TW @: Uvalde School Shooting 5/24/22

[underwaterrhymes]

Mine are 6 and 8 and I had a very high level conversation with them because they’re getting to the age where they hear stuff at school. (My oldest told me about “this virus” that was coming back in February 2020 because he heard it from a friend and they asked about Ukraine, too.)

I told them “I want to talk to you about something that you might hear about at school. You know how you have lockdown drills and have to be small and very quiet? Today some kids had to do that because of a bad guy and it was very scary and sad. But your mommy and daddy and school all do everything we can to keep you safe and I want you to know that you can come talk to us about anything always, okay?”

I don’t know if I did the best job, but I wanted them to hear something from me before kids at school, while keeping it as not scary as I could.

[neverfstop]

In response to the Texas elementary school shooting, Sen. Joe Manchin (D-WV) told reporters that he’ll “do anything I can” to prevent future shootings–except get rid of the Senate filibuster, which he insisted is “only thing that prevents us from total insanity.” Instead, Manchin proposed “common sense.” Okay!

[carmenere]

May 25, 2022 8:32:02 GMT -5 erbear said:

Narratives we can say are categorically false:
1. This came out of nowhere (false: the gunman had posted photos of two rifles on his social media two days ago, and had texted them to friends)

2. Good guys with a gun could have saved everyone (false: three armed police officers engaged him outside the building and still he was able to get inside and kill 21 people)

3. He was mentally ill (maybe true: common sense gun control laws might have kept guns out of his hands. Also, if mental health is the issue, then stop taking money out of the organizations that are trying to combat the problem. You don't get to blame mental health, yet impede its solutions at every turn.)

4. These crimes are committed by people who obtain guns illegally (false: he bought these guns legally. At 18. Before he could legally buy beer).

The House has passed common sense gun control. 90% of the American people support background checks. Republicans in the Senate, who represent far fewer than 50% of the country, refuse to even bring it to a vote. This nation continues to be held hostage by a minority of shitty (largely white men) lawmakers whose thirst for power is more important than children's lives.

I have my classroom door closed and locked today. I never do either of those things.

It makes me so angry that we've normalized #1 to the point that no one gives it a second thought. Also, I have a mentally ill family member and I am terrified of him getting into an encounter with the police. While I always hope for more mental health awareness and resources, lie #2 directly endangers people like him.

I am sad and angry about every aspect of this but especially for teachers who have to bear the weight of it. In my last job at a school I was semi-responsible for a dozen students for a few hours a day and I often thought about whether I could adequately protect them in an emergency. I can't imagine how it must weigh on teachers. 

[missva]

@@ I did horribly addressing this with my 13 year old. I hadn't read an update since earlier in the day until right before dinner where I saw the #'s. I just lost it - completely broke down in front of my family. I'm sure I scarred my son :-(

[wanderingback]

I am not an expert on guns or the law, but I just want to say I do not like the phrasing "common sense gun control.” I don’t know, that just sounds too nice and feels like a compromise. We clearly need extreme change like getting rid of all guns. Yes I know people will come in here and say that’s never going to happen legally but I hate tap dancing around this subject.

I don’t know if I have the bandwidth myself to take on a lot of action steps since I’m heavily involved in the abortion access crisis, but if people more knowledgeable than me on this issue could post some concrete progressive action steps I’d appreciate it.

[msmerymac]

May 24, 2022 16:36:12 GMT -5 pugz said:

The Senate needs to fucking pass something. Sinema and Manchin get the FUCK on board.

Manchin is pro gun-control. 

[okla]

May 25, 2022 9:06:23 GMT -5 msmerymac said:

May 24, 2022 16:36:12 GMT -5 pugz said:

The Senate needs to fucking pass something. Sinema and Manchin get the FUCK on board.

Manchin is pro gun-control. 

Nothing will pass unless he agrees to end the filibuster, though.

[Bad Dingo]

I'm thankfully WFH today since I couldn't sleep all night and have been intermittently crying.

I'm watching the Today Show, which I can't remember the last time I did, and Hoda is doing amazing.

I wish everyone would just say 'guns. The problem is the guns.' I feel like they are skirting around the issue a little too much. Hoda did say that if kids 18 and younger didn't have access to guns then 70% of the school shootings wouldn't have happened.

[cville]

I'm just I don't even know. The high intensity rage and sadness are leaving me feeling numb and limp and defeated.

Why won't people in power fucking do something!? I know why, but WHY?

[maddiepaddy]

If we can pull formula off the shelves leaving parents struggling to feed their babies after two deaths and a handful of illnesses, we can certainly do SOMETHING when 19 kids are flat out murdered. Like WTAF.

I know it’s not an equivalence, but seriously. Why should guns trump everything and everyone in the country?!?!? Why is everything else on the table? Books? Kids sports? Bodily autonomy? We don’t need these things. But, guns? Non negotiable. Assholes.

[glitzy07]

There is a new school opening in our district this fall and my kids were re-zoned for that school next year. We requested to stay where they go now, because the kids really want to stay with their friends. The new school is built with special lockdown doors that can cordon off full sections of the school in the event of a school shooting. All I could think about as I was falling asleep last night is that maybe I made the wrong choice in letting my kids stay where they are now. It's so fucked that we have to think that AND that the schools have to be built that way in the first place!

I did tell my 3rd and K boys this morning. I have no idea if I did a terrible job. I tried to keep it high level and to tell them that I wanted them to hear from me so that they didn't hear from another student and feel scared because they didn't have an adult to talk to. My 3rd grader has already done several lockdown drills, but for some reason they haven't done anything this year and my Kindergartener was very confused. UGH.

[waverly]

May 25, 2022 9:15:30 GMT -5 maddiepaddy said:

If we can pull formula off the shelves leaving parents struggling to feed their babies after two deaths and a handful of illnesses, we can certainly do SOMETHING when 19 kids are flat out murdered. Like WTAF.

I know it’s not an equivalence, but seriously. Why should guns trump everything and everyone in the country?!?!? Why is everything else on the table? Books? Kids sports? Bodily autonomy? We don’t need these things. But, guns? Non negotiable. Assholes.

Because the gun manufacturers, gun lobby, and NRA contribute to their campaigns in exchange for this.  Perhaps stopping the money is the first step. 


elections.bradyunited.org/take-action/nra-donations-116th-congress-senators


www.theguardian.com/us-news/2018/feb/16/florida-school-shooting-focus-shifts-to-nra-gun-lobby-cash-to-lawmakers- This article is old, but the issue has been going on for years, at least 20 +.  

[neverfstop]

I feel like this country is irredeemable. We're just getting more divided, we continue to have minority rule - through the billionaires, through corporations and lobbyists, through gerrymandering, through SCOTUS, through the filibuster. It feels like everything is just so wrong and can (won't) ever be fixed. Yes it's the guns, but there's so many things that most people support & want as citizens, but we can't get anything accomplished on healthcare, reproductive justice, police reform, environmental issues, economic inequality, systemic racism, and the list just goes on...our systems are broken and getting more broken everyday.

[Bad Dingo]

[RitzyHeifer]

May 25, 2022 9:01:36 GMT -5 missva said:

@@ I did horribly addressing this with my 13 year old. I hadn't read an update since earlier in the day until right before dinner where I saw the #'s. I just lost it - completely broke down in front of my family. I'm sure I scarred my son :-(

Oh, hugs to you.

I think 13 is old enough to understand a little and not be too scared by a parent crying. And I think there is value in letting them see that it affects you and that it’s okay to feel these emotions.

[shauni27]

I haven't been able to concentrate. I couldn't eat last night. I just feel so sick.

I heard a mom on NPR today who lost a daughter to gun violence that she is going down to Texas to meet with other parents struggling. she said "I want to tell these parents I understand how they feel. That they want to die right now, too, but that eventually that feeling will pass and you will feel joy again" and I just burst into tears. She sounded so tired that she had to go sit with survivors once again.

I have already seen a friend of a friend post that arming teachers is the best way to combat school shootings. I just cannot.

[noodleoo]

May 25, 2022 9:29:13 GMT -5 neverfstop said:

I feel like this country is irredeemable. We're just getting more divided, we continue to have minority rule - through the billionaires, through corporations and lobbyists, through gerrymandering, through SCOTUS, through the filibuster. It feels like everything is just so wrong and can (won't) ever be fixed. Yes it's the guns, but there's so many things that most people support & want as citizens, but we can't get anything accomplished on healthcare, reproductive justice, police reform, environmental issues, economic inequality, systemic racism, and the list just goes on...our systems are broken and getting more broken everyday.

This is where I am.  I don't see how we come back from where we are today.  I feel like it is time to dismantle and start over.

[fernweh]

May 25, 2022 8:00:49 GMT -5 isabel said:

I haven’t told DS1. I don’t want to scare him. He’s done with school for the year, but he’s there most days for summer care.

I feel numb this morning. I don’t understand how we continue to do this.

Some idiot posted on a friend’s status last night and I engaged. She kept saying gun control isn’t the answer. When I directly asked what we should do, she said she didn’t know. Her profile picture is her with her husband and two kids. How does a mother put guns before her children? How does a mother throw up her hands and say the only solution anyone can come up with won’t work? How does a mother decide that all of this is inevitable and nothing can be done? I cannot make my brain understand.

H and I HAD a friend who after a previous shooting posted something on Facebook along the lines of “if my kids are every killed in a school shooting, please don’t let the libs use them as an excuse to take away our rights/guns”.
I don’t know how he reacted to this current one since he is obviously no longer a person we engage with but this blew my mind. You would literally rather sacrifice your own children to have guns. As a non-parent, I can absolutely not wrap my head around this.

[fivechickens]

May 25, 2022 9:01:36 GMT -5 missva said:

@@ I did horribly addressing this with my 13 year old. I hadn't read an update since earlier in the day until right before dinner where I saw the #'s. I just lost it - completely broke down in front of my family. I'm sure I scarred my son :-(

@@@

I was horrible at it too.

I was holding up really well. Pushing my sadness deep down so that I didn’t upset my kids (this didn’t directly affect me I can hold in my feelings, you know). But, while they were getting ready for school, I was watching GMA and Ginger Zee was talking about how she wanted to run home and keep her kids from going to school. It hit hard and I lost it just as D3 came into the living room. She asked what was wrong just as they started talking about Robb Elementary and she said ‘oh no… that’s sad’.

So fucking sad and makes me so fucking angry.

[ECB]

May 25, 2022 9:37:45 GMT -5 fernweh said:

May 25, 2022 8:00:49 GMT -5 isabel said:

I haven’t told DS1. I don’t want to scare him. He’s done with school for the year, but he’s there most days for summer care.

I feel numb this morning. I don’t understand how we continue to do this.

Some idiot posted on a friend’s status last night and I engaged. She kept saying gun control isn’t the answer. When I directly asked what we should do, she said she didn’t know. Her profile picture is her with her husband and two kids. How does a mother put guns before her children? How does a mother throw up her hands and say the only solution anyone can come up with won’t work? How does a mother decide that all of this is inevitable and nothing can be done? I cannot make my brain understand.

H and I HAD a friend who after a previous shooting posted something on Facebook along the lines of “if my kids are every killed in a school shooting, please don’t let the libs use them as an excuse to take away our rights/guns”.
I don’t know how he reacted to this current one since he is obviously no longer a person we engage with but this blew my mind. You would literally rather sacrifice your own children to have guns. As a non-parent, I can absolutely not wrap my head around this.

This is the lie that pisses me off the most.  "Someone" (Probably fox news) said that the left wants to take away all guns, but if these people would actually stop, DO SOME RESEARCH and maybe actually TALK to some democrats, they'd find out that was most people want are controls and regulations in place - like we have with cars.    Yes, there are people that would love to get rid of all guns - I mean, really, I'm fine with that myself, but that isn't a driving force for me.  But basic, logical laws IS a driving force. 

I would like to find a middle ground at least to start.  But these fools are fed lie after lie after lie and just believe it and dig their heels in even further. 

[af1212]

May 25, 2022 9:33:00 GMT -5 RitzyHeifer said:

May 25, 2022 9:01:36 GMT -5 missva said:

@@ I did horribly addressing this with my 13 year old. I hadn't read an update since earlier in the day until right before dinner where I saw the #'s. I just lost it - completely broke down in front of my family. I'm sure I scarred my son :-(

Oh, hugs to you.

I think 13 is old enough to understand a little and not be too scared by a parent crying. And I think there is value in letting them see that it affects you and that it’s okay to feel these emotions.

You are a real person and you have feelings and your son knows that. If he is scarred it has nothing to do with his mom crying and everything to do with a country that has put guns ahead of children.

[pixy0stix]

It's ok if our kids see us scared, sad, and angry. They need to know that they can express those emotions in a healthy way. I cried this morning watching the news, and my 3 year old gave me cuddles. We talked about how a bad man had hurt kids, and mommy and daddy were sad. We talked about how we would do everything we could to keep him safe and that he was loved. This is a terrible fucking tragedy, and it's ok to show that to our kids.

[Deleted]

I let my 9 year old stay home today because she said her chapped lips hurt. If my 12 year old didn't have finals I would have let her stay home too.

[basilosaurus]

May 25, 2022 9:01:36 GMT -5 missva said:

@@ I did horribly addressing this with my 13 year old. I hadn't read an update since earlier in the day until right before dinner where I saw the #'s. I just lost it - completely broke down in front of my family. I'm sure I scarred my son :-(

Showing that vulnerability is at least as important as having the "right" words.

Just tonight I was telling my partner how scarred I still was from watching a friend die on the playground when I was 8. This was over 30 years ago, and I still tear up. I didn't tell my dad b/c I didn't want him to worry about me.

Him coming to me (because it made front page news), him crying, made such an impact, as positive as could be in a freak accident situation.

IANAP. I'm no expert. But I remember only a handful of times my dad cried, and I felt safer with him because of it. I came to him after that many times when my emotions overwhelmed my words. You did not scar him! You showed him that emotions are ok! And sharing them is also ok! You did well.

[neverfstop]

talkingpointsmemo.com/news/gallego-cruz-school-shooting

Rep. Ruben Gallego (D-AZ) tore into Sen. Ted Cruz (R-TX) on Tuesday night after the GOP senator groaned about renewed pushes for gun control in the wake of a deadly shooting at Robb Elementary School in Uvalde, Texas.

“Fuck you tedcruz,” Gallego tweeted. “You care about a fetus but you will let our children get slaughtered.”

“Just get your ass to Cancun. You are useless,” he added, referring to the time when Cruz fled to a Mexican beach resort in the middle of a Texas power outage that was caused by a major snowstorm, leaving millions of Texans without heat last year.

The Democrat put extra emphasis on his callout of the Texas Republican later on Tuesday, tweeting “Just to be clear fuck you tedcruz you fucking baby killer.”

ei.marketwatch.com/Multimedia/2017/10/03/Photos/NS/MW-FV544_gun_ri_20171003131402_NS.jpg?uuid=40865a4e-a85e-11e7-b71e-9c8e992d421e

[sakura]

sdlaura any comment?

[erbear]

May 25, 2022 9:56:41 GMT -5 pixy0stix said:

It's ok if our kids see us scared, sad, and angry. They need to know that they can express those emotions in a healthy way. I cried this morning watching the news, and my 3 year old gave me cuddles. We talked about how a bad man had hurt kids, and mommy and daddy were sad. We talked about how we would do everything we could to keep him safe and that he was loved. This is a terrible fucking tragedy, and it's ok to show that to our kids.

This.

I offered my classroom to kids who wanted to sit here or talk during recess. 25 of my 44 8th graders were here. Many cried. So did I. I think it's healthy for kids to see that hard shit happens and strong emotions are appropriate.

[TR]

May 25, 2022 10:13:52 GMT -5 sakura said:

sdlaura any comment?

This is unnecessary. I understand this is a highly emotional and stressful topic for everyone, but sdlaura doesn't need to answer for this horrific act just because she was trying to offer some perspective (in a completely different thread).

[irishbride2]

I told my 12 year old and honestly it was depressing how normal it was to her.

[gretchenindisguise]

May 25, 2022 10:13:52 GMT -5 sakura said:

sdlaura any comment?

I noticed you bringing this up in the post on ML as well, and I'm not sure why you're harping on sdlaura's comment.

This is a tragedy of the utmost. I want to do everything in my power to prevent it from happening again.

But I still sent my kids to school today. It is still a low base rate. Is it too high? Yes! It should be zero! It is so high I wouldn't send my children to school? No. As evidenced by my kids being in school today.