April Fool’s Day Check-in

[Jalapeñomel]

How’s everyone doing?

[jerseyjaybird]

Jalapeñomel, how are you doing?🤞🏻

We're a bit all over the place. At our WTF appointment, our RE offered the following:

1. Natural FET
2. Empirical Lovenox, if approved by a hematologist
3. He is open to an ERA if we really want to do one, but he says that the data does not show increased odds of success after this test (since we are now in our clinic's lowest 5%, these claims about "data" are falling on skeptical ears).

We also asked for an HSG, so that's happening on Monday.

We are leaning toward the natural FET and Lovenox (and pushing for Prednisone or Medrol, too), since it's something we haven't tried. If that fails, we would probably do an ERA before transferring our final embryo.

For the hell of it, DW did a consult with Dr. Sher, who is mostly retired. He thinks that she has alloimmune implantation dysfunction, which is the rarest immune situation, and the hardest to treat (because of course). I can't imagine that this is his go-to thought for all couples with secondary infertility and suspect that he sees it as an easy course correction: do another egg retrieval (with his clinic!) and use a different sperm donor. Rather than pursue the bloodwork he recommends, DW has an appointment booked with Dr. Derbala (pending insurance pre-approval for some costs). I can't tell whether we're being really smart and aggressive or really dumb and impatient, skipping ahead to RI stuff after three failed FETs of PGS normal embryos. Probably both. We also have consults booked with two other local REs, assuming we would change clinics before another retrieval.

[msmerymac]

jerseyjaybird, as I was reading that I was thinking that you should look into immunological reasons. I'm glad she's seeing Dr. Derbala. Even though I didn't move forward with another transfer, getting a full evaluation with Dr. KK was super helpful. It would also be great to find an RE who is more open to immune protocols. Mine tried neupogen, lovenox, and intralipids infusions, for example, before I went to Dr. KK.

[msmerymac]

We *might* have a surro match, fingers-crossed. I found her through a surrogacy matching group. She's a first-timer, but has 2 kids of her own. We've only messaged on facebook, but I think we click pretty well. She obviously had a few people reach out to her, but she tentatively wanted to move forward with next steps with us, so I put her in touch with our agency who will have her records sent to our clinic. She and we are both looking to transfer towards the end of the year, so there's time. Also, we'll be switched from our agency's premium plan to their BYO plan if it works which will save fees!

[katespade]

9DPO. I'm feeling really lost without the post-ovulation progesterone. I'm trying not to read too much into PMS vs implantation symptoms, but it's tough when I don't know what my luteal phase feels like without it.

[Jalapeñomel]

Apr 1, 2021 14:18:28 GMT -5 katespade said:

9DPO. I'm feeling really lost without the post-ovulation progesterone. I'm trying not to read too much into PMS vs implantation symptoms, but it's tough when I don't know what my luteal phase feels like without it.

And either could be happening with no symptoms!

[thedutchgirl]

We're planning to move forward with donor eggs at this point, I think. At least to the point we're doing the next steps for testing at this clinic, which wants them over from the first clinic we went to. Genetic testing and SA from my partner today. I had a new U/S and a hysteroscopy, plus blood work. Regroup with the doctor on 4/26. We're looking through their donors--they have better odds with their donors--and we have a couple we'll like. Probably make final decisions soon or around our appointment on the 26th.

[Jalapeñomel]

Apr 7, 2021 15:04:33 GMT -5 thedutchgirl said:

good luck. I know this was a hard decision. 

[ste]

TW update

SPOILER: Click to show

I had what I thought was going to be just a dating/viability US earlier this week. Unfortunately the dr came in after right as I was starting to relax about seeing a strong hb and said things didn’t look right. They’re not sure if it was the angle or real, but it’s a yellow flag because of my age and history. I go back for a repeat Tuesday, but it may be too soon to tell. I’m devastated. I thought this was our miracle, and here we are again right back in the same place of unknowing and waiting and misery. I just have an overwhelmingly bad feeling. And I have no idea what to do. I’m so sad.

[thedutchgirl]

Apr 9, 2021 8:16:49 GMT -5 Jalapeñomel said:

Apr 7, 2021 15:04:33 GMT -5 thedutchgirl said:

good luck. I know this was a hard decision. 

Thank you. I appreciate it.

[thedutchgirl]

ste, I'm so sorry. I hope Tuesday brings clarity and good news.

[Jalapeñomel]

I'm so sorry ste,

[ste]

TW

SPOILER: Click to show

I think this also means our shot a getting insurance to cover IVF is out the window since I did get pregnant. That’s probably the most devastating part, knowing we could already be started down the path to pgs already had things gone as initially planned, and instead we’re looking at another likely genetic issue and no coverage. I turn 40 this month and I’m just not sure I’m prepared for starting the process approaching my 41st birthday.

[katespade]

CD1.

[pinkpeony08]

I'm so sorry ste,

[katespade]

I'm so, so sorry, ste. I hope you get good news on Tuesday.

[thedutchgirl]

katespade, I'm so sorry it is CD1 for you.

ste, I hear you on age. We almost pulled the plug ourselves last month. I'm 43. It will be my first, if we do manage to be successful. It's hard to know if it is even right to do at this age, but I think we're giving it a shot, albeit not with my eggs. And if IVF is indicated, perhaps your RE can help with insurance.

[ste]

TW update

SPOILER: Click to show

I had my fu us this afternoon. The us tech (who is wonderful and was the same tech from my previous pregnancy/loss) said she was going to have the ob come in during the scan so we didn’t have to wait to hear anything and she could talk us through it. The ob said right away that she had reviewed the scan from last week and saw what they were unsure about. They didn’t see anything concerning today, and said I’m still measuring ahead and everything looks as expected. Obviously said there are things they can’t see, and it’s still v early, but as of now they’re not concerned. I have the kit to do the genetic screening late next week. I told my mom now we can be normal anxious for the next two weeks.

I still feel like I might puke. I lost 3lbs in the last week apparently.

[Jalapeñomel]

@ste I'll take that as good news for now, even though that doesn't relieve the anxiety.