Wednesday Open Letters

[dglvrk2]

What do we want to say this week?

[dglvrk2]

Dear Mother Nature,
You gave us a snow day....now to balance keeping the kids engaged in something besides their devices for part of the day and working from home...
And, thank you for the snow. we need it.
Regards,
WP who is happy to work in leggings, a cozy sweatshirt and sports bra today!

Dear SIL2,
I am sorry the recovery from your C-section is not going well. You asked for suggestions to help the recovery. Honestly, I attribute breast feeding to helping me the most. (This might not be medically sound advice, but I digress.) It gave me some sense of control and helped me bond with DD1 (C-section baby). I really, really wish I was in a position to tell you breast feeding is, overall, what you should be doing, instead of formula feeding, but I'm not. I know you put a lot of thought into you decision to formula feed. We have cultural differences that influenced our decisions and I'm sure you'd be as offended as I would have been should someone give you their thoughts on this issue. So I have to be quiet and tell you to keep taking Tylenol, stay hydrated, get as much rest as possible and reach out to your doctor if you start having symptoms of postpartum depression.
Love,
You big SIL who wishes she could share all of her feelings

[mommyatty]

Dear Jury Service,

I hate you. I was called to serve on Thursday. So I rearranged my entire day only to get an emailing thanking me for doing my online questionnaire and assigning me to a court for Friday. You know, the day I moved all my Thursday stuff to so I could accommodate your request that I be available on Thursday.

Signed,
Annoyed

Dear Self,

Why are you walking around in a fog? You went in from your office, carrying your iPad instead of your coffee cup when you needed more coffee. Came back out for coffee cup, got coffee, came back out but left iPad in the house. What’s up with you today?

Signed,
Foggy McScatterson

Dear Texas Power Grid,

We are forecast to have two days of bitter cold next week. I am seriously considering booking a hotel in a neighboring state for 2 nights in case we need to seek shelter. You suck.

Signed,
Not a Fan

[k3am]

mommyatty, you'll probably get booted from jury duty since they hate having attorneys. Unless of course, you're called for a grand jury, in which case they loved having attorneys.

Dear sisters,

I am driving down 5+ hours on Friday to help clear out mom's house. You both live 30 mins away and have had months (years!) to claim anything that you think it important or want to keep. I am not sentimental - and I am not doing this trip multiple times.

Signed,
Ruthless purger

PS Quit with the stupid "we should save this useless item because of reasons" shenanigans. I'm looking at you oldest sister who has already insisted we save all her ill fitting cloth masks because she might want to brag about them or the bag full of invisalign trays that are (a) really gross and (b) entirely useless because she forget she DID invisalign and never wore the retainer. And yes, I threw that shit out as soon as you went home.

[mommyatty]

k3am- I always do get booted, but never until the bitter end. This one is in civil court, and luckily it’s not a grand jury. That’s my greatest nightmare for jury service! Federal grand jury duty is awful. And long. And there’s no getting out of it.

[186momx]

Dear IEP scheduler
Wow you were not great to work with. A 2:30 meeting is very difficult for me to do. I suggested an 8am no schoolteacher workday and you told me no that teachers have to do teacher meetings not meet with parents. That is BS as we did that last year.
IEP Parent who can't just miss 4 hours a work during my busy season for a 30-minute meeting.

Dear SPED teacher
This is DD's 3-year checkpoint. She should be tested by one the district psychologist. You state her grades and reading scores don't warrant a re-test is just BS. DD's issues aren't easily detected which is why she should be doing a specialized learning curriculum which you haven't done.
Not a happy IEP parent.

Dear Me
Focus
Signed scatterbrained

[librarychica]

Jan 10, 2024 12:07:19 GMT -5 mommyatty said:

k3am- I always do get booted, but never until the bitter end. This one is in civil court, and luckily it’s not a grand jury. That’s my greatest nightmare for jury service! Federal grand jury duty is awful. And long. And there’s no getting out of it.

I knew someone who missed their grandkid’s birth due to federal jury duty!

[waverly]

mommyatty, I got called for grand jury but luckily it was only county level. I was able to get myself dismissed and I was very lucky that the attorney in charge was so flexible.

[librarychica]

Dear H,

I will not be able to enjoy our anniversary celebration this weekend until this house is livable and my work is caught up. I will relax Saturday. Please quit telling me to relax now. If you are concerned, feel free to pick up a bit.

Love,
It doesn’t have to be perfect, just somewhat manageable

[twinmomma]

Dear ExH,
You are infuriating. Our kids have been sick and in your care for three days now. According to you, fevers of 102-103 and coughs. First, you didn't even think to tell me this until I happened to text you something else and you replied with an "oh by the way..." Second, you will not give me any kind of updates on how they are doing unless I call you directly since I found out. Third, I am not "hovering" when I call for a daily update and ask for their temps each time. If we are on day 3 of a fever that high, I am calling the doctor's office. I don't care if you personally don't think it's necessary. I don't care if you think you know better than the doctors and we should ride it out. I don't care if my phone calls are "inconveniencing you" during your work day. I cannot trust that you are doing what's best for them, so I will be all over you to make sure you do. Thank god they come back to my house today.
Signed,
Momma Bear

Dear daughters,
I'm sorry dad made you video call me to "prove you're fine" when you're not feeling well. He should be updating me on his own, as a parent. He should not be pushing it off to you to communicate everything to me as if I'm overreacting. I promise when you get home today I'll make sure you're all set.
Love,
Mom

[dglvrk2]

Jan 10, 2024 12:34:07 GMT -5 186momx said:

Dear IEP scheduler
Wow you were not great to work with. A 2:30 meeting is very difficult for me to do. I suggested an 8am no schoolteacher workday and you told me no that teachers have to do teacher meetings not meet with parents. That is BS as we did that last year.
IEP Parent who can't just miss 4 hours a work during my busy season for a 30-minute meeting.

Dear SPED teacher
This is DD's 3-year checkpoint. She should be tested by one the district psychologist. You state her grades and reading scores don't warrant a re-test is just BS. DD's issues aren't easily detected which is why she should be doing a specialized learning curriculum which you haven't done.
Not a happy IEP parent.

Dear Me
Focus
Signed scatterbrained

In my state, the tri-annual assessments are mandatory, unless parents request an IEP be discontinued. These assessments can help determine next steps and give you empirical and comparable data. If they're denying these assessments after thorough communication with you, I suggest talking to the school principal and district director of student services.

PM me if you want to discuss this further.

[rere]

Dear world,

My office is still not done. I'm packing everything like a transient.

Signed, fix it.

Not dear former boss,

Shut up. Yes I am sitting at the desk of someone who works from home. This is not your property. It's really the company property, which I work Of course you just gripe about it to others because you won't say anything to me.

Signed, Shut up.

[traveltheworld]

Dear MIL,

Offering to pay for BIL and SIL to go on our collective family vacation is your right. It's your money and can you can choose to do whatever you want with it. But truthfully, we are pretty hurt by it. You finance your 45 year old son and his wife's expensive lifestyle, and then tell us how stressed out they are because neither has found their "calling" in life - hence why neither can work right now. But when DH said he can't take more than 2 weeks off work to go on this vacation, you gave him a hard time for being too focused on money. Huh?

Signed,
Annoyed DIL

Dear SIL,

I do not feel like paying $1500 a night for a villa, nor arrange to have a private chef come cook for us multiple night. Stop with these suggestions. We would just opt out, but I know you'd just go on and do them without us, and the whole point of the trip is to spend time together as as extended family and our kids would be confused/unhappy if we didn't actually do things together.

Signed,
Already regretting agreeing to go on this trip

[k3am]

Jan 10, 2024 12:49:33 GMT -5 waverly said:

mommyatty , I got called for grand jury but luckily it was only county level. I was able to get myself dismissed and I was very lucky that the attorney in charge was so flexible.

I got called and stuck on the criminal grand jury at the county level. In 2020, which made it even worse. "Hey, your office is closed because covid is such a terrible threat and you have to work at home and your children are not allowed to go to school for 2 years. But also you have to come do jury duty and sit in close contact with people you've never met before for hours a time. Oh and also, it's winter, so have fun eating lunch, since you're not allowed to sit indoors and all you can get is take out, since there won't be enough time to actually leave the area."  

My takeaways from jury duty:
1. I am still ready to hunt down juror Priyanka, who told me that my "lack of ethics" is the reason society is failing because I voted no on something because I didn't feel it showed criminal intent. Something that a judge later went back and threw out the charges, because they didn't show criminal intent. 
2. I know for a fact that at least two of our jurors were tipsy, if not full on drunk, on several occasions, and one kept falling asleep.
3. I will never serve on another jury. Because they will ask if there's a reason I should be excused, and I will make sure they know that I've done my civic duty. I guaranty that there are people in my next pool who have *never* been called for jury duty, let alone served, and I spent 10 days on jury duty selection for a murder trial, 10 days on a criminal trial jury, and 2+ months on a criminal grand jury. It's someone else's turn. 

[waverly]

k3am , I'm sorry for your experience. I agree you are done for your cvic duty.

This was 2019. This guy was the greatest. He basically overcalls for grand jury, i.e. almost 100 people for 12 gand jury spots and I think 6 alternates. Then speed interviews basically to make sure he "doesn't blow up their life".  Some people volunteered to get out of their jobs- lots of city public school teachers.  

[erbear]

Dear Friend,

I love you. I do. I love your children, and my kid loves your kids. We've been friends for almost 15 years. But jesus, if you cancel on us one more time, we might have to move on -- it's making us all feel bad that we aren't important enough for you to keep plans with us when something better comes along.

Signed, 
Erin, who does not do this to people and who doesn't understand it.

[supertrooper1]

Dear winter illnesses,

I flirted with whatever was going around last week and never really got sick, just tired. And now I have the cold that is going around. Please go away.

Signed,
Too much sinus pressure

Dear division Director,

Why did you not address the elephant in the room yesterday on our monthly call? We were all in the office as our once per month telework agreement states, but nobody brought up the topic that upper management wanted us in the office 2 days per week. I know it's currently been tabled thanks to our union, but why did you not address it? And see above, I probably got my other coworker sick because we had to come into the office and I didn't know I was getting sick.

Signed,
Happier and more productive at home.

[librarychica]

Dear erbear,

Been there. Weird internet hugs.

— Library

[mae0111]

erbear, also been there. It sucks. I'm kind of in the process of letting a 25+ year friendship go, and I'm heartbroken about it. But I'm just so tired of putting in all the effort and getting nothing back. I halfway checked out when she told me that they had to cancel on us on NYE one year (we'd spent every NYE together for 10 years) because her dad fell, and then someone posted a bunch of photos from a party that she attended that night. Just, like, tell us you don't want to come.

I'm tired of the "We should get together!" text from her, because I respond, "Yes! How is next Saturday evening?" and... crickets. So I'm kind of just not responding anymore. This friend does not work, has no kids, and seems to be able to carve out time for literally everyone else in her life but me. So... I'm letting things go.

[waverly]

Sorry y'all. As you know I've had friend issues also.

Friend 1- ghosted me 4 years ago for the tiniest of reasons (I told him coming to my area in the winter wouldn't be the best idea because of the weather). He just sent me a second email wanting to reconnect, which I have also ignored.  It was obviously more on his end- broke up with GF, dated new GF had 2 kids. 

Friend 2- I have no idea what is happening, and following her lead is not giving me any clues. Getting together with them has always been her being very passive and then a million cancellations and life drama on their end. The pandemic caused her to ghost me, she apologized and we are a teeny bit closer but still not friends, and I don't know if she ever wants to get together again or not. I don't want to offer to get together because of the inevitable million cancellations and life drama. I'm not really interested in someone giving me a "don't want to get together right now speech". So I am cowardly avoiding it.

[traveltheworld]

Add me to the ghosted by a friend list. I have this one former colleague/friend who I had morning coffee with every day for a decade. I moved to a different city and the friendship has just fell off. I text her whenever I'm in town to get together, but she always finds one reason or another to not meet up. The worst part is that our kids grew up together and DS still considers her son his best friend, so DS ALWAYS asks why we aren't seeing them.

[186momx]

Dear Weather alerts on my computer
You are making me laugh so hard. We started the morning off with a warning of a foot of snow by Saturday. Then it dropped to 9in and then 6in down to 3in and back up to 5in. The hourly changes are hilarious and I'm hoping we get none including the ice storm that is supposed to roll into tomorrow night.
PNW who wants the snow to stay in the mountains

Add me to the friends that keep ghosting us. Mine I'm giving some slack because the year hasn't been good to them medically. DD is dealing with this at both school and gym and doesn't know who her friends are anymore.

[mommyatty]

Dear Jury Service,

Now you are NEXT FRIDAY? I hate you.

Signed,
Potential Juror

[rere]

Dear State Farm,

You suck. Two roofers have confirmed that we have hail damage. You are saying that we have damage on trim and ventilation, but the pings on the roof is wear and tear. So conveniently, our damage is below the deductible. Now you are sending an engineer. Yes my roof is 20 yrs old. But it had 10 yrs left in the life, so we should get some portion covered. So did I turn you into the Department of Insurance, yes I did. Will it do anything, idk.

Dear WP,

If you have State Farm, run. After talking to contractors, neighbors, and a Google search, State Farm is terrible about paying out for damages, specifically roofing.

[mommyatty]

Dear rere,

It matters what state you are in. We are in Texas. State Farm won’t sell homeowners insurance here anymore because we have too many hail claims, but if you already were a customer they kept you. So here they’re awesome because brokers love having us as customers, and if they lose us they can’t replace us.

Signed,
I hate insurance

[dglvrk2]

Dear DD2,

I love that you asked for your spaghetti (lunch for today) to be in a "flask," not just a plastic container. Girl, I want something in a flask too!

Rest assured, your spaghetti is in a flask....I mean thermos.

And I LOVE that you know the word flask. You're clearly your mom's daughter!

Mom

[mae0111]

mommyatty, rere, homeowners insurance is the WORST. When we bought our beach house, we had a terrible time trying to find someone to cover us. Carriers just... stopped insuring in the entire 50+mile area. Our insurance agent, who has been great, was able to find us coverage for over $8K, but ONLY if we moved our entire portfolio to that carrier. That carrier wanted to double our primary home insurance as well.

It's so strange - we are a mile from the water, and well above sea level and not in a flood zone. My parents live .4 miles from the Atlantic and were just sending me photos of their flooded backyard yesterday after some storms. My sister lives in the same town and is routinely trapped in her home when the main street that leads out of their neighborhood floods. But their areas are insurable!

[k3am]

rere , When our fence was damaged, our insurance had us send pictures, looked it up on google earth, told us how much they'd pay out if we filed a claim, and we had the amount direct deposited within a week of us filing the claim. Our neighbors that we share a fence with have State Farm. They required an adjuster to come out, but they didn't have any available so they flew someone in from Texas, we had to get 3 quotes for repair, and they paid significantly less than our insurance did. And by the time we could START work, no one could do the work. So we had no fence between our houses - and them with a pool! - for over 3 months.

Highly recommend Nationwide - it was our first HO claim, but they were also great with the two car accident claims we worked with them on.