Even though I am at work, you have been so nice. I have gotten office work done. I can come in and drink my coffee and not have to rush out the door. My kids are supposed to be cleaning. I only work 4 days this week, which is very needed. Next week is back to crazy, so I am going to enjoy this week.
Dear kids,
When I say spring clean your room, that doesn't just mean put your clothes away and vacuum. That is nice, but you also need to vacuum under the furniture (please don't kill the Roomba), wash windows, dust, declutter, and DS you need to do something with that closet. The fact that you found GI Joes stuffed in ad bin should tell you it's time to declutter since you are 15.
Dear budget,
These medical bills are taking a hit on you. Hopefully this is temporary. All of my dreams of being able to use tuition money for retirement and college savings will have to be put on hold to shore up the hit to the saving account. Such a shame that medical expenses put such a burden on people. I really feel for people without resources. Most of these treatments are needed, but without money, I assume most people would just not do it.
Signed to all - the mom, bookkeeper, taskmaster, maid, cook, ect.
PS, DH when I tell you I am stressed and need a vacation where I just have to worry about me and can wander aimlessly through the day, the correct response is not, I noticed you have been weird lately and you need to chill out and is your period still screwed up.
Signed - How are you 48 and still this dumb about women.
Dear ExH, Remember when I didn't want to use the lawn care company last year and you signed up anyway because you didn't want to deal with it yourself? And then I was mad about how stupid expensive it was to get fertilizer on our lawn? I thought you had cancelled it. Turns out, you didn't. Because they showed up yesterday to "jumpstart the season" and I got a lovely bill that I wasn't expecting. So thanks for that. Please call and cancel it ASAP, since the service is in your name and you don't actually live here anymore. Signed, The actual homeowner
Dear coworkers, I don't have all answers stored in my head to pull up at a moment's notice. If you have a question for me, expect that I'm going to need to look it up. I haven't memorized all details of all events and contracts to make your lives easier. I'm just organized and know where to look to get the answer. So it's kind of awkward when you roll up to my desk expecting instant gratification. Thanks, Me
I am over the top stressed between the senior living not getting my mom an emergency alert, them discharging her a day early, work, early morning fasting blood tests, getting DD to/from school every day, the fact that I volunteered a play date for a friends’ emergency surgery and now may be picking up my mom and DD doesn’t drive so can’t drop the kid at home, the fact that I have to fit a stress test and 24 hour cardiac monitoring into my life (the good news is I may stop choking in my sleep so you don’t have to yell at me in the middle of the night) , two kids are camping in the rain this weekend and need help packing/laundry, DD gets braces next week, DS has a follow up, we are changing DD to a pain psych but she has Biofeedback this week, I need to sort out how to do the music for the 5th grade slideshow and determine what software to use, mom’s doctor appointment Friday, your disconnecting all the cables in the playroom, that I can’t move and assemble the dining table alone and you refuse to help or do it, DD opting out of school work but still being rewarded at school with special gifted programs and invite only workshops, the barking complaint from when we were gone over Spring Break, hoping for good refs for tomorrow night against this team that plays dirty, library books are due and that’s off the top of my head.
I really don’t want to hear that “you are busy at work”. I mean, seriously?
I've had it with walking on eggshells with you. If I don't you get over reactionary angry and your actions are unpredictable. And you are offended seriously by every little thing. You look for things to be offended about and surprise you find them.
No I do not need to buy into your new juicing fad. Stop forcing it on me. While I am running around cleaning up from your new juicing fad, brushing DD's hair while she does homework because you didn't ask them to do homework last night while I was sick on the coach. The least you could do is find DD's shoes and untie them. Not have your son do it because he can't untie knots. Then get pissed at me because I grab the shoe to untie it while you try to find dance party music on Alexa and don't help per usual.
I am glad that music helps you and we like it to, but there is no place for you to spend 5 minutes getting music on Alexa which is the exact 5 minutes I am running around trying to get kids out to the bus on time and then act offended if I want to know the time or the weather to appropriately dress the kids.
ETA- I think I am going to tell him no music 15 minute before. If he wants to have a dance party he can have it earlier. Sounds ridiculous.
Dear DH How did you not know that DD switched classes or practice schedules for gymnastics. It has been the hot topic at home for the last 2 weeks. DD knew her schedule, I got rides to and from all scheduled out which don't include you. The only thing different is instead of picking her up from aftercare on Thursday and Friday you need to pick her up on Wednesday and Friday. Plus I've been asking you to pick up the night before all season without you saying anything. I swear your therapist nights make you are b$tch.
Also I needed to know if you were going to be in town or not this weekend so I could make arrangements for DD. I don't want any moping from you because you said you would stay home and not go play.
Stressed wife who has too many balls in the air and I feel like it is going to all come crashing down
Post by erinshelley21 on Apr 3, 2019 12:37:43 GMT -5
Dear Body, Do you really have to just shut down, get sick and have a low grade fever for a few days whenever my schedule gets too busy? There was light at the end of the tunnel because the madness was over and I was supposed to kick ass at the challenge for the gym this month. Life was getting back on track after 3 weeks of going and going nonstop. But now I'm just exhausted with a temp hoovering around 100.6 and the sickness has made it to my chest, so it'll be another few days at least before I feel better. WHY?!?! Love, I take vitamins, eat well and exercise. Why you gotta be like this?
Dear brother, THANK YOU for agreeing to let this consultant get these environmental tests done with grant money! We are saving thousands doing it this way. I never thought I'd get you to agree! Love, your sister who will hold off on hitting you
Dear DH, I hope we can plan a date soon. I like you and would like to keep it that way. Love, your wife
You really need to do more public speaking because the sweats, sleepless nights, headache and feeling like I'm going to puke any minute are no good for your presentation in one hour.
Panic mode has set in. Please let this go okay.
Dear DD3,
Why last night and today!? Of all nights to be up every hour and puking all over your crib...
Is the nausea from stress/panic from said presentation to our owners or did I catch your stomach bug???
Manage your schedule. If you have lunch scheduled with me at 11:45, it's annoying as hell for you to tell me at 11:30 that you're just walking into a meeting and you "think" you'll be done by 11:45. Especially when I've worked for your company, and that company can't start or end a meeting on time to save it's life.
You know what I do if I have plans at 11:45 and someone tries to rope me into an 11:30 meeting? It's either important enough that I cancel my prior plans entirely or I let them know "I have an appointment at 11:30, but I can do 2 pm, or tomorrow, or whatever other time works."
It would be one thing if this were the first time... but it's not.
Signed, I passed up on a FREE lunch to go to lunch with you, so your ass better not flake on me.
PS: My new company is great in this respect. In 4 years, I've only had one meeting start or end more than 1 minute late. And people who have worked here for 15 years were shocked that it started late because we have a corporate culture that respects people's time and it is the most fabulous thing ever.
It's official today that I now have the other department under me. I would like to request prayers or good vibes for my first day tomorrow and for Monday which is my Grand Jury appearance day. I hope they tell me not to come back the next day.
TMI- when I get nervous I have to pee often, so I've been in the bathroom like every half hour today FFS.
When you propose a “solution” to a “problem” in my area that doesn’t actually exist, and you know nothing about my area of expertise, don’t blame me when you’ve wasted political capital on selling said “solution”. Also, it would be awesome if you understood what I do before you try to judge how well I’m doing it. Because I’m actually pretty flipping awesome at my job.
Worker Who Is Now Going to Waste Time and Money Creating an Utterly Useless Workflow
You are amazing! I can't believe you are already half over! Please continue for at least two more weeks so I can try to get caught up on everything I need to get done before next week.
Sincerely, Exhausted Teacher Finally Getting Some Sleep
Dear Research Articles,
Please read and outline yourselves. My eyes are starting to bleed from all the repetitiveness of reading the same thing. Please and thanks!
Sincerely, So Done with ALL the Reading
Dear Ferret,
This habit you have gotten into during Spring Break of wanting to go out at 3:00am to "potty" which then results in you running laps like a maniac all over the yard for 20 minutes and not going "potty" is not going to work for me. I know you're happy to have me at home all day, but let me sleep!!! Good thing you're cute!
Thank you so much for babysitting while I went out with friends last night and then spending the night at my house so I could leave for a flight at 5 am (DH is out of town). I don’t know what I’d do without you!
Signed, Also must get on finding another babysitter since babysitter #2 moved away last month
Dear Global Entry,
Quickly crossing the busiest border in the world on Tuesday made you totally worth the $ and dragging the whole family to the border for our interviews.
Signed, Also glad the border didn’t close while I was in Mexico
Dear client,
Please don’t freak out when I present 4Q18 investment returns today.
Dear DH, I was elated at lunch that you went to the school to adjust DS’ boot when the sub nurse could not figure it out. That elation turned to incredulity when DS walked into my office. I mean, what on earth? No, I can’t “hang out with him for a bit”. You broke it, you buy it. I know you have to work. Me too! He could easily have stayed at school. You are a sucker. I am on back to back meetings - double booked - for the rest of the day. I did manage to mute for a minute when he just reappeared again and he said he wants to play football with the nanny. Which is fine. And also proves he’s totally okay. 30 minutes until the nanny arrives with DD, he’s all yours until then.