Bar Mitzvah gift question

[countthestars]

We attended a Zoom Bar Mitzvah this morning and the invitation suggested donating a coat and/or money to his coat drive in lieu of gifts. We have always given money so we’re feeling weird not sending money. WWYD? One of us thinks we should send a card only with a note about donating to the coat drive; the other thinks we should send both a check and a donation.

[ohgillian]

Don't send a gift if they asked for something in lieu of gifts. The card with note is great.

[cricketwife]

If you know them well, I’d send the donation note and the money.

[purplepenguin7]

Bar Mitzvah gifts are usually given in $18 increments. If it’s within your means, I would donate a coat and send an $18 or $36 dollar check with note that you made a donation. If not, I think a donation alone is perfectly fine since that is what they asked for.

[goldengirlz]

I think it’s fine to only send a donation (more than fine even!)

[scm1011]

Dec 12, 2020 16:05:59 GMT -5 ohgillian said:

Don't send a gift if they asked for something in lieu of gifts. The card with note is great.

Agreed, 100%

[icedcoffee]

Card with a note that you made a donation.