Monday randoms

[doglove]

How’s everyone doing today?

[chalupa]

OMG I'm beat. Basically - it feels like Monday.

I've been dealing with off/on neck and shoulder pain all summer, and I finally figured out that it's my own freaking mattress causing it. All the massages and chiropractor visits I've had, and I camped out at a horse show this weekend and realized it was the first night I hadn't woken up at 3 am in pain in months. Ugh! All it took was a camping mattress, lol. Anyhow, that leaves me shopping for a new mattress, and if we're going to get a new mattress, we might as well finally upgrade to a cal king bed so M's feet won't hang off the bed...so now I'm suddenly in the market for a mattress and either a new bed or a complete furniture set, because nothing is going to coordinate with my grandma's 1930's set that we have now (which is going to look lovely in the guest bedroom, once we decide what we want). Who needs to keep money in their bank account, am I right? I'm consoling myself with the thought of all the money I'll no longer need to spend in visits to fix the pain, plus sleeping through the night sounds delightful.

Also, we kicked ass at our horse show this weekend. I'm so thrilled with Owen and myself, and we're basically only home and unpacked long enough for me to wash everything and repack us for next weekend's competition.

[spindle92]

Hey momma, how are things going for you and baby?

I leave for Europe on Thursday. One moment I am totally fine and think I have all the time in the world and then the next I panic because I feel like I have so much to do before we leave.
I basically planned all our days activities for the 4 of us and I am starting to get nervous about everybody enjoying what I planned. In reality I know it will be fine as we are all really laid back people and go with the flow but the nerves are still in the back of my mind.

[spindle92]

oh and I am being shamed on a travel board because I am bringing more than just a carry on to europe for 2 weeks.
WTF, I am not backpacking thru europe I am going on a cruise. sorry but I do not want to wear the same pair of underwear daily.

[doglove]

Glad you finally figured it out chalupa.

[doglove]

Sept 9, 2019 9:39:00 GMT -5 spindle92 said:

Hey momma, how are things going for you and baby?

I leave for Europe on Thursday.

Yay have a great trip!

I am doing okay. The doctor found three tiny holes in the baby’s heart chamber on Friday during our anatomy scan. It could be the heart is not done developing, it could be VSD and odds are they will close on their own before birth, or the baby will need surgery to patch the holes after birth or it could be a genetic condition like Down syndrome. Nothing like stress! No other indicators of any genetic condition. We did blood work to rule out genetic conditions with heart defects and waiting on the results. We go back at the end of the month for another scan to see if the holes have closed on their own with full development of the heart.

Thank goodness for A, I don’t know how I would go through any of this pregnancy stuff and medical issues without him.

[doglove]

Sept 9, 2019 9:44:14 GMT -5 spindle92 said:

oh and I am being shamed on a travel board because I am bringing more than just a carry on to europe for 2 weeks.
WTF, I am not backpacking thru europe I am going on a cruise. sorry but I do not want to wear the same pair of underwear daily.

I brought a gigantic bag for our 10 day trip to Ireland. No regrets.

[tiramisu]

Sept 9, 2019 9:44:14 GMT -5 spindle92 said:

oh and I am being shamed on a travel board because I am bringing more than just a carry on to europe for 2 weeks.
WTF, I am not backpacking thru europe I am going on a cruise. sorry but I do not want to wear the same pair of underwear daily.

Have a fabulous trip!! And you know what? If you can lug it, take it! Who cares what random people think? You take what you know you need so you can enjoy yourself.

[tiramisu]

doglove fingers crossed for you and sending you love. That's tough to hear even though there's a chance of a good outcome. Sending you love.


chalupa congrats on kicking ass!! And on finally figuring out what's causing your back and neck pain.


My weekend was overall pretty restful. I had two private practice sessions, dance classes, the usual. I skipped some of my dance classes because I went to the chiropractor Thursday and he got my psoas to chill the fuck out and my hips back where they belonged, so I didn't want to screw it up with too much dancing and tap was hard enough. But from the three classes I did that say, it seems the fancy expensive socks meant to help cushion my foot and reduce injury helped. Yay for $25 socks?

I'm talking to some guys through Match. No dates planned yet, but with one we're working on it.

[kaneen]

doglove, sending good thoughts that everything will resolve with normal development.

spindle92, if you can handle the luggage, take it. Who has enough time on their hands to actually give a fluck about what someone else packs for a trip?!?!?!

I'm mad. My place is supposed to be done...well...now. It's not. A week and a half ago my contractor just casually tells me it won't be done until end of September. Um, hold up, what?!?! That's a full 4 weeks longer than he originally quoted me and stuck to right up until a week and a half ago. He tells me in that same conversation that he will put together a day by day schedule of activities so I will know what to expect. Um, yeah, been asking for that from the beginning. Well, it takes him 1.5 weeks to put together said schedule and it doesn't have this project finishing until 10/9. No, just no. I've gone over it in detail and am going to call him later today. If I'm not satisfied with the conversation, I'm escalating to his boss. He has zero track record of getting anything done by deadline so my thought is that if he does commit to finding a way to get this done by the end of the month that I STILL should expect it isn't done until 10/9. If he's saying 10/9, I likely need to expect at least a week more. My sanity will not stay in tact that long.

On a more fun note, I had a really fun shopping day with two of my girlfriends. We met up for brunch and then went to the fancy mall in the middle of the state. Afterward we shopped we met one of my friend's boyfriend for dinner closer to home. It was an all around fun day.

[gault]

I got my pathology report this morning, all abnormal tissue was taken out and the canal, the scary area, was negative for cancer. I go back in 3 months for another colposcopy to make sure, but it sounds like so far so good!

doglove hugs. The waiting must be so hard.

[spindle92]

doglove I will keep baby in my prayers. I am sure all will be fine but I understand the worrying.


1 carryon bag dude can go fuck himself as far as I am concerned. I travel how I want.

[chalupa]

spindle92 I don't understand why anyone cares how much somebody else packs for a trip. I happen to be a carryon-only person, and am constantly asked by friends what I'll do if I want options. Whatever. If I don't have to carry it, I hope you have every option you desire Especially on a cruise, where it's not like you're going to actually be packing up and moving your luggage from city to city. Have a great trip!

[downtoearth]

doglove, sending love for you and the baby. Hope that the holes are just slower development. Keep us posted.

[downtoearth]

The weekend was a whirlwind again... driving 3+ hours away on Friday to get to my oldest kid's bike race where didn't end up using the camping gear since it was raining when we arrived, so a cheap hotel it was. Then spending the day with amazing kids as they biked and enjoyed the moment in the mountains. Then heading to another town 2 hours away to see my sister in her play and visit my person and some friends, while my kiddos played with cousins. Then back to my town the next day to host a birthday party with an outdoor escape room adventure for my middle kiddo and 6 of his friends. It was really fun to be on another family adventure and even the hours in the car were spent listening to quiz show podcasts and trying to answer before each other or talking about the little things that my kids find important.

Now packing in as much work as possible today between family birthday breakfast muffins/chai and a family birthday dinner that I am hosting at my house with my kiddos, my parents, my former in-laws, my XH, and a lot of deep breaths. I know it shouldn't be hard to just act normal for 3 hours, but I find myself just not talking (or thinking, and luckily not saying, snarky comments) every time my XH says something - and I'm not sure if it feels "normal" for the kids. I'm a talker. I fell like I should get a badge for spending 4 hrs with him as the only other adult during the party yesterday, and not making any rude comments. I even asked about his weekend and life and said his girlfriend's name out loud. I hope that in a month or year these sorts of get-togethers for the kids are just easier on me. At least he hasn't wanted to bring his girlfriend to the kids family birthdays or events/races. That time will come soon enough.

That being said... having my person seems to make things better. When I'm with him, I don't think of XH hardly at all, but he knows a lot and gives me space and support to work through things without feeling judged or compared. It is probably b/c he is just an all around amazing, emotionally-connected, big-hearted (and super attractive) person. He surprises me more and more the with each moment I'm around him.

[tiramisu]

Hooray gault! That's great news!!

downtoearth I don't think you need to be quite so hung up on whether or not everything is normal for your kids in your behavior. Everything changed in your lives. They know that. You're not intentionally being a bitch to their father in front of them and controlling yourself from saying anything rude to or about him in front of them and that's the most important thing. You are a human and allowed to have human emotions, even in front of your kids. It's part of them learning that emotions don't have to be scary and we can have strong feelings and deal with them in a healthy way. So try not to stress over how you behave around XH too much.

spindle92 of course it was a dude.

[doglove]

Thank you everyone ❤️

[neonpink]

doglove, hugs, I hope everything is ok with babydoglove
gault,, glad you're ok
chalupa, at least you know why you hurt. time for a new mattress. I realized I'm sleeping on something too soft and it's hurting my lower back.

kaneen, That is infuriating. Did you get any resolution when you called the boss? I know they have you over a barrel since they are already in your house and it's demoed and under construction.

spindle92, Have an awesome time! I can't remember all the places you are going. Please eat all the pastries and drink the local beer for me. Also pack what you want. Some travel light some don't, just leave room for souvenirs!

downtoearth, hugs having to deal with your XH and being diplomatic has to be a huge challenge, It sounds like you are handling it with grace.

Now me. I'm exhausted. I have been suffering with a crappy cold for the last week. I'm finally feeling better. Except I think I gave it to my H who says he now feels bad. I did get a lot of netflixing in. Mindhunter is pretty good. I am so glad it's almost Friday again.

[Shreddingbetty]

Sept 9, 2019 9:44:14 GMT -5 spindle92 said:

oh and I am being shamed on a travel board because I am bringing more than just a carry on to europe for 2 weeks.
WTF, I am not backpacking thru europe I am going on a cruise. sorry but I do not want to wear the same pair of underwear daily.

Who cares how much you bring? That’s crazy self righteousness that they shame you for that. I take a full size suit case each for my kid and I and a carryon size backpack. I go for a month and I do laundry every week but you have to be prepared for different weather plus I always end up buying too much stuff there (books, chocolate, clothes, booze souvenirs....you know really important stuff). As long as you don’t care that you have to lug around your own luggage why would anyone else care? People are weird