Another AE with a life problem. Go figure.

[toph]

Just paste some glitter on your H and call it a day.

[flex]

It's funny how day-to-day living can color your opinion of a spouse. You are romanticizing the "other guy". Let's say you did run off and marry him--eventually reality would set in. Having fantasies about a man is one thing; having cornflakes for breakfast with him each and every day is another thing.

[WOT?*]

I did the fairy-tales, married the military guy, had kids and looked for the happily-ever-after, grass-is-greener. Speaking as a (former) military spouse, the life sucks and there is no knight-on-a-white-stallion-happily-ever-after, especially for a guy who has no life, no car and no responsibility. Even WE were able to afford a car and pay our bills when XH was a lowly low-level-enlisted. He doesn't have that now, why do you think he would have it with you? I can tell you if he was any kind of winner at all you wouldn't be saying "no this, no that, no responsibilities." You want Christian Gray (or Grey or whatever) talk to your DH and let him know what you want and need in bed and out. It's called COMMUNICATION. Figure out what is causing your dissatisfaction, talk to your DH and work on it. You don't have to live a fantasy life in your head if you bring it into your real life. Do it with the guy you promised the happily-ever-after.

By the way, what you're missing is the excitement. You've got a kid and a life that you find onerous.   Make it less so and involve your DH in it before he becomes an XH.  And yes, responsibility sucks but even if you walked out the door you'd still have responsibilities.  Unless you plan on leaving the kid with DH and trailing this guy with nothing holding you back or tying you down.  Deal with it.

I've been with my DH 19 years now and he still holds my hand and thinks I'm hot - I'm not but he thinks so and it helps. We snuggle on the sofa, I scratch his calves and we genuinely like to spend time together. Get back to thinking your DH is the shizz and live like he is. (And no, I haven't read 50 shades, etc. and that shit's not part of our sex life but I thought I'd toss that bomb out there and see if an improved sex life might give you some impetus since that seems to be part of what you're fantasizing about and think you're missing.) The grands go to the other grandparents' house one weekend every month or two and we make date-nights of it. We talk at the table and after the girls go to bed, or in the morning if I'm awake before he leaves for work (I'm SAHing with my granddaughters for the present). Kids can be draining, life can be draining. It's up to you to find the moments that make it worthwhile. Quit dredging up the misery and fantasizing that life would be better with some schmuck that has no respect for boundaries or for your marriage.

[karmasabiotch]

How old are you?

We all have what if's about everything in our life. You know this unless your in middle school. Grow up and get over it. Or destroy your family and indulge. Its your destiny you decide how you want to live it.