Plan for winding down nursing/pumping

[Susie]

My weekday nursing/pumping schedule over the "long haul" of DS's first year has been:

 7:30am:  Nurse DS at wake up, usually "1.5 side" (one full overnight boob + part of the other).
10:00am:  Pump at work - 6-8 oz.
  2:00pm:  Pump at work - 4-6 oz.
  7:00pm:  Nurse at DS's bedtime, both sides.
11:00pm:  Pump before bed - 4-6 oz.

I need all 3 pumps in order to hit the 16 oz. per day that he takes to daycare Mon-Fri.  On the weekends and days off when we're together, I nurse all day (he probably gets less than his daycare 16 oz.), and I pump at 11pm.  The 8-12 oz. I get on Sat+Sun nights covers any midweek shortages, and adds to my stash.  I currently have 400 some oz. in the freezer.

DS is now 8.5 months.  With the stash that I have, and the fact that he eats ricotta cheese and greek yogurt without GI issues, we should be on track to introduce WCM in 3 months or so, and for me to stop pumping by his June 1 birthday.  After that I plan to nurse when we're together for as long as that lasts.  Step 1 is to drop one of my 3 pumps per day.  But which one?

Dropping the 11pm pump would be a huge quality of life improvement for me.  I would either get more sleep, because I habitually only start pumping when I finish all the adulting that needs to be done, and then wind up staying up too late, or I'd use the extra time to get a little exercise (even if it's just walking in the evening).  I am not currently fitting that in.  It would mean I would not have to bring all the pumping paraphernalia when I travel with DS.  It would lower milk production at a time of day that isn't really useful for DS because he's sleeping.

However, it would mean that instead of pumping throughout 16 hrs. of the day and then going 8 hours overnight, I'd be trying to go 12 hours overnight and keep up supply as much as possible during the other 12 hrs.  I am afraid I'd lose more than the 11pm 4-6 oz due to diminished production overall.  Consolidating to a single 12:00pm pump at work as the first step seems like the more gradual option (and is what I did with DD).  This would mean my milk production would be pretty out of sync (time of day wise) with DS's nursing when we're together though, which seems somewhat unproductive.

Especially for nursing moms whose babies STTN, how did you/would you approach this?

[lovelyshoes]

I have not done this, so take my advice for what’s its worth. I have been reading up on it and it seems like it’s best to adjust the times you pump by an hour at a time before dropping a session. I don’t know which you would just drop if you leave them as is. Maybe move back your morning pump so you can end up eliminating the mid-day pump.

[pooh8402]

Referencing E1 here, since I was working then.

I dropped my before bed pump first. I wasn't getting that much and sleep was more important to me (but E1 was also waking 2x a night at that age). But even with my oversupply, I didn't start dropping pumps until at least 9 months. When my supply had dropped enough that I was no longer making enough for the next day, that's when I pulled from the freezer to make up the shortfall (I think it took me a month to drop my supply that much). When I started working on my work pumps, I spaced them out first (so instead of every 4 hours, I went to every 5 hours), and shortened the session, rather than dropping a pump cold turkey.

You have 400 oz now. At 16 oz a day, you have 25 days of milk saved, or 5 weeks. I think you have plenty and can drop the night pump soon.

[icedcoffee]

You're not going to like my advice, but....When I started dropping pumping sessions my milk supply really dropped. I would not start dropping pump sessions until closer to 11 months. You do have a nice freezer supply, but it goes quick once you start dipping into it.

Also--I skipped my bedtime pump this weekend while travelling and I'm really paying for it now with decreased supply.

Once you are a bit closer to 11 months I'd probably combine your 10 am and 2 pm pumps to noon. The next one I'd drop after that would be your bedtime pump.

I gotta say, I'm jealous you can get that much in just 3 pumps. I pump 5 times a day and nurse once a day.

[Susie]

Feb 18, 2020 12:35:43 GMT -5 pooh8402 said:

When I started working on my work pumps, I spaced them out first (so instead of every 4 hours, I went to every 5 hours), and shortened the session, rather than dropping a pump cold turkey.

Yeah, I wasn't thinking of going cold turkey.  I skipped the bedtime pump once (I was sick, had a fever, and just wanted my bed at 9pm, and couldn't bring myself to pump first), and even with less milk because of whatever virus I was fighting, I was exploding by morning.

I can't space them much more because his bedtime is his bedtime, and I'm not staying up later just to stretch the time on pumping.  But I can start dropping the 11pm pump from 30 mins to 20 to 10... if that's the pump I decide to work on first.  He'd be 9m by the time I dropped it entirely.

[icedcoffee]

Feb 18, 2020 12:45:52 GMT -5 Susie said:

Feb 18, 2020 12:35:43 GMT -5 pooh8402 said:

When I started working on my work pumps, I spaced them out first (so instead of every 4 hours, I went to every 5 hours), and shortened the session, rather than dropping a pump cold turkey.

Yeah, I wasn't thinking of going cold turkey.  I skipped the bedtime pump once (I was sick, had a fever, and just wanted my bed at 9pm, and couldn't bring myself to pump first), and even with less milk because of whatever virus I was fighting, I was exploding by morning.

I can't space them much more because his bedtime is his bedtime, and I'm not staying up later just to stretch the time on pumping.  But I can start dropping the 11pm pump from 30 mins to 20 to 10... if that's the pump I decide to work on first.  He'd be 9m by the time I dropped it entirely.

Oh if you're pumping for 30 minutes before bed I'd definitely cut that down.  I pump for 10 before bed.  If you don't pump before bed and then wake up exploding you may have to start pumping in the morning otherwise your body will just start to produce less milk within a couple weeks.  You know?

[Susie]

icedcoffee , you're right, I don't like that, but you're not wrong. I dropped to 1x/day at work with DD, and then just morning, night, and 11pm. My period came back somewhere in there and it all went downhill from there. This is such a hard balance. I am dying to stop that 11pm pump, and find a way to fit in exercise. I can't make it work time wise with both 1/2 hr pumping + kid bedtimes + any time for myself, and I also can't make AM workouts fit with the overnight full boobs. But I also don't want to inadvertently wind this down sooner than we're ready. Last babyyyyyyy and all that. I feel so strongly pulled in both directions at the same time.

ETA:  Maybe I should put this on hold until spring comes.  When it's warm, DS is pretty amenable to stroller runs.  I may feel better about keeping up pumping if I can do a 6pm stroller run with him.  That just feels so far off (it's so cold out and I'm so over it).

[icedcoffee]

Susie, I feel you. Pumping is the pits and life while lactating is really insane. My boobs get in the way of a lot of things. I just vividly remember the last 2-3 months how I was barely getting by with enough milk and it gave me anxiety. With that said...there's always formula to top him off if you do start to run low. You're worth it too to have time for yourself.

[icedcoffee]

My H suggested we go skiing and I had to say no because the thought of needing to find a place to pump midday was too much to handle.

[Mrs.flang]

I really understand your desire to drop the 11pm pump.  I never pumped at home, but those extra weekend ounces sound great!

My supply also took a real dive when I started reducing and eliminating daytime sessions and I ended up running out of freezer supply a touch earlier than 11.5 months which is when I planned on introducing WCM and getting off the pump completely.  It caused a lot of stress because daycare wasn't really used to not having bottles, she didn't really love WCM (at least not as much as DD1 did) and I wasn't sure if it was worth it to start on formula when we were so close to 12 months.

I did just want to say I would be less concerned about the daytime pumps being out of sync with regular nursing.  IME that hasn't been an issue at all, although IIRC, your DD self weaned a little earlier than you really wanted, so maybe that is causing hesitation?

Either way, for now I'd probably start to cutting back on the 11pm session to 20 or 15 minutes.  That wouldn't be enough of a change to add workouts back in, but maybe you can at least get more sleep that way!

[Susie]

Feb 18, 2020 12:57:52 GMT -5 icedcoffee said:

My H suggested we go skiing and I had to say no because the thought of needing to find a place to pump midday was too much to handle.

Yes!  H suggested an anniversary overnight trip next month and as nice as it sounds, everything he proposed I had to sit there and work out a pumping time/location schedule and it stopped feeling worth it.  I'd rather just save up the IL childcare "points" for after I'm done pumping and can enjoy it like a regular free human.

[isabel]

Feb 18, 2020 12:40:41 GMT -5 icedcoffee said:

You're not going to like my advice, but....When I started dropping pumping sessions my milk supply really dropped. I would not start dropping pump sessions until closer to 11 months. You do have a nice freezer supply, but it goes quick once you start dipping into it.

Same. As soon as I slowed my pumping, my supply dropped drastically. There was nothing gradual about it, honestly. And both of my kids gave up nursing at that time because they didn't like having to work for their milk (I had overactive letdown with both). I wouldn't start dropping pumping sessions until you're prepared to stop entirely. Of course, your situation could be different.

[waverly]

I didn't drop pumping session until 10-11 months. I pumped during my commute at 8am, and at work at 10 am and 2pm. I did not pump at 11pm.

So starting at 10.5 months I dropped the commute pump. At 11 months I consolidated the 10 and 2 pump into a 12pm pump. At 11.5 months I stopped pumping. I had a week long freezer stash, and we started WCM at 11.5 months or maybe 11 months 3 weeks.

I continued to nurse morning, after work, before bed, and middle of the night. I night weaned at 12 months, and continued to nurse the 3 times a day. It didn't matter that I nursed 5 times a day on the weekend because it had been a year of nursing. I completely weaned at 14 months- would have been earlier but she protested a lot.

[waverly]

I know its a time suck, and I would totally hate the 11 pm pump. Maybe you can do more on the weekends to cover some of those ounces. But, it is only 2 more months. And it is so nice to be off the pump and just nursing the baby. It's great. If you never got to the point before, and it is your last baby I would say just stick it out 2 more months ish, or even 1.5 months then start lowering the minutes. If you have experienced it before then you don't have to do it, of course.

[SusanBAnthony]

Is you H also staying up until 11 to adult?

I'd start moving the night pump earlier until it's up against his bedtime, and then stop it. And as you get closer to his bedtime, shorten it, because you shouldn't have much to pump anyway.

[icedcoffee]

Feb 18, 2020 19:44:42 GMT -5 melmaria said:

Feb 18, 2020 12:57:52 GMT -5 icedcoffee said:

My H suggested we go skiing and I had to say no because the thought of needing to find a place to pump midday was too much to handle.

I went skiing today and pumped twice in the car in the parking lot. Between that and the huge (unrelated) fight I had with H, I’m so pissed I wasted the day off work/money/time. Ugh. This whole shitshow of a day may have been enough to make me quit pumping early.

(Sorry for the threadjack, Susie. I am also dying to drop my before-bed pump and get sleep again).

I’m sorry. That does sound shitty and I’d be upset too. ☹️

[Susie]

Feb 18, 2020 19:21:34 GMT -5 SusanBAnthony said:

Is you H also staying up until 11 to adult?

I'd start moving the night pump earlier until it's up against his bedtime, and then stop it. And as you get closer to his bedtime, shorten it, because you shouldn't have much to pump anyway.

He stays up with me.  Most nights he sits on the couch and flips through job listings, applies to any that are interesting, and watches shows on Netflix that I'm not interested in.  (His agency does not have an opening for the next promotion step for him so he is looking for one that does.)  Meanwhile I pay bills, do laundry, prep daycare bottles, buy birthday gifts, all that stuff.  Then we watch something mindless while I pump.

I'm just so tired of starting the pump when it's already time I want to go to bed  Sigh

Yesterday when I said I had about 400 oz., I was guesstimating from memory.  I was way off.  I counted last night and between the fridge and freezer I had 780 oz.  I wish there was a happy medium where I could pump less often, make less milk, and not lose my supply entirely.  There is no need to have 780 oz., ever.  But I am worried that isabel's point is probably true.  My supply dropped off pretty fast when I scaled back my pumping for DD.  

With DD, I stopped pumping at 12m, she weaned at 13.5m, and she was still drinking BM bottles/sippies from the freezer at 18m because I wasn't about to throw away all my hard work.  I think at my high point I had >1000 oz. for her in the freezer.  I swore up and down that I was not going to put the strain on my body of producing so much extra, unneeded milk for DS, but here I am.  I could pump for fewer minutes, and when I'm ready to drop a pump I'll do that to ease into it.  But pumping for fewer minutes doesn't improve my quality of life much, it's like as long as I'm here I might as well finish the episode of Schitt's Creek.  It's the setting up, putting cold flanges from the fridge on when I'm already freezing all the time in winter.

I think I just really, really need spring.  Maybe that will help everything seem more tolerable.

[icedcoffee]

Oh with that much milk in the freezer I'd definitely cut down the time. I know you say it doesn't make much of a difference, but it's still an extra 10-15 minutes. My before bed pump is literally just 10 minutes. Then I throw everything in the dishwasher and go to bed.

I hate the cold flanges. :::shivers:::

[lovelyshoes]

Susie any way your h can get some of that prep work done? I’m sure this is not a novel idea and I do all that prep myself. I have given a bunch of tasks to my h that are solely his now to lighten my load. It’s really hard and that evening pump is always such a chore. I usually say I’ll only pump for 10 minutes, but end up doing a full pump too.
My goal was also a year and I have almost nothing in the freezer (always just trying to keep up), so I have decided to just go one week at a time to make it easier on my mental state. My supply took a hit when I got really sick in December and I had to give myself some grace. I think in your case spacing out the day pumps might make it a lot easier on you.
You’re almost there and once Spring gets here it will be easier. ❤️
PS thank you for the tj mixed nut butter recommendation. I got it last week and my son seems to like it mixed in with yogurt.

[SusanBAnthony]

My second kid self-weaned at 7 months, and with my first I had thousands of ounces in the freezer. It honestly wasn't the end of the world. If you are feeling done, I vote quit the 11 pm pump and don't worry about it.

Also have you H help more at night, sorta looking for a job is not a good reason.

[pooh8402]

I agree with that much milk, you may as well drop the evening pump. Or maybe move it to 10pm and 15 min for now.

[pandorica]

I've never done this before, but with that much milk it seems like you could definitely start cutting down on pumping time at least, if not cut one out completely.

After reading about people losing their supply after cutting out a pumping session I guess I have to keep going for a little longer than I expected. DD is 11 months next week but I only have 80-100 oz in the freezer and I'm barely keeping up as is. That freezer stash you have is impressive!

[waverly]

With 780 ounce in the freezer, I think you are OK with lowering your minutes perhaps starting at 9 months old? I would move the pumping time to 10pm, and go from 30 minutes to 20 for a week, then 20 to 10 for a week then 10 to maybe 5 for a week and be done by 10 months.

I agree with having your DH do some of the evening stuff. We do laundry on the weekend which isn't ideal always, but frees up your evening. We have a lot of things on automatic bill pay. I buy birthday presents off Amazon on my lunchtime at work. So I kind of feel like you could skip all that stuff except prep bottles at least for a little while- move some of it to the weekend until you totally get rid of that pump which seems likely in the next 2 months. Your H can prep bottles and you get that pump time earlier until you are weaned from that late evening pump.

[Susie]

As far as the evening stuff is concerned, yeah... I mean I can optimize until the cows come home but it seems like there is always something.  

Laundry - I usually do 3-4 loads on the weekend.  But if we travel on the weekend (e.g. we just spent this past one at my dad's), then I end up doing a load every night for 2-3 week nights before and 2-3 week nights after.  Or if DD gets paint on her clothes, or DS has a spit-up-y day, or he blows out a couple diaper(s) because he's teething and that's life, then there's more weeknight laundry.  H will sometimes fold it while I pump.

Bills - I have a million things on auto pay also, but I still have to check the checking account spreadsheet to make sure the FSA expenses and daycare tuition are submitted for reimbursement, everything's clearing, the statements get downloaded, all that.  I do it when I have time, usually in large batches. 

H makes dinner, packs lunches (except DS's bottle bag which I do), and I nudge him to clean up the kitchen after all that as well, load and unload the dishwasher, etc.  In our house it's less of "the person who cooks doesn't clean up," it's more of a "the kitchen is his kingdom and responsibility."  This works for us.

I do a lot of "homing from work" as well, managing Amazon subscribe & save, ordering gifts, etc., but not all of it.  And sometimes work bleeds into my evenings and that's the thing keeping me up.

Kid bedtimes - usually I do DS and he does DD.  She is up later/takes longer.  

There's no one magic solution, unfortunately.  I think overall we're doing a decent job of sharing the load.  This is just a really hands-on demanding period of our lives, with kids who are <1 and 4.

[tacom]

You have a killer freezer stash and good pumping output which makes me think your supply should be able to handle a bit of flexibility.

I personally would drop that 11pm pump and closely monitor my output for the remaining pumps. If your supply dips for other pumps too, you can always try to add the 11pm session back in with some power pumping and extra hydration etc. if you’re not devastated by the idea of dipping into your stash, it’s time to get more sleep!

[gt7301b]

I'd drop the late night pumping session and see what happens. You have a giant stash in the freezer, so even if your supply does drop you can dip into the stash and get through the next couple months. It would be worth it to me to get the extra sleep/ be able to workout.  He is 8.5 months, even if your supply does start to drop he will soon be adding in more foods and cow's milk so you should be fine and you have several months of supply built up.