That's why it's flameful, because I know people will disagree.
I'm going to "just wait" you on this, even though I hate when women do that, because I get the eye rolly thing when all you know is infant. I still had some semblance of my life with an infant. With a toddler and a second child, 95% of my waking hours are spent fulfilling someone else's needs. You can bet that the day they're both in school, I will be celebrating with a book, a pedicure, lunch out that I don't have to share, and a marathon of TV shows with dirty words I don't want my kid to repeat.
And that's just off the top of my head. I love being a mom, and my boys are wonderful, but holy hell do I crave my pre kid life some days.
My flameful is that I am rolling my eyes hard at someone who posted that they "finally have their life back" now that both of their kids are in school full-time. Good for you?
It's hard to explain, but it is a totally rational thought. By the time a person has been parenting for 6+ years, a scheduled break from it feels like returning to the world of grown ups, I assume. And multiple kids are alllll consuming.
It's hard to explain, but it is a totally rational thought. By the time a person has been parenting for 6+ years, a scheduled break from it feels like returning to the world of grown ups, I assume. And multiple kids are alllll consuming.
I guess if you are a SAHM it could make sense since you are with your kids 24/7. Maybe I'm just sensitive because I wish I was with my baby more and I can't imagine feeling like "oh I have my life back now" because I feel like she IS my life and I want her to be, you know? I guess it's just the way it was worded, read kind of harshly to me?
Eh, I knew this would get a rise out of people, that's why it's flameful
Yeah, I get it. I was in the exact same place once.
My flameful is that I am rolling my eyes hard at someone who posted that they "finally have their life back" now that both of their kids are in school full-time. Good for you?
One child is SO different than 2 or more. I work part time and am happy to send my 3 kids off to school, BUT I very much look forward to seeing them when they come home. As your child (children) get older, they become more work. Less physically, but much more emotionally draining (and rewarding!) At least when they're at school I can formulate my own thoughts, I'm not fucking kidding. ETA: my flameful, there was a beautiful man taking my class tonight and after class he came to talk with me and I got all embarrassingly high-schooly, and giggly. WTF. I caught myself and toned it down in hopes my other members didn't notice :/
Sometimes I feel bad that putting DD in daycare wasn't difficult for me. I mean, leading up to it was sad, but mainly because I didn't know what to expect.
Then, when I wasn't "on call" for baby all day long by myself, I was like, "yesssssssss."
I can only imagine how I'll feel when we have more and they're older. I'm sure the school bus driver will catch me dancing in the rearview mirror as he/she drives away with my kids.
Look, once that kid starts moving, it's hard to get anything done. If I was a SAHM and my kids were finally in school, I would be so glad when I could poop in peace and actually finish a cup of coffee.
It's hard to explain, but it is a totally rational thought. By the time a person has been parenting for 6+ years, a scheduled break from it feels like returning to the world of grown ups, I assume. And multiple kids are alllll consuming.
I guess if you are a SAHM it could make sense since you are with your kids 24/7. Maybe I'm just sensitive because I wish I was with my baby more and I can't imagine feeling like "oh I have my life back now" because I feel like she IS my life and I want her to be, you know? I guess it's just the way it was worded, read kind of harshly to me?
Eh, I knew this would get a rise out of people, that's why it's flameful
Oh dear. Your baby is like eleven seconds old. You'll get there. Fuck, I'm there some days and I'm only a few months ahead of you.
Confession/vent: I feel like I can't join in discussions & complain about being tired to my nursing school classmates because they all have kids and I don't. I can still be tired though, right? I'm not comparing my tired to your tired, it's not a contest, BUT IF IT WERE YOU WOULD WIN!
I also feel like I can't vent to my nursing school classmates. I have two little kids, but I don't have an outside job. Most of them have both.
I think the bottom line is that nursing school is fucking hard and we're all exhausted and stressed. We just start at different baselines. We need to be tired together!
I really do think you should just quit if you want Verona. If your H is supportive and y'all can financially swing it I don't think you'll regret it. I tried to power through and I regret it.
Look, I have a dog that has had severe separation anxiety for most of his life. Like... physically hurt himself resulting in vet trips when left alone separation anxiety. We have finally worked through it with very careful training. Today my husband and I left the house for a couple hours without him to purchase new glasses. It was one of the first times we have been out together, alone, without the dog being at daycare or arranging for a babysitter.
I completely 100% understand the "finally have my life back" feeling, and I just have a DOG. I don't know SAHM's make it to the school aged years.
This is simultaneously my confession, and my "wtf?" at not being able to understand this feeling.
I really love my job though. It's been easier the last couple of weeks and she's only in daycare 3 days a week. I thought I wouldn't be able to do it but I've actually been enjoying coming home to her after work and I find myself really cherishing our time together more. I surprised myself sort of.
I'm so sick of one of my friends. I've known this girl for nearly 20 years now. We're not close anymore, but stay in touch on FB.
She has just become so... idk, militant? She's always angry, at least on FB. She takes everything 100% seriously and is always starting fights or calling people out for things. It gets really old.
Today, someone posted about the weather here (hot now, cold later this week) and another person (who angry friend knows) said something about the weather being bi-polar.
I realize some people are offended by that term being used that way, but she really flew off the handle at this girl. It didn't get her point across, but instead made angry friend look a little crazy. Her posts are just always like this lately, like everybody is wrong, everybody sucks, the world sucks, etc. I'm just really tired of it and about to defriend.
I have a friend like this too. She also goes through "phases" where she is really into something (ie gluten free, paleo, cross-fit) and so ALL of her posts for a few months will be about whatever she is into, and everyone else is WRONG.
She will fly off the handle if you post something like "mmmmmm brownies for dinner" about how awful they are you.
I brought home four brownies from my mom's house with the intention of eating 2 and giving the other 2 to H. But he pissed me off tonight, so I am keeping all 4 to myself.
I'm actually really freaking irritated by her attempt to shame people for not having the proper adoration for selfless motherhood.
It was the way it was worded that was off putting to me. Anyway all moms should have other interests and hobbies because you're a better mom when you take care of yourself too but like I said it was the wording that got me.
But some moms don't get a lot of breaks OR have time for hobbies. Some moms don't love their jobs.
Some moms are working moms of two and the only time they get to have a cup of coffee on the way to work in their car in compete silence after daycare drop off and they freaking look forward to that moment every day. (Hint, that's me)
It doesn't mean they don't look forward to their evenings with their kids. It means they are going to enjoy that break that school/daycare gives them.
My dh works 70 hours a week. I don't even get time alone to do laundry alone. Also, look at my cute baby. I wish I could do laundry without her. But I still lover her. Lol.
You know when someone offers to go get you food and you're soooo looking forward to it? You text them your order, just so you know they'll get it right.
And that food is all you can think about while they're gone. Sounding even better than before.
Then, when they get back with your food, it's got extra stuff and missing the MOST important part of the meal, the key part that makes you drool just thinking about.
Little BIL got my Chipotle order wrong. Tomatoes are the devil and where the fuck is my dressing? Who eats salad with out dressing? NOT ME. Their dressing is so damn good, too.
Then, I spilled on the carpet. That did me in.
Internally, I'm yelling, "Fuck this, I'm not eating."
Externally: "Anyone want some salad? I'm not hungry anymore."
All the while, MIL is repeatedly asking if I want to go and get something else, while I'm cleaning up my mess. If I wanted to go anywhere...I would have fucking gone myself. You offered, I accepted. LEAVE ME ALONE WHILE I SULK.
But some moms don't get a lot of breaks OR have time for hobbies. Some moms don't love their jobs.
Some moms are working moms of two and the only time they get to have a cup of coffee on the way to work in their car in compete silence after daycare drop off and they freaking look forward to that moment every day. (Hint, that's me)
It doesn't mean they don't look forward to their evenings with their kids. It means they are going to enjoy that break that school/daycare gives them.
My dh works 70 hours a week. I don't even get time alone to do laundry alone. Also, look at my cute baby. I wish I could do laundry without her. But I still lover her. Lol.
Thanks for posting this. I guess it was just a knee-jerk reaction from me when I read a statement that came off a certain way to me. I can admit when I've said something that may be read into as more than I meant it to be. I love getting some Starbucks at work and sipping it happily by myself as well...and being at work does allow me to have some time away from constant baby duties, so I get it. I guess it just came off in a way that it wasn't intended to (to me) just like what I said came off as something it wasn't intended to in this thread.