my parents paid for 50% through my masters degrees. I had various scholarships and grants, what was covered by that went on loans and some things were out of pocket so when I started paying back my loans, my mom paid 50% until a mutually agreed upon halfway point and I took it from there. I'm very grateful.
My parents told me from a very young age I was on my own at 18. They paid for nothing. I was lucky enough to earn a full academic scholarship for undergrad, and my FI paid for my MS (though I did earn the highest scholarship offered to offset this cost). I hope to pay for the education of my own child/ren, but I'd also like to pay it forward in a larger way someday.
My parents did what they could to help, which basically entailed taking out the full amount that was offered to them my first year as a parent loan. The subsequent three years I didn't qualify for any more parent loans (because I made "too much")and the rest was paid for by scholarships and student loans on my end.
I worked nearly 40 hours a week all through college and am still paying off my loans now. I graduated a semester early, which saved me some money, but I also did a May term study abroad which sort of equaled the cost of that saved semester of tuition. I think I graduated with just under $20,000 in loans and my parents took something like $9,000? I lived in the dorm my freshman year, and at home the remaining years.
I went to college about 30 min away from home, lived there the first 2 years (came home every weekend to work part time), then commuted the last 2 years (worked part time as well). My parents paid for everything except for books. I was really lucky.
My parents paid, but they had stipulations - $X per year or less, within 2 hours driving distance from home. They offered me far more to live at home and go to community college for 2 years then transfer.
I'm fascinated by this. Maybe it's just because I'm from a blended family, and my mom/stepdad had 4 kids between them when they got marries, but living at home was NOT an option. My mom was a little upset that I went as far away as I did, but she did expect me to go away somewhere. Even if I'd gone to the state university 15 minutes down the street, I would have been expected to live in the dorm.
When I was applying to law schools, my dad suggested I go to the one closest to my mom's house, live with her, and commute. I couldn't tell my dad that my mom was perfectly happy having all her kids out of the house and had zero interest in any birdies returning to the nest.
To be honest, I feel like living in a dorm/on campus/with other students/in close proximity to your classes and activities is a great part of the college experience. So even if my kids COULD commute to school, and even though it would cost more, I'd encourage them to live on campus for at least the first year or two.
You can treat college like a job, and just go back and forth to class, but it kind of misses a lot of what college offers and that would be a very different experience. I spent a LOT of time on campus in the late night/early morning hours. /radio nerd
I'm fascinated by this. Maybe it's just because I'm from a blended family, and my mom/stepdad had 4 kids between them when they got marries, but living at home was NOT an option. My mom was a little upset that I went as far away as I did, but she did expect me to go away somewhere. Even if I'd gone to the state university 15 minutes down the street, I would have been expected to live in the dorm.Â
When I was applying to law schools, my dad suggested I go to the one closest to my mom's house, live with her, and commute. I couldn't tell my dad that my mom was perfectly happy having all her kids out of the house and had zero interest in any birdies returning to the nest.Â
I'm an only child and my parents, mom especially, had difficulty cutting the cord.
Ah. I have 3 other siblings with that part of the blended family. Because my younger sister was living with her mom out of state, I was the last to leave home. It was the first time in my parents' married life they'd had the house to themselves. To say they enjoyed it would be the understatement of the year.
Between being a single mom for years and then being part of a big blended family, I'm pretty my mom had cut the cord by the time I was 10. LOL.
My parents paid, but they had stipulations - $X per year or less, within 2 hours driving distance from home. They offered me far more to live at home and go to community college for 2 years then transfer.
I'm fascinated by this. Maybe it's just because I'm from a blended family, and my mom/stepdad had 4 kids between them when they got marries, but living at home was NOT an option. My mom was a little upset that I went as far away as I did, but she did expect me to go away somewhere. Even if I'd gone to the state university 15 minutes down the street, I would have been expected to live in the dorm.
When I was applying to law schools, my dad suggested I go to the one closest to my mom's house, live with her, and commute. I couldn't tell my dad that my mom was perfectly happy having all her kids out of the house and had zero interest in any birdies returning to the nest.
Most of the students at my hometown are from that town and live at home. And many of them continue to live at home until they get married. And even when I was away at (a large, public) college I, knew a bunch of students who lived at home and commuted. So students living at home and commuting is not unheard of. And most of the parents are ok with it. It's just what's done there. I imagine it happens this a lot of small middle class towns where supporting two households is not an option, but paying for the local college may be within reach. Or at the very least, the students who still have to work to pay their own way are at least not also working to pay rent.
However, I agree with msmerymac that living on your own at some point during the college years is beneficial. Going away to school was a great experience, and if I had kids, I would want them to live away from home. Not because I wanted the place to myself, lol, but because I would want them to have that experience.
I'm glad I did not live in a dorm. I had no desire to live in close proximity to others. I worked my ass off so I could live on my own, with no roommate.unless you count my "live in boyfriend" who didn't pay a dime in rent.
msmerymac I do feel like living on campus is an important part of the experience. I wonder how my university experience would have differed had I lived on campus.
I grew up in a university town, so when I started university I just kept living at home and I was mostly attending classes with the same people I had attended high school. Most of my friends lived at home while going to school. It made for an easy transition, because I continued working the same job I had been working at in high school. But, yeah, I didn't really get to experience the whole "community" aspect of school.
Now I want to ask my mom what she would have said if I'd asked to live at home. I shall report back!
I was going to ask you about this, actually - what would have happened if you had asked to live at home. Then I rambled on about my thing and forgot. lol.
Now I want to ask my mom what she would have said if I'd asked to live at home. I shall report back!
I was going to ask you about this, actually - what would have happened if you had asked to live at home. Then I rambled on about my thing and forgot. lol.
I emailed my mom. She's probably just now getting to work to see it. I shall update you!
Poor mamalasagna is going to think this is a trick question.
I went to juco on a full athletic scholarship, then transferred to a university on partial athletic scholarship (covered tuition but not room and board, etc.). My parents paid the balance, and paid for my tuition and living expenses for my 5th year. I worked the entire time and contributed what I could but my schedule didn't really allow me to take on a lot of hours, so I basically worked to pay for my gas and food. As crazy as my parents are, I will be forever grateful that they allowed me to get my degree without taking out student loans. They were not wealthy by any means, but lived very frugally and put money away as they were able.
We never really discussed it, except for them telling me that I'd need to take out loans. I think it was always understood that they'd help where they could, but since we didn't have a lot of money and since I'm the oldest of three kids, most of the responsibility would go to me.
I got a few scholarship offers, and the most significant one was a local commuter school that offered me a half-tuition scholarship. I felt like it was too good an offer to pass up, and since I didn't have any strong feelings toward any other schools I decided to at least try it for a year and then transfer if I was unhappy. I became involved in clubs and sports right away, got an on-campus job, and met MH.
The scholarship paid half my tuition, and I made up the rest with loans. Three out of four years I got a leadership position in the school that reimbursed nearly all of my tuition at the end of each school year, so I had about $10K in loans to pay back after graduation (my dad encouraged me to put most of the reimbursement checks into savings and just depend on the loans - not sure how I feel about that today, but the loans are gone so it's moot).
I worked for my spending money, but sometimes my parents would give me money for books, food, or bus fare. In sophomore year they gave me a clunker car - they paid for my insurance and gave me a gas credit card that they paid for, and did it for about a year after graduation until I bought myself another used car and passed the clunker to my brother. They gave me a cash gift at graduation, and paid for my cell phone until I was 28. I lived at home until I was 23, then I got an apartment for a few years until we got engaged and I moved in with MH.
My sister went to a private school for a couple of semesters and flunked because of partying, then attended my same commuter school for a semester before dropping out and working PT jobs for a few years before going to beauty school. She's 27 and still lives at home, and she helps pay the loans but I think my parents paid for a lot of it too, and they were pissed that she wasted her time/their money. My brother went to a Jesuit college and they took out a second mortgage to help him. He's 24 and lives at home as well, but he started working right away.
MH and I have talked about it, and I think we're in agreement that we'll help our kids with college where we can but we're not planning to pay for all of it. They can get loans or work, and go to a commuter/community college if necessary. The public schools in our neighborhood seem pretty good so we're not planning to send them to private school - not a private grammar school, at least. I'd rather pay for high school than grammar school. But we won't have kids in grade school for at least 5-6 years, so we may be in a position to move by then if the neighborhood schools aren't good.
Post by shellbear09 on Mar 5, 2014 10:29:30 GMT -5
My parents didn't pay for any of it. I qualified for pell grants that paid for the majority. I ended up with a small 5k loan, that I paid off in the grace period when I graduated. I lived at home and had to commute to the university. I worked 30-40 hours a week the whole time. Then a few years later I went into a certificate program that I paid for myself.
Post by UnderProtest on Mar 5, 2014 10:41:52 GMT -5
I had a small scholarship and a set amount of money from my grandmother. Otherwise, my parents paid for my undergrad. Freshman and sophomore years I lived in the dorm and the rest off campus, for which they gave me a set amount of money per month for rent, utilities, food and gas. I worked during breaks my freshman year (near their house) and started working part time at school starting sophomore year. Funny enough, my brother and I were both getting in state tuition (paid for by my married parents) in two different states at the same time. My brother went to an expensive private college his first year and burned through his allotment from Grandma part way through that year. Mine lasted well into my sophomore year. I think this is how I managed to convince my dad to still pay my rent the last semester of my senior year even though I moved to another city for a well-paid internship.
My parents always told me they would pay for college and that I had to go. First semester, they paid. Second semester, "Woops, no money! You still have to go!"
H actually wound up paying for 2 more semesters before I took a "break." lol I still haven't gone back 10 years later.
I haven't read the whole thread but why didn't you take out loans. I don't get not finishing b/c no one would pay for it.
Oh I didn't mean that I quit because no one would pay. I got a job and decided I'd take a break and just never went back. I didn't even really know what I wanted to do. I was taking my Gen Ed requirements and undecided if I wanted to go into childhood development or interior design. I'm in neither now.
I never expected my parents to pay for any of my college, but they paid for one semester. At the time my relationship was not the best with my parents but they were willing and could very easily afford to pay for 4 years at any school. 1st generation Asian parents = very controlling so I needed to make myself financially independent if I wanted freedom. So I did some budgeting and decided to transferred to a cheaper (but still out of state) state school. Between working 30 hours a week and loans, I was able to pay for gas, food, rent, books and part of tuition that loans didn't cover.
To me, that was the best decision I have ever made for myself. I learned to grow up and become financially independent while juggling a part time job (full time during last 2 years) and full time school. I learned how to budget and decided early on that I didn't want to live paycheck to paycheck after taking a semester off of school. It also helped me focus more in school because it was my money that was paying for the grades I was getting. As a result, I now have a great relationship with my parents.
H's story was kind of similar. His parents paid for the first year, he screwed around (frat guy), was suspended from school for a semester for poor grades...a 0.6 gpa haha, then went back and I forget if his parents refused to pay or what...but I told him we didn't need them to help and that we could do it on our own. So he went back and got his shit together with my help and graduated with a 3.3 gpa.
My parents insisted on college for my brother and me the entire time growing up. Since I had excellent grades while being a grade ahead, school activities and was hearing impaired, I also got fed the line that I 'deserved' to go to whatever school I wanted. They were able to cover 2 semesters at community college for my brother, then declared bankruptcy when I was a senior in high school. College had been drilled into me so hard that I still applied to NYU early decision, and it took until the summer orientation to really see that I couldn't swing it. UG with study abroad cost me about 20K at our local state school living at home (and taking out loans also to cover parents' bills), then I really needed grad school, which was another 30K, especially since I needed loans to cover expenses while student teaching for 16wks and unable to work. Since I don't have a PhD/terminal degree with the recent degree inflation, I've basically hit the ceiling working for a university. Looking back, I see I should have gotten a 2yr degree (if that), and taken the CSEA exam; I'd be doing basically the same level of admin work and making more with a more guaranteed retirement.
I paid for all of it, though my grandma paid for me to stay in the dorms the summer after my freshman year so I wouldn't have to move home between semesters. I'm the oldest of 4 & my dad owns his own business, so there was never an offer or expectation that they would pay for anything. They did let me do laundry at home whenever I wanted, raid the pantry, & dad usually slipped a $20 & a few beers into my laundry bag when he dropped me off.
I worked about 35 hrs/wk through school & ended up with SLs for the rest; tried for scholarships but didn't get any. I did get screwed by FAFSA & I would've had some amazing grants if my dad worked for someone else. On paper he had a high income but never took a paycheck, everything went back into the company.
ILs paid for all of DH's expenses 1st year, then gave him small occasional amounts for food or tuition the other 3 years. I can't imagine being able to pay for a full undergrad but 1 year is more realistic. It was a lot of stress as an 18 year old trying to balance school FT, a FT job, and figure out how to pay the bills without cc debt & I'd like my kids to have at least a year to settle in and focus on school.
Post by lasagnasshole on Mar 5, 2014 12:35:08 GMT -5
Well, mamalasagna swears I could have lived at home if that's what I really wanted but that it wasn't an issue since it wasn't in my DNA. I am skeptical. LOL.
Well, mamalasagna swears I could have lived at home if that's what I really wanted but that it wasn't an issue since it wasn't in my DNA. I am skeptical. LOL.
Here's how I'm guessing our moms differ - my mom wanted me to move back in after I was done with college. I moved in with DH, then-FI and she was horrified. Even now, if DH and I divorced, or he died and I sold my house, my parents would let me live with them.
Well, mamalasagna swears I could have lived at home if that's what I really wanted but that it wasn't an issue since it wasn't in my DNA. I am skeptical. LOL.
Here's how I'm guessing our moms differ - my mom wanted me to move back in after I was done with college. I moved in with DH, then-FI and she was horrified. Even now, if DH and I divorced, or he died and I sold my house, my parents would let me live with them.
When pressed, Mom did admit they would have encouraged me to live in the dorm.
When we were feeling despondent about jobs, I half-jokingly suggested we would move back to Texas and live with my parents for 6 months while we looked for jobs. Mom did NOT find that funny.
My parents paid. It never even occurred to me that they wouldn't pay and that I might have to work or something to pay for college. I didn't do stuff like Spring Break trips and ski trips and all that though because I didn't hang with a set who did that stuff so it never occurred to me, and my spending money came from a monthly allowance along with other money I got from family.
This is true for me as well. I however did not do well my first semester. I am lucky they allowed me to continue. My DH and I plan to pay for our kids to go to a in state school (or give them that amount to go somewhere else.)
My parents expected that I would go to college and they paid my tuition and living expenses for my undergrad. There were definite strings to the money, such as their input on what school I would attend, but I was incredibly fortunate to have their help. Although I will probably never admit it to them, they were probably right to tell me I couldn't go to one of the schools that accepted me. It wouldn't have been the right environment.
I didn't spend a lot of money on extras during college. As part of their agreement to pay, I had to submit a budget to my parents twice a year, and they wrote me a check based on that. Adding categories for spring break or going to the bar wasn't going to fly =)
I paid for my own college. I had military money, grants and a small scholarship. I did take a small loan the last semester but it is paid off. I worked full time and paid for my own apartment, utilities, phone, car, gas...well everything.
I would love to help my kids out so they can do well and enjoy the college experience. I would have appreciated the help.
My parents were very poor. It was a blessing in disguise for me which 1. Led to pretty good financial aid and 2. Forced me to grow up, work while in school and buck up.
I graduated with $40k in SLs, but paid a good bit while in school myself.