Monday... yuck.

[k3am]

Womp womp.



I finally caught up with my old boss/mentor yesterday. It was.. nice to catch up, but left me feeling melancholy about everything. He did agree that the local competitor that would be really easy to transition to (he moved to that company after our prior company together) would be a very bad fit for me culturewise and based on my priorities in life. But he also was reassuring that my thought that even if they do decide to shit can my division they'd keep me on to wind it down was probably how it would play out.



Tomorrow is DD's MRI. Everytime we do it, it's different requirements and it makes it really hard to prep her for it. In their infinite wisdom, they decided that starting last year, sedated MRI's are not an option. This is not a requirement everywhere, just at our provider. The first one was a complete failure and we had to reschedule. For the second, her pediatrician gave us a prescription for versed, and it went much more smoothly - she slept through the whole thing and doesn't remember getting the IV because versed has a side effect of amnesia. This time we asked for the same prescription, but apparently that's not an option, so we've got a valium for her. But since we've never had valium (and I've never taken it myself), I can't tell her how it will make her feel, if it will help with her anxiety over the IV, etc.), and she's nervous going into it, which makes me nervous going into it. And because of covid protocols, they only allow one parent, so DH won't be able to help hold her down... and the whole reason she has so much fear about the MRI is because she has so many memories of 4-5 strangers holding her down to place the IV everytime..

[186momx]

k3am, I hope the drugs help DD tomorrow and it doesn't turn into a disaster. I don't get why her neuro or pedi can't come up with a plan that is the same each time. The girls has a huge fear it isn't going to get better as she gets older and she is going to need an MRI more often than not.

DD is not with me for the next 3 days. The office seems so quiet without zoom calls in the background or DD going "mom".

Monday open letter
Dear Clients
Just because the government gave us another 30 days doesn't mean you should procrastinate 30 more days on turning in your taxes.
Tax lady who's intake volume has gone from crazy to ghosted

[xctsclrx]

186momx, So my H and I do taxes litteraly as soon as we get all of our documents. I don't understand this procrastination thing. We usually own anywhere between $100-500 or we get back tht much.

yay monday? I don't know. This week is oging to be weird. I have a doc appt. about my chronic ear infection Friday and I really hope I get some answers.

[twinmomma]

xctsclrx, I'm the same way! I want to just get taxes done and out of the way as soon as possible! It doesn't change the outcome if you wait longer.

k3am, That is so frustrating! I don't understand why her chart doesn't specify that she needs these accomodations. None of it seems outlandish at all. The poor kid. I hope the meds help her tomorrow and that it's not too bad an ordeal for all of you. Good luck!

I spent my whole morning fighting with insurance. I've decided to move forward with getting DD2 evaluated for ADHD/executive functioning issues. Last time we did this she was 6 and the school district blew us off. Her dad was also useless at the time and didn't provide me any back up or support so I kind of gave up. I just had too much other more pressing stuff to deal with. This time around, I'm going with a private eval, but getting insurance to commit to covering it has been a nightmare! I spent 3 hours on the phone, talked to a bunch of different people, and I'm still not sure if it's going to cost me a $15 copay or a $5,000 out of pocket cost. I finally tapped HR to help me navigate it all. I'm feeling kind of alone in the whole process. ExH doesn't think it's necessary but agreed to do it and not fight it. Beau is trying to convince me that she has so many other positive qualities, why focus on the bad. Meanwhile, my poor kid can't get out of her own way and is getting frustrated with herself and I'm frustrated with it all.

[xctsclrx]

twinmomma, it's not focusing on the bad. It's getting tools for her toolbox to overcome physical obstacles that she has no control over.

If she was hard of hearing you'd get her an hearing aid and maybe sign language.

Glasses for sight issues

Prosthetic if she was missing limb.

That's how I would approach to ex h and beau. Guys process differently than women.

[polecat8]

It was a beautiful weekend here. The kids were outside most of the time.
Yesterday, we had a small family party at our house for DS2's birthday. It was good to see my parents and brothers.

twinmomma, have you tried going through your DD2's pediatrician? When my DD was having issues in school (not completing work, easily sidetracked, frustrated at some tasks, but great at others), we talked to her pedi who was able to give us surveys to give to her teachers. The teachers mailed the surveys directly back to the pedi. We had another appt with the pedi who diagnosed DD with ADHD inattentive type. After some sessions with a therapist, we developed some strategies for getting work done. We also started DD on meds, which made a huge improvement. Would her pedi be comfortable doing this? Good luck!

[twinmomma]

polecat8, We tried the scales before. ExH was entirely uncooperative in filling them out with me. The teacher basically blew us off. Granted, it was a different teacher at the time. But I just feel like that route led no where, so if we can get the full exam covered by insurance, then it's a third party telling exH what's going on, not just "my opinions" which is how he viewed the scales last time.

[twinmomma]

And, screw today completely. Beau was just officially denied PPP loans. They miss the payroll cut off date by two days. Two days. He's been through so many appeals this time around and no one told him there was this date cut off. He's been running around like crazy to keep re-submitting paperwork over and over. Today was the final verdict. I honestly don't know what it means for them now that he won't be getting any money at all. We have to talk about it tonight.

[sdlaura]

I'm pretty thrilled that taxes are delayed (sorry 186momx)! Mainly because we pay a ridiculous amount - even with a mortgage, 4 kids, claiming we are single and zero federal or state deductions, we still owe a ton every year. Darn high tax blue state and no small business/other tax benefits. So getting to make that transfer a bit later makes me happy.

I've been in meetings all morning and I'm trying to actually get anything on my to-do list done.

This is our last hybrid school week!! Then the kids have a 2-week spring break (they're doing camps), and then we go back 5 days a week (not a full day, but my kids will do aftercare on-site till 4 pm). So this is our last weird school week. Yay!

[k3am]

... DH dropped the kids off at a friends house yesterday while I was gone. He needed to take the dog to a happy visit and pick up DD’s Valium.. which he didn’t. WTF did he do for 4 hours?

[k3am]

You guys.. apparently the pharmacy is having a Valium shortage due to covid 😬

ETA: apparently it’s just the liquid Valium?

[186momx]

Oh I love the extra time to pay sdlaura, but I hate the attitude of so many of our clients that well now I don't have to push to gather stuff and can just give it to you next month at this time instead. Last year we had a number throw fits we weren't working Saturdays in June and July and one client was upset we weren't available 4th of July weekend to meet and told us its tax season still we should be working as if. We put them in place but geez people stop dinking around the numbers are what the numbers are waiting just can make things worse.

[mae0111]

Everyone was off this morning. I woke up with a migraine that I have not been able to shake. DD’s could not seem to get their acts together. Dog was insane and the mods were chasing him around screaming instead of getting ready for school.

We had windows installed back in January. One window arrived broken, so we had to schedule a second installation for DD1’s room, as well as fix some minor defects here and there. They were scheduled for today. DH took down curtains and shades and all hardware. Window guys show up... with no window. Didn’t know they were supposed to install a window. DH sent them away to find the window.

Good news is that we received a judgment in our favor in our case against our contractor. The judge awarded all funds we paid him, plus expenses, plus lawyer’s fees. Now comes the fun part... collecting from a guy that hasn’t worked in a year and lives in his mother’s basement.

[mommyatty]

I’m excited this may be the last year we get 5 figure refunds. Because my last employer was so bonus heavy, and thanks to Sarbanes-Oxley, I had to tell the company what percentage to withhold before knowing what my flipping bonus was, I always told them too high a percentage. But I was scared to owe a big tax debt, so the past 4 years, we’ve gotten refunds in the low to mid 5 figures. Which my tax person understood and agreed with the thought process, but she still just shook her head every time she handed us our return.

So this year I’m asking her to look at my stuff and tell me if I’m appropriately withholding so I even out.

In any event, you can bet we do our taxes early every year. We’ve already filed and are waiting for our big honking refund now.

[mae0111]

We, too, get huge refunds every year. Because of DH’s company we file quarterly, and it seems like there are always new rules about how to treat business expenses, entertainment, etc. so we withhold assuming we can’t write stuff off, and then we write the stuff off.

We usually file ASAP, but there are still some questions about how the PPP is being treated. So even though everything is done, our accountant had to file an extension. 🙄

[rere]

I spent my afternoon interviewing a ridiculously intelligent, over qualified individual for epidemiologist. One more tomorrow. But if this works out, I'm going to wonder why he would take this job, since the state sets the starting pay which is embarrassingly low.

[erinshelley21]

Day one of spring break here so the whole week is going to be a mix of working and not working, except for Wednesday when I'll be working the whole day. Today I worked until 1:30, got a quick workout in, then we took the kids to their well checks. Both are doing well, but DS is being referred to a neurologist and is having labs ran. He developed tics last summer (likely anxiety and possible genetics since my brother has a couple and my dad's side of the family has OCD tendencies) and the pedi wants to rule out all other causes. Labs are to make sure his body is processing the magnesium gummies we are giving him okay. At first she was kind of concerned about those so I felt like a failure for about 5 minutes, but then once she found out it's a pretty small amount she was less concerned. She also suggested that it might be ADHD, which I told her has been on our radar since I have it. He does great in school academically and behavior wise, but so did I, so I am happy the conversation has already been started. We really love our pedi and she told us that she was reviewing her schedule at home yesterday and she got so excited we were on it that she even made a comment to her H about it. I truly believe she was sincere too lol. I am not looking forward to the blood draw with DS though. He's going to lose his shit. I had to peel him off the chair when he got his flu shot, meanwhile DD didn't even tear up at that or her 2 shots today. She asked me this morning if she was getting a shot today and her response was "Yay" when I said yes. I can't with them.

[erinshelley21]

As for taxes, for the 2nd time in my 11 years of being responsible for my own taxes, I did not have to file an extension. The first time was the year DD was born so I was on top of it to prevent having to gather info with a toddler and newborn.

[shakinros]

Good luck twinmomma. I learned from our pedi that there is such a thing as “ADHD season” - it’s Feb-April, 2nd and 3rd grade. Your DD’s teacher should not be surprised about these scales! We got our DD’s diagnosis in spring of 2nd grade, using the questionnaire. It’s helpful. And affordable.

[sdlaura]

We had our (zoom) parent teacher conference for our challenging DS1 today. It was actually a positive experience. I’m so incredibly grateful for his wonderful teacher. We are all on the same page with what his challenges are (behavioral, not academic). I’m sending her lots of good vibes for having 22 kids in class everyday soon vs the 11 at a time she’s had most of this year.

[twinmomma]

Well, yesterday just kept getting more and more off the rails. Beau's ex is now engaged to the guy who lives halfway across the country. We have no idea what that means for her life, custody, etc.

[xctsclrx]

Mar 23, 2021 6:37:28 GMT -5 twinmomma said:

Well, yesterday just kept getting more and more off the rails. Beau's ex is now engaged to the guy who lives halfway across the country. We have no idea what that means for her life, custody, etc.

Ugh the hits keep coming today. Thinking about you.

[k3am]

As expected, valium was completely useless. We have to reschedule and force them to do it with sedation AND gas. That should be fun - the doctor hates the idea, the tech says it's necessary.