@ I'm irrationally pissed. Hand Foot Mouth disease

[Deleted]

I'll try to be brief. (oh, who am I kidding)

We are scheduled to fly to see my sister and her family in 10 days. We are close. It's been 8 months since we've seen each other, the longest by far I've gone without seeing my sis or nieces & nephew.

We waited so long because one of my dogs was diagnosed with cancer in Oct., given 6-8 weeks to live, and he outlasted that by a long shot (7 months). I didn't want to book a trip until he passed, didn't want to him to be without us if things took sudden turn. But pup was rocking and 6 months in, we booked our trip and crossed our fingers.

Pup suddenly went downhill fast, and we cancelled trip. He died the day we were supposed to leave. It was a bummer (beyond, obviously, being very upset over losing our dog) because we were supposed to join them in a fundraising walk for my niece and because my mom would be there visiting and she rarely gets to see all the kids at once, it's a rare treat.

I scrambled to reschedule after we were ready, supposed to leave next week. At a considerably higher cost. The airfare is $500 higher, and the hotel rates are higher as well, because we're into peak season. It's a splurge, but we're doing it. And we were supposed to hit Disney World one day while we're there, a first my kids have been talking about nonstop.

So, a friend sort of invited herself, husband and 1 year old to our house for a BBQ 3 days ago, Saturday.

They came by Sunday morning because she forgot her purse. Daughter had red blisters all over her mouth. Friend says, very casually, "darn, didn't know we could get hand foot and mouth twice. Poor thing. Should've seen it coming, her appetite has been off again for days. Have your boys had that?"

No. I didn't think to ask any questions, because I'm non-confrontational to a fault, so I don't know how long ago she first had it or how long she'd been symptom free. My reading tells me it's possible, but unlikely, to really get it twice. Probably she just still had it. And even after symptoms stop, you're still contagious for a couple of weeks.

My husband is pissed at my friend, and, I think, at me. Like most 1 year olds, little girl slobbered on many of our toys, and she and my youngest shared yogurt melts back and forth. I'm really not a germphobe, I let my kids eat their stray goldfish off the floor.

BUT...this is shit we don't need. The only acceptable thing to do if the kids get it is cancel because they will still be contagious in 10 days and my youngest niece has type 1 diabetes and it can be a lot more dangerous for her to get viruses. It can really complicate her diabetes care and she sometimes winds up in the hospital from run-of-the-mill illnesses.

My youngest now has a fever and a strange diaper rash. I don't know yet if it's the start of HFM. But I'm so irrationally fucking PISSED. I know it's no one's fault, but I really, really, really wanted this trip to work out. And I don't look forward to painful lesions in my kids' mouths, either.

But, boo fucking hiss. I had to vent here, because normally this is the sort of thing I'd vent to about my sister and I'm not ready to freak her out just yet. Damn.

[basilosaurus]

OMG, vent away. I've be pissed, too, at your friend. Her child was contagious and she brought her to your house? What a terrible friend.

[pixy0stix]

I'd be really really pissed in your situation. Who brings their contagious kid to a party?

[meshaliuknits]

Your first line made me totally lol. But, man, that does suck.

BabyLiu had HFM (correctly diagnosed by PCE before the pedi, I might add) and the pedi said she was OK to go back to daycare once the spots around her mouth were gone, nothing about the butt spots. Daycare agreed. Maybe your friend got similar info and thought she was in the clear?

[EloiseWeenie]

Your friend sucks.

[Deleted]

May 21, 2012 16:53:03 GMT -5 meshaliuknits said:

Maybe your friend got similar info and thought she was in the clear?

I *so* hope this is the case. I think I'd be downright livid if someone knowingly brought their sick kid around my kid. Grr!

Hope it turns out okay!

[brit1017]

DS and DD had HFM last year. They did get a very weird rash on their trunk at the start of the symptoms.

It sucks, but your friend probably didn't realize that she had it/ was contagious. If I remember correctly, they are contagious before they start showing symptoms. My kids got it from the babysitter's kids- it was all over their preschool.

[curmudgeon]

I would be pissed if kid still had symptoms, but I didn't realize it was contagious after the blisters went away. DD just had it, but daycare said she could come back after the blisters were gone (she was out for a week). I'd check with a doctor and definitely check in with your sister on what she thinks.

[downtoearth]

It's actually not too bad to have hand-foot-mouth when traveling - in my experience. ETA: I didn't get it, so I don't know how miserable it is, but my 5 and 3 year olds were still able to ski, play, run around, and eat (with the help of baby orajel).

Make sure you buy some baby oragel (even for older kids), kids ibuprofen/tylenol, and some small bottles of hand santizer to travel with and so if you do get it, you can avoid infecting others and help your kids get over it.

My kids came down with it as we were driving to a weekend getaway and despite having to keep them a little seperate from the other kids - especially during meals, we managed to get through the trip without infecting anyone else or my kids being miserable. We couldn't not go on the trip (since we had already arrived when I realized the problem) and our nurse/doc we consulted with said that there really isn't much to do. I did freely hand out sanitizer to all the other kids and families on the trip just to be safe.

[Deleted]

Thank you for letting me vent and not thinking I'm an OCD heifer. I talked to the dr and feel slightly better. He said technically you can shed it in stool for weeks after, but with good handwashing there is very little risk. He said he clears kids to go back to school from HFM after they've been fever free for a day.

I agree, I'd like to give friend benefit of the doubt that she really thought they were no longer contagious.

Whew. I'll have one of these :drink: (ok, a second one of these) and try not to obsess. Thanks, ladies.

[earlgreyhot]

HFM made its rounds in my 'hood but totally skipped us, despite swapping drool with infected friends. You could be fine. Also, I feel like it moved fast.

I'd still be pissed in your shoes.

[Deleted]

Wait...I meant it's been well over a year since I've seen them. That sounded awfully whiny for 8 months. Regardless, I really hope we don't have to cancel again.

[dutchgirl678]

Your friend sucks! If she knew her kid had it she should not have come over. DS got it last week as well. There were kids in daycare that had it head-to-toe. He luckily had a mild case. He had fever on Sunday and a mild diaper rash. On Monday I saw some spots near his mouth and on his leg so I took him to the dr who said the same thing, that he could go back to daycare 24 hrs after fever was gone. I kept him home Monday and Tuesday and he felt fine, just had some red spots. It didn't seem to bother him and now the spots are starting to fade. They never really blistered or oozed thank goodness.

But I did what I could to keep him from infecting other kids. One mom took her kid to daycare while she was covered head-to-toe in scabs and said she had a heat rash. Another mom at my daughter's preschool asked the teacher to rub lotion all over her son's body 3x a day. I think not!

[curmudgeon]

So this is a bit of a tangent, but when DD had HFM a few weeks ago the doctor said it was strep, didn't test for it though, put her on antibiotics and the rash became much, much worse. I guess the PSA here is make sure kiddo has something bacterial before consenting to antibiotics.

[Deleted]

DS2 had HFM. It started with a rash on his groin. The doc actually noticed it and didn't say anything, then that night he was a PITA. I took him to school the next day so I could take a nap (I was PG and didn't realize he was sick). I dropped him at his classroom first and then dropped DS1 at his classroom as I was coming out they stopped me and said DS2 had HFM. He was miserable for a few days but then fine.

If your DS has symptoms now he should be in the clear by the time you go on vacation.

[ering1115]

ds had a very mild case maybe a month or 2 ago. Daycare cleared them to go back as soon as they were fever free.

We had a similar situation..... I found out the day before we were flying cross country that one of the infants in his class room had chicken pox. of course it was after 5p so our normal pediatrician wasn't answering phones. I called my cousin, asked if she cared if her kids were exposed, she said no, we traveled and he never got it.

Please don't let this ruin your trip. I am sure you can take it even if you have to do some strict quarantine measures to make sure your niece isn't exposed. good luck!

Tangent- hate the name hand foot mouth. It makes me think of a livestock disease. And my goodness are daycares disease traps.

[somersault72]

Yeah, you're not being irrational. HF&M is the devil's disease and it spreads like wildfire. I'd be pissed, planned trip or not.

P.S. Sorry to hear about your pup.

[crazytalk]

Ugh, good luck. My 1-year old just got over coxsackie aka HFM, and it was a nightmare. Fever for 6 straight days (between 100.8 and 102), sores in his mouth so bad he couldn't eat anything (so he just drank), bleeding from the mouth sores, cranky as all hell. It was bad.

I think often it's much more mild than that, so hopefully if you get it at all it's not so bad.

[Deleted]

Crazytalk, Oh goodness, that sounds awful. So glad you are through that mess now. We had a hellish night last night, he cried for over 3 hours, despite me trying everything (nursing, rocking, bringing him to our bed) so I really hope it's just teething and not some terrible pain in his mouth.

[Deleted]

May 22, 2012 9:43:08 GMT -5 @vanessadoof said:

Crazytalk, Oh goodness, that sounds awful. So glad you are through that mess now. We had a hellish night last night, he cried for over 3 hours, despite me trying everything (nursing, rocking, bringing him to our bed) so I really hope it's just teething and not some terrible pain in his mouth.

I don't know how old your son is, but there are mouth wash mixes you can make to ease the pain. It is something like gargling with pepto and something else.

[crazytalk]

Yes, the doc recommended that.... at his age (1 yr), gargling wasn't an option, so we just let him drink it. 1/2 teaspoon benadryl mixed with 1/2 teaspoon maalox. It didn't seem to do much good. We got the doc appt towards the end of the illness, but when we tried it he didn't eat much more than before we tried it.

Apparently if they can gargle, there's an extra ingredient in the mix. I'm not sure what it is though.

[Deleted]

May 22, 2012 10:16:44 GMT -5 crazytalk said:

Yes, the doc recommended that.... at his age (1 yr), gargling wasn't an option, so we just let him drink it. 1/2 teaspoon benadryl mixed with 1/2 teaspoon maalox. It didn't seem to do much good. We got the doc appt towards the end of the illness, but when we tried it he didn't eat much more than before we tried it.

Apparently if they can gargle, there's an extra ingredient in the mix. I'm not sure what it is though.

I didn't ask, but it is probably a good idea too...but I gave my DS some tums too. I use tums when I have canker sores and they provide relief too.

[Deleted]

Thanks for the tips. He has it. Not a happy camper. He's 22 months. I tried baby orajel and I'll look into Tums for his age. Poor miserable kid.