Welcome to the Anarchist Jurisdiction!

[smock]

So Seattle is now an "anarchist jurisdiction," according to the DOJ: www.justice.gov/opa/pr/department-justice-identifies-new-york-city-portland-and-seattle-jurisdictions-permitting

It's about time! I spent the weekend barricading my doors against the "anarchists and activists" roaming the streets of Seattle, hell-bent on imposing their liberal agenda. It was dark days, with the smoke from their tree-burning ceremonies choking the air. Thankfully, our local Starbucks started handing out a machete with every venti or larger pumpkin spice latte, so at least we'll be able to protect ourselves. 

How are you doing in the anarchist jurisdiction?

[Nonny]

I hear people are handing off the little parking meter receipts to others when there's still time left on the tag, rather than making their fellow man pay for a full hour when all they need to do is pop inside the weed store for 10 minutes.

[BlondeSpiders]

It's been crazy up here in North Seattle. On Facebook, our neighborhood-specific looter's page is absolutely lit up with demands and offerings. Just yesterday I had random strangers come up to my front door and and seize items I'd left outside. Hiding their identity with masks, of course.

I don't know how much longer I'll last in this hellhole.