Please tell me it will be okay.

[bullygirl979]

Sorry, I know I am being a drama llama but I really need some encouragement. If you didn't read FFFC. I am going to break up with my BF.

Don't feel like airing all my dirty laundry but my gut is telling me that it isn't right and that I deserve better. We obviously are on different pages in regards to our morals and values.

Anyway....I am sitting here feeling pretty fucking disheartened and sad. Someone please pat me on the head and tell me that it will be okay....

[hoolygo]

It will hurt and you will feel bad for a while, and you may second guess your decision sometimes, but the fact that you're on this board means you've survived worse and you will be okay.

[blackkitty]

It'll suck for a while but you'll get over it. It's okay to be sad, breaking up is hard to do yo

[dakotadangerdog]

Rip off the bandaid! Once you get it over with you will feel sweet relief.

*pat pat* you will get through this! And we will be here the whole way.

[Deleted]

Remember that once you do it, it will suck for a while, but from there it's only going to get better. Life is too short to be in relationships that aren't right for you. Be proud of yourself for recognizing this now and doing what's right for you and your BF.

[callunafirefly]

Do you think he sees this coming at all? If you really feel this is the best thing - its probably better to do it sooner rather than waiting until he finishes the chores. Can you get away for the weekend (since you live together)?

[bullygirl979]

May 11, 2012 13:10:07 GMT -5 callunafirefly said:

Do you think he sees this coming at all? If you really feel this is the best thing - its probably better to do it sooner rather than waiting until he finishes the chores. Can you get away for the weekend (since you live together)?

He is OOT all next week and I need a few days to get my head straight. I don't think he will be surprised when it does happen.

[missbetty1]

It will be okay...don't be like me and wait 6 years to finally decide to do it. My gut told me something wasn't right after the first few months of knowing him but did I listen noooooooo and the next thing I know is freakin 6 years later!Believe me the longer you take the worse it gets...

[starryfish]

I was in your shoes about 3.5 months ago. It took me a while, but I finally did it. I felt 110% better after doing it bc I wasnt living a lie anymore.

Its going to suck, but YOU need to do whats right for YOU!

Hugs!

[Lauren88]

It is going to suck at first which is completely normal, but please give yourself a lot of credit for going with your gut here and ending it sooner rather then later. You know you'll be fine after you end it but emotionally it will be hard for a few weeks.
We're here for you if you want support obviously!

[BlueBayou]

Life is too short to waste time on anyone that you don't want in your life. If you have decided this is what you want do it so you can heal and move on and find the RIGHT one. You will be okay and you WILL get through this. Control your life sweetie and do the things you have always wanted to and get your spirit back .

[doriswe]

You deserve better....you deserve better.....you deserve better!!

[clea]

It sounds like a good decision for you, but a tough issue face-to-face. It will be hard now but harder later. I'm willing to bet you will have no regrets. Your heart knows what is best.

[starburst604]

I was in your shoes 2 boyfriends ago. I knew from the start we didn't have enough in common and weren't compatible but he was a nice guy and I tried to make a square peg fit into a round hole. Around 9 months we were starting to talk about living together and due to our lack of compatibility it started a lot of fighting. That's when I finally got up the courage to say I couldn't do it anymore. At first I felt terrible, felt bad about hurting him, sad that I was single again and had to put my tail between my legs and go back into the dating pool. But after a few weeks, honestly I was relieved. It's not easy but you WILL feel better once you do it. Now I SMH that we were ever together.

[bullygirl979]

May 11, 2012 13:46:20 GMT -5 starburst604 said:

I was in your shoes 2 boyfriends ago. I knew from the start we didn't have enough in common and weren't compatible but he was a nice guy and I tried to make a square peg fit into a round hole. Around 9 months we were starting to talk about living together and due to our lack of compatibility it started a lot of fighting. That's when I finally got up the courage to say I couldn't do it anymore. At first I felt terrible, felt bad about hurting him, sad that I was single again and had to put my tail between my legs and go back into the dating pool. But after a few weeks, honestly I was relieved. It's not easy but you WILL feel better once you do it. Now I SMH that we were ever together.

What I struggle with is that we DO have so much in common and we are so compatible. We both love the same things and essentially want the same things. But there is one GLARING thing that I can't ignore. I almost wish I could...

[missbetty1]

May 11, 2012 13:46:20 GMT -5 starburst604 said:

I was in your shoes 2 boyfriends ago. I knew from the start we didn't have enough in common and weren't compatible but he was a nice guy and I tried to make a square peg fit into a round hole. Around 9 months we were starting to talk about living together and due to our lack of compatibility it started a lot of fighting. That's when I finally got up the courage to say I couldn't do it anymore. At first I felt terrible, felt bad about hurting him, sad that I was single again and had to put my tail between my legs and go back into the dating pool. But after a few weeks, honestly I was relieved. It's not easy but you WILL feel better once you do it. Now I SMH that we were ever together.

I use to say the exact same thing (bolded) ALL the time when I tried to explain to my friends how I was feeling! I love this forum You guys make me feel SO much better

[riverpestie]

Sending you tons and tons of good thoughts!

You know you're always welcome to come visit me and Starry! We're here for you!!

[starburst604]

May 11, 2012 13:50:09 GMT -5 bullygirl979 said:

May 11, 2012 13:46:20 GMT -5 starburst604 said:

I was in your shoes 2 boyfriends ago. I knew from the start we didn't have enough in common and weren't compatible but he was a nice guy and I tried to make a square peg fit into a round hole. Around 9 months we were starting to talk about living together and due to our lack of compatibility it started a lot of fighting. That's when I finally got up the courage to say I couldn't do it anymore. At first I felt terrible, felt bad about hurting him, sad that I was single again and had to put my tail between my legs and go back into the dating pool. But after a few weeks, honestly I was relieved. It's not easy but you WILL feel better once you do it. Now I SMH that we were ever together.

What I struggle with is that we DO have so much in common and we are so compatible. We both love the same things and essentially want the same things. But there is one GLARING thing that I can't ignore. I almost wish I could...

If that thing is really important to you, you aren't going to be able to ignore it. With us that "big thing" was sex. There was no way it was ever going to work. To be frank, I don't know WHO he will find that will be able to deal with him but I guess there's a lid for every pot.

[charitylynne79]

I agree with all of the above. If I think I know it's the right story - if you know in your gut that it's over, then go with your gut on this one. It'll be so much better for you.

[turtle1120]

Of course you'll be ok. As someone else said, the fact that you're already here means that you've been through much worse. Don't prolong the misery. Just rip the band-aid off and do it.

Sorry you're going through this though. It sucks. Hugs to you.

[doriswe]

May 11, 2012 13:50:09 GMT -5 bullygirl979 said:

May 11, 2012 13:46:20 GMT -5 starburst604 said:

I was in your shoes 2 boyfriends ago. I knew from the start we didn't have enough in common and weren't compatible but he was a nice guy and I tried to make a square peg fit into a round hole. Around 9 months we were starting to talk about living together and due to our lack of compatibility it started a lot of fighting. That's when I finally got up the courage to say I couldn't do it anymore. At first I felt terrible, felt bad about hurting him, sad that I was single again and had to put my tail between my legs and go back into the dating pool. But after a few weeks, honestly I was relieved. It's not easy but you WILL feel better once you do it. Now I SMH that we were ever together.

What I struggle with is that we DO have so much in common and we are so compatible. We both love the same things and essentially want the same things. But there is one GLARING thing that I can't ignore. I almost wish I could...

I must have been busy working or some stupid thing and I missed this....burying your head in the sand doesn't make the problem go away. Issues continue to exist, even if you try to ignore them or minimize them!! It sucks to do the right thing, and you will always know what the right thing to do is....now or down the road, kwim??

[bullygirl979]

Thanks, ladies. Seriously. Very, very wise women on here.

[explorer2001]

You are doing the right thing. Hugs. Just take care of yourself during this time.

[udscoobychick]

**hugs** Hope you're feeling a bit better today! You're doing the right thing, and everything happens for a reason!

[vikingqueen]

((hugs)) if you feel in your gut that this is the right thing then do it. I know it's hard and it sucks, but I have found that I have to trust my gut instinct.. Been burned in the past too many times by not doing so. Hope your feeling better today and a little more at peace with your decision.

[offbeatmama]

It's going to suck (breaking up always does) but if you're having these feelings now then you know what you need to do. All we can do is offer support, hugs if you need them, and an open ear to listen. Good luck and stay strong! It will be okay. It gets better with time.

[Deleted]

Always follow your gut!

[hazelandblue]

Sometimes we just get so comfortable in the situation we are in it's tough to make a change even though we know in our hearts it is for the best. You obviously know he is not who you need to be with. Now is the time to do It rather than later. Pain is a doorway to peace of mind. You will be fine! Best of luck to you. Just remember you have a board full of complete strangers who are here for you