Vacationing without Kids

[twotrue]

So you all know that I'm a big proponent of traveling with children and showing them the world (or at least life outside their hometown). Jelly Bean has traveled to several different states and of course I took her to England and Portugal with me. But all of that travel was with me.

How do you feel about leaving a child at home(let's pretend he/she is about 2-3 y/o) and going on vacation out of the country?

K and I are thinking (just thinking) about going to our place in Mexico. Don't pipe up with shit about Mexico being dangerous because frankly that isn't my worry at all. I worry about both of JB's parents being out of the country at the same time. But should I worry?

We would leave her at home and have family fly in and watch her so JB would be in her environment and easier to take care of (vs. dropping her off with family in CA).

So would you think twice about being out of country? I really really don't like the feeling of thinking my wings are clipped. Travel is still something I want to be a huge part of my life. And I'm definitely not a parent that has to do everything with my child. I'm totally cool handling her off to someone else now and again. But a week? And a week with me more than a 7 hour plane flight away?

[ct]

Vacationing without the kids isnt really in my realm of reality right now because I have no one who would take them for more than an overnight (and Sprout makes overnights bad enough, I can't even phathom the ramifications of a longer and further away vacation...).

But if I had 1 easy non-trauma issue kid and family I trusted completely to watch her? Sure

But maybe not quite a week, I dont think I'm personally ready for that - 3 nights sounds like a dream though.

[twotrue]

CT - Last night I had dream I was babysitting your kids (I'm pretty sure your kids popped in because JB was looking at your holiday card prior to bed and talking about Sprout and Daisy). We weren't at your house, nor mine. We were outside in some sort of play yard. Anyway, I look over my shoulder to see Daisy standing up and trying to "pee like Sprout." lol! In my dream I took a photo and sent it to you via text with some message like "See, your kids are fine. They're even learning new things."

And that was all I remember. Want to analyze that one? ;-)

[ct]

So when should i drop them off?

hehe

[ct]

and that's especially funny b/c RB *has* started talking about "when I"m big I"m going to pee standing up like my brudder."

[kershnic]

If you completely trust the family member who would be staying with her, you think she'll handle being away from you for a week OK, and it sounds fun to you then why not go for it? Obviously you will want to have in place a signed/notarized document authorizing your family member to allow medical care. I don't see any reason parents have to stop doing this stuff just because they're parents. I highly doubt we'll ever be in the position where this is feasible, but since it sounds like you are then enjoy.

[twotrue]

Oct 16, 2012 13:28:00 GMT -5 ct said:

and that's especially funny b/c RB *has* started talking about "when I"m big I"m going to pee standing up like my brudder."

lol! I was probably combining your holiday photo with my daughter's recent habit of peeing on the floor.

Okay, so I can't really call it a habit but the other day the dog had an accident in the house, which JB witnessed. Later that night she pulls down her pants and pees on the floor - "I pee on floor like Max."

[2brides]

Oct 16, 2012 13:30:18 GMT -5 kershnic said:

If you completely trust the family member who would be staying with her, you think she'll handle being away from you for a week OK, and it sounds fun to you then why not go for it? Obviously you will want to have in place a signed/notarized document authorizing your family member to allow medical care. I don't see any reason parents have to stop doing this stuff just because they're parents. I highly doubt we'll ever be in the position where this is feasible, but since it sounds like you are then enjoy.

ditto. All of it.

[twotrue]

Oct 16, 2012 13:55:13 GMT -5 2brides said:

Oct 16, 2012 13:30:18 GMT -5 kershnic said:

If you completely trust the family member who would be staying with her, you think she'll handle being away from you for a week OK, and it sounds fun to you then why not go for it? Obviously you will want to have in place a signed/notarized document authorizing your family member to allow medical care. I don't see any reason parents have to stop doing this stuff just because they're parents. I highly doubt we'll ever be in the position where this is feasible, but since it sounds like you are then enjoy.

ditto. All of it.

Thanks. I agree. I would only leave her with someone I was totally comfortable with and of course we'd get all the legal paperwork lined up as necessary.

It might be a moot point anyway as I just called my parents to see if they could fly in and apparently my dad is having surgery next week. Nothing like hiding shit from your kids. ::sigh::

But I won't put the idea completely away. If we can rework the timing then perhaps we'll ditch the little sucker and leave country.

[kershnic]

Aw, sorry about your dad! My parents do that stuff to me all the time. Like....dad: 'remember, like when i had skin cancer?' Me: 'uh, no?' Him: 'oh, did I not tell you about that?'

I hope you can find better timing and go for it. Do it for all of the moms (and people spending all their time/money on infertility) on this board who can't.

[twotrue]

Oct 16, 2012 15:11:37 GMT -5 kershnic said:

Aw, sorry about your dad! My parents do that stuff to me all the time. Like....dad: 'remember, like when i had skin cancer?' Me: 'uh, no?' Him: 'oh, did I not tell you about that?'

That's exactly what my parents do. Last Christmas, while at home, I noticed a blood pressure cuff in the spare room/office. When I asked my mom about it, she said "Oh, I didn't want to ruin the holidays but I'm having spinal surgery the week after Christmas." :-| Had she told me in advance I could have taken more time off, tried to help my dad, etc., but nope.

[never2amazing]

First you have to promise you will still love me after you read my response...if not...then don't read

"So would you think twice about being out of country?" Hell ya, I would think twice...for the reason you stated: "I really really don't like the feeling of thinking my wings are clipped."

and

"...with me more than a 7 hour plane flight away?"

R u kidding me...7 hours, that is too f-ing long my dear...especially with cancelled flights and all the shit that can occur when traveling by air (e.g. overbooked flights). I have learned that airlines don't pay much attention to "I have to get home because..." like they used to do.

Trips apart are fine...but definitely not 7-hours of flying time. So let it be written, so let it be done!

(Okay, that was my huah voice that I never use. It would be hard for me to take such a trip.)

[cymru]

At this age I wouldn't do it for a whole week. I don't think I could even be a several hour car ride from her for a whole week.


In a couple more years I would probably be more okay with it.

[joyseattle]

Without kids yet, this is all theoretical, but here goes. First, I don't think I'd leave my 2-3 year old for more than an night or two and only if I were within about an hour or two drive. That's just me though.

C and I have talked about travel post-kids as I have generally taken a solo 3-10 day trip each year since we've been together. She doesn't like the idea of me leaving her with kids to travel on my own. It's a topic of contention that I'm not sure we'll be able to agree on until we have kids and a specific travel opportunity. We do plan to travel with kids as much as possible though.

Another aspect is that we don't have many people we'd feel completely comfortable leaving our kids with for extended periods of time. But I agree that the distance/time of getting home in the case of an emergency would make me uncomfortable with a less than 7-ish year old.

Best of luck on you decision and if you travel, I hope you have a fabulous time!

[rikkiandjulie]

Absolutely. I think it's important to have time away from the children. It'd be someone I trusted 100% but yes!

[thiswillbe]

I probably wouldn't go for that long at this age. Obviously kids' comprehension is taking off at this point, so they might be fully able to understand it at 2/3, but I'd want to wait until I was sure the kid(s) really 100% understood that we were coming back, could count down the days until our return, etc. Just watching the kids through this most recent trip of S's, it was clear to me that even though they are super verbal and their comprehension is fantastic, they still don't totally wrap their heads around what travel means (of course, that could totally be because neither of us travel all that much).

I don't think your wings are clipped/your travel days are over. Worst-case, it's just a brief pause (in the grand scheme of things). How about doing a short/closer trip this year and planning an awesome sans-JB trip for next year? Would that make you feel better?

[ElsaVonM]

I would trust my parents to take great care of the kids, and to make good decisions in my stead in an emergency. I wouldn't want both of us to be on the other side of the world (Australia or Japan or something), but I think Mexico would be fine. There is always the chance that something crazy could happen and you'd get stuck there, but the same is true for going to Florida or anywhere, really.