OCS questions, please help!

[coffeeandbooks]

As warned, I have a few questions about OCS. I know a lot of things I am just going to have to wait and find out, but I'm hoping you guys might be able to give me some thoughts, experiences, etc.

First, getting to OCS. Rhode Island is a long, but manageable drive away from where we live, roughly 7 hours. I asked H if I could drive him up there and he thought that would work. However, I have been trying to do some research online and I have read some suggestions that if possible, you drive your own car to OCS. The only reason I could find was because you can keep stuff in there that you are not allowed to have during the first few weeks of training. Is this valid? Would it be beneficial for him to have his own car while there? Any other reason why it would not be a good thing for me to drop him off? There must be people who have to fly in, what do they do?

Second question/ whine is that my H will be in training for Christmas
I'm wondering what you all think the odds are that he'll be able to have the day off or have visitors for Christmas. His recruiter said it "could" happen. I know this one is a wait and see. Just wondering if anyone has any experience in a similar situation.

Actually that kind of ties back into the first dilemma, because I'm honestly not sure if my car can make a six hour drive back and forth, and if H has his car there already....

Finally I'm just looking for suggestions. We decided to celebrate Christmas early, just to ensure we get to celebrate together, set up our tree and decorations and everything. But now that we decided to do this I have no idea what to get H for a Christmas gift! I would normally probably get him video games or something, but should I get him games he won't be able to play for awhile? Hmmmm I don't want to get him new running sneakers or plain white t-shirts or anything. I dunno.

[piper84]

I'm not much help about OCS but I can tell you about our experience with OTS (Air Force) thus far (H is there now). My H flew because driving from CA to AL would take for-eva! So I'm not much help there. But he said several people do have cars there which is nice because about 6 weeks into the training, they were given off-base privileges on the weekends. Again, I'm not sure if the same holds true for OCS. Also, at OTS he has very, very limited space for personal items - only one small drawer. Up until now, they weren't allowed food or drink in their rooms, either. Do if your H wanted special snacks or something for later on, he could keep that in his car. Towards the end of OTS, H said they would be allowed to wear civilian clothes on the weekends - of course he didn't bring any, but this could be another thing people keep in their cars.

I'm sorry to hear about Christmas! That is like us for Thanksgiving this year - H will still be at OTS. It's my favorite holiday and we have all these traditions, so I'm a little bummed. Do you know which week of OCS Christmas falls in? I assume it would be way more likely for your H to be allowed visitors later on in his training (perhaps not if it's one of the first few weeks). My H will have off-base privileges for Thanksgiving so technically I could go visit and we could stay in a hotel (but I'm going Veterans Day weekend instead... it's sooner!). Your H will definitely have the day "off" -- I believe they are given all government holidays. So if it's really important to you, I bet you'd be able to spend time with him that day. I think it's just something you have to be flexible about and realize being off-base is a privilege and can be revoked at any time (hopefully not on Christmas though!).

I'm not sure if this info helps at all! Hope you get some other info from people who've gone through OCS

[piper84]

Oh, and one more thing... this is about driving your H to OCS. The situation may be completely different for you, but I don't think it would've been a good idea for me, had I been in your shoes (and had the option of driving H). i thought I was going to be strong and tough and not cry, but about 30 minutes after I said goodbye, I fell apart. I immediately wanted to be surrounded by friends or family or someone so that I wasn't alone. I think it might be a loooooong, sad car ride home for you -- again, I'm not sure what your personality is like and how you react to these situations. This was the first time in 9 years that H and I had been apart for more than maybe 3 days at a time, so it was really hard.

Also, you may think that you want to spend as much time with H as possible, but trust me - those last days and hours are pretty miserable. By the time he left, I was actually relieved. The anticipation of him leaving was horrible.

Additionally, it might be helpful for you H to say goodbye (and be sad, emotional, whatever) and then have a few hours to cool down and focus before showing up at OCS. I know my husband used the plane flight to get his "game face" on. Haha. Perhaps your H could find someone else in your area and carpool down? My H took a flight with 9 others from CA and he really enjoyed bonding a little bit with them before the HELL started!

[amaristella]

DH did not take his car to OCS because we had been living in California before he joined. He was lucky enough, though, to make friends with someone in his class who did bring his car. I would say about 1/3 to 1/2 of his classmates had a car. See, the thing is that officially they are allowed time every so often to go out to their vehicles and check on them. Warm them up, make sure that they haven't been vandalized, etc.

As a bonus, because the cars are not subject to the same restrictions as their rooms they can do things like keep junk food in their trunk and have cell phones! I got a couple extra phone calls from DH that way. And of course, every single phone call is a bonus during OCS.

Will he have liberty on Christmas day? Nobody can promise you either way. It probably depends on where he is in the program but if I had to swing one way or the other I'd say yes. Sometimes they are given weekend liberty towards the end of the training if the drill sergeant feels they've earned it. And I distinctly remember DH being given weekend liberty for some other Federal holiday, so it's certainly not impossible.

Don't worry about getting him t-shirts for Christmas, they can purchase almost anything they really need while they're there. I would advise him to show up with a new (but broken in) good quality pair of runners, though. Especially if he needs any special insoles to prevent injuries. Really, just ask him what he thinks he would want for Christmas. Whatever it is I'm sure he will enjoy it once he finishes the program.

There used to be a really good 6 part documentary on OCS that Providence Journal did in 2008 but for some reason the link is no longer working. I know that there's a similar video for marine OCS which is a little bit similar. I'll see if I can find that for you.

[amaristella]

This video isn't too too bad. It's old but a lot of what it covers hasn't changed in a long time. You can also just google videos for Navy OCS. You'll find a bunch of hi-moms videos and stuff.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=_v_netqzAmk

[coffeeandbooks]

Thanks for the advice. Sounds like it would probably be helpful for him to have his own car, and you're right, I wouldn't want to have an emotional good bye right before he checks in.

[piper84]

Oct 20, 2012 11:37:54 GMT -5 coffeeandbooks said:

Thanks for the advice. Sounds like it would probably be helpful for him to have his own car, and you're right, I wouldn't want to have an emotional good bye right before he checks in.

When does your H start OCS? Soon? Will this be the first time you guys have been apart for a significant period of time?

[coffeeandbooks]

He starts Dec. 2nd. And yeah, it will be our first significant amount of time apart since we were married. Really the first time apart for that long since we started dating!

[piper84]

Oct 22, 2012 18:30:09 GMT -5 coffeeandbooks said:

He starts Dec. 2nd. And yeah, it will be our first significant amount of time apart since we were married. Really the first time apart for that long since we started dating!

Awww I know the feeling. That was definitely our experience too. Only 7 more weeks for us. Hang in there! I'm here if you ever need to chat!