It's Monday!

[mae0111]

How was the weekend?  What's up this week?

[mae0111]

I started off Monday by turning off my alarm instead of hitting snooze, and then falling back to sleep for 45 mins. Oops. At least I had set it really early and I don't have to get anyone to school today!

We had a pretty good weekend, apart from a couple of minor meltdowns. I started off Friday by waiting an extra 15 mins outside of school because DD2 FORGOT that it was time to go and was hanging out in her classroom drawing on the dry erase board... so that was annoying. Saturday DD2 and I went to an animal shelter near my parents' house to donate all of the gifts from her birthday party last weekend. It was really hard to leave there without putting in an application for another dog... omg... Then we hung out with my dad for a bit, and then DH and I coached DD2's indoor soccer game that evening (another mess of a game, but better than the week before).

Sunday was DD2's birthday. Nothing crazy though since her party was the weekend before. So she asked for pancakes for breakfast and we went out to dinner at a local bar and grill, and in between she and I took the dog for another long walk. Then we watched the US v Brazil soccer game.

This week is weird. The kids are on vacation, but since public school is still in session, they have all of their activities. So DD1 has PT, DD2 has soccer later. DD2 has a scrimmage on Thursday and 4 games this weekend to kick off the spring outdoor season while still playing in the winter indoor season. DD1 and DH are going to visit MIL on Friday for the weekend, so it will be quiet here. In between, I'll take a few hours off work here and there to do some fun things with the kids (hopefully... if they can get along...)

ETA: I just found out that my dad's last remaining sibling passed away last night (he had 4 sisters and a brother, and he's the only one left).  She was... not a nice person.  My dad's relationship with his siblings was complicated at best, and nonexistent with this sister.  But everyone else in the family thought her nastiness was "cute" and just a sign of old age... nope, she was always that way.  So now we've got the wake/funeral this week, and it's just so... complicated.  I have no sad feelings about losing this aunt.  I feel bad for her kids, my cousins, who have a complicated relationship with one another... and I'm sad for my dad that his siblings are gone... and I'm going to have to tell him... but mostly I'm just anxious about any possible unpleasantness at the upcoming services.

[rere]

Great but short weekend. The birthday party was not canceled and it was a lot of fun. Great band and most of our friends were there.

I've decided to reduce my carbs even if my blood work wasn't something to worry about, so Sunday had a lot of meal prep. Dad and grandpa had diabetes and dad had to go into a nursing facility at 53. He did not take care of himself at all, but I'm not messing with diabetes, and with that family history, I've decided to be proactive.

This us going to be a rough week. Ds sent me a picture of him hanging out of a helicopter in full gear in the Mojave Desert and Dd landed in the Dominican yesterday and we can't talk to her for a week. This kids growing up business isn't for the weak.

[mommyatty]

mae0111, what if you just don’t go to any service? Unless you feel like your dad needs you there, I think I would suddenly get a terrible and highly contagious bug.

The weekend was hard for me. We went to a birthday party for a friend of DS’s who goes to DD’s school (the school that just rejected him). And I’m really mourning that loss of community for him. He had so many friends there and he played and laughed and ran and had so much fun. Ableism just sucks. The hardest thing for an autistic kid is finding a community, and he got rejected by a community we spent years building. Yesterday DS had a friend over, also from that school. They had a great time.

This week is Spring Break. We have a ton of Dr appointments and I would like to get haircuts for the kids. Maybe do fun things like mini golf if we can a couple of afternoons.

[mae0111]

mommyatty, would you ever try again at DD's school? See how he does at his current school, and if you feel like the community isn't there, would you apply him again? I don't know what the answer is, and I hear you with mourning the loss of the community - I felt that in a big way when my kids' last school went from awesome to really bad really quickly. It sucks, and it's heartbreaking.

As far as the services, I was planning to attend for my cousin. The services are for the living, and I have two cousins (out of 25) that have really tried hard to maintain a relationship with me. This aunt is one cousin's mom. So I feel like I should go and show my support, but there are lots of other people that I don't want to see. So maybe I'll try to show up early and get out of there quickly.

[macmars45]

Weekend went by quickly. Saturday we had dinner with friends at their house. The kids had a good loud time and us adults chatted. Sunday I had a native plant expert come to my house and give me ideas for how to turn my outside space into a less water needy space by using native plants that do well in extreme heat with little water.

Work will be busy and good all week. No school Friday for a teacher work day. I'm a para so I don't work that day.

[waverly]

Trigger Warning- Death


















Trigger Warning- Child death






















A 7th grader in our school passed away last week. They collapsed in gym class from an undiagnosed heart issue that you see sometimes with young athletes usually in high school or college. DS played basketball with him last year, but otherwise was not super close to him. That poor gym teacher who was also the basketball coach for them last year. Some of the kids went to say goodbye with some of the dads, and the family set up a vigil that they livestreamed to the student. He passed on Friday, and the middle school told all the students and then sent them home, and the superintendent sent out the email to everyone. DS is doing OK almost better than me because it is just so sad. I am doing a bit better today. Visitation and funeral this week. I feel so bad for the parents. DS did not attend the vigil and actually didn't know what a vigil was. I'll ask about visitation, but I think he will decline to go, so we will see. But I will offer. DS said I am OK, but my classmates are not.

[mommyatty]

mae0111- I don’t know that I would. The head of school suggested that we do that “next year,” but I don’t see trusting my child to an institution that lied to me and discriminated against my kid for his disability. Not only am I not considering reapplying for him, I’m considering pulling DD after next year. She’s LGBTQ, and I cannot imagine leaving DS in a school that said to us, “DD is too much of a distraction because a lot of boys like her and she doesn’t like them back.” So I cannot imagine leaving her in a school where their concerns were, and I quote “He expressed concerns over not knowing what they were doing in math in a way a neurotypical child would not have. He wasn’t disruptive or anything, but it seemed to stress him out” and “he did well on the reading test but he flapped his hands and said he would prefer a multiple choice formate” (a multiple choice format was part of his IEP, btw).

[sandandsea]

We were split again this weekend with ds2 and I at home and ds1 and Dh at a race. Ds2 had his first soccer game this season in Saturday and played great, got 2 goals and looked so good! I was happy for him as he doesn’t always play with zeal and he totally did Saturday. Ds2 got crashed Sunday and hurt his wrist. It doesn’t hurt to bend or twist but hurts to put weight on it so we will see how today goes at school and might have to get X-rays afterschool. He and Dh say it’s fine and that I’m being ridiculous so maybe we won’t. I’m glad it’s not a serious injury but it makes it hard to know if it’s worth a visit and xray and hours of our evening and being behind on homework and all of the hassle or not. Idk. I hate not knowing what to do.

[supertrooper1]

We had a good weekend. Friday after I dropped DS off at his dad's, Beau and I grabbed drinks and dumplings. Saturday was DS's birthday party. Everyone seemed to have fun running around playing arcade games and eating pizza. My parents stopped by our house after the party and then we hung out with DS until I had to take him back to his dad's. Sunday, Beau and I slept in, lounged around, and I got some little things done that I had been putting off, like registering the kitten's microchip and gathering my tax documents.

Not too bad of a week ahead so far. My once per month in office day is Wednesday and I'm already dreading it.

[sdlaura]

mae0111 sorry for your family's loss/your having to deal with family stuff because of the service.

waverly that's terrible. So sad for the family and school. Death from undiagnosed heart issues is a huge fear of mine after we have a history of heart defects in our babies and DS2 had to have open heart surgery as a baby. A kid from our community who had gone to our elementary school passed away while wakeboarding this past summer, also from a heart issue, and he also drowned as a result of it.

mommyatty, wow. Yes, we would no longer be at that school for either kid.

sandandsea I'm so embarrassed to have never asked this before - but what kind of racing does your DS1 do? I assumed dirt bikes but can't recall.

[sandandsea]

sdlaura he does karting. Like what all the F1 drivers did as kids…he won’t ever drive in F1 but he loves it.

[sdlaura]

I'm working in the office today, which I did not expect to be doing a week post tummy tuck surgery. I was planning to WFH for another day, but then I realized it was cleaning lady day. She only comes twice a month, and our house is not big, so I try to stay out of her way. My office is only another 10 minutes down the road from dropping off my preschooler, and I have a pretty comfortable set-up, so I decided to just come in. It felt good to get ready and put on makeup for the first time in a week. I'm feeling pretty good overall. I only left the house once this weekend, to take DS2 to the library because he was driving me nuts Saturday afternoon. I mostly just sat there while he did the monthly scavenger hunt. I watched DD's softball tournament on our living room TV yesterday, cast through gamechanger. I ended up moving around this weekend more than I would have liked, but what can you do - four kids...

The kids' 7 sporting events this weekend went well. DH and my parents took them to everything - usually one kid at a time while I had the others at home. I was OK to supervise the kids at home, and would have been ok sitting in a chair at a sporting event, but wasn't up for chasing my little boys around a sports field or lifting them on the monkey bars at the playground while their sibling played, so that's why I stayed home with them instead.

This week is pretty busy, and my parents flew back to the East coast today But we were lucky to have their help as long as we did, and we're meeting my sister's family near Charleston, SC and then flying to Maryland to spend Easter weekend with both sides of the family in two weeks for spring break, so we'll see them again soon. Tonight I take DD to a flag football scrimmage and DS2 to gymnastics while DH has DS1 at baseball and then picks up DS3 - and most of the week will have those kinds of logistics.

[sdlaura]

sandandsea that's so cool!

[eport]

waverly
I'm so sorry to hear that about the kid at school. I will keep the whole community in my prayers. My family got extremely lucky that my brother's issue was caught rather early. He was in his mid 20s and training to attempt to make the US Olympic Trials in the marathon (so 100 mile training weeks). He fainted at a non-athletic event due to dehydration and his doc took it way seriously and ran a ton of tests, which is how he got a pacemaker at 24. It's an athletic heart and is crazy how it goes from never knowing to heartbreaking in an instant.My bro is now a high school coach and really pushes for his athlete's health concerns be taken seriously and uses himself as an example with parents to explain why.

It was that same year that an athlete died during the Olympic trails for the marathon. I didn't know that runner but his death haunts me based on my brother's experience. www.letsrun.com/news/2017/10/digging-deep-legacy-ryan-shay-ten-years-death-olympic-marathon-trials/

[186momx]

sandandsea, my cousin started driving stock cars at the age of 13. He still is racing as an adult and has an amazing paying job as a welder to feed his racing habit.

mommyatty, I think you should start shopping around for a new school all the together. DD's public K-8 school has an LGBTQ lunch club and has a district wide PRIDE club that meets as a district a few times a year on ways to help make everyone feel included and welcomed.

I'm having a Monday. Didn't sleep great and I'm overtired with a nasty headache. Came in and updated my payroll software like I do every day hoping the update with fix some of the bugs and it locked me out and said I wasn't registered. Spent the next 3 hours redialing the company to give me the stinking key code. The only upside is I have acupuncture at 4.

[twinmomma]

I'm in paradise and gearing up for all the guests to start descending on us today. Weather is great and it seems like things are going to be fairly smooth this year (fingers crossed!)

mommyatty, I'd totally shop around for both of them! Sounds like that place is starting to show its true colors and they're not good.

[waverly]

eport, DS also has a slower heartbeat. He has no symptoms so they haven't discussed a pacemaker yet. But definitely something to keep an eye on. I think this was the first check up where it appeared slower than 60. The other ones were above that. We go every 2 years for all the tests/ imaging. After his cardiology appointment I followed up with the pediatrician who did a stress test and we discussed conclave chest. Neither the cardiologist or pediatrician seemed concerned at this point.

[eport]

Mar 12, 2024 10:44:35 GMT -5 waverly said:

eport, DS also has a slower heartbeat. He has no symptoms so they haven't discussed a pacemaker yet. But definitely something to keep an eye on. I think this was the first check up where it appeared slower than 60. The other ones were above that. We go every 2 years for all the tests/ imaging. After his cardiology appointment I followed up with the pediatrician who did a stress test and we discussed conclave chest. Neither the cardiologist or pediatrician seemed concerned at this point.

I think my brothers resting heart rate was like low 30s (not anymore). Glad they are keeping an eye on it. The test that got everyone's attention was a tilt table test where they basically made him faint to see how long it would take the heart to restart. The answer was too long. Apparently they pulled out the paddles but he came too before the shock.
He is still in good health, though he never trained like that again. He is also a good advocate for his runners' health.

[waverly]

eport, wow that is low. DS's was in the high 50's where 60 is the low end of the range.

Tilt table test, interesting. DS has never fainted, that kind of sound dangerous to see how long it would take the heart to restart. I'm sure all was fine in the end for your brother, but that kind of stuff makes me nervous. We stopped DS's heart for one of the images, but it was restarted right away so basically 1 beat. And now that they have the images, I think I would tell them no for that again.

[k3am]

We listed my mom's house on Friday. I thought a good listing price was $850k, but the realtor convinced us into $825k.

We have 11 offers. The highest is for $950k, the second highest for $900k. Both have 20% down, would require completing but waiving inspections, and supposedly have enough cash to be okay if the house doesn't appraise high enough. I'm not working directly with the realtor and my sister is a terrible texter (all voice to text, no proof reading), so I don't know all the details, but I'm cautiously optimistic. We'll have to pay a shit ton in capital gains taxes, but it will go a LONG ways towards keeping her happy in memory care with her little boyfriend.

[k3am]

And womp womp. The realtor sent a draft listing to us and one of the highlights is.. OWNED SOLAR!!!!!

I asked my sister about it because.. I didn't think it was owned. I pay a sunrun invoice monthly. I forwarded it to my sister before the listing went live and she was supposed to follow up with the realtor. I assumed she had and that it was basically considered "owned" once purchased because the loan would be paid off with proceeds. It's leased. It's on year 3 of a 25 year term. Hopefully it doesn't screw things up too much.

[waverly]

k3am , I don't know. The solar was a problem for us because they had a 20 year lease with no option to cancel the lease and it went to the new buyers when they sold. We definitely did not want to pay for a 20 year lease because it was JUST installed so they could have waited and not done it if they knew they were selling. So now they are selling with the lease attached, and we weren't interested as buyers. DH was looking at rental properties not a primary residence.

Year 3 of a 25 year term does not sound like owned to me. Who is responsible for paying that bill when the property is sold?

[k3am]

waverly, sister now reports that the potential buyer knows it's a lease and not owned. It's like a $50-75/month payment (it's on autopay, so I don't know the exact amount, but pretty negligible) they'll be responsible for and cheaper than the amount they'd pay to buy electricity from PGE (but definitely not enough solar to offset the entire PGE bill)

[186momx]

I just found out that the highway I need to take to get DD to her meet this weekend is closed for construction. The alternate route will add 30+ minutes to our drive. It is a rural Hwy that goes through all the small towns, UGH.

I'm also ready to fire a payroll client. They are being nasty and demanding and I'm really over people. They don't want to take the time to do it themselves and want me to deal with it but then get upset/nasty when I don't jump fast enough. They are also taking advantage of tax season and are demanding payroll over the weekends. It just is a little much and my own patience level is at a zero.

[k3am]

WE HAVE A BUYER AT $950k!!!! I am so relieved!!