A doctor I normally love, gave me a ton of attitude when I asked her to slow down while doing a cervical check. Her glove wasn't lubricated much, and she was moving at lightening speed.
She literally rammed her hand in there so fast I tensed up and jumped, causing her to have to practically dig deep to feel my cervix. That's when I asked her to slow down so I could relax (knowing she could get a lot deeper) and she looked so annoyed at me.
I had a similar experience last night with another doctor.
WTF can't they slide their fingers in slower so you can relax? I'm all fired up now. It seemed so inconsiderate.
I know having someon else check you is always going to be uncomfortable - but when I did checks myself while TTC it was a breeze because I went SLOW and felt my way there, vs. jamming my fingers straight in.
I found that the hospital brought out the best and worst in docs. The good ones realized that you were freaking your shit out and needed a little hand holding. The not so good ones didn't (I'll never forget our convo with the first peri, it was so so horrible). I'm sorry When do you get your results back from the FFN? How was your cervix today?
Not dilated, is still short but did not get an ultrasound measurement today. It's not thin, so that's good.
Results should be back in 45 mins to an hour.
If results are negative, I get sent home on Procardia, see peri tomorrow (maybe) then again Wednesday for an ultrasound measurement. No work until they confirm cervix isn't shortening.
If results are positive I get 1st steriod shot, then 2nd one tomorrow, and 48 hrs after first shot I am allowed to go home for bed rest. They will release me, but not until the steriod shots have done their job.
Why in the world aren't they giving you the shots before the results? That makes no sense. Unless there is some side effect with your heart that I don't know about. Thinking good thoughts!!
You are right to be annoyed. I'd start preemptively telling the docs to take it easy down there, as every time they manhandle you, you get tenser for the next encounter.
Post by Ashley&Scott on Jan 4, 2013 15:30:35 GMT -5
I'm sorry CB. Cervical checks suck, even more so when you're contracting. I think some of them just try to be as quick as possible because it's often hurts no matter what.
What's the latest update? Other than this OB issue how are you doing/feeling?
Just find a way to make a comment before the next check. I have hard to stick veins, and I find that if I say something like "oh, they're a bit tricky!" before a poke, the tech tries harder and gets it in one. I see this as kind of the same... if you can say "I'm a bit rusty, so take a second on the way in", it's a bit of a joke but also a reminder to slow the hell down.
But at the same time, I don't think comparing her job to foreplay is totally fair.
She's a woman so she should absolutely know that there would be less discomfort if she gave me the opportunity to relax and went slow. I don't think I'm being unfair with that expectation in the least. She knows how the female body works, and knows my body was not ready for a dry glove. (Pea sized bit of lube on tip of finger, that's it.)
The doctor that everyone loved, and one that I really liked when I met him in the office, ended up delivering DS and he was the biggest dick. If I could have felt my legs, I would have kicked him in the head (told me I was pushing wrong, would heavy sigh and roll his eyes if I missed the chance to push during a contraction). Sorry you had that experience...it sounds terrible!
Ugh she should know that internals are painful as it is, she doesn't need to get like that. Good for you for saying something. I'm really bad at sticking up for myself.
She's a woman so she should absolutely know that there would be less discomfort if she gave me the opportunity to relax and went slow. I don't think I'm being unfair with that expectation in the least. She knows how the female body works, and knows my body was not ready for a dry glove. (Pea sized bit of lube on tip of finger, that's it.)
Yeah, but "20 minutes into foreplay"? This is her job, she should slow down, but not take 20 minutes to do something routine. The expectation to slow down is fair and i agreed with you in that, the comparison to foreplay is what I think goes a bit far.
I'm not expecting her to take 20 minutes. I'm making a point that she should know that a body isn't ready to accept a practical fist without being relaxed. Of course it's not a fun exam, and of course my body isn't in the mode of wanting to accept anything coming in, which is why she should have gone slow without even being told. And lubed the hell out of her fingers in advance.
The doctor that everyone loved, and one that I really liked when I met him in the office, ended up delivering DS and he was the biggest dick. If I could have felt my legs, I would have kicked him in the head (told me I was pushing wrong, would heavy sigh and roll his eyes if I missed the chance to push during a contraction). Sorry you had that experience...it sounds terrible!
The OB I least liked during my pregnancy was the OB that delivered M. To my surprise she was absolutely awesome during labor. Never in a million years would I have guessed that from my checkups with her. They really can be different in L&D.
Post by curbsideprophet on Jan 4, 2013 16:05:54 GMT -5
I am sorry you had a bad experience with a doctor you previously liked. Hopefully things go better next time. I hope you get good news from the test results.
FWIW, no matter what the test says I would not go home at all unless I got the steroid shots. Not in a million years.
I hope you get good news soon.
I totally agree with this. I'd also find out about going on some type of modified bedrest, given these complications, and/or working from home, unless your cervix miraculously goes back up to over 3. Bedrest sucks, but I'd rather take it easy now than regret it later.
Good luck! I've been thinking of you all day and checking for updates. I remember how nerve-wracking those overnight stays in the hospital are.
Post by barefootcontessa on Jan 4, 2013 16:31:18 GMT -5
I know every situation is different and not all facts/details are known, but based on what I have experienced everything could actually be fine. It seems like what you need to know is whether your cervix is shortening. I have been having contrax now since before viability (I am 31-32 weeks) but they have done nothing to my cervix. No dilating, no effacement. It seems that this may be a possibility for you as well. Having gone through this before, I know that some women just have contractions before active labor. They are annoying and uncomfortable but still harmless. I have heard that upping calcium intake may help. It did not help me much last time and I did not even try this time. Best wishes to you.
FWIW, no matter what the test says I would not go home at all unless I got the steroid shots. Not in a million years.
I hope you get good news soon.
'
I don't think this is how it works though. If the contractions are not shortening her cervix and her test is negative, I don't think they'd give her the shots. I think the issue now is they're not sure if her cervix is shortening since they weren't keeping track of it. CB could just have a short cervix and everything is fine. Some people do have contractions that don't do anything.
I don't think this is how it works though. If the contractions are not shortening her cervix and her test is negative, I don't think they'd give her the shots. I think the issue now is they're not sure if her cervix is shortening since they weren't keeping track of it. CB could just have a short cervix and everything is fine. Some people do have contractions that don't do anything.
At 28 weeks with a short cervix and a history of contractions (active or not) I'd still demand the shots.
I would, too. There is very little down side and they are cheap. Unless my doctors could articulate a very good reason not to get them, I would insist.
I don't think this is how it works though. If the contractions are not shortening her cervix and her test is negative, I don't think they'd give her the shots. I think the issue now is they're not sure if her cervix is shortening since they weren't keeping track of it. CB could just have a short cervix and everything is fine. Some people do have contractions that don't do anything.
At 28 weeks with a short cervix and a history of contractions (active or not) I'd still demand the shots.
Especially if you're having contractions close together that you aren't feeling, so you have no idea if you are having contrax that are 10 min apart or 2 min apart.
Ditto all the other preemie moms - I would be demanding those shots. There isn't a downside (again, unless there is something with your heart I don't know about).
She's a woman so she should absolutely know that there would be less discomfort if she gave me the opportunity to relax and went slow. I don't think I'm being unfair with that expectation in the least. She knows how the female body works, and knows my body was not ready for a dry glove. (Pea sized bit of lube on tip of finger, that's it.)
Yeah, but "20 minutes into foreplay"? This is her job, she should slow down, but not take 20 minutes to do something routine. The expectation to slow down is fair and i agreed with you in that, the comparison to foreplay is what I think goes a bit far.
lay off CloudBee. She's going through a rough enough time as it is. Your nitpicking is obnoxious and unnecessary.
Ditto all the other preemie moms - I would be demanding those shots. There isn't a downside (again, unless there is something with your heart I don't know about).
I am certain the preemie moms on here know more about this than me so please correct me if this is totally off-base, but I thought the reason they are reluctant to give moms the steroid shots until it is clear that labor is imminent is because they are most effective the first time they are given. So if you get them at 28 weeks and don't have the baby then, but then wind up in labor at 31 weeks, getting them early did more harm than good since you can't get the full benefit of the shots at 31 weeks.
**I have done no research on this and have not spoken with a doctor about it--I just recall that they wouldn't give my BFF the shots when she was on hospital bedrest with her triplets at 28 weeks and that was the reason given. She did get them at 32 weeks right before her kids were born.
I agree with swank. Research has shown that they are effective for 6w and it's really hard to determine how the effectiveness wears off as time goes on because like swank said, obviously a baby at 32w is going to have better lung function than a 28w baby regardless of steroids shots (barring any other complications). But I would rather be safe that sorry and it seems SO silly to me that they didn't give her the first one 24 hours ago, because what if she was in labor and now there isn't time to get them and she could have had one, which would help.
Ditto swank and ijack. Also, the 28-30 week time frame is usually the tipping point for ventilator v no vent, so I would do everything possible to avoid an increased likelihood that my baby would be vented.
CB - I really hope all of this is precautionary and nothing happens for a long time.