Wednesday Open Letters (a day late)

[macmars45]

I know it's actually Thursday. My week started on Tuesday so it's fake Wednesday today.

Dear students at work,

I know it's rough coming back from a long vacation. We're all doing our best. Next week will be better.

signed,

your very favorite reading teacher

Dear DS,

You are doing amazing at transitioning back to school! I know the structure and routine help you thrive. I'm SO happy we're both back in our routine.

Love,

mom

[librarychica]

Dear self,

Your lack of self-discipline on this project last year has circled back to roost. Just do it. It’s ONE project. Tedious and not your job though it is, it’s 5 hours of work and then it is done. Complete. No longer hanging over your head.

For real. Just do it.

Sincerely,
Not doing it isn’t going to get it done any quicker

[dglvrk2]

Dear Time,
I really wish I had a few more quiet mornings like this one. No kids up yet. Just me an the cat.
Can you slow down?
Signed,
Wishful Thinking dglvrk2

Dear Self,
You have way more time than usual! Pull yourself together. And stop snacking
dglvrk2

[mae0111]

Dear Winter -

Woooo! We are looking at our first real snowfall of the season, and first significant snow we've seen in a couple of years. I'M SO EXCITED!!! And so are my kids - they're dying to try the new sleds that they got for Christmas LAST YEAR!!! So PLEASE don't disappoint and turn into a mostly-rain storm.

Signed -

Clinging to the 4-8in prediction


Dear DD1 -

I'm sorry you're itchy. We will get to the bottom of the hives that are popping up.

Love,
Mom

Dear Parent of DD2's friend and classmate -

You seemed nice on the surface. A little pushy and outspoken, but nice enough. But as our time together went on, and more nonsense spilled out of your mouth, I got more and more suspicious. So I googled you. And OMG the lies you told. Stupid, easily verifiable information. You're weird. But I'll keep my mouth shut because your DD seems sweet and fun and my DD2 likes her.

Signed,
Maybe I'm a stalker but I'm not a liar

[rere]

Dear work,


Whhhhyyyyyy will it take two weeks to paint my area of the building? I want to get settled in my new office and start the new year. I don't mind working from home, but I don't like it full time and I hate zoom meeting where everyone just looks at me, if their cameras are even on.

Signed, quit messing with my routine

Dear Dh,

Just pick a place that meets your standards for our trip. You are pickier than I am. Plus, if I picked it, you would just have a million questions and nitpick it.

Signed, I want to visualize something to look forward to.

[k3am]

Dear self,

After joining the BST groups for skating on FB to look at dresses DD doesn't need yet, I have come to a conclusion. You're poor. There are people out there who bought skates that cost over $1k for their CHILD. Child's age not stated, but weighs 42 lbs and they only wore them for 2 months before growing out of them.

Signed,

THAT'S NUTS.

Dear WP,

You did not talk me out of it. I'm still probably going to buy a cheapish dress and stone it myself at some point. Just for funsies. We don't need it, so if it comes out crappy, who cares? I've wasted money on far stupider things. I came to this conclusion after I did my own gel mani/pedi (which I *hate* doing, but it's so much cheaper than the salon and I'd give myself a solid B/B+ rating) followed by giving DD some fairy strand extensions in her hair.

Signed,
Sucker

[mommyatty]

Dear k3am,

If it gives you a sense of satisfaction, even if it doesn’t spark absolute joy during the process, it’s still worth it in my book.

Signed,
Crafty Crafter With a Low Bar for Joy

Dear Self,

Remember your word for the year is “relax.”

Signed,
Having a Minor Freakout in the Airport Bathroom in Ohio and Not Sure What It’s About

[k3am]

Dear Elfs,

I moved your ass from place to place for an entire 23 days. The least you could do is clean up all my Christmas decorations.

Signed,
Scrooge

[supertrooper1]

Dear cold,

Please go away. I knew I had a high probability of getting sick since Beau was sick last weekend and lots of illnesses have been going around. But I still hate being sick.

Signed,
I have stuff to do

Dear mom,

Yes, I know we need to book our summer camping trips now before everything fills up, but I haven't had the mental energy to sit down and figure out our schedule yet. Plus, I don't know until April when Ex-H will take his two weeks with DS.

Signed,
Not retired with tons of free time.

[186momx]

Dear body
Please stop aching. My low back is killing me right now.
Me who is sitting with an ice pack

Dear software tech support
Please call me sooner than later.
I know you are busy as it is the 4th of January and everyone needs help.
Growing list of items I need help with
stressed payroll person

[dglvrk2]

Dear H,
Allow me to manslplain the defects your mansplaining. You hovering over me at the computer and giving me explicit directions as I pay a medical bill does absolutely nothing positive. It slows down the process because I have to tell you to stop and leave me alone and otherwise aggravates me.

You do not need to tell me to click "pay my bill," "next," or the box next to the statement that my billing address is the same as my mailing address.

I'm a 46 year old professional who has been financially independent and has had perfect credit longer than you have. I've paid 1743 bills in my life. I'm certain I can pay bill 1744 without your explicit instructions.

Oh...and this is precisely why I click out of whatever important thing I'm doing and just go to my Gmail whenever you approach me at my computer.

Your Wife

[twinmomma]

Dear DH,
I really swear you forget that working from home means I'm doing an actual job here all day. No, the middle of the work day is not when I am available to help you put the deck furniture in the garage before it snows. That will be a project for tomorrow, when we're home all day and I don't have to work. Also, stop talking to me about every random thought in your head. Your slow winter season is already driving me insane.
Love,
Wife who is going to shut the door and lock you out of the office