Would you move?

[dutchgirl678]

Current situation:

Great new construction home, lived in for only 3 years. We like the school district and have mostly great neighbors. There have been some issues with the builder. We were supposed to get a pool and club house in our neighborhood, which is now going to be built over 1 mile away in an adjacent neighborhood. They will be too small to serve both neighborhoods but we won't be allowed to opt out once it is built so our HOA fees will go up (currently $100 per month, will go to $150). Our current house is big (3600sqft), 4 bed 2.5 bath, office, and downstairs daylight basement which we use for a play area and gym. The lot is not big (<5000 sq ft) but we had it landscaped and are happy with it.

New situation:

Older home on 3/4 acre wooded lot. Same school district. Lower HOA fees but does include pool, rec center, tennis courts, and basketball court access. Home is smaller (2500sqft) but with 3-car garage. 5 bed (1 downstairs which could be office) 3 bath. The formal living area could be repurposed into an office and dining area. The lot is preapproved to be divided so we could build a second home on it with a separate driveway. DH's parents have been looking to move closer to us, and we could potentially build a home for them on that lot which would be cheaper than them having a home built in a new development.

With how the market is currently, we think we could buy this house for about the same amount as our current house. But having the ability to build a second home on there which his parents could buy outright once they sell their house is good. Plus we could always sell it or rent it out in the future.

[maudefindlay]

How many live in your house? What are kid ages?

[heygrey]

I see no downsides to moving, especially if you break even with the sales. Do you like the layout of the other house? I find size is irrelevant, it’s the layout that makes or breaks a house.

[dragon's breath]

I would move, but I value the outdoor space and, hopefully, privacy. Also, I'd hate to be paying for a pool I couldn't use.

[simpsongal]

It’s a such a personal decision. Is a second home on a property desirable/easily permitted under local building codes? If your in laws died or needed assisted living would you sell that home or rent it?

I would prefer the large property, but that’s me.

[sju]

I would strongly consider it but it would depend on whether the older home needed renovations and if building a new house limit the privacy. I agree layout makes a difference too.

[konapoppy]

I would move.

[macmars45]

I would be super annoyed to pay for a pool I couldn't use. Like WTF.
I'd appreciate less sq ft personally and layout is key.

[tacokick]

$50/month for a pool that wasn’t as promised would bother me so much I’d move on principle and because I wouldn’t trust anything else they said or that anything else would be taken care of properly.

Is there any recourse there? It seems strange to be promised amenities that won’t actually exist and then charged for it. Was was in writing that this was a possibility? If it’s some sort of permit/building issue, why didn’t they know that to begin with? It sounds at worst shady and at best like they aren’t terribly competent.


The other house sounds many times better IMO.

[Susie]

Yeah, there's a lot of little reasons that moving sounds good.

A <5k sq. ft. yard would be dealbreakingly small for me, no matter how it was landscaped.  The idea of a 3600 sq. ft. house sitting on <5000 sf. would also bother me.  We recently moved from 0.25 acre to 0.61 acre, and it's great.  I love the extra space, plus we have no back neighbor.  Plan to budget for new yard care gear though.  After finding that it took 2-3 hours to mow the lawn with our old push mower, we invested in a John Deere lawn tractor.

The HOA fees thing would be super annoying, as well as the unmet expectations re: amenities.

I would also prefer 2500 sq. ft., 5 beds, and 3 baths, vs. 3600 sq. ft., 4 beds, and 2.5 baths.  Our new house is 2200 sf. and it's a really comfortable size.  Layout does matter a ton though.

[dutchgirl678]

We are not currently paying the $50 for the pool and rec center. Those will be on top of our current HOA fees once they are complete. But I'm still upset with how many times it has been postponed and how they are lying to the people who bought the homes in this neighborhood. We are used to not having big plots of land. Right now we are looking into our back neighbor's backyard. The new place would be more private even with the second lot being developed. There are also tall trees that need to stay and one side of the property sits next to a powerline park that will never be developed. There is grass and walking trails down the hill in this park.


We may not get the opportunity to do this if others are putting in an offer this week as well, but who knows if they will go through with it.

PDQ I will delete later.


The new house doesn't need a lot of upgrades, just paint and some light fixtures and recessed lights. It has beautiful hardwood floors downstairs, newer carpet elsewhere. The kitchen is from 2015 and the only thing missing is a pantry but that is not a huge deal. The 5th bedroom is really an office with a closet and our current house has a dedicated office as well. Since I WFH fulltime, we need that office. Not sure yet where we would put the treadmill and exercise bike, possibly in the guest bedroom since we don't have guests that often. The laundry room is downstairs, which will be an adjustment for us.

[orval]

After looking at the lot shape, I personally would not like a second home on that lot. Putting in a driveway and a small home would take up a ton of the lot. I agree with simpsongal to make sure your plan for the second home once the inlaws no longer live there. Also not crazy about all the power lines. If you don't put a second home on the lot, I like it much better! The house itself looks great.

[ssmjlm]

Looks like the house needs some landscaping. Don't quite get the steps to a small cement pad in the back.

Also, not a fan of the carpet cut out in the family room. Can you get the same wood to make it all HW?

I also would not build on that lot. If his parents move closer, I would just look for something that works for them vs building a structure next door.

[dutchgirl678]

Thanks for the comments. If it isn’t for the fact that we could build on the second lot for the in-laws, we probably won’t move. I agree that the lot is weirdly shaped and it is not ideal to be that close to the power lines. There would be a really long driveway next to the house.

I agree about the carpet in the family room and the lack of landscaping in the back. There is not even a shed or larger patio.

[stemmie]

Have you run the plan past the in-laws?

I like that my mom moved closer to me, but being in the next town is plenty close enough. IN my backyard would make me crazy. They may have specific ideas about their next home- like maybe a condo with no exterior maintenance or a 55+ community where it would be easier to make friends through activities.

[stemmie]

Plus, what if the house situation didn't work out and they moved elsewhere. You'd have someone living there you didn't pick.

[wildrice]

Do you think the in-law thing is a done deal? What would happen if you moved and that didn't end up happening? What if it did happen and it didn't work out as you expected - would you still want to move?

My sister moved all the way to Texas to be near her mother in law, and they've had nothing but drama in the last couple of years and now her MIL is moving away. I feel like her example is an extreme case, but I don't love the idea of completely planning your life around other family, either.

Personally the pool thing would bother me but for $600 a year no I would not move. Moving is a ton of hassle and expense and it will probably take you years to see a cost savings from getting away from that.

[dutchgirl678]

stemmie, we have been looking with them at homes in our area. I went to see a new construction community in a nearby town with them on Friday. We did discuss this plan with them, but they haven't given their green light yet though they do see the benefits. If it was my parents, I definitely wouldn't want them this close, but my in-laws are very private people and they wouldn't be over all the time unless they needed to be.

They don't want to live in a condo and are not really interested in a 55+ community.

I think the lot sizes of the two lots are big enough that it wouldn't bother us if someone else lived there (11000 sq ft for the main house and 9000 sq ft for the second property. Our current house sits only on a 4500sq ft lot).

Plus we would probably move to a downtown condo ourselves once the kids are out of the house, and at that point if they don't live there anymore we could sell both properties and they would be worth much more than the current property is worth right now, which would be good for our retirement.

My guess is that this is all speculative anyway and this house won't be on the market much longer. We are definitely not getting into a bidding war.

[sb]

I'm struggling to see where you would even put a second home on that lot with the current house's placement.

[mouse]

For this particular area/town, I think buildable land is a good investment, even if it’s a little awkward seeming. I wonder if you could do an adu instead of subdividing so you can stay in control of the lot.

[dutchgirl678]

Nov 15, 2021 16:25:50 GMT -5 mouse said:

For this particular area/town, I think buildable land is a good investment, even if it’s a little awkward seeming. I wonder if you could do an adu instead of subdividing so you can stay in control of the lot.

We thought about that. Our realtor actually looked at that as well. But according to the law the ADU can only be 700-800 sq ft. which I think is too small for his parents. Although it would help to force his aunt to move out who is currently renting a bedroom in their house.

[purplepenguin7]

I personally don't feel like this is move worth making. Moving itself is costly, time consuming as is just selling and buying house (or maybe just my experience). Based on the listing you shared it doesn't seem like you live in a year-round pool season state so the lack of pool or paying a minimal cost for a pool I couldn't use wouldn't cause me to move and up-end my current home unless I hated it. Are you sure you won't be able to use the pool/club house? I wouldn't mind driving a mile to use the pool as long as you were allowed to. If your subdivision isn't actually even allowed access to the pool I'm sure there is some recourse for fighting the HOA.

Also, with what wildrice, said....a similar thing happened to a friend of mine. She and her H moved to be near his parents. There was no real drama but just a few years later the in-laws moved south to retire. My friend felt a lot like wtf are we doing here now (and they eventually moved as well). All to say, move/live where you want to be, not for any future uncertain plans.

[nicolewi]

I think no, I wouldn't move. Your current lot is crazy tiny by our local standards, and I would want more space for my kids to play, but it doesn't sound like that's something that is bothering YOU.

I don't like the weird size/shape of that other lot, I'm not really sure if the whole building-for-the-in-laws thing is a good idea at all on several levels, and your current house sounds very nice and new and like it really works for you. Unless you are not liking your house, or unless you really don't like where you are, or have some other concern with your current house, I don't think I would move b/c of the rec center/pool/in-law reasons.

[mouse]

Nov 15, 2021 17:02:32 GMT -5 dutchgirl678 said:

Nov 15, 2021 16:25:50 GMT -5 mouse said:

For this particular area/town, I think buildable land is a good investment, even if it’s a little awkward seeming. I wonder if you could do an adu instead of subdividing so you can stay in control of the lot.

We thought about that. Our realtor actually looked at that as well. But according to the law the ADU can only be 700-800 sq ft. which I think is too small for his parents. Although it would help to force his aunt to move out who is currently renting a bedroom in their house.

Oof. Yeah, if it were me I’d look into a somewhat portable ADU - we have neighbors with a converted shipping container that’s super cute - and view the lot size as an investment for when you go to sell. I don’t feel like 800 sq ft is too small for a retired couple, it’d be easy to outfit for disabilities and if they move you could use it as an Airbnb or something if you wanted. We’re going to see so much infill in the next few years and beyond, I’d go for it if I could swing it. However, I hate moving and figuring out these logistics for myself, so it’s easy to talk big. 😂

The pool thing would irk me, but I agree that alone wouldn’t be worth it to move over. But if the opportunity is otherwise appealing, it might be worth it.

[dutchgirl678]

Thanks for all the feedback. We decided not to go for this opportunity. ILs are currently on the wait list for some new construction homes in a nearby town (approx 30 minutes drive from us) which seems like it is a better solution for them.