Wednesday Open Letters

[twinmomma]

Happy Valentine's Day! 

[twinmomma]

Dear daughters,
I already feel some feelings about you being big enough to borrow my shoes. I feel even more feelings about you borrowing my shoes and then leaving them at your dad's house so that I can't wear them. But I feel the MOST feelings about you borrowing my shoes, forgetting them at dad's house, and then telling me that your dad's girlfriend (who he cheated on me with and left me for) wore them for a date night the other day. Please bring my shoes back before I have a meltdown over all this?
Thanks,
Mom

Dear WPs,
I think I want a new tattoo. It would be a small line drawing of a bouquet of flowers for my birth month and the girls birth month. It's very simple and not very big. I already have two tiny tattoos right now, one on the top of each foot so they're easily hidden. The new one I want would be on my inner forearm, so much more obvious. Tattoos don't matter even a little bit in my professional life so I have no concerns there. But it feels so much more "real" to get a tattoo where people will see it all the time. I'm not sure I'm brave enough to do it!
Signed,
Wimpy

[mae0111]

Dear twinmomma -

WTAF is wrong with that woman that she would wear your shoes? That’s such a weird thing to do.

Also… go for it! I wish I had the guts to get a tattoo. I hate needles so much. I don’t even have my ears pierced.

Mae

Dear DD2 -

Thank you for helping me shovel. It wasn’t a lot of snow, but it was so wet and heavy. You pushed and I lifted. Saved me a ton of time. Thank you!!

Love,
Mom

Dear DD1 -

I know you’re a teenager and you’re supposed to challenge me. But I’m worn out. Can you take it easy on me this week? You may resume shenanigans next week.

Thank you!

Love,
Tired mom

[vasc]

twinmomma I’d burn those shoes.

[polecat8]

Dear DS1,
You did an awesome job making a Valentine's box that beeps when a valentine is put in it. Daddy told me that you designed and built it all by yourself. You are definitely going to be an engineer someday!

Love,
Your nerdy engineer momma

[dglvrk2]

twinmomma, I'd insist that the girlfriend keep the shoes, just to make things awkward for her and your ex. Get new shoes AND the new tattoo!!

Dear Monday and Tuesday,
How is it that you were only two days? You felt like a month.
This Lady...

Dear Anxiety,
You're effing killing me. An you're only in my head!
You're like the bad boyfriend who won't leave my life. Get out!
Not Love,
Dglvrk2

[mustardseed2007]

twinmomma, WTF!!!!!!!!

[rere]

twinmomma, I'd tell her you're welcome, and never see those shoes again.

Dear Ds

I love that you want to talk to me about your relationship. I am asleep at 10:44pm, but glad we could talk this morning. I hope I gave good advice and made it better.

Love mom

Dear Ds,

I'm excited that you are so excited to come home and hang out! I've got cookies and pizza and candy coming.

Love mom

[librarychica]

Dear DD1,

Your father and I are not fighting. We have never celebrated Valentine’s Day. Well, we did once but it was the one time and it was 18 years ago. We show our love by putting up with a great deal of nonsense from one another. This is a funny thing to worry about this morning.

Love,
Mama

Dear H, my darling tinkerer,

Did we really need another 3D printer? Where are you going to put it? Your workbench is bursting. You better 3D print me something useful!

Love,
We are going to need to move somewhere there’s room for a workshop

[186momx]

twinmomma, WTF
Now I actually don't mind sharing shoes/clothes with DD. She takes really good care of stuff so it works out well for both of us. The new top I have on today I think will become DD's. It is just a little too short for my own liking.

Dear uncle from Ohio
I can't wait to see you at the end of the month. Yes DD is taking mental health days while you are here so she can see you. You haven't seen her since her 4th b-day. I find it hilarious that driving over to the coast was a no go because you aren't comfortable driving over the mountains. I know Ohio is flat but the coast range mount is really more a good size hill with an elevation of 750ft than an actual mountain. I promise DD is a good navigator and you do have GPS in my car.
Laughing niece

Dear DH
All I asked for my birthday is a Dairy Queen ice cream cake. Please get me cake that I like.
Birthday girl

Dear family
I'm annoyed at you but going along with the plans because it works for everyone but me. It only doesn't work for me because it forces me to have to work my actual birthday instead of Saturday. If I don't work Sunday next week is going to be a disaster and I really don't want a full disaster all week so the lesser evil is working my birthday.
Cranky birthday girl

DD
You were so stinking excited about me putting together a Valentines Day bag for you. I normally don't but I'm so glad that I did this year.
Love Mom

[k3am]

twinmomma, I don't envy you. DD is creeping closer and closer to my shoe size.. my 10 year old wears an 8.5 already! And I am dreading the day. But yeah.. those shoes are gone. WHO DOES THAT?!?!

Dear sister,

I know you want to get the most out of mom's possessions that we're letting go but.. stop. You are burning yourself out. All we need to do at this point is get everything in the garage, HIRE someone for a deep clean (not you doing it yourself!!) and get the house listed and sold ASAP. You are doing your brain and body in by trying to take it all on and doing too much. It's not worth it.

Signed,
I love you.

Dear Mom,

I felt pretty confident in moving you into memory care. And now I'm not, but not for the normal reasons. The weekend you moved in, I wasn't sure you'd make it more than a few months. And now you have... a routine. And are eating regular meals. And walking SO MUCH BETTER than you have in years. You look healthy and ALIVE. Your bad ass even managed to beat off all the other women and snag one of the few men in the center to be your BF and snuggle buddy (how does that even work when both of you have dementia? Do you get reintroduced daily!?!?). And now I'm worried that the 14 months we have remaining on insurance plus the house proceeds won't be enough.

Signed,
Feeling happy and like an asshole about writing that paragraph.

[supertrooper1]

Happy Valetine's Day!

twinmomma, even if she wasn't the mistress, I still couldn't bring myself to wear those shoes again. That is gross.

Dear Beau,
Thank you for the Starbucks this morning, even if I had to tell you last night that it would be something I would appreciate after you said you forgot it was Valentine's Day. I don't expect you to go all out, but little gestures like that are nice. And I hope your DIL appreciates me reminding your son too, lol.
Love,
Supertrooper

[twinmomma]

Feb 14, 2024 8:26:54 GMT -5 mae0111 said:

Dear twinmomma -

WTAF is wrong with that woman that she would wear your shoes? That’s such a weird thing to do.

Also… go for it! I wish I had the guts to get a tattoo. I hate needles so much. I don’t even have my ears pierced.

Mae

Well, if by "woman" you mean 24 year old girl.... That probably explains the lack of awareness around how weird this is. I'm practically old enough to be her mom. 

[k3am]

Feb 14, 2024 12:00:57 GMT -5 twinmomma said:

Nope, still doesn't explain it, so don't give her a pass based on age. I know plenty of 24 year olds who know how to function in society and what is/isn't acceptable. Is this the same one with mental health issues?

[twinmomma]

k3am, Yup, same one! They were engaged, broke up, she moved out, now they're dating again and she moved back in a couple weeks ago. Never a dull moment!

[186momx]

Dear DD
I'm sorry school was a drag today and you felt left out of the love not having a boyfriend. I'm also sorry your two school BFF are ditching you to sit with the Queen Bee and the popular girls. I think you should take up the counselor's advice and go to one of the lunch clubs. I know they aren't really your thing but it has to be better than sitting alone at lunch.
Mom

WPs
The main custodian sat with DD today during lunch when her friends ditched her. Only X number of chairs at each table so she was the last man out. At least her friends didn't steal her lunch from home today.
Middle school is just hard
186momx

[k3am]

Dear WP,

Random question.. has anyone given their dog immunotherapy for allergies? My mongrel is apparently allergic to the world, and certainly all kinds of grass, many weeds, a few trees, and fungi according to the testing we had done. The vet suggests immunotherapy, either sublingual drops or an injection. Drops would be 2x/day long term. Injection would be every 4 days for 10 injections and then once every 2-3 weeks. Cost is roughly the same. (Injections are actually cheaper, but once we factor in insurance, the difference is negligible.)

The idea of an injection gives me the heebie jeebies, but DH likes that it’s less maintenance. The dog doesn’t care, he will put up with anything we do to him. The vet is not leaning one way or another. Anyone want to decide for me?

Signed,
I hate decisions.

[waverly]

Feb 14, 2024 21:33:00 GMT -5 k3am said:

Dear WP,

Random question.. has anyone given their dog immunotherapy for allergies? My mongrel is apparently allergic to the world, and certainly all kinds of grass, many weeds, a few trees, and fungi according to the testing we had done. The vet suggests immunotherapy, either sublingual drops or an injection. Drops would be 2x/day long term. Injection would be every 4 days for 10 injections and then once every 2-3 weeks. Cost is roughly the same. (Injections are actually cheaper, but once we factor in insurance, the difference is negligible.)

The idea of an injection gives me the heebie jeebies, but DH likes that it’s less maintenance. The dog doesn’t care, he will put up with anything we do to him. The vet is not leaning one way or another. Anyone want to decide for me?

Signed,
I hate decisions.

I have not but my dog decided to stop taking her antibiotics. So I wonder if she would give me trouble with the drops. Not saying she would like the injections but I feel like we could immobilize her but with the drops she would try to spit them out or wouldn’t open her mouth.

[statgirl]

Feb 14, 2024 21:33:00 GMT -5 k3am said:

Dear WP,

Random question.. has anyone given their dog immunotherapy for allergies? My mongrel is apparently allergic to the world, and certainly all kinds of grass, many weeds, a few trees, and fungi according to the testing we had done. The vet suggests immunotherapy, either sublingual drops or an injection. Drops would be 2x/day long term. Injection would be every 4 days for 10 injections and then once every 2-3 weeks. Cost is roughly the same. (Injections are actually cheaper, but once we factor in insurance, the difference is negligible.)

The idea of an injection gives me the heebie jeebies, but DH likes that it’s less maintenance. The dog doesn’t care, he will put up with anything we do to him. The vet is not leaning one way or another. Anyone want to decide for me?

Signed,
I hate decisions.

My in-laws’ dog has to have injections for arthritis. They have one person (my H) hold her still while my FIL jabs. Both say it is easier than pills (my H wants our dog to move to injections because he cannot pill him—I get the honors).

[rere]

186momx I hate this. Middle and high school is so rough. Both Ds and Dd transfered from private to public schools for high school. I remember being on pins and needles through their lunch period the first few days wondering if they had people to sit with. Of all the things to worry about, that was top of the list.

[186momx]

k3am, my old dog gets a librala shot every 4-6 weeks for her arthritis. I can't buy the shots and give them to her myself, so we have to make a vet tech visit. Can you switch between drops and shots or is it a forever decision? Do the drops go in his food? If this is the case that is easy to just add to your routine.

[k3am]

186momx , I'm not sure about switching between the two. The drops go in his mouth. He is high maintenance. Whatever ear protocol we happen to be in (where we always screw it up. Sometimes we're cleaning his ears daily, sometimes twice a week. Sometimes not for 30+ days. Sometimes we're treating an infection in one or both ears, sometimes once a day, sometimes twice.) Paws wiped twice a day, foam in his paws twice a day, medicated paw washes twice a week, medicated baths once a week. And he's a doodle, so those baths/blow-drys take forever. Monthly cytopoint (tech visit), daily apoquel (hit or miss if he gets it.)

Our success rate on doing everything exactly as we're supposed to is not great. So lower frequency shots sound ideal. Hopefully the allergy issues start to clear up with this treatment and his maintenance down significantly.

My dog is clearly the poster child for why you need to buy insurance on your pets, especially if you buy a pet not knowing what you're doing. 

[mommyatty]

k3am- I think you just cured me of wanting a doodle. Holy crap, and I thought it was bad we have to give our cat children’s Claritin chewable obce a day and the heart worm/flea/tick/mosquito/whatever drops on the neck once a month.

Dear Son,

Please have good days at the school you’re visiting today and tomorrow. It might be our only option other than public school or homeschool with a tutor.

Signed,
Mom

Dear DD’s School,

You’ve had a month to tell us if you’ll take DS. What the actual fuck? This is absolutely ridiculous. I don’t give you shit tons of money to be treated like a stranger applying to the school.

Sincerely,
Ms Money Bags Who Will Stop Giving You Money if You Don’t Take My Kid Back

[k3am]

mommyatty, it's the allergies. He was not so high maintenance for the first year. Allergies don't really develop until 1-3 years. We've been battling through for about 1.5 years. Doodles don't come near the top of list for being prone to allergies, he just got screwed. We know so many doodles that didn't come with the lovely allergy.

Any doodle will need at least weekly ear cleaning though. And the bathing/grooming needs will suck for any doodle.

He really is the best boy, which is his saving grace. It's almost par for the course with my family/luck - neither of my kids have had it easy on the health front either. We joke about our preferred member status at Kaiser. It's one of the reasons we were solid in our choice to stop after DS was born.

[mae0111]

Jumping on the ridiculous doodle ailments bandwagon.

My dog is an Australian Cobberdog, which is a poodle/lab/cocker spaniel and other stuff mixed in but a very specific breeding line - trying to get recognized by AKC as an official breed - but truly just a designer mutt.

He is allergic to chicken. CHICKEN. It’s in EVERYTHING. And then he reacted terribly to other options, got really sick, and now he is on a prescription diet of hydrolyzed protein based food that is made of rabbit. It smells terrible.

He is constantly getting ear infections.

He is loaded with moles and cysts. He just had surgery last week to remove 2 huge cysts and is still in a cone. He has NO CHILL so the very second we take off the cone to give him a break, he chews the stitches. He popped them within a week.

But omg he is such a love.

100% go with the lowest maintenance option. Injections FTW.

[sdlaura]

I still need to make a decision on the pet insurance! It’s so hard because we had no issues with our previous Scottie that would have been worth the cost.

[dglvrk2]

Feb 16, 2024 0:02:28 GMT -5 sdlaura said:

I still need to make a decision on the pet insurance! It’s so hard because we had no issues with our previous Scottie that would have been worth the cost.

A college friend of mine who is a veterinarian says most plans are rip-offs. She said we are better off putting a set amount of $$ aside each month for future pet expenses.

I've always had large, traditional breed pups (springer spaniels and labs) and she's a golden retriever mom, so that's where we are coming from as pet parents, FWIW

[k3am]

sdlaura, you can always get it and keep it for a year or two and cancel in the future. We were in the 1-1.5 age range when most of our dog's problems started. But once you HAVE an issue before you have insurance, any future issues of the same kind wouldn't count. So if we hadn't had insurance at his first ear infection, not a single ear infection would be covered if we got insurance afterwards.

I hadn't viewed it in terms of ongoing conditions. I was thinking injuries and/or cancer when the dog was old, where I'd be deciding if it was worth the cost for a few more years. Instead I'm thinking.. can I stand his itching keeping me up all night every night?

[k3am]

Dear sister,

I’m sorry the garage sale isn’t working out the way you hoped. And sorry that you’re learning about the pitfalls of scams the hard way by trying to sell stuff on marketplace over something stupid like $5 cross stitch squares.

Signed,
Writing this here because it’s taking everything in my power not to say I told you so.