Tell me it's okay to miss work

[Deleted]

I was due eight days ago and am trying to have a home birth. Also, I don't qualify for STD since I got pregnant before I was a permanent employee. I know it sounds silly, but I am so upset about whether or not I should go to work today. I missed Friday because I was so miserable with leg pains. I'm feeling better today, but don't know if I can make it through a day of co-workers' questions and comments.

I'm also scared because my midwife wants me to go in for another ultrasound today just because I'm 41 weeks. Baby is moving around fine and I feel like he's totally okay. I was just in for an ultrasound two weeks ago because midwife was afraid he was massive. That led to a day in the ER because he didn't move at all during the ultrasound. At the ER they couldn't get his heart rate to spike so I was there for hours and ended up with another ultrasound. Three hundred dollars later it turns out my kid it's just really chill. I could have told them that.

I just feel like a total wuss not going to work because I'm not emotionally capable even though I haven't gone into labor. And I'm worried about our budget.

[Deleted]

If you don't want to go, don't go.

However I work up until the day I go into labor (I was 10 days late with DD) because of financial reasons.

[ssmjlm]

It's totally ok to miss work. I would much rather be home and comfortable then be stressed at work and probably uncomfortable.

[lindyanne]

Lots of people take off before their due date bc they're uncomfortable. It might be worth miserable sitting there getting paid if you're going to be miserable and stressed about your budget all day though. Do you really need to be concerned or is that just your nature? The ladies on the regular MM board could help you find some places to temporarily cut back if you need to.

[frlcb]

It's okay to miss work. And don't think of the u/s as 'just because' you are 41 weeks. I went to 42+1 with both my kids because we were able to make sure that fluid levels were okay, and one way of finding that out is through an u/s, so there is a valid reason for going for one at 41 weeks.

[nonsenseabound]

Also, do the ultrasound if you want a home birth. You are making a call to do a birth with less access to immediate emergency care. It would certainly behoove you to take all precautions to keep you and baby safe. Your midwife is prioritizing safety here. Good for her!

I said I was going to stop going to work one day early, I was tired and we had. An induction scheduled for the following day. I then went not labor naturally. Sometimes you just need a day to relax and take a load off to encourage them to come!

[satama]

How far past your due date are you willing to go? I am assuming 41 week? So are you willing to lose 5 more days of pay and just stay home? I would be. If not, then just skipping today might not prevent you from dealing with coworkers and maybe you would rather have the money, Kwim. I would have been home relaxing if I were you, so I definitely think it is ok, but if it means less time at home with the baby, I know it is tough to feel ok missing work.

As far as the ultrasound goes, I am sure you are aware of the possible risks associated with being pregnant this far past due, it is worth spending the money to be sure baby is ok. You cant tell by movement alone if there was a problem. I would have the ultrasound. Two weeks is a long time when you are talking about a pregnancy at the point you are. Especially when you want a homebirth, it is better to have all the info you possibly can.

Good luck. I hope you go into labor soon!

[Deleted]

Okay, I see your point on the ultrasound. I'm scheduled for one at 2:30. Just talked to the midwife and she approved castor oil tomorrow morning if he still isn't here. Trying everything else in the meantime.

[Deleted]

Go for the ultrasound, please! I had non-stress tests every 2 to 3 days after 40 weeks. It's good medical practice. I understand that the costs associated with it can be stressful, but it's much better to do it than not.

Also, does your insurance offer a maternity care program? Mine did and I don't think I even had to pay co-pays for my non-stress tests.

[froggy76]

You're over a week overdue, so you should not feel bad if you can't make it to work anymore. Go in if you need to for financial reasons, but not because you feel like a wuss.

[Deleted]

Just got back from the U/S. He only scored a 6/8. One point off because he didn't move at all (umm, he totally was moving!) and another point because he's not grown much in the past three weeks. He's measuring in at an estimated 8lbs, 6oz though, so it's not like he's too small or anything.

MW is anxious to get him out so I've picked up the castor oil and will be doing shots in the morning. She did say that while I don't have to down it all at once, it does need to go quickly. I informed her that doing shots is what got me into this in the first place, so I think shots are the way to get the final results going.

[Deleted]

Oh, and I feel much better about my horrible attitude this morning wrt dealing with my coworkers. Mom was saying that a good sign I'm about ready to deliver is general apathy and bitchiness. Well, I have that one down today!

[whitepicketfence]

I give you credit for even considering going into work at 41 weeks. I threw in the towel at 38 weeks with DD1 and wish I would have done it sooner. Ha!

Good luck in the coming days! I hope your baby decides to arrive soon!