Its an old nest joke about SNAP. "No skittles for poor people."
ETA: Sorry, didn't explain it. Its a one-liner about judging "poor" people's spending habits. You know, since they are getting taxpayer food, they aren't allowed to have treats like candy and such. Kind of the same idea and judging a coach purse in the SS office, people with cell phones paying with food stamps, etc. Usually said by someone who does not agree.
CVS doesn't agree with the sentiment
Ohh I see. Yeah I get that a lot. For Christmas this year my mom bought me a large black Vera Bradley bag to replace the wal mart diaper bag I've had since my son was born. Whenever we are at the store, people give me weird looks when they see it. :/
I think anyone is entitled to spending $25 a month on fun. Especially with a kid involved and a pass to something fun and educational for kids. Sheesh.
I think anyone is entitled to spending $25 a month on fun. Especially with a kid involved and a pass to something fun and educational for kids. Sheesh.
My comment was made because her mom pays some of her bills and she says she hates being poor. There are plenty of free thing you can do for fun.
I think anyone is entitled to spending $25 a month on fun. Especially with a kid involved and a pass to something fun and educational for kids. Sheesh.
My comment was made because her mom pays some of her bills and she says she hates being poor. There are plenty of free thing you can do for fun.
I didn't ask for any advice on what to cut or how to live my life. I asked for advice on what to do with any extra money we have at the end of each month.
I know this wasn't asked, and it's probably something you would not take advantage of. But lots of daycares around here provide care on a sliding scale, based on your income. If something happened with your MIL providing care, this could be an option for you
Put the money in savings. You are three-four weeks of bad luck away from being homeless. And get a job, any job, anywhere, and get some money in savings. I am not surprised in the slightest at the size of the tax return. If the OP was in college last year, there's a 2500 dollar tax credit she's entitled to get, and an additional 4500 deduction for tuition and school expenses, and a 1200 credit for her kid, and probably they qualify for an earned income tax credit as well given their low income. Just hang on to the cash. You need a cushion, and you don't have it. Do not spend it, or hand it out to relatives, or whatever. SAVE IT. If your dh loses his job, or dies, or leaves you, you have got to have cash on hand.
We would never be homeless, but I get what you are saying. I don't get the tuition tax credit because I completed my bachelors on a full scholarship and didn't have to pay for anything school related. After paying off debt, we are putting all of the rest in savings. After that, we are going to add any extra each month to it. My mom and I talked earlier and she told me she wouldn't accept money from me, so I think I will just treat her to lunch or a pedicure sometimes.
I know this wasn't asked, and it's probably something you would not take advantage of. But lots of daycares around here provide care on a sliding scale, based on your income. If something happened with your MIL providing care, this could be an option for you
We have looked into it. A lot of places in my area have a large waiting list for state assistance with daycare. But if anything ever happened with my MIL, we would definitely dive into it further.
If your husband works at a theme park, you don't need the Seaworld passes. You can go to the theme park in which he works for free (well, there are restrictions, but you know)...
Busch Gardens is too, too far away for you if you live where I think you do (Orlando area more than Tampa, right?) I know you bring your food, but what about parking there or at SeaWorld, and the gas to get there and the wear and tear on the car---it's a full day trip for me and the drive back is like 2 hours.
If your husband works at a theme park, you don't need the Seaworld passes. You can go to the theme park in which he works for free (well, there are restrictions, but you know)...
Busch Gardens is too, too far away for you if you live where I think you do (Orlando area more than Tampa, right?) I know you bring your food, but what about parking there or at SeaWorld, and the gas to get there and the wear and tear on the car---it's a full day trip for me and the drive back is like 2 hours.
So I'd skip that Seaworld pass for now.
I think other than that, you are doing okay.
We do get into Disney for free. However, we can only go 16 times a year an it's subject to block out dates. For example, we were blocked out of Magic Kingdom from the first week in December to February 22 of 2013. I know I said "only 16 times" and that sounds completely ridiculous to the majority of people, but we go there a lot. We don't spend full days at Disney because of nap time and my husband working.
The SeaWorld pass includes free parking. There is also a free shuttle bus that takes pass holders and paying guests to Busch Gardens. We always take that. We never drive ourselves.
I see where people are going with the SeaWorld passes, but I disagree with them. You are on a bare bones budget and you have no entertainment of any kind, really. When I was a kid we had Six Flags passes that we used multiple weeknights in the summer and many weekend days. We went all the damn time, and it was endless entertainment for us kids.
I personally think it's best to take the long view on paying back your family. Step One is to have enough of a cushion that you don't need money from them if you have a bad month. That's the best thing you can do for them right now; get on your feet. So I vote to put all the extra in savings. Later on down the line you can pay them back when you have the money and you're financially secure.
I see where people are going with the SeaWorld passes, but I disagree with them. You are on a bare bones budget and you have no entertainment of any kind, really. When I was a kid we had Six Flags passes that we used multiple weeknights in the summer and many weekend days. We went all the damn time, and it was endless entertainment for us kids.
I personally think it's best to take the long view on paying back your family. Step One is to have enough of a cushion that you don't need money from them if you have a bad month. That's the best thing you can do for them right now; get on your feet. So I vote to put all the extra in savings. Later on down the line you can pay them back when you have the money and you're financially secure.
I'm not willing to budge at all on the seaworld passes. Especially considering what I said in my OP about the price difference. Once we are stable we would buy them again and we would waste a ton of money. I just can't see us doing that.
Very good point with your last paragraph. I would love to be able to save it all and then buy them really great presents for Christmad next year. It would make me very happy!
Well I might be flamed but oh well. You put the information out there and asked for help, so here is my advice.
Are people, even people who are struggling, entitled to have fun money esp. with a kid? Yes. But you also are not paying all your bills either. I think if you have extra money to spend on Sea World every month, you could instead use that money to pay one of the bills your mom is currently paying for you. There are lots of free/cheaper fun and educational things you can do with kids. Hang out at a park. Visit a museum, which is often free for little kids and nominal for you guys. Go to the library, pick out some books and read together/read to your child. Have a picnic in the park or at home. Camp in the backyard (if you have a yard). The list goes on. Sea World is not the only choice for entertainment esp. when Mom is still paying some of your bills.
I would take the extra welfare money you have leftover each month and use it on food for yourselves. Things that won't go bad, for instance. When you do get a job you may not qualify for welfare and this way you can build up a stockpile. Or use it to buy things like TP, cleaners (if this stuff qualifies for the program).
A minimum wage job is better than no job. If you are vigorously looking for work and want a job really badly like you sound like you do, then if it were me, I'd be ecstatic with a min. wage job. My H had to work a min. wage job for a couple years because he couldn't find a job in his field and we needed a second income. Two years later he got a much better job and is much happier. But we needed to be able to pay bills and pay rent, so he did what he had to do. Min. wage jobs are not all sucky and it is something that could bring in an extra $1K a month, which is still $1K more than you are bringing in now.
I think anyone is entitled to spending $25 a month on fun. Especially with a kid involved and a pass to something fun and educational for kids. Sheesh.
Agreed. AE, you seem to be doing the best you can in a tough situation. Good luck with finding a job.
Thank you! I'm also not blaming my situation on anything but myself. I really do appreciate all of the kind words and advice I've received!
If your husband works at a theme park, you don't need the Seaworld passes. You can go to the theme park in which he works for free (well, there are restrictions, but you know)...
Busch Gardens is too, too far away for you if you live where I think you do (Orlando area more than Tampa, right?) I know you bring your food, but what about parking there or at SeaWorld, and the gas to get there and the wear and tear on the car---it's a full day trip for me and the drive back is like 2 hours.
So I'd skip that Seaworld pass for now.
I think other than that, you are doing okay.
We do get into Disney for free. However, we can only go 16 times a year an it's subject to block out dates. For example, we were blocked out of Magic Kingdom from the first week in December to February 22 of 2013. I know I said "only 16 times" and that sounds completely ridiculous to the majority of people, but we go there a lot. We don't spend full days at Disney because of nap time and my husband working.
The SeaWorld pass includes free parking. There is also a free shuttle bus that takes pass holders and paying guests to Busch Gardens. We always take that. We never drive ourselves.
I'm a Disney passholder myself (well, I was, I let it expire as I am not in the position to afford it right now even though I make 3x what you make and don't have a kid or spouse), so I do know about the blackout dates. They are reasonable. I never had a problem working around them, planned carefully, and really looked forward to our trips.
You're telling me that, multiple times a year, you are getting on a shuttle bus at Seaworld and going to Busch Gardens across the state with an infant? Doesn't that take like the entire day out and back?
I was a Disney passholder and, if we made it out 5 times in a year, we considered that a decent amount. That's plenty---how much entertainment do you need? I guess I work too damn much though.
There's not that much to do at Busch Gardens or Seaworld that you need the annual pass. Just saying, as a Florida resident...
Also, if your husband works at Disney, then can't you work there too...what about at the call center or the cruise line over in Celebration? Your husband and you could work the schedule out to have different shifts.
Also, you know if you are Disney, you can get signed in...
I have a cheaper park alternative for you too---get the after 2 water park passes. There's your entertainment and it's like half the cost!
I understand that this is the OP's only entertainment but she can go to Disney for free.
We do get into Disney for free. However, we can only go 16 times a year an it's subject to block out dates. For example, we were blocked out of Magic Kingdom from the first week in December to February 22 of 2013. I know I said "only 16 times" and that sounds completely ridiculous to the majority of people, but we go there a lot. We don't spend full days at Disney because of nap time and my husband working.
The SeaWorld pass includes free parking. There is also a free shuttle bus that takes pass holders and paying guests to Busch Gardens. We always take that. We never drive ourselves.
I'm a Disney passholder myself (well, I was, I let it expire as I am not in the position to afford it right now even though I make 3x what you make and don't have a kid or spouse), so I do know about the blackout dates. They are reasonable. I never had a problem working around them, planned carefully, and really looked forward to our trips.
You're telling me that, multiple times a year, you are getting on a shuttle bus at Seaworld and going to Busch Gardens across the state with an infant? Doesn't that take like the entire day out and back?
I was a Disney passholder and, if we made it out 5 times in a year, we considered that a decent amount. That's plenty---how much entertainment do you need? I guess I work too damn much though.
There's not that much to do at Busch Gardens or Seaworld that you need the annual pass. Just saying, as a Florida resident...
Also, if your husband works at Disney, then can't you work there too...what about at the call center or the cruise line over in Celebration? Your husband and you could work the schedule out to have different shifts.
Also, you know if you are Disney, you can get signed in...
I have a cheaper park alternative for you too---get the after 2 water park passes. There's your entertainment and it's like half the cost!
I understand that this is the OP's only entertainment but she can go to Disney for free.
I have no idea what you mean by I can get signed in. I used to work at Disney. I hated it and I will not work there again. I really don't need to justify that.
I also don't need to justify spending 25 a month on fun for my family. We like seaworld and Busch gardens more than Disney. That happens quickly once you've worked there. An it only takes an hour and 30 minutes to get to Busch Gardens. We go about 3 or 4 times a year.
Once again, I didn't ask you if I should cut anything. I asked what to do with excess money when we have it.
Well I might be flamed but oh well. You put the information out there and asked for help, so here is my advice.
Are people, even people who are struggling, entitled to have fun money esp. with a kid? Yes. But you also are not paying all your bills either. I think if you have extra money to spend on Sea World every month, you could instead use that money to pay one of the bills your mom is currently paying for you. There are lots of free/cheaper fun and educational things you can do with kids. Hang out at a park. Visit a museum, which is often free for little kids and nominal for you guys. Go to the library, pick out some books and read together/read to your child. Have a picnic in the park or at home. Camp in the backyard (if you have a yard). The list goes on. Sea World is not the only choice for entertainment esp. when Mom is still paying some of your bills.
I would take the extra welfare money you have leftover each month and use it on food for yourselves. Things that won't go bad, for instance. When you do get a job you may not qualify for welfare and this way you can build up a stockpile. Or use it to buy things like TP, cleaners (if this stuff qualifies for the program).
A minimum wage job is better than no job. If you are vigorously looking for work and want a job really badly like you sound like you do, then if it were me, I'd be ecstatic with a min. wage job. My H had to work a min. wage job for a couple years because he couldn't find a job in his field and we needed a second income. Two years later he got a much better job and is much happier. But we needed to be able to pay bills and pay rent, so he did what he had to do. Min. wage jobs are not all sucky and it is something that could bring in an extra $1K a month, which is still $1K more than you are bringing in now.
I really wish you would read my other replies before you comment with very rude remarks.
ETA: food stamps doesn't cover toilet paper or anything except food. Please don't comment on something if you have no idea what you're talking about.
I'm sorry I'm getting really defensive now. But some people are coming here, not reading anything that I've written, and are being down right rude.
First, I give you all the respect in the world. You got through college under trying circumstances on a full scholarship. That is NOT EASY. By your posts here you are clearly a smart person who fighting through circumstances to create the life you want. Seriously, kudos! And I hope you de-lurk/ de-ae and stick around; join us on the MMM board!
I also have no problem with you using government and family assistance where it's available. These programs are there for a reason and you're smart enough to take advantage in a responsible manner.
I agree with your plan to pay off all debts and stockpile the rest of your tax return in savings. What expenses do you anticipate coming up? For example, do you have a professional wardrobe for when you DO have a job, or an interview? (I suspect you must, given the internships). Building that up could set you back a bit. How about potential moving expenses?
Good luck with things! I think you're on the right track.
First, I give you all the respect in the world. You got through college under trying circumstances on a full scholarship. That is NOT EASY. By your posts here you are clearly a smart person who fighting through circumstances to create the life you want. Seriously, kudos! And I hope you de-lurk/ de-ae and stick around; join us on the MMM board!
I also have no problem with you using government and family assistance where it's available. These programs are there for a reason and you're smart enough to take advantage in a responsible manner.
I agree with your plan to pay off all debts and stockpile the rest of your tax return in savings. What expenses do you anticipate coming up? For example, do you have a professional wardrobe for when you DO have a job, or an interview? (I suspect you must, given the internships). Building that up could set you back a bit. How about potential moving expenses?
Good luck with things! I think you're on the right track.
Thank you so much. This reply really means a lot to me.
I do have a professional wardrobe already, thank god. That would be a huge expense. We have pretty good credit so for our new apartment we qualified for only a $200 security deposit. My husband works for one of their preferred employers so we only had to put down a $100 holding fee. I used some of my graduation money for these bills. We also don't need to rent a u-haul or anything because we have amazing friends and family with trucks and vans who have all offered to help move us.
Post by liveintheville on Jan 5, 2013 18:57:14 GMT -5
I agree with the others on saving the extra. As long as your families are financially stable at this point, I'd hold on to it. Then when you're in a better financial position you can pay them back.
Really the breakdown doesn't matter. You're doing what you can on very limited funds and you are accepting help that is needed. I doubt your MIL is demanding that $25/mo for childcare. And if you were to cut it, it sounds like your families are very generous and would gift it to you anyway. Regardless people are arguing over semantics.
Well I might be flamed but oh well. You put the information out there and asked for help, so here is my advice.
Are people, even people who are struggling, entitled to have fun money esp. with a kid? Yes. But you also are not paying all your bills either. I think if you have extra money to spend on Sea World every month, you could instead use that money to pay one of the bills your mom is currently paying for you. There are lots of free/cheaper fun and educational things you can do with kids. Hang out at a park. Visit a museum, which is often free for little kids and nominal for you guys. Go to the library, pick out some books and read together/read to your child. Have a picnic in the park or at home. Camp in the backyard (if you have a yard). The list goes on. Sea World is not the only choice for entertainment esp. when Mom is still paying some of your bills.
I would take the extra welfare money you have leftover each month and use it on food for yourselves. Things that won't go bad, for instance. When you do get a job you may not qualify for welfare and this way you can build up a stockpile. Or use it to buy things like TP, cleaners (if this stuff qualifies for the program).
A minimum wage job is better than no job. If you are vigorously looking for work and want a job really badly like you sound like you do, then if it were me, I'd be ecstatic with a min. wage job. My H had to work a min. wage job for a couple years because he couldn't find a job in his field and we needed a second income. Two years later he got a much better job and is much happier. But we needed to be able to pay bills and pay rent, so he did what he had to do. Min. wage jobs are not all sucky and it is something that could bring in an extra $1K a month, which is still $1K more than you are bringing in now.
I really wish you would read my other replies before you comment with very rude remarks.
ETA: food stamps doesn't cover toilet paper or anything except food. Please don't comment on something if you have no idea what you're talking about.
I'm sorry I'm getting really defensive now. But some people are coming here, not reading anything that I've written, and are being down right rude.
Actually I read every post. Every single post. It doesn't change my mind one iota. And notice I said in parenthesis if this stuff qualifies for the program. I never said it did. I also said you could stockpile unperishable food, so I don't see how that advice would change at all.
ETA: I'm unclear on which posts of yours you think I didn't read. Yes I read the Sea World thing and that it's your only form of entertainment. I gave you options for other free/cheaper entertainment. yes I read the price will go up in the future. It would still save you money NOW to not pay for it.
I also don't see why you ignored my comments about taking a min. wage job. You said you didn't want to settle for less and set a deadline for yourself. If I needed money, my deadline would be right now. I would settle for anything I could get.
I want to echo pps that said you are doing well with what you have. Sounds like you have a good plan. I wish you luck! I understand how frustrating a job search can be.
If you talked to your mom (or his mom? not sure) and they won't accept money from you; save it. Keep a savings account.
I get it; we were "poor" too once. I didn't have a job and was going to school and my h was laid off a month before our wedding. That's scary. We didn't have furniture and bought a couch for $700 and had to make $30 payments on it. A couch!
Keep the seaworld pass. $25 is not a lot for a month of entertainment. If you get good use of it, then by all means keep it. Some people are weird in this post.
Also, this is flameful; but I don't see an issue with using the foodstamps and "letting" your family take things or cook dinner or whatnot. To some people, it may not be "ethical" but I guess I don't have high morals or ethics to begin with.
Start a savings account; save as much as you can. Enjoy your time with your son whilst looking for a job. Get a job at Target/Taco Bell/wherever and still search for a hotel job.
BTW, I worked a hotel front desk for two years; I give you props for being able to handle that industry; it drove me crazy!
Thank you! I actually am not too crazy about the industry either. But it's the best degree to have in Central Florida! I'm trying to look for more behind the scenes jobs. I worked at Disney for 2 years which was terrible, and my last internship I did was a night audit position at a hotel. I worked 11pm-7am 5 days a week while going to school 2 days and taking care of my son during the day.
They offered me a full time position as a permanent night audit but I physically couldn't do it anymore. I was constantly sick from not getting any sleep. :/
And it was my mom I talked to. She is the financial help when we need it. I love her and am so grateful for her! I literally would not have my son without her.
I really wish you would read my other replies before you comment with very rude remarks.
ETA: food stamps doesn't cover toilet paper or anything except food. Please don't comment on something if you have no idea what you're talking about.
I'm sorry I'm getting really defensive now. But some people are coming here, not reading anything that I've written, and are being down right rude.
Actually I read every post. Every single post. It doesn't change my mind one iota. And notice I said in parenthesis if this stuff qualifies for the program. I never said it did. I also said you could stockpile unperishable food, so I don't see how that advice would change at all.
ETA: I'm unclear on which posts of yours you think I didn't read. Yes I read the Sea World thing and that it's your only form of entertainment. I gave you options for other free/cheaper entertainment. yes I read the price will go up in the future. It would still save you money NOW to not pay for it.
I also don't see why you ignored my comments about taking a min. wage job. You said you didn't want to settle for less and set a deadline for yourself. If I needed money, my deadline would be right now. I would settle for anything I could get.
If you looked at my budget, we don't really "need" money right now. My mom has done this for all her kids: cell phones and car insurance until they graduate college. She's going to help me out until I can get a job. If I don't find something in the next 2-3 months, I'll go the minimum wage route. I'm sorry but that's my plan and I will stick to it.
What advice are you asking for exactly? You say you don't "need" money and you have excess, yet your mother is covering expenses for you. You have no savings. You have no line in your budget for household stuff that SNAP doesn't cover... toilet paper, toiletries, haircuts, car maintainence, ect. You're saying that you don't want to settle for a job, but you hate being poor but you'll consider a minimum wage job later.