I go back and forth to be honest. I really do not feel that we are done with 2, but money is certainly an issue and I do not want to take away from the 2 awesome kiddos I have right now. If we decide that we can swing a third and not screw over the first two, then sure.
My ute is in limbo, but we'll probably end up at 2?
Also, I fucking HATE that I will be 35 in May, nooooooooooooooooooooo
This is basically where we are. We both kind of want another but I am 35 and E is 40 and we are kind of tired. I really don't feel like my family is done. We have casually discussed adopting an older child but we need to get out of NYC before that can happen.
Sucks, right? If I were even 3 years younger, then maybe I would wait 1-2 years and see, but I kinda wanted to be done birthing at 35.....maybe 36 if a lot of money fell into my lap? Yes, we are tired too, and the thought of being able to move on and start to do more things that babies can not do, it very appealing. but but but....to never have another sweet newborn in the house I also think about how mush tougher it would be to travel so much with 3 kids, versus two. When we move, I would hate to move all the baby gear if we are done, but if there is even a chance of a third I do not want to have to re-buy everything either. ugh.....
Post by redmonkeystomper on Feb 2, 2014 16:34:34 GMT -5
I put 2 due to age (I am 35 and my dh is 41) and finances. We are currently thinking about ttc when Ruby is 3-4 because then my SS will be close to finishing highschool and we won't have the child support expense. I always wanted 4 kids though but since I met my dh when we were 'older' it just is not in the cards.
I go back and forth to be honest. I really do not feel that we are done with 2, but money is certainly an issue and I do not want to take away from the 2 awesome kiddos I have right now. If we decide that we can swing a third and not screw over the first two, then sure.
My ute is in limbo, but we'll probably end up at 2?
Also, I fucking HATE that I will be 35 in May, nooooooooooooooooooooo
Dude I'm turning 39 next month. That's one year away from forty. It's so fucking weird because I guess when I was young I thought it sounded old but really I don't feel old. Well I didn't get ID'd today ::sniff::
I go back and forth to be honest. I really do not feel that we are done with 2, but money is certainly an issue and I do not want to take away from the 2 awesome kiddos I have right now. If we decide that we can swing a third and not screw over the first two, then sure.
My ute is in limbo, but we'll probably end up at 2?
Also, I fucking HATE that I will be 35 in May, nooooooooooooooooooooo
Dude I'm turning 39 next month. That's one year away from forty. It's so fucking weird because I guess I when I was young I thought it sounded old but really I don't feel old. Well I didn't get ID'd today ::sniff::
I should clarify, I only hate 35 when it comes to advanced maternal age blah blah blah, otherwise no biggie. I hear ya though 40 did seen old and now we are nearing it. Ahhhh
Dude I'm turning 39 next month. That's one year away from forty. It's so fucking weird because I guess I when I was young I thought it sounded old but really I don't feel old. Well I didn't get ID'd today ::sniff::
I should clarify, I only hate 35 when it comes to advanced maternal age blah blah blah, otherwise no biggie. I hear ya though 40 did seen old and now we are nearing it. Ahhhh
Oh I know! When you are AMA it so reminds you of your age. But I was chiming in because I cannot believe I am about to turn 39, I've been thinking about it a lot lol. Nothing to do with AMA at all.
At this moment of time we are one and done. We have decided that we will put this conversation back on the table next summer. Then we will fully decide. If we decide we are done, DH is going to get snipped.
Post by jalapenopeach on Feb 2, 2014 20:48:34 GMT -5
H and I both want a large family. He's one of 5 and I am an only child. We would both like 5, but we know that's not going to happen. We're currently planning on 3.
I think we just want 2 because of a few different reasons but we've always talked about adopting a 3rd child. My husbands brother is adopted and we would love to give a child a home like his parents did.
I would love 4. I think I will only make it through two more n pregnancies max. Also, we are still undergoing testing to see if we can have any more period and I am so not ready to be done. I have always wanted a big loud family.
We've always talked about 3, but it seems so uneven, like jnoellee said. And the article about 3 being the most stressful #. So I put 4. We've made a rough budget for 3, though, and that's what DH says he wants, so we'll likely stop there. We shall see.
Post by kemangel124 on Feb 2, 2014 22:47:31 GMT -5
DH has finally come around to giving Lila a sibling. Looks like we will be going for #2 in the summer of 2015! My h is an only child so I'm glad he decided it would be good to give L a sibling. I have ALWAYS wanted 3 but I doubt that will happen due to my age!
This is basically where we are. We both kind of want another but I am 35 and E is 40 and we are kind of tired. I really don't feel like my family is done. We have casually discussed adopting an older child but we need to get out of NYC before that can happen.
Sucks, right? If I were even 3 years younger, then maybe I would wait 1-2 years and see, but I kinda wanted to be done birthing at 35.....maybe 36 if a lot of money fell into my lap? Yes, we are tired too, and the thought of being able to move on and start to do more things that babies can not do, it very appealing. but but but....to never have another sweet newborn in the house I also think about how mush tougher it would be to travel so much with 3 kids, versus two. When we move, I would hate to move all the baby gear if we are done, but if there is even a chance of a third I do not want to have to re-buy everything either. ugh.....
I'm in the same boat but I am 2 or 3 years younger (I honestly can't remember how old I am right now). I thought maybe as the kids got older I would feel better about only having two and lose my urge for a baby but I don't feel that way yet. I probably would be KU right now if we weren't so broke.
If finances weren't an issue and we had more involved families (I.e. Help) I'd want 3. But, that isn't reality and my DH wants 2 anyway, so 2 it is! Once we have #2, I'll get my tubes tied during my c-section.
I voted one. I think if we were younger we would go for two, but I will be 34 this month and H will be 40 in September and we don't feel we can handle a close age gap so we'd be like 37 & 43 with a gap we like. Blech, I feel old enough already, lol. Money is an issue, too.
I know I want to have another one so Macy can have a sibling. I don't know after that I guess I'll have to see how I feel. DH would like a bunch of kids but he doesn't think about things like how we'll pay for daycare for all of them. I think it would be cool when they're older to have a bunch of siblings but I don't know if I can handle having too many youngins
I picked 4 because I don't feel done. I never thought I would want a 4th, and NEVER thought I would be able to. I obviously had a really hard pg this past time. The OB thought my ute would be in awful shape, but said it looked just as good as it did after I had DS the 1st time (i.e. 1 large pg, so thin but not dangerous. no windows, etc.). Anyhow, she gave the ok for a 4th while I looked at her like she had 2 heads. We had planned on getting my tubes tied during the last c/s but it didn't feel right and I just panicked and started crying every time I thought about it. So I don't THINK we'll have a 4th, but I guess it's not necessarily off of the table? In the future quite a ways. But then I don't want to have a straggler while these 3 are so close.
H always said he wanted 3, and I said 2. But then we had Owen and had such struggles with sleep, among other things, and H said 2 would be ok, but now that we're nearing 2 and he's sleeping soooo much better, I'm entertaining the idea of 3.
I always knew I wanted kids, but never was "omg I want to be a mommy", but now that I am I really love it. I think when we'll reassess when we get to this point with number 2.
Post by formerlyllizzyb on Feb 3, 2014 7:22:07 GMT -5
Besides the other things I mentioned, the longer we're parents, the more it's clear to me that we don't do chaos or the first year very well. If all goes well (fertility speaking) we will have a 3-3.5 yr gap btwn Graham and a sibling. That will most likely work out better for us then a 2u2 scenario. I have a hard time wrapping my brain around waiting another 3 yrs and then going through the newborn/baby days for a third time. But I have an even harder time envisioning having 4 or 5 yr old Graham, an 18 monther, and a newborn. Eek. We like calm at our house, lol.
But I sure would love to have three kids seated around my dining room table in a couple of decades.
If career and money weren't issues, I'd want 3 or 4, but for lots of reasons, we're done at 2. I still hope maybe we can consider adoption at some point.