First August Monday

[mommyatty]

I can’t believe it’s August. DS goes back to school next Wednesday and DD the week following. Damn it.

How was everyone’s weekend? What does this week look like?

[campermom]

PDQ
Currently sitting in the child support enforcement office due to a man who has so much money he lives in a multimillion dollar home and just returned from a 2 week European cruise.

He’s 4 days late and this is the 4th time in less than a year.

I’m not f-ing around.

[waverly]

Block party was a blast on Saturday. I invited a friend for DD which turned out amazing because 2 girls hung out together, then the third sort of went in between, and then DD and her friend hung out together and sometimes in the group.  DS also had a friend to hang out with.  

I invited 1 group of my friends which was slightly awkward but also amazing. Awkward, because they didn't sit or eat anything so we stood and talked and then they went to their next event. They are great conversationalist, well spoken, great to see them.

I also got to talk to two neighbor friends which was awesome.  

I invited the acquaintences that I had been having issues with for a few years. They came late, tried to get out of the party, and wanted to borrow a high priced item. We weren't using it, so DH let them borrow it (I wouldn't have). But it was very much like we came to borrow this item, and don't really care about you people. There are likely mental health issues at play, so that is why I haven't completely cut them off, but they are solidly in the "talk to once a year, acquaintence" now. Due to the mental health issues, they are completely disinterested in anything unless it benefits them or is about them.  Show no real excitement in general, no real interest in anyone but themselves.  DH is interested in keeping them very terciary in our lives, so I will faciliate a 1 time per year meet up and that is it.  

[mae0111]

Ugh good luck campermom.

mommyatty, my kids don't officially go back until after Labor Day, but we have so much stuff jammed into this month that I'm already getting anxious about back to school things. Our last 2 weeks of August are filling up and I'm getting annoyed - I want one last hurrah at the beach house before the back to school/sports/activities madness starts!!

The weekend was nice! DH and DD1 left for their annual camping trip on Friday. DD2 slept until noon and then had a friend over to swim for a few hours, and we ran errands that evening. Saturday she went to her BFF's house with a couple of sisters - the same group of families/kids that we hung out with on vacation - and later in the afternoon they all came here while BFF"s mom went to an appointment. While she was gone I started a full cleanout of my office, including my ridiculously overstocked school supply closet.

Yesterday I cleaned for a few hours since my cleaning person is away for a month. Then we went to my parents' to hang out with them, my sister, and nieces. We'd planned to go to the beach but some storms rolled in when we got there.

Today is up in the air. My sister keeps making and changing plans so I don't think our plan to hang out today is happening. We have firm plans tomorrow and DD2 and I will go whether they come with us or not. Work is super slow since DH is away, so I'm done for the day. It's super hot, so maybe just hanging by the pool or a trip to the beach later today? We have some plans here and there this week, maybe we'll take a ride to the beach house if we're bored.

[campermom]

Next stop is the courthouse for copies of orders, and copies of the financial worksheets that mean nothing bc he didn’t agree to those numbers anyway.

Then find birth certs, SS cards, marriage cert and fill out a 10 page application and pay fees.

[rere]

Great weekend in Charleston. We went to the beach, toured some houses and an aircraft carrier, ate good food and headed out just before the tropical storm rolls in.

On our way to Gatlinburg, TN today. I have big plans of hopefully sitting on a balcony by a creek today, and that's about it. Charleston was about 1000 degrees, so sticking my feet or entire body in fridged mountain water sounds pretty good. And probably an all day conversation about what to eat for dinner between the 5 of us.

[sdlaura]

Ugh campermom , so sorry you're dealing with a mountain of paperwork on enforcement.

mommyatty , I'm thrilled that school starts next week for us! No more pricey camps and the kids get to walk up the street instead of us dropping them off and picking them up all over town, so it's so much easier for me to get to work.

We had a nice summer-y weekend with lots of time in the pool. Yesterday felt soooo long to me for some reason though. I was so ready to put my kids to bed after breaking up a gazillion fights between them.

This is my first day in the office in a really long time, so I'm trying to catch up on stuff. DD gets braces tomorrow, and we have some middle school orientation events this week. Travel softball tryouts also start this week. DD is trying out for a couple clubs and a couple different age groups. So we'll see where she lands.

[twinmomma]

I can't believe we're already in August! We go back to school the week before Labor Day, so it's going to creep up fast on us. The girls are at theater camp for the next two weeks, then they go visit my parents for half the week after that. DS has some soccer camp coming up, as long as his mom doesn't cancel it again to fit her schedule. I have a feeling all that time is going to fly by.

DH and I had a good weekend and I think we're heading into an ok week. We are both feeling the strain of bad eating habits and lack of movement, so we're trying to hold each other more accountable. Yesterday we went for a walk for about a mile and it was great! I'm hoping we can do that more often. It was so good to get out of the house and just chat while getting a little exercise in.

[erbear]

I am really mourning the end of summer. It’s gone so fast! Fortunately, we have some more fun things coming — week at the beach with friends next week, I’m doing a girls weekend at the beach the following week. Kids start preseason in two weeks but I’m annoyed with the time of 3:30-6:30 PM — I work at the school and have to be there 8-3 so I can’t actually get them there at 3:30. I hope someone can give them a ride bc I don’t want them hanging around school 8-3 with nothing to do.

Not much planned this week. I have some work to do and some house stuff but realistically, I’m going to read 5 books instead and finish a painting I’ve been working on for almost a year.

I met with the college counselor today to talk about my kid’s schedule (10th grade). I’m trying to decide whether we should move her out of an honors class because the teacher sucks.

[mustardseed2007]

We are leaving Friday for our last trip for the summer. I definitely feel like we lost time this summer with family tragedies and events. On the upside I hope this is going to be a good school year. We have a really good new principal, some great teacher assignments...here is hoping!

This is a random place for an update but since I haven't posted about this yet (I think I haven't anyway?) - we had the hurricane and then a couple days after my mom suddenly passed away. She was the last grandparent (that I acknowledge, we do still have DH's "all about me" bio mom that I usually try to forget). We had my moms memorial and grave side service last week. So basically yeah, this was a tough summer.

Plus, DH is constantly battling with BIL over his parents' estate b/c BIL is unreasonable and unrealistic. I feel so bad for DH and positively can no longer stand my BIL. I can't get over how crummy I have come to realize DH's family is.

Maybe when the school year starts the structure will be helpful. I hope so anyway.

[waverly]

mustardseed2007, I'm so sorry for the loss of your mom.

[mae0111]

mustardseed2007 - I’m so sorry. That’s a lot. I hope you find some peace and can enjoy your trip with your family.

[186momx]

DD and I went and visited my BFF yesterday. I got 3 glorious hours to visit, and a good 2-hour beach walk too. DD and my BFF kiddos all got along and there were no fighting. Us moms got to walk and talk alone while the kiddos walked/talked/shell hunted behind us. Weather was decent and the drive wasn't horrible other than I had to stop in the middle of Hwy101 because a deer was just chilling in the middle of the road.

We got some good deals at our local home improvement anniversary sale on Saturday and I puttered around the yard afterwards. DH was very annoyed that DD and I were going to visit my friend.

Work wise today I've been very swamped but I will be hit or miss the rest of the week.

[sdlaura]

mustardseed2007 I'm so sorry for your loss.

[campermom]

Oh gosh mustardseed2007 I’m so sorry.

[erbear]

I'm sorry, mustardseed2007

[mommyatty]

mustardseed2007, I’m so sorry to hear that.

[twinmomma]

I'm sorry mustardseed2007

[dglvrk2]

mustardseed2007, I'm so sorry. I hope the remaining days of summer and fall bring you some peace.

campermom, how did the rest of the day go? Sending you good vibes!

[186momx]

mustardseed2007, I'm sorry. I hope the rest of the summer is calmer.

I got 2 different fire evacuation alerts yesterday. One at work for roads near my office building and the other at home for a fire near the reservoir. Both fires were human caused, people lets be careful!

[campermom]

dglvrk2 we went to the dept of social services, the courthouse, home for a virtual appt, back to the courthouse, back to DSS. The entire day/mental load/tasks required with the phone calls and running around was from 8am-4pm.

But I got every document they needed, filled out the app, and social services takes over from here. They will contact his employer-I didn’t have the direct number and she said oh don’t worry we do all the research. I asked what happens if he pays this months child support in the meantime and she said “Oh! You continue to accept”

Once it processes, he will receive a letter and his wages begin garnishment. No signatures or paperwork from him are needed. Other people are taking care of this for him.

I predict this will push him to retire early, so as to attempt to keep me from getting child support, and then he will probably modify in court. If that’s the case, his income will be imputed. Although maybe he won’t retire since he and new wife are already in counseling.

I cannot believe how much I accomplished with this act. I am moving in silence by not asking him, not mentioning it, and not requesting it.

My therapist and I refer to these solutions I do as “checking off the boxes” by removing any control mechanisms he has found.

[mommyatty]

campermom- great thing about the military? They’ll garnish his retirement, and you can argue he’s purposefully underemployed, which then means Rich Wife’s income becomes your new cannon fodder. AND they get to turn over more info to you.

[campermom]

PDQ He retired from the guard in 2022, so it’s just the federal govt full time job now. From everything my lawyer and DSS told me, her income wouldn’t count. If he filed to modify they would definitely subpoena taxes again-and when I finally saw them I was flabbergasted. Jaw on the floor. There is no reason for him to work.

Unfortunately it took several motions to compel and she got a lawyer and filed for a protective order to keep it from us. It was denied and ordered in camera the week before my trial while I was in Cancun, and the judge ordered all of it to be released to me, but they still didn’t submit it until my lawyer called his lawyer on the Sunday before the Monday trial.

[mommyatty]

campermom, the one time (only time) a step-parent’s income can be brought into the equation is when the remarried parent chooses to be underemployed or unemployed because he or she is living off the new spouse. It’s the literal ONLY loophole to that rule.

[campermom]

mommyatty Ohhhhh that is very, very interesting!

This is just so out of the norm. If he’s late it’s usually 1-2 days. I think once was because he wouldn’t get WiFi on his European cruise. ::eye roll:: maybe that was the time it was 4 days late.

But tomorrow is 6 days. It’s just….off.
Something is up. To be continued.

[librarychica]

mustardseed2007, I’m so sorry for you loss. I’ll be thinking of you and your family.