not just the bathroom....this is the section where I and many other women and little girls are naked and changing clothes. They are preschool age. My son is 3.5 and they are bigger and their language is much more developed so I’m guessing 4-4.5. It’s been several weeks and it’s 2 moms together and they take their boys to change for swim lessons.

I dk if they do not notice the sign or ignoring it since it’s slightly more convenient for them to use this main locker room since it’s closer to the pool, but being a mom of 3 (2 are boys) I always used the family rooms.Occasionally you’d have to wait after swim bc other families are using it. That might be a reason they are avoiding it too.

Would this bother you or are most of you breezy about this?

[waverly]

Most gyms do until age 6-7, so no the 4-5 age would not bother me. I’ve never seen one as low as 3.

When the kids had swim class DH brought our boy and I brought our daughter to the same sex locker rooms, because the family one is much smaller and gets very very crowded. If we have to get in the pool then we can’t change without a changing room. It just gets crazy in there. Maybe different in your gym but my experience with various family locker rooms is that they are half the size with twice the people.

[sunnysally]

It would bother me that they are ignoring the posted rules. I would probably say something to an employee.

[campermom]

Feb 16, 2019 15:41:19 GMT -5 waverly said:

Most gyms do until age 6-7, so no the 4-5 age would not bother me. I’ve never seen one as low as 3.

When the kids had swim class DH brought our boy and I brought our daughter to the same sex locker rooms, because the family one is much smaller and gets very very crowded. If we have to get in the pool then we can’t change without a changing room. It just gets crazy in there. Maybe different in your gym but my experience with various family locker rooms is that they are half the size with twice the people.

The family locker room is a private locker room. One family at a time.

The locker room I’m talking about is the women’s room.

[campermom]

Feb 16, 2019 15:11:15 GMT -5 campermom said:

oops. Dup post

[jane6672]

People not following posted rules always bothers me.

[campermom]

I felt awkward, and I would have been pissed if they walked in if I had my 7 year old daughter was changing. It took me years to get her to change in there without literally hiding herself in a locker to disrobe, just with women only.

[luckystar2]

Feb 16, 2019 16:06:19 GMT -5 campermom said:

I felt awkward, and I would have been pissed if they walked in if I had my 7 year old daughter was changing. It took me years to get her to change in there without literally hiding herself in a locker to disrobe, just with women only.

My dd was like this as well and yes I would be really mad if this was happening. It would also drive me even more nuts if there are posted rules about this. I would say something to staff

[luckystar2]

Feb 16, 2019 16:04:03 GMT -5 jane6672 said:

People not following posted rules always bothers me.

EXACTLY!!!

[wawa]

I don't think I'd give a fluck about 4 year olds. Since my 3 and 5 year old regularly go in the locker room with the opposite sex parent I'm not sure I'd even notice. But I'm also a rule follower, so...I feel you on that. I doubt I'd say anything

[Wines Not Whines]

I wouldn’t be bothered by 4 year olds, but if you think it would bother your DD and it’s against the rules, I think it’s reasonable to say something.

[waverly]

If they are private family locker rooms and multiple ones where they don’t have to wait forever to get one then certainly they can use them.
The ones we have around here are not private.

I knew you were talking about the women’s locker room. That was what I was referring to when I said the ones around here are usually up until age 6 for bringing children of opposite sex.

I suppose you could always ask about it at the desk if it bothers you. They might be able to tell you if there are long waits for the family locker rooms or shed some light into why. Age 4-5 still wouldn’t bother me personally. It’s more the not following rules if they act entitled.

[goldengirlz]

I don’t care about a 4 year old in a locker room. There’s nothing untoward about that.

I agree that 3 seems like a particularly young age cut-off, and while it may be the rule at your gym, it’s a rule that makes thing harder for moms of little boys for no good reason.

Once they get to elementary school age, that’s different. That’s when they begin to develop an awareness about privacy and can also change by themselves.

[vcubergirl]

3 does seem pretty young. Do they at least try to use a little discretion? If there are plenty of family rooms I would be annoyed, but at our gym there's only one and people go into the pool and forget to unlock the hallway door all the time, so it's really hard to actually use it.

Our gym the age is 6, but they recently changed the sign and now is just says children of the opposite sex. And like I said, it's hard to use the one family changing room. So I end up taking DS, who is 5, in the women's room with me. But I do try and change both of us in one of the stalls and minimize the time that he's out in the open, both for his privacy and the privacy of other ladies. When he turns 6 I guess we'll either have to wait for the family room or send him through the men's by himself, neither of which I'm really thrilled about but that's not until November.

[al320]

Yeah i definitely cant tell the difference between a 3 year old and a 4 year old. It wouldnt even occur to me to pay that much attention to a kid in the locker room unless he was like 12 or something.

If it bothers you and its against the rules, say something. It doesnt matter what we think.

[breezy8407]

Same set up at my gym with similar sign, but it says no children of opposite sex. Eliminates the guessing game of how old they are.

People not following rules bothers me.

[brooke77]

It would bother me that I follow the rules and other people consistently break them. I might mention it at the front desk if it bothers you.

Generally, I wouldn’t be bothered by a 4 year old in the Women’s locker room. My gym has signs up everywhere “No Cellphones! No personal locks!” and people disregard those rules as well. Doesn’t bother me enough to say anything.

[shauni27]

Feb 16, 2019 17:13:15 GMT -5 waverly said:

 Age 4-5 still wouldn’t bother me personally. It’s more the not following rules if they act entitled.

This exactly. I personally would not care what so ever with a boy that little in the women's locker room. Not at all. But I would be bothered that they were not following the posted rules. Not enough to say anything, but I would seethe internally about it, lol.

[osulori]

I'd be annoyed by the fact that they're not following the posted rules, for sure. Hell, my gym has a similar rule and the couple times that I've had to run AJ into the restrooms there (at the front of the locker room) because he didn't tell me he had to pee until after we left the kid center I feel bad about it. Not that there are boys that age in the women's locker room though.

[Susie]

Not breezy in these specific circumstances.  

My Y has 5 locker rooms -- women 19+, girls <18, family, men 19+, and boys <18.  That setup is possibly a bit extreme, but when you have all those options you really have no excuse not to use the correct one, especially with an opposite sex child.  I am really low-confrontation, but I've said something to women who bring little boys in the women's 19+ locker room.  There's just no reason when there's a family locker room that also opens straight into the pool, and it does make me uncomfortable to be changing in there with boys in the 3, 4, 5, 6 age bracket.  I feel totally different about this than moms who bring their sons into women's public restrooms, where a) there often is a need and lack of gender neutral alternative, b) there are stalls and people are not walking around naked.

I try really hard not to even bring my 3 yo DD into the women's, and I've only done it once or twice when I was particularly logistics-strained.  I often take her to the Y on Sat AMs, leave her at childcare while I swim, then pick her up and get her changed for her swim lesson.  One time I was running late getting out of the water, so I went out to childcare in my suit and towel to get her, and brought her back into the women's to change since that's where our stuff was in a locker.  I wouldn't have done it if she were opposite sex, and I took the time to clean the locker out so when she was done we could use the family locker room like we were supposed to.