Because I can't always trust DH to keep his mouth shut. He's screwed me over on this once big time- when he told my parents my sister was dying while I was trying to encourage her to be honest with them. It was her news to share even if my parents had a need to know. The debate raged over how to manage the situation for about 4 months. It was an ugly time having the news hanging over my head.
The drama that ensued wasn't worth it. It annoys the crap out of him that I sometimes share with my BFF and not him. He only has himself to blame.
I can't make that promise and no one should expect me to keep anything from H. If they insist I don't, I tell them I'm not the right person to tell and they should tell someone else.
My friends' husbands are my husband's best friends. And dh is a talker. So I really can't tell my dh which sucks because a lot of big things have come up that I am now keeping secret.
I would probably give him a heads up about the topic and that I suspect friend will be wanting to talk about it with him. Or if it was my friend I would say "x has confided that there are some really serious problems in her marriage. She asked me not to share the details with you right now, but in case I suddenly need to spend a weekend consoling her, wanted you to be prepared" I have done this so he understands if suddenly our plans change because friend needed me.
But I wouldn't give him any of the details of the discussion if specifically asked not too.
I sure do and he does with me. Well, with the exception of SD SOMETIMES. If she just tells me something in confidence that isn't concerning to me, I don't necessarily share it with H.
when someone says that I say "Then I don't want to know... if its something I can't tell my DH then I don't want to know about it. I don't keep secrets"