Have you seen the chess scandal?

[Jalapeñomel]

This is wild to say the least.

www.euronews.com/culture/amp/2022/09/16/chess-grandmaster-denies-cheating-by-using-anal-beads

[nsl]

I feel like I'm a pretty worldly person most of the time, and then I learn that wireless vibrating anal beads are a thing and suddenly I realize that I most definitely am not.

[mrsslocombe]

My main question is...how did he manage to sit on them the whole time? They should have a flared base ...and stick out. I can't imagine it would have been easy find a way to sit with those things shoved up the cocoa canyon.

[livinitup]

I’m not opening that link.


Maybe later.

[mofongo]

But, how did he cheat? Lol, I need that explained.

[momin2013]

mrsslocombe, anal beads are typically on a string, so just the string part would be left hanging out, it wouldn’t be difficult to sit with them in.

mofongo, my guess is they suspect someone was sending him signals with the vibrations, maybe like Morse code style or something similar…?

Why do I have so many answers/thoughts on this…?🤦🏽‍♀️

[foundmylazybum]

Sept 19, 2022 18:37:46 GMT -5 mofongo said:

But, how did he cheat? Lol, I need that explained.

It said morse code? 

What? What is going on? I also need this explained. What is performance enhancing here!? 

[HRH Queen Dick I, Orphan]

Sept 19, 2022 18:24:36 GMT -5 mrsslocombe said:

cocoa canyon

I'm sorry but this is your only warning. I'm going to have to disable your account if you use this again.

[ProfessorArtNerd]

See, and I read it as the anal beads were HOW he proved he wasn’t cheating. I didn’t open the link and I’m not going to

[nsl]

Sept 19, 2022 18:50:00 GMT -5 momin2013 said:

mrsslocombe , anal beads are typically on a string, so just the string part would be left hanging out, it wouldn’t be difficult to sit with them in.

mofongo , my guess is they suspect someone was sending him signals with the vibrations, maybe like Morse code style or something similar…?

Why do I have so many answers/thoughts on this…?🤦🏽‍♀️

I'm glad someone does because I'm batting zero on this story!

[maudefindlay]

I opened it. Grossest thing is that Elon Musk weighed in on the scandal.

[TR]

I think the anal beads are just the accusation, he didn’t definitely have them in. At least nothing I’ve read says that. It’s honestly fascinating because I don’t know how you would cheat in this situation, but he does seem like an asshole and he’s cheated online in the past so I’m inclined to think he did here, too.

[TR]

This is the article I read originally: www.theguardian.com/sport/2022/sep/09/chess-hans-niemann-hits-back-over-cheating-controversy-in-st-louis?utm_campaign=mb&utm_medium=newsletter&utm_source=morning_brew

[maudefindlay]

Sept 19, 2022 19:05:34 GMT -5 TR said:

I think the anal beads are just the accusation, he didn’t definitely have them in. At least nothing I’ve read says that. It’s honestly fascinating because I don’t know how you would cheat in this situation, but he does seem like an asshole and he’s cheated online in the past so I’m inclined to think he did here, too.

Don't signal your doubt to him, he is willing to strip naked.

[sofamonkey]

I mean, I knew they had vibrating vaginal beads. It never occurred to me that a) they’d be used nefariously, or b) they had anal beads of the same type.

Question though, because I’m not opening that either, lest we see another canyon type comment. Would that imply someone is better at chess? If so, why aren’t they enter red? Were they banned?

Fun fact - I used to know some Morse code. And semaphore! Obviously not enough to play chess professionally.

[notreal]

I can't believe someone still knows Morse Code. I thought the only people who still did were navy pilots and hardcore HAM operators.

[notreal]

Sept 19, 2022 19:08:27 GMT -5 sofamonkey said:

I mean, I knew they had vibrating vaginal beads. It never occurred to me that a) they’d be used nefariously, or b) they had anal beads of the same type.

Question though, because I’m not opening that either, lest we see another canyon type comment. Would that imply someone is better at chess? If so, why aren’t they enter red? Were they banned?

Fun fact - I used to know some Morse code. And semaphore! Obviously not enough to play chess professionally.

I think they would look up defenses to certain moves in books or online or by watching the Queen's Gambit or whatever and then signal the suggestion/ solution.

Edit:Chess makes me cry and feel stupid so this is just a guess not something I saw anywhere in the coverage of the story.

[VillainV]

Sept 19, 2022 19:08:27 GMT -5 sofamonkey said:

I mean, I knew they had vibrating vaginal beads. It never occurred to me that a) they’d be used nefariously, or b) they had anal beads of the same type.

Question though, because I’m not opening that either, lest we see another canyon type comment. Would that imply someone is better at chess? If so, why aren’t they enter red? Were they banned?

Fun fact - I used to know some Morse code. And semaphore! Obviously not enough to play chess professionally.

I think they are implying that someone is feeding his opponent’s moves into a computer and letting the computer figure out how to counter it….then relaying the computer’s counter-move back to anal-bead-guy using some kind of code.

[mofongo]

Sept 19, 2022 18:50:39 GMT -5 foundmylazybum said:

Sept 19, 2022 18:37:46 GMT -5 mofongo said:

But, how did he cheat? Lol, I need that explained.

It said morse code? 

What? What is going on? I also need this explained. What is performance enhancing here!? 

Are these beads and his *cocoa canyon both SO sensitive that someone can communicate in Morse code, successfully? Both the sender and receiver of information here…
Very impressive lol

* HRH Queen Dick I, Orphan

[sofamonkey]

Sept 19, 2022 19:29:02 GMT -5 mofongo said:

Sept 19, 2022 18:50:39 GMT -5 foundmylazybum said:

It said morse code? 

What? What is going on? I also need this explained. What is performance enhancing here!? 

Are these beeds and his *cocoa canyon both SO sensitive that someone can communicate in Morse code, successfully? Both the sender and receiver of information here…
Very impressive lol

*@dickmove

Vaginal beads use an app on your phone. Not sure about the other ::googles cocoa canyon app::

[sofamonkey]

Sept 19, 2022 19:31:02 GMT -5 sofamonkey said:

Sept 19, 2022 19:29:02 GMT -5 mofongo said:

Are these beeds and his *cocoa canyon both SO sensitive that someone can communicate in Morse code, successfully? Both the sender and receiver of information here…
Very impressive lol

*@dickmove

Vaginal beads use an app on your phone. Not sure about the other ::googles cocoa canyon app::

Sorry to quote myself, but

-. --- / .-. . ... ..- .-.. - ...

[HRH Queen Dick I, Orphan]

.

[bittybomb]

Sept 19, 2022 18:56:09 GMT -5 HRH Queen Dick I, Orphan said:

Sept 19, 2022 18:24:36 GMT -5 mrsslocombe said:

cocoa canyon

I'm sorry but this is your only warning. I'm going to have to disable your account if you use this again.

Snorted. Had to sign in just to like.

[nsl]

Sept 19, 2022 19:08:41 GMT -5 notreal said:

I can't believe someone still knows Morse Code. I thought the only people who still did were navy pilots and hardcore HAM operators.

Not even a little bit relevant to the OP, but I have a beaded necklace that spells out "fuck the patriarchy" in Morse code. My OB/GYN, who was an Army doctor for most of her career, not only figured out that it was code during my last appointment, but read it backwards because I put it on wrong.

My OB/GYN is awesome and we definitely bonded that day.

[VillainV]

Sept 19, 2022 19:49:19 GMT -5 nsl said:

Sept 19, 2022 19:08:41 GMT -5 notreal said:

I can't believe someone still knows Morse Code. I thought the only people who still did were navy pilots and hardcore HAM operators.

Not even a little bit relevant to the OP, but I have a beaded necklace that spells out "fuck the patriarchy" in Morse code. My OB/GYN, who was an Army doctor for most of her career, not only figured out that it was code during my last appointment, but read it backwards because I put it on wrong.

My OB/GYN is awesome and we definitely bonded that day.

Yeah, so, I’m gonna need to know where to get one of these necklaces….

[mcppalmbeach]

Sept 19, 2022 19:53:13 GMT -5 VillainV said:

Sept 19, 2022 19:49:19 GMT -5 nsl said:

Not even a little bit relevant to the OP, but I have a beaded necklace that spells out "fuck the patriarchy" in Morse code. My OB/GYN, who was an Army doctor for most of her career, not only figured out that it was code during my last appointment, but read it backwards because I put it on wrong.

My OB/GYN is awesome and we definitely bonded that day.

Yeah, so, I’m gonna need to know where to get one of these necklaces….

X2

[kaneen]

This feels like a lot of effort to win a chess game. Feels like the juice isn't really worth the squeeze on this one.

[W.T.Faulkner]

The Queen’s Gambit

[maudefindlay]

Sept 19, 2022 20:14:37 GMT -5 kaneen said:

This feels like a lot of effort to win a chess game. Feels like the juice isn't really worth the squeeze on this one.

Citizen's arrest!

[mofongo]

Sept 19, 2022 20:57:48 GMT -5 maudefindlay said:

Sept 19, 2022 20:14:37 GMT -5 kaneen said:

This feels like a lot of effort to win a chess game. Feels like the juice isn't really worth the squeeze on this one.

Citizen's arrest!

I mean juice AND squeeze!!