Post by starrieskies on Jul 31, 2013 10:12:54 GMT -5
I hadn't replied previously, but in light of cortana's comments I feel the need to say that I have been pregnant a total of 4 times. One child was placed with an adoptive family, I had one abortion (surgical), one miscarriage, and I have one child. I made each of those decisions (obviously the miscarriage was not a decision) on a case by case basis and I do not regret any of them.
You have to do what is right for you and your family. If you are confident and comfortable with your decision, that's all that matters. You have our support!
Sorry to hear that you find yourself in an uncomfortable situation. It sounds very scary and stressful. I do want to gently ask, why do you consider an abortion the right thing for your family at this time? If it is, and you are resolved on this choice and feel it's necessary, then that's your call. You don't have to answer...I just encourage you to examine the possibility of keeping the pregnancy. I understand that financially it might not be the best time, due to a variety of factors – employment, saving for a house, etc. Perhaps a second child interferes with major life plans or would complicate existing health issues. Why do you believe that an abortion is your only option at this point?
Everyone here is very supportive when people post about making such a serious decision, and I just want to say that sometimes having an abortion is NOT the best decision and does NOT have the best outcome despite the fact that many people offer anecdotal evidence that it was “right for them”. The fact that your husband finds this decision morally distressing could come back to haunt you later. Of course it is YOUR body, but your husband’s feelings on this matter are important as well. Years from now, if your son were to find out about your abortion, would you be able to explain to him why you did it with the same conviction that you have today?
I do not mean to offend you and only hope to help. I understand this is a very complex and emotional decision to make.
Hey Cortana, go ahead and kiss my ass. I put in my updates that my mind is made up and my husband's mind is made up. You really think my decision was came to lightly? No. We weighed the options and picked what is best for us.
Btw, you fail at reading. I didn't say H was feeling guilty or remorseful. I said he's a tiny bit religious so he's processing our decision differently than I am. He never wanted to keep it. So go ahead and stick your "your H is going to resent you later" opinion straight up your ass.
Lastly, my reasons are nunya. Nunya damn business. I came here for support from my board friends, not to be guilt tripped by random lurkers.
Now you may go crawl back into whatever hole you came from and you might consider picking a weaker opponent next time.
And yes, I'm aware that I just outed myself. I'm over it and don't need the AE anymore. Thanks for sticking up for me everyone. And for the support. I appreciate it.
Chirp, I'm glad you were able to get support here and that you and your husband made this decision together and will be going to the appointment together.
Cortana, you clearly failed at reading comprehension and your posts didn't come across as trying to help, but instead trying to guilt. Not cool. I'd still love to hear your response to Kuus' suggestion.
I had my appointment. I go back for an ultrasound in a week (the dr just has to be able to date the pregnancy). The week after that, I go in for a D&E.
There's a clinic nearby that I can go to for the pills, but there's protesters. The doctor there wears a flak jacket and the protesters are known for accosting people who go in. Just to see, we drove past. The protesters started 5 blocks away.
For added awesomeness, I found out that my state requires a few things before an abortion is performed... An ultrasound, a pamphlet explaining that I can keep the baby and I have to look through a book showing aborted embryos and fetuses from various stages of pregnancy (which is out of print and cannot be purchased anywhere, so I just say that I saw it). ^o)
Chirp, that sucks. I'm sorry you have to go through all of that.
And seriously, fuck the lawmakers who think these restrictions and loopholes are okay. Fuck these men (because they're almost always mostly men) who think it's okay to dictate how a woman and her doctor should handle this kind of situation.
Ugh. So annoying and so completely unnecessary. Also, WTF at them requiring you look at anything that you are expected to procure for yourself- not that I wouldn't be happy to skip it. Will you say what state this is?
I think you might be glad that you are doing the D&E over the pill. It should be less painful physically for you and it's more efficient, so you can just get it over with.
I hate that you have to drag this out over so many weeks when I'm sure you are ready now.
Ugh. So annoying and so completely unnecessary. Also, WTF at them requiring you look at anything that you are expected to procure for yourself- not that I wouldn't be happy to skip it. Will you say what state this is?
I think you might be glad that you are doing the D&E over the pill. It should be less painful physically for you and it's more efficient, so you can just get it over with.
I hate that you have to drag this out over so many weeks when I'm sure you are ready now.
I'm in PA.
I've read that about the D&E vs the pill. The doctor from the clinic is going to call me tonight to go over that option. They're just making sure I have the information for both options, but I have the D&E all scheduled and ready to go.
Hey chirp- sorry I meant to come back in here earlier. I didn't have a bad experience with the pill (truth is, I've done it twice) but the second time I had to do it twice because and my recheck I had retained some tissue /blood. That was shitty. I think the d&e is a fast effective choice. Big hugs to you.
Post by starrieskies on Aug 1, 2013 11:55:37 GMT -5
One should NEVER be allowed to make laws regarding body parts that they do not have!! That makes me so mad for you!
I'm so sorry you have to go through all this! I do agree that from what I've heard the D & E is easier than the pill. I only have experience with one of them, so I don't consider myself highly educated on the subject, but if I had to make that choice again I'm pretty sure I'd go with the D & E. Of course, it's not my body we're talking about, so you do what you think is best and we will support you either way!