Talk to me about dating as an overweight woman

[mysterons]

I think I have a lot to offer a potential mate but am afraid I'll never get the chance because I'm overweight. I am trying to lose weight but it's slow going. I need to lose 60 lbs to be within a healthy range.

Carrying this extra weight makes me feel really insecure about dating.

Please feel free to share any advice or stories if you have experience with this. Thanks!

[achase123]

Well first of all, kuddos to you for getting healthier. I have had really good luck tracking what I eat using Sparkpeople. Are you using something similar?

As far as dating, I think that it's all about confidence and the way you carry yourself. Also dressing to enhance your best assets will help you feel good as well. I know plenty of people in your shoes and they don't have any trouble getting dates. I think that it truly is just how you feel about yourself. Men will pick up on that vibe that you put out. I would think that knowing you are making these positive changes for yourself should help you feel a lot better and less self conscious.

[starryfish]

I was on eharmony before I lost 30 lbs (At that point I was about 40 lbs over my normal BMI). I still got people that messaged me and wanted to go out on dates. I just wasnt ready yet from my divorce.

My sister is about 60lbs overweight and just joined POF and gets lots of messages. She has a very specific type that I think will make it harder for her to date (she likes really really thin guys).

[marigoldgirl]

I do think that men are attracted to a confident, positive woman. I am about 40 lbs overweight and I did not have to much trouble attracting men. I love myself and have a lot to offer. BF likes me the way I am. My weight has had no impact on my dating or sex life.

[BookLover]

I'm with everyone else. If you are confident, you will attract men who like that. Not all men are into slender women. I have met and dated several guys that like curvy girls. I'm curvy, and I didn't have many issues.

[prettyinpearls]

I'll echo the pp's and say it's about your confidence not your weight. If a man doesn't want to be with you because you're overweight, he's not good enough for you anyway.

[theycallmeliz]

Ive actually had this conversation with my BF. He was really attracted to my confidence, happy, energetic presence. I have always been interested in being active outdoors, like biking, camping, swimming, etc and BF said that is what was important to him.

I say, be honest, be forward and don't be afraid to be sexy!

[formerlyak]

I am about 20 pounds heavier than I was when bf and I started dating. I am a stress eater and had a very stressful year last year due to a job that is now in the past. I started getting really down and asking bf if he still found me attractive, only want to have sex with the lights off, walked about in my yoga pants, etc. BF told me that he love me and thinks I am beautiful no matter what. I am still trying to lose that extra 20, but you have to remember that the right person loves YOU and not just your body.

[mysterons]

Thanks for your replies, everyone. I'm feeling a little more hopeful.

[doriswe]

Per my doctor, I should lose about 35 pounds....so I fall into the "overweight" category as well. Thing is, I've never had an issue meeting guys. I agree with everyone else who posted about confidence.

[naeljun]

I'm clearly in the minority here because I have some excess weight to lose and can't ever seem to to get anyone to ask me out. It could be because of the area I live in, but I have no idea. I wear a size 10 bottom but my upper body is larger than the bottom half. If I were to buy a dress it could be as big as a 16 depending on the dress so when you see me, you see the bigger side as opposed to my great legs and butt.

I think I am pretty confident and when I walk into a room, I walk in with my head held high. I just think that the area where I live, all the guys want is the 5'9" blonde hair, blue eyed, 36D, 24 in waist and 36 hips.

[pigeonmol]

May 19, 2012 22:09:26 GMT -5 naeljun said:

I'm clearly in the minority here because I have some excess weight to lose and can't ever seem to to get anyone to ask me out. It could be because of the area I live in, but I have no idea. I wear a size 10 bottom but my upper body is larger than the bottom half. If I were to buy a dress it could be as big as a 16 depending on the dress so when you see me, you see the bigger side as opposed to my great legs and butt.

I think I am pretty confident and when I walk into a room, I walk in with my head held high. I just think that the area where I live, all the guys want is the 5'9" blonde hair, blue eyed, 36D, 24 in waist and 36 hips.

You are not the only one. I have not had the best of luck. I have found a few guys, but because of my size (5'2" and over 200 pounds) they have not been winners. Don't get me wrong, I am dang sexy and I know it lol.