Post by themoneytree on Jul 9, 2014 19:01:50 GMT -5
Team you. I would be unbelievably hurt too. Fuck them all. I'm so sorry. : (
Are you in touch with these 'friends' currently? I can't imagine not saying something but I think it's one of these situations where you are damned if you do and damned if you don't. They suck.
You poor thing. I was thinking about you the other day and wondering how you were because I haven't seen you post in a while. I would 100% feel the same way as you - totally normal. I'm so sorry that you are hurting. Lots of creepy internet hugs to you.
Sorry, I would be hurt too. I think it would be hard to stay friends with them while you are still healing. Maybe in the future it might not bother you. Until then, put yourself out there and make new friends. Don't let your divorce define you. Only you get to do that!!
Post by trixiedicksnatch on Jul 9, 2014 19:14:43 GMT -5
I am not sure I know you but I'm really sorry.
They can all eat a big ol bag of dicks. It's obvious lots of people care about you so just try to focus on that. And if that's not working rage punch pillows.
I am so angry for you, and I wish we lived closer so I could show you that you aren't alone (wait, did that sound creepy? I didn't mean it that way.). Lots if hugs I you, you are awesome and deserve so much better than the hand you've been dealt.
Bon, you're awesome. I agree with toledo that these are not friends in the true sense of the word. You know the saying about lying down with dogs and getting fleas? The people who would attend this wedding are flea-ridden.
Post by karmasabiotch on Jul 9, 2014 19:32:29 GMT -5
I'm sorry. You are the clear winner in this situation, it just doesn't feel like that right now. You will have a life that so amazing that you just can't quite picture it yet.
You're not crazy. You're not a loser. Anyone who has any kind of feelings would be hurt in your situation.
As far as your friends...you're not making them choose. Unfortunately (for them and for you), they have already chosen. You have every right to tell them how hurt you are by their actions and their decision, and then move on. The bonus of being an adult is that you can choose to only include people in your life who YOU want to share your life with. You don't need a million friends, you need a couple of good ones. You're not obligated to keep anyone in your life who has hurt you or even disappointed you. In your shoes, I'd try to talk to your BFF and see her side of the story before totally backing out of that friendship.
You mean a LOT to a lot of people on ML. Even though you've never met many/most/any of them, that doesn't necessarily make them any less of a friend to you.
Wow, they suck. Im really sorry, and I agree with the comments that say you deserve to keep only the true friends. Those are not the ones attending this bullshit wedding.
They are not true friends. I am so sorry that you are hurting. I just think that in the long run you are so much better off, even if you can't see that now which I get. But you are. If the person you are with does not realize what an amazing woman he has in front of him, then honestly, he doesn't deserve you.
If ever there was a need for a girls weekend, this is it. I would be game!
First - I'm so sorry Bon. Your reaction is normal; believe. But that doesn't make it hurt less, I know.
Second - your piece of shit ex is making a power play. I'm sure of that. I am also sure that this will backfire eventually. Besides the BFF's H being in the wedding, I wonder how many of your mutual friends will actually attend.
Third - speaking of the BFF, I would tell her how hurt you are. I'm side-eyeing her for not coming to you first, but regardless, I would have to tell her how I feel. For this point, I have a story:
My BFF left her H. She actually moved across states and lived with me for a few months. There was no cheating, but within a month of moving, her ex was dating someone. They got engaged 4 months later. My H (at the time, lol) was good friends with her ex and we were invited to the wedding. I let her know immediately. We talked/hugged it out. She knew I wouldn't be attending if not for my H. I ended up play-by-playing the funnier aspects of the wedding (e.g., his trashy family) to her and she was cracking up.
Maybe not your style, and not exactly the same type of situation, but that's how we handled it and we're closer than ever, though I'm sure my own divorce "helped," lol.