Has your heart ever felt broken?

[sherbanator]

Have you ever felt heart broken over a relationship? I know it sounds cliché but even though I was married before I had never felt truly heart broken over a guy. I don't think I realized how much it actually physically hurts.

This is a weird question. I had no idea how to phrase it.

[Saint Monica]

Yes.

((sherbanator))

[Captain Serious]

Yes, after I broke up with my boyfriend if 8 years. I had thought we were going to get married. We were both still in love when we broke up, but I am a Christian and wanted to raise my kids in the religion and he is an atheist of Jewish heritage, and would only consent to either of those two belief systems (preferably no religious upbringing) for his children. I walked away when it became completely clear we would never find a compromise, but was still madly in live with him.

I agree with the others, unfortunately only time helps. Distraction can keep you from thinking about it, but even when you are busy, the ache is there. I remember praying for time to move faster. It does get better, though. That, I promise. Hang in there.

[Jalapeñomel]

Of course.


((Hugs)))

[Deleted]

yes ((hugs))

[pantsoffdanceoff]

Yes, I remember the extreme physical pain and being surprised that my teeth hurt. I agree with the PPs, the only thing that I have really found that has made it better is time.

[Deleted]

Yes. It hurt so bad it made me feel physically sick. I felt like I was going to throw up constantly. Luckily I got over it with time. Hugs to you.

[loskadoodle]

Yes and unfortunately it took a VERY log time to get over. Every time I saw him, those feelings came rushing back. Even after I was dating my now dh. But eventually I realized that it was for the best. I haven't seen him in a couple years but we are friends on FB and when stuff from him pops up, I still get a sort of sinking feeling in my stomach. But I have a great life and great dh now, so everything works out! Thinking of you though. It's so so hard when you are first going through it.

[sherbanator]

((kooshball)) you have a pm

[Muddled]

Heartbreak is the suck.
It will get easier eventually.

Hugs to both of you.

[sherbanator]

I think I would have answered yes to this question because of how I felt when ex husband cheated on me but this does not compare. I only thought I felt heart break but it was nothing like the agony I am in and will probably always feel on some level.

This really can't be my life.

[Deleted]

Yes. (hugs)

[cc]

Yes, when my first serious boyfriend and I broke up a year after he went away to college. (I am a year younger than him so I will still in high school) It hurt so much and took me a long time to get over it.

(((hugs)))

[TrickyBob]

Yes.

[no0b]

Yup. My first serious boyfriend. I felt sick, went batshit crazy and made a complete and utter fool out of myself. It took a long time. Now I just look back and think of how silly I was <-- It takes time to get to this point

[kayakjenn]

It happened the first time when my first husband left me- the reaction was so physical and painful, I was shocked at how much my body shut down and wouldn't function properly.

I had it happen again, although a little belatedly, when my beloved cat died of cancer. It was beyond mourning, I was truly broken.

I got a very good piece of advice during that first time to be especially careful driving because your reflexes are shot and you no longer respond the same when you're going through this.

[LeggsBenedict]

not from a relationship, but yes, I have felt heart broken. it hurts and it sucks and you feel like your heart is just going to quit on you. I'm sorry.

[Deleted]

Yes, but it was the worst relationship ever. I'm pretty sure my emotions were more intense because of drug use and being in an overall bad place in life.

[cuddlyevil]

Yep. It sucked completely and the damage was pervasive.

[toepick]

When my ex-husband moved out, I was so stressed and an emotional wreck that I got my very first UTI. I truly believe that emotional pain can cause physical pain.

[bbaggins]

Yes. And it sucks. And can literally take your breath away and overcome you without warning. I'm sorry

[shoeless]

Yes, it sounds silly since I was in love with an idea, not a person, but when I learned I couldn't have genetic children. That broke my heart. I've felt heart break before from boyfriends but nothing has compared to this. ((kooshball)) ((sherbanator))

[snorky]

Yes. My stbxh told me he was filing for divorce about three months ago. We've been together for ten years, have a three year old together and were going to start trying for no. 2 at the end of the year. I had recently left all my friends and family to move across the country with him. My body shut down for about two weeks- I had constant panic attacks, I couldn't sleep, I couldn't eat, I couldn't even drink (like, the liquid felt too cold and it hurt my entire body). I lost 15 pounds, sprouted up three grey hairs (my firsts), and I swear I could feel my heart just shriveling up or exploding, depending on the time of day.

I am still a mess, but therapy and antidepressants are helping. My grandfather also died a couple of weeks ago, so I was able to see all of my family at the funeral and remembered what a great man he was. It was then that I realized that I needed to give up hope on my h- he's just not good enough. So, definitely lean on your friends and family in this situation.

Another poster had a great point about driving- I totally screwed up my bumper when I swerved to avoid an oncoming car about a week after h moved out. Thankfully, my dd wasn't with me and the car is still completely functional, but it is embarrassing and I just can't afford to fix it at the moment.

[livinitup]

Yes. The level of and duration of physical pain was quite real. It was also quite shocking because the end of the relationship was something I wanted very much. But the heartache - jesus.

I can vividly remember an afternoon where I had to leave my desk because I was so physically distraught. I was trying SO HARD to hold it together but my emotions overwhelmed me. I walked out of the building, across a deserted parking lot and BAWLED my eyes out - dry heaving, crying and everything. I had to sit quietly under a tree for a while before I could put it together to return to work.  

It really shocked me. But I did recover. And I am a better person for the experience. I wouldn't wish it on anyone and I wouldn't wish it away either.

[isabel]

Yes. DH and I broke up for a brief period due to a difference in religious beliefs. It was truly one of the most awful feelings I've ever had. We talked and have kind of met in the middle since then and are very happy. That was a pretty serious rough patch though.

[papie]

I don't think so. I mean, did it feel that way for a few days? Sure but then I got up and moved on pretty quick.

[ladyk]

About 3 months into my (then) husband's deployment. I had 2 friends lose their husband and fiance (respectively) within the same week and in the same area he was deployed to. There was a chopper crash at the FOB and I hadn't heard anything so I was panicked. I collaspsed in complete grief and fear and I couldn't breathe. I felt like my world had exploded.

I wasn't even in that state of grief when we decided to divorce. I think because it was a long drawn out process.

[starburst604]

Yes, and for a long time it felt like it would never get better, but with time it did. It will get better for you too, I promise. I really did emerge from it a much better version of myself.

[bonquiqui]

Yes, and i understand exactly how you feel. Before left me, i didn't think it was possible to actually feel a broken heart, but it is.

[Eagles]

Yes. I dated a guy for more than two years, and we lived together for almost a year, and he told me he didn't love me and was ending things two days after my favorite aunt passed away. I was a mess. I couldn't eat and lost about 25 pounds. I was nauseated all the time, I couldn't sleep, my bones ached. It was like having the worst flu ever for six weeks and I felt like a zombie. It was right at the holidays, too. One day, I found out that he had been cheating on me, and I sat down and realized that I was in love with a person who didn't exist, and that really helped me to get it together and move on, but fuck, it was agony getting to that point. Zoloft and Valium certainly helped.

Be kind to yourself.