Oh, tamb, I am so sorry. How difficult this must be for your whole family, and I know things like this are even harder this time of year. I hope things take a turn for the better, or else your mom comes around to the idea of hospice. Hugs.
Lurker from MM...but it seems like we are going through some of the same things. My dad has stage 4 lung cancer, w/ a timeline of ~30wks. Original dx in 2009, got the treatments, was clear, and then it came back earlier this year. We found out that it was in his brain, collarbone and neck. Just last week we got word that he has a blood clot in his leg that has traveled all the way to his lungs. He also has the pleural effusion. It sucks bad.
I'm sorry you have to go through this. Feel free to pm me if you want some "misery loves company" venting or anything else.