Week before Thanksgiving randoms

[tiramisu]

How's everyone doing? I thought I'd just create a thread to dump all our thoughts and happenings in. What's new in your worlds?

[tiramisu]

If you all remember, I said I was going through some stuff. Apparently that was my time in a cocoon, because I'm doing a lot better. Less anxious about the guy I'm dating, more accepting of where things are and the reality that it can't and shouldn't be rushed.

I changed the curtains in my living room this weekend, which makes it easy easier to open them up and let in light. But I've been leaving them open even while I'm gone at work. This is honestly HUGE. Since junior year of college (so like late 2000), when I had a peeping tom and a borderline stalker *at the same time* I've always kept my windows VERY covered. Paranoid that someone might see me inside, alone, etc. I didn't even think about it, I just decided to leave for work yesterday with the curtains still open because the cats were enjoying lounging in the sun streaming in. I've also been leaving the blinds over my kitchen window at least partially up. Some of this is also because of my reorganization, but it's like this weight has just been lifted and I don't feel that fear anymore.

I also went to check out a church (technically a cathedral) on Sunday and one of my friends came with me. I really liked it. Everyone was warm and welcoming and friendly. The sermon was delivered by a woman, who is the dean and preacher. They invited everyone to take communion, regardless of where you are in your faith journey. They brought up transgender day of visibility and had a speaker after the service for any who wanted to stay for him. I'm going back next Sunday. Which feels weird to say, but also nice.

[bullygirl979]

OMG, my kitchen is almost doneeeeeeeeeee. I'm so excited to have my house back to "normal". I'm also off Friday and all next week and I cannot wait! I'm so burned out from work.

[doglove]

Reality is setting in that I will soon be a mom. 😨 I am not sure I am prepared for how different things will be, but I hope for the better. I am slowing down and feeling tired all the time these days. Especially with back issues now. I am always doing all the things and now it’s getting hard to just do regular stuff like change the sheets on the bed or take my socks off. 😳 I am glad A has been picking up the slack and I’ve realized that it is okay to slow down. I’ve also realized how messed up my last marriage was and how I have held onto a lot of things afraid to move forward from it until I now see how different A is than that man. I think maybe it’s just taken a lot of stressful situations to see how differently A acts and reacts to them to realize I am in such a better marriage now and am finally starting to trust that!

I am looking forward to some time off for the holidays. We are volunteering for a 5k next week and hope my back cooperates enough for me to walk it or some distance of it with Rusty.

[kaneen]

I’m so excited for you bullygirl979! I KNOW how you are feeling and I know I’ve said this before but trust me, it’ll be worth it in the end. Will you share pics?? Pretty please!

tiramisu, That sounds super liberating! Just don’t leave anything valuable in sight when you aren’t home and your curtains are open. When I had my break in, the police told me that criminals often look in to see if there’s anything valuable laying around and if they see stuff but no one home they are more emboldened to break in.

doglove, hang in there! You know I don’t have kids but everyone always says you can never really be ready completely. I know you and A will figure it out and be great parents!

[doriswe]

DD text that she's decided not to come home for Thanksgiving with no real explanation why. While my feelings are a little hurt by this, I'm not saying anything to her about it. DS and I can go to her Friday/Saturday next week to hang out, even though she's working both days. She's an adult and if she doesn't want to come home, she doesn't want to come home. I'm going to miss going out shopping with her late on Thanksgiving, to make fun of people, but things change, right?

I'm having a hard time focusing at work, so I've spent way too much time with crappy TV and chatting with coworkers. But I am caught up, so I'm not neglecting things.

I did 95 minutes at my yoga studio this morning (45 hot flow and 50 minute buti) and I feel soooooo strong!

R booked a last minute trip to Nashville, so we're flying out Friday and coming back Sunday. I'm really looking forward to time away because it's been all doom and gloom lately.

tiramisu, sounds like a lot of healthy growth! yay!
doglove, no one is every really prepared to be a mom...and if they tell you they are, they lie! None of us know what we're doing and we're all doing our best. And that doesn't ever really go away...I'm 20 years in and there are days I'm all "damn, I'm the best mom EVA" and then a minute later I'm all "wtf am I even doing?"

[kaneen]

I’m in California this week. I was dreading the trip. Didn’t want to be gone after just finally moving back in. It’s been pretty good so far though. I randomly made a new friend in the Skyclub in Atlanta who lives in my town. I ran into some old work friends in the bar at the hotel last night. I got in a good, solid workout without my trainer (something I’ve been struggling with since I started working out regularly again) and yesterday was quite productive at work.

I’m taking Friday off and going to a charity ball Friday night. It’s a full on ball, as in, wearing a gown with a train. I’m super excited about it. I mean, when (besides your wedding) does a woman get to rock a train?!?!

I have GOT to make more progress on my place this weekend and get my Thanksgiving shopping done. I’m hosting 20-25 people for the holiday. 😳

[spindle92]

I am ready to throw something, anything.

Today is my day off and I still got up extra early so I could work on my vacation picture album/book thingy. I spent a good 90 minutes on it and then received a "server error" message. No big deal, so maybe the last few minutes of work didn't save.
NOPE - not one damn thing I did this AM saved. GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

Would it be wrong to start drinking at 10:45AM?

[spindle92]

kaneen - I finally got on my computer so I could look at your photos instead of just small pics on my phone.
OMG everything is gorgeous!

[gault]

Hola.

Last week was... rough. Very frustrating at work right now. Bf and i went to our favorite date night place on Friday and it was just what was needed. It was that giddy "I'm so in love with this person" feeling the entire night, which is just lovely. At least two strangers asked if we were married and that we looked so happy together. I mean, how sweet is that.

In the last few weeks we've had the very casual "would you ever want to get married" convo. Eeeeeee!

Thanksgiving will be spent at my aunt's nursing home, then to bf's family house after. My brother's in-laws will also be there. They are on the surface, nice people- but also very conservative and snobby. His father in law also said some really gross comments about transgender people in the spring and I decided that they are no longer worth paying attention to.

[kaneen]

Nov 19, 2019 11:54:59 GMT -5 spindle92 said:

kaneen - I finally got on my computer so I could look at your photos instead of just small pics on my phone.
OMG everything is gorgeous!

THANK YOU!!

[tiramisu]

kaneen excuse me ma'am, where are you this week?

[kaneen]

Nov 19, 2019 15:56:47 GMT -5 tiramisu said:

kaneen excuse me ma'am, where are you this week?

Dood.  You know if I was anywhere near you I'd let you know!  I'm in the Bay Area.

[tiramisu]

Nov 19, 2019 16:05:30 GMT -5 kaneen said:

Nov 19, 2019 15:56:47 GMT -5 tiramisu said:

kaneen excuse me ma'am, where are you this week?

Dood.  You know if I was anywhere near you I'd let you know!  I'm in the Bay Area.

I know, I like to tease

Enjoy the area!

[downtoearth]

tiramisu , so good to hear about the funk lifting and good things coming around the bend for you.

kaneen , really liked your pictures of the renovation. You live on the ocean and now your house is so airy and bright!

doriswe , sorry your DD isn't coming home, but I'm glad that you get away this weekend and get to see her after T-day.


I think I am in a bit of a funk - I go from so upset that my work is boring to avoiding work when I have it. I really need to focus on what I want my career to look like and what my career goals are. I am going to work on that tonight and see what I can decide. I have been doing the same thing for about 17 years and I think I might need a change in my career goals or plans - or my entire career.


ETA: I'm also thinking less about holidays this year. I think that's understandable after the year of changes I have had and I'm sure I'll get back to liking Thanksgiving and Christmas again in the future, but I'm taking most of the pressure off myself and may just see what minimum I can get away with the kids instead of trying to keep up all the traditions this year. I hope they'll forgive me this year, but honestly I don't think they'll notice or mind if I just relax a little - like half the ornaments on the tree and no added decorations, except maybe outside lights. Plus I just don't know if I have it in me to have a huge Christmas Eve with friends this year... might just be me and the kids and my one good friend. 

[chalupa]

I'm here. Still haven't given my notice at my current job, and every hour is killing me not-so-slowly. I've accepted the verbal offer from my new manager, and we're just waiting for that HR team to get their asses in gear and get me an official offer so I can accept it already (and then give my notice). I think my first day is going to be Dec 6th or 9th. I can't.freaking.wait.

Other than that, I'm just trying to manage stress as best I can. I have a doctors appointment on Monday, because I haven't slept in months. Seriously - months. It started in April when I had my neck spasm, and I kept waking up in pain throughout the night. Well, it's now November and I don't hurt anymore (yay physical therapy!), but my body never reset when it comes to sleep - I average about 5 hours per night Maybe quitting will be the lucky charm that gets me back to sleeping? Otherwise, my dr better have some brilliant ideas.

My poor horse is still rocking his torn ligament. I've called in a claim to his medical insurance, so we're going to step it up to the costly treatments, because it's been 8 weeks of waiting for the poor guy to feel better. I am so thankful I have an insurance policy on him, because I'm going to do anything up to and including surgery to get him better (we're clearly going to start with electromagnetic therapy and PRP first, though!).

It's opening weekend for our local ski resorts, so M and I are definitely going to go hit the slopes on Saturday and/or Sunday.

And I guess I need to go shopping for thanksgiving ingredients this weekend. I am only responsible for 2 sides this year, so it shouldn't be too bad.

[tiramisu]

chalupa I really hope you get the written offer soon so you can put in your notice. Fingers crossed that the job change will also help with your sleep.


I've updated some people, but not all. The guy I was dating ended things last night. Boils down to "it's not me, it's him, I'm amazing and our connection is magic, but he's not sure magic is enough." Heavy blame being laid on differences of faith (he's a lifelong churchgoer, I just started going). I'm doing a little better, not crying at the moment, but I expect it's going to take me a few days at least to process through all of this because it does really hurt. I'm trying to not let myself go back to the place of "why does it seem like everyone else gets a relationship but me?" because I know that's not actually true. But it's all hard, of course.

[doglove]

Hugs tiramisu. I’m sorry. 😞

[tiramisu]

Nov 21, 2019 20:10:47 GMT -5 doglove said:

Hugs tiramisu. I’m sorry. 😞

Thank you.

[kaneen]

Nov 21, 2019 15:09:59 GMT -5 tiramisu said:

chalupa I really hope you get the written offer soon so you can put in your notice. Fingers crossed that the job change will also help with your sleep.


I've updated some people, but not all. The guy I was dating ended things last night. Boils down to "it's not me, it's him, I'm amazing and our connection is magic, but he's not sure magic is enough." Heavy blame being laid on differences of faith (he's a lifelong churchgoer, I just started going). I'm doing a little better, not crying at the moment, but I expect it's going to take me a few days at least to process through all of this because it does really hurt. I'm trying to not let myself go back to the place of "why does it seem like everyone else gets a relationship but me?" because I know that's not actually true. But it's all hard, of course.

Hi pretty lady.  Please reach out if you want to talk.  You helped me more than you know through my break up. Least I can do is return the favor.

Also, I get the “why everyone else does not me?”  In your head you know it’s not true but that’s what the heart feels when this happens.  Just know that the relationship for you will make it’s way to you.  It will.

[tiramisu]

Nov 21, 2019 21:26:10 GMT -5 kaneen said:

Nov 21, 2019 15:09:59 GMT -5 tiramisu said:

chalupa I really hope you get the written offer soon so you can put in your notice. Fingers crossed that the job change will also help with your sleep.


I've updated some people, but not all. The guy I was dating ended things last night. Boils down to "it's not me, it's him, I'm amazing and our connection is magic, but he's not sure magic is enough." Heavy blame being laid on differences of faith (he's a lifelong churchgoer, I just started going). I'm doing a little better, not crying at the moment, but I expect it's going to take me a few days at least to process through all of this because it does really hurt. I'm trying to not let myself go back to the place of "why does it seem like everyone else gets a relationship but me?" because I know that's not actually true. But it's all hard, of course.

Hi pretty lady.  Please reach out if you want to talk.  You helped me more than you know through my break up. Least I can do is return the favor.

Also, I get the “why everyone else does not me?”  In your head you know it’s not true but that’s what the heart feels when this happens.  Just know that the relationship for you will make it’s way to you.  It will.

Thank you so much, it means a lot. I will, absolutely.

[chalupa]

Friday feelings:

I kicked ass at my 6:30 barre class this morning. I've been going for about a month, and I've admired how muscled all those teeny tiny girls are. I haven't turned teeny tiny (LOL, that's just not my build at all), but this morning, my shoulders and quads were somehow suddenly super defined. I turned to the mirror to check my form and went "OMG, muscles!".

And I got home to FINALLY MY OFFER LETTER. It's signed, returned, and my start date is Dec 9th. I then had to call my current boss, who has had a terrible week, and break the news. Her reaction was hysterical laughter, then a sigh. My boss and my team is the ONLY thing I will miss about my current job, and I will miss them all terribly. The rest of it is all bullshit, so - see you never!

And now I'm typing up my resignation letter and making a long list of in-flight projects for a transition plan. When I add it up, there is no wonder everyone around me is ready to quit - I'm carrying the load of at least 3 employees, and we are all that slammed.

And on top of it, that new barre workout I've suddenly become addicted to - a studio is opening 7 minutes from my new office location the 1st week of December. How awesome is it that I can keep doing my early morning workouts and then go straight in to the office? They have a 6am class, so getting there so early means I will miss all the (bad!) commuter traffic that is involved in getting to that new office location.

[chalupa]

And many, many hugs to you tiramisu. Vent away any time you need.

[doriswe]

Happy Friday y’all! I’m Nashville bound this afternoon. I’m sooooo freaking ready to be responsible free for a minute. I’m feeling kinda blah about Christmas this year since both kids are so “ehhh” about gifts and would rather have cash.

[idahome]

So glad it’s Friday. It’s been a long week full of “I need it now” from all corners of my organization.

I’m rearranging my desk this afternoon. After that I’m going to work on an outline of how I want to transition my last few HR things to the new HR Director so we can start on that next week.

I’m looking forward to going to the grocery store by myself to get the Thanksgiving food items. Other then that I’m really hoping for a quiet weekend.

[spindle92]

chalupa - WOOOO HOOOO CONGRATS!!!!!

tiramisu - be kind to yourself and know you deserve more than what this person was able to give you.