@ March Covid

[kitty]

Lockdown anniversary edition for @ stuff

When our schools shut down in March 2020, my oldest was in 3rd, my middle was in K, and my youngest was in PK3. This year my middle is in 3rd and my youngest is in K and most of the curriculum is the same as their older sib’s. Whenever the teachers mention a project that is coming up for the third trimester, I definitely get triggered remembering trying to do that same assignment at home while also trying to work and entertain my youngest.

[mpm]

Our kindergartener’s class is back to group classroom activities that involve blowing air through straws. WHY? Have we learned nothing these last three years? There are so many other ways to teach wind during a pandemic that by the way is still ongoing. I’m absolutely livid she was encouraged to take her mask off for it and we weren’t told until afterwards. How can teachers see a 5-year old wearing a kf94 mask in school and think to themselves “this child’s parents must be kidding, I should use peer pressure and my own position of power to encourage them to do something their parents told them not to do.”

[arehopsveggies]

I spent today cleaning out my “homeschool closet” from 2020-21. That gave me some feelings.

DS2 is the same age ds 1 was… I found some work the teacher had sent home, which was the same work she showed us last week at conferences

[erbear]

I’m taking my class to DC next week for the first time since I canceled the trip on March 9, 2020 out of “an abundance of caution”.

[waverly]

I still have 2 desks, and 2 monitors and a bunch of supplies left over from homeschooling. I need to get rid of at least 1 desk, but I currently have a weight restriction from lifting items. So I guess it will stay for a while, unless DH and DS can get it out. I think I'll just put it on the curb with a free sign. Not sure what to do with the monitors or otherwise. I was keeping them in case we shut down again, le sigh.

[chickadee77]

Welp, we're still homeschooling, so there's that. At least we're not in FL anymore so even if/when they go back to school they can talk about their uncles and have their teachers read books spontaneously lolsob

[beerlover]

It just feels so surreal that my son was 3 when this all started and now he is 6. Lock down was so rough with him, we basically left him in the living room/playroom all day with toys/TV so that H and I could work (we checked on him and fed him of course lol). Everything was always a complete mess, toys everywhere, & crumbs from him taking it upon himself to get snacks. Those were dark times and it just felt so relentless. I feel very lucky he's having a completely normal Kindergarten experience and that I didn't have to do virtual school with him (it's challenging enough when he's had a few virtual snow days). I also haven't heard of anyone in his class all year having Covid. That's not to say it hasn't happened, but it has definitely faded to the background.

[formerlyak]

My youngest was in Kinder when things shut down. I’m grateful he got to start Kinder normally. It seems the kids who started Kinder in fall 2020 to varying degrees of hybrid or zoom school are having the most challenges around here. I was talking with one of our school’s Kinder teachers at a community volunteer thing this weekend and she echoed the same observation. My youngest still has some of the meltdowns that happened when schools were closed but they have become far less frequent. He even asked if he could start online Spanish class again, something he did during lockdowns.

My oldest was in 8th grade. For him, there was a lot of social growing up that was missed that summer between 8th and 9th. He and his friends seem to have moved past it, but we did see a lot of the 8th grade pettiness and immaturity happening once schools opened again at the end of 9th and beginning of 10th. A good friend of mine teaches high school and she said there are still days she sees social behavior that is more typical of middle school in her students. It’s not something she saw pre-Covid shutdowns.

[Velar Fricative]

I think about the impacts a lot.

My kids fortunately seem fairly unscathed from it. DD1 was at the end of first grade when everything shut down, so at least she had a normal kindergarten and most of first grade. She was able to go into school starting in September 2020 for second grade but due to distancing it wasn't full-time until the spring. And now it's hard to believe she's almost done with fourth grade and is just a year and a half away from middle school because it feels like she just started at her elementary school! But she's been nimble and shows no negative impacts from the experience.

DD2 really lucked out being a 2017 baby, honestly. Too little to understand what was going on when daycare shut down, but fortunately she was able to attend Pre-K3 in September 2020 full-time the whole year. So she was only home full-time for about 5 months, during prime potty training time lol. Barring any other crises, she should be able to enjoy the full 7 years at her school (she started there in Pre-K4). Academically she's fine too.

I feel most lousy for all the kids who graduated from their schools in 2020, as well as the kids who were in middle school during that period because it's only 3 years so they barely spend time in middle school.

[breezy8407]

I think my kids were/are young enough that it won't impact their education as it did for some kids who were in middle/high school in 2020. One thing we heard recently is our kids (5th grade) are behind in science, as the focus was on reading and math during distance learning.

[Susie]

I went to NYC this past weekend for the first time since the pandemic, and there was this really incongruous feeling between seeing signs up on doors indicating that to enter you must be vaccinated against covid, and announcements in the theater, recommending that audience members wear a mask during the performance, vs. the nearly complete return to "old normal" that people were actually demonstrating.  The number of masks on subways, trains, theaters, and everywhere else only felt a little higher than pre-covid.  That aside, it did feel really good to enlarge my world.  I was there to meet up with a really good friend who was there (from the west coast) for work, who I haven't seen in 4 years.

As for my kids, we're really lucky that they're doing well.  One spent the spring of pre-k and most of K at home, but she does not seem to have academically suffered.  My 3 year old doesn't remember lockdown.  He spent it learning to crawl and later walk.  He had just graduated out of physical therapy (for torticolis and subsequent low muscle tone) in January 2020 so we were also super lucky that the pandemic didn't impact his ability to access that therapy when he needed it.

I feel like I am only beginning to heal from the experience.  The mental health impacts, sleep deprivation, isolation, and desperation of the protracted and impossible juggle of a relatively alpha career, a FT working spouse, kids who couldn't be vaccinated until relatively late in the game due to their ages, and absolutely no backup/family support really did a number on me.  It's taking some time to climb out of that hole.

[madDawg228]

I think today or yesterday (3/5) marks my official 3rd anniversary of being told to not come into the office again until further notice due to a Covid+ person in another office in the building (of 25+ floors). I was 22-ish weeks pregnant, so I was considered to be in a high risk group. I liked staying home for my entire 3rd trimester, though there's lots of stuff I missed out on to celebrate my pregnancy.

Having a newborn during 2020 was interesting, and probably easier in a lot of ways than if I had to be back 5 days/week in-office by 12-16 weeks PP like it would have been pre-Covid. My 2 1/2 yo is developmentally normal, in preschool. Lockdown would have been a lot tougher with him in his age group now, compared to when he just needed to be held or on the floor for tummy time.

[msmerymac]

My infant started daycare last week and I'm so nervous about germs. Three years in!

[StrawberryBlondie]

My kid was in K in when covid started, so I don't think it really affected her, school-wise or socially. She's smart, seems well-adjusted, happy. Those first few months were rough, but that's about it. By June she was able to go to a mostly-outside day camp and her mood and general demeanor were almost immediately better.

Academically, I think it really helped that my school district prioritized in-person learning for kids in k-2 for the 2020/21 school year and she was in school 4 days/week until they went to full in person in Feb or March 2021. Virtual learning just did not work for her so I'm not sure where we'd be at if she'd been in 5th grade, where they had 4 days of virtual and 1 of in person each week.

[pixy0stix]

Mar 6, 2023 13:37:38 GMT -5 msmerymac said:

My infant started daycare last week and I'm so nervous about germs. Three years in!

Ok, so not covid related, but you're going to get so sick for next couple of months. I'm sorry.

[pixy0stix]

My DS was recently diagnosed with social/emotional delays which apparently are common in covid lockdown kids. Except his daycare never shut down. That being said, he didn't have playdates, birthday parties, or anything outside of school, so I wonder if that impacted him.

[waverly]

In terms of being behind, DD is right on track. She was in 1st grade in March 2020.

DS was already behind in fine motor skills and writing. He is even more behind now. He also started being behind in executive function, organization, in school groupwork, and more. He was in 3rd-4th grade during the shut downs.

Both kids had some social anxiety re-entering, but DS had more than DD. Now, watching DD have a big social life in 4th grade, I really see how much DS missed out on even though we did go to the playground often. It's not the same as all the social situations she is now going through.

[msmerymac]

Mar 6, 2023 13:51:16 GMT -5 pixy0stix said:

Mar 6, 2023 13:37:38 GMT -5 msmerymac said:

My infant started daycare last week and I'm so nervous about germs. Three years in!

Ok, so not covid related, but you're going to get so sick for next couple of months. I'm sorry.

This is her 4th day and I figured she’d already be out sick, TBH.

[wanderingback]

We’ve mostly got childcare figured out for the next 6 months with my partner watching her 2 days and a nanny 2 days. Looking for someone to supplement an occasional Friday or Saturday and act as a back up. I just talked to someone on phone and they don’t have flu vaccine or any covid vaccines! At first I thought she meant she just didn’t have covid booster, but nope, has nothing. And she’s already working with 1 family. Oh well, lesson learned, need to ask about that ahead of time. So far of all the people I’ve talked to she’s the only one without it!

[aspentosh]

It's triggering, for sure.

I remember wondering how long it would last (months was my guess, certainly not years) and then trying to come up with alllllllllll the ways to entertain my extremely extroverted only child. We did f*cking EVERYTHING- tie dye, rock painting, reading about tons of animals, learned to skateboard and roller skate, miles long bike rides, etc etc etc. It was exhausting for this introverted parent and so looking back at the pictures and remembering how I felt so broken by life and angry at people that didn't take it seriously... it hurts.

[erbear]

Mar 6, 2023 9:13:56 GMT -5 formerlyak said:

My youngest was in Kinder when things shut down. I’m grateful he got to start Kinder normally. It seems the kids who started Kinder in fall 2020 to varying degrees of hybrid or zoom school are having the most challenges around here. I was talking with one of our school’s Kinder teachers at a community volunteer thing this weekend and she echoed the same observation. My youngest still has some of the meltdowns that happened when schools were closed but they have become far less frequent. He even asked if he could start online Spanish class again, something he did during lockdowns.

My oldest was in 8th grade. For him, there was a lot of social growing up that was missed that summer between 8th and 9th. He and his friends seem to have moved past it, but we did see a lot of the 8th grade pettiness and immaturity happening once schools opened again at the end of 9th and beginning of 10th. A good friend of mine teaches high school and she said there are still days she sees social behavior that is more typical of middle school in her students. It’s not something she saw pre-Covid shutdowns.

I teach 8th in a k-12 school. I see tons of very immature behavior amongst my kids (many are much more like 6th graders academically and behaviorally) but holy crap are the high school kids stunted.

My own kids are ok. DD1 was in 5th and DD2 was in 3rd when Covid started. Both were fortunate to have gone back in person for the 20-21 year, though with lots of restrictions. DD1’s teachers were AMAZING when they were home; DD2’s kinda fell apart and 3rd grade was a wash for those few months. Both are remarkably ok now though.

[sonrisa]

Mar 4, 2023 15:54:39 GMT -5 kitty said:

Lockdown anniversary edition for @ stuff

When our schools shut down in March 2020, my oldest was in 3rd, my middle was in K, and my youngest was in PK3. This year my middle is in 3rd and my youngest is in K and most of the curriculum is the same as their older sib’s. Whenever the teachers mention a project that is coming up for the third trimester, I definitely get triggered remembering trying to do that same assignment at home while also trying to work and entertain my youngest.

Yes!  Same but only the two. Every day of 3rd grade since break last month has been me thinking "at least it isn't all shutting down again" and practically hyperventilating.

[karinothing]

I think my current 5th grader is okay.

My current 2nd grader has some struggles. The world shut down when he was in PreK so he didn't get to complete that. Then Kinder was mostly virtual and when it returned in late April 2021 it was only 2 days a week, it was masked and due to hybrid instruction he only had about 30 minutes of instruction a day. The rest of the day they basically just let them on the playground. Then 21-22 first grade things things weren't really normal. Kids were masked and wild. He really struggled and would just shut down and not respond. We struggled with that again at the beginning of this year but therapy has helped. I think some of it would have happened anyway, but covid likely made things worse. Overall academically the kids all seem very behind. My friend told me that her son's teacher said out of 21 kids, 18 were below goal in reading.

I kept telling myself that the schools were making the right choice, but things are bad here. At this point pretty much every point I know has one kid who is either in therapy or struggling significantly academically or both. 

[mpm]

We went through a global pandemic and are still losing 400+ people a day from it. My young, previously healthy, fit, fully vaccinated friend died leaving two children slightly older than my own without a father. Someone on my team is going to lose her income because she’s used up her disability allowance for long covid and is still unable to work. Another coworker who used to run marathons still gets winded walking up stairs from a covid infection he got in 2021. Those of us still trying to avoid infection are being gaslit from every angle when we try to protect our families because now the world is just pretending that none of that happened. I’d be surprised if most people alive between 2020-now don’t need therapy.

[seeyalater52]

Mar 9, 2023 7:11:28 GMT -5 mpm said:

We went through a global pandemic and are still losing 400+ people a day from it. My young, previously healthy, fit, fully vaccinated friend died leaving two children slightly older than my own without a father. Someone on my team is going to lose her income because she’s used up her disability allowance for long covid and is still unable to work. Another coworker who used to run marathons still gets winded walking up stairs from a covid infection he got in 2021. Those of us still trying to avoid infection are being gaslit from every angle when we try to protect our families because now the world is just pretending that none of that happened. I’d be surprised if most people alive between 2020-now don’t need therapy.

This is how I feel too.

My kid was born in Sept 2020 and I think has been relatively unscathed from the whole experience due to his age. I had a much, much longer maternity leave than I otherwise would have because of the timing (almost 9 full months) and being pregnant during the first stage of covid was terrifying especially with my history. While J is absolutely fine I am beyond traumatized, both by the jarring start to parenting a living child, by the knowledge that this is my only experience having a young kid and every aspect of it was touched by this pandemic, and by the fact that everyone else around us seems content to move on when there is still such a real threat from covid. I am exhausted. My kid is great though, I feel for everyone who navigated this with older kids.

[hermione]

C is in 4th grade. Her first grade year (2020) basically ended in March. I am actually thankful we did virtual school for second grade. We lucked out with an absolutely amazing teacher and I am positive C benefitted from the consistency. If we had opted for in person school, the back and forth of in person and online would have not been good for her.

What I never ever anticipated was COVID turning us into a private school family. I am a public librarian and my husband teaches at an urban public university. Prior to COVID we would never have considered a private school simply because we whole heartedly support public education. For a variety of reasons, we opted private for third grade. The plan was one year. But she loves it, gets straight As, and has tons of friends. I like the smaller class sizes. So here we are.

[mpm]

seeyalater52 I was so anxious after my first was born in 2017. My dad had just been diagnosed with cancer, his treatment required help from my mom and sister that I’d planned on having myself after birth that I didn’t get because my dad needed it more, my birth recovery was hard, my leave was too short, and I didn’t feel empowered to set reasonable limits when I returned to work. When I got pregnant with my second in early 2020 I was looking forward for an opportunity to have a more relaxing do-over where I’d be able to prioritize myself mentally and physically, and rely on the family help I didn’t have the first time, and I feel like I was robbed of that.

My kids are so close though, closer than I remember my sister and I ever being, and I think it has a lot to do with my oldest being home from preschool in 2020 and early 2021 and spending so much time just with each other. My oldest is now in kindergarten and reads her little sister bedtime stories so academically I think she’s just fine. I hope they always have this bond.

[pinkplasticdoll]

My youngest was born right before lockdown. I had a cardiac incident 3 weeks pp right before ventilators were difficult to find, I was fortunate that I had a ventilator available to me. I have a lot of emotion surrounding the first year of my child's life and COVID, I have gone through EMDR to deal with the trauma I experienced. We bonded with our kids as a small family unit because it's all we had, I am fortunate that we spent so much time with the kids and I think their personalities are different because of it(in a good way) . I was worried about the kids falling behind but they are actually ahead of their peers in academics, they are also strong willed and opinionated but that's another topic.

[kitty]

Mar 8, 2023 12:38:56 GMT -5 wanderingback said:

We’ve mostly got childcare figured out for the next 6 months with my partner watching her 2 days and a nanny 2 days. Looking for someone to supplement an occasional Friday or Saturday and act as a back up. I just talked to someone on phone and they don’t have flu vaccine or any covid vaccines! At first I thought she meant she just didn’t have covid booster, but nope, has nothing. And she’s already working with 1 family. Oh well, lesson learned, need to ask about that ahead of time. So far of all the people I’ve talked to she’s the only one without it!

Looking for an after school sitter in 2021 on care/sittercity was a wild ride. I was looking for someone vaccinated and had at least one candidate straight up lie to me about this. I also made it a point to tell any prospects who were middle aged or older or seemed very covid conscious that we would be vaccinating our kids as soon as they were eligible (this search was a few months before they extended it to the 5-11s). I had one older woman send me back a message about how I should reconsider vaccinating my kids and ‘do my research’ on how the vaccine could ‘damage their fragile immune systems.’ And I do live in a blue state!

[chickadee77]

All of what mpm said.

My youngest was 18 months, oldest was in kindergarten. Our lives have completely changed. We have left the state of FL, and are leaving the US - something we've always discussed, but are willing to implement now. I've left my career of 20ish years and am now homeschooling my kids for the foreseeable future and working on building a business.

I am exhausted and disillusioned.

I rarely talk to my family because they have turned into rabid Republican/Trumper/religious wingnuts. I feel like I'm being gaslighted (gaslit?) into oblivion by them and society.