Maybe for some kids, but not for David. He's extremely social and has always made friends easily but I'm talking more about maturity when I say social skills. He's still a little immature for his age, not to where he's not ready to start kindergarten but if he started at FOUR?? Helll no, there would be no rising to the occasion *for him*. It would have been a disaster.
This is my DS too, he does well socially in making friends and being able to handle things. However his maturity level still lacks sometimes. However at the same time I realize that even some of the older kids in his class lack maturity and starting kindergarten at 4 for us turning 5 with in the first 2.5 weeks wasn't the end of the world.
I don't think it would be the end of the world, either. And like previous posters mentioned, YOU know your kid better than anybody and my kid would not have done as well last year compared to this year (and I thank god he was born in November so I didn't have to make that decision). Luckyval's kid might totally be ready, as I'm sure your kid was, too. She's just asking for input and well, that's my opinion.
In my district there is no cut off. They take all kids until dec 31st. My nephew will be starting at 4 and turning 5 on Christmas eve. There is no red shirting here. I had an early feb birthday and always felt way older than my classmates since most were 17 at graduation.
The problem we had was having a 17 year old college student.
I was a Sophomore in college before I was 18. I was never 21 in college, and that kind of sucked, but it wasn't bad overall.
I would not do it. The cut off is the cut off for a reason. Even exceptional children usually have some aspect of development that is grade appropriate. One guy I went to high school with was a Junior in college before he graduated from high school. He still came to high school for soft things, music, PE, art, ect. He was jointly enrolled in high school and a very competitive university.
Post by meredithblake on Aug 28, 2014 11:16:16 GMT -5
Other posters have mentioned it briefly, but I think puberty becomes a big issue in later years. During my education classes, we often learned about the social interactions between students. It was often reiterated that boys who develop later may not fit in as well with peers. One of my teachers was old school and used the idea of a smaller boy getting pushed in a locker. It's probably more subtle these days, but I picture getting teased for being shorter or having a voice that hasn't changed.
Obviously, puberty doesn't occur at a set age, so the point could be invalid if a boy develops early for age. Even kids the same exact age could hit puberty at very different times. AND you hope teasing never occurs, but it's just something to think about.
Just for interest purposes- the teacher also pointed out that it may be easier for girls when they develop later, because they can fly under the radar and not receive negative attention from boys when they develop early.
I have never met anyone who regretted not starting their boy early. I spent a lot of time volunteering in my son's K classroom and there is a huge difference between almost 5 and almost 6, IMO.
Kindergarten is for learning how to be in school, how to get along, how to listen to someone who isn't their parent, how to deal when someone isn't focused on them specifically, and much more buying simple academics.
Not all teachers are great, of course, but a great K teacher will know how to keep kids of all levels engaged.
I would not discount your mom's opinion here. Presumably she knows him well too and is saying something worth listening to. Ultimately you make the call though.
I noticed the redshirting thing happening a lot only when the birthday is around the deadline. David's BFF at school had a July birthday (just turned 6) and his mom waited to start him this year. Honestly, I would have done the same with David due to his speech delay. I think it's understandable when the birthday is on the cusp, but that's just me. I feel like if there's a doubt about them being ready, now is the time to do it. Now, if you're doing it for a sport's advantage or something, then I think you're an asshole.
Post by dancingnancy on Aug 28, 2014 11:27:13 GMT -5
You know him best and you know what he is ready for. I missed the cut off by two weeks but my parents got me in. I struggled a bit in Kindergarten but eventually caught up and was never held back and it worked out fine for me. My daughter is a December baby and had she been born earlier and close to cut off, I don't think she would have been ready.
Finley is 5 and will turn 6 in November. She just started Kinder this year at the appropriate time per the school calendar. I don't know any 4 year olds in Kinder. The red shirts are 6 and will turn 7 this year (all boys in her class.)
I don't think that happens here. You would have to have a very good reason for having a 7 year old in kindergarten.
Yes. Kindergarten here is not compulsory, so if your kid doesn't start K when they're supposed to, they are automatically registered for 1st grade the next year.
I dont think red-shirting happens very often, honestly. Certainly not in most public school districts where paying for another year of daycare or preschool just wouldn't be a viable option for most parents. Perhaps in private schools, but even then, I really dont believe it's all that common.
Post by Shreddingbetty on Aug 28, 2014 11:32:51 GMT -5
My birthday is mid October and I started K at 4. I could read and I was tall and I think they put me in K not realizing I technically didn't make the cut off. I started my period at 11 and have been my adult height since 13 (5'11"). It was never a problem for me. I grew up in the Netherlands and so we can't even get a drivers license until 18 so that didn't matter anyway. I came to the US to go to college for a year sort of as a gap year. I was more mature than most of the freshmen . I could care less about drinking because I had been allowed some alcohol for a long time. It does depend on the kid and you will never be totally able to predict how they will do socially wether they are old enough or not. If he is that close to the cut off you can always try it. If it doesn't work you just have him repeat My niece was on the old side because she repeated K. She still didn't get her drivers license until 18.5 at the end of her senior year (she got her permit at 16 though). Not everyone gets their DL the day they turn 16 and our younger niece will not even be able to think about a DL at 16 if she doesn't keep her grades up. Honestly the thought of her driving a car at 16 scares me. She is a 15 y/o freshman but does not necessarily have a lot of common sense.
I haven't had to decide for myself, but my aunt has mentioned several times that she notices my cousin (who is 14 and a freshman now with a June 20 bday, one of the youngest boys in his class) started struggling socially around jr high being a full year younger than a lot of the other boys. He could read and write full sentences at 4 so they started K on time (and she is a K teacher), but she says they wish they would have waited sometimes seeing the big maturity/social differences once kids start hitting puberty.
Post by hopecounts on Aug 28, 2014 12:13:30 GMT -5
the other thing to consider is the type of thinking that is required starts to shift from rote memorization of words/letters/numbers to more critical thinking around 3rd grade. This is a developmental leap that occurs around 8/9. By sending him as a younger kid he may end up struggling when the concepts and expectations shift which could be very hard for him especially if he has always been a 'smart kid' My Mom taught 4th grade for 20 years and says it really started to show up around 3rd/4th who were late bdays and beginning to struggle. We were discussing this last week at MNO and one of the Mom's was talking about how her 20 year old brother regrets not being held back. He didn't hit his growth spurt until 17 and it made HS rough for him (hard to get dates/play sports/etc)
I would say really think about that choice and have your eyes wide open. My second eldest placed early in kindergarten early and now we are holding him back in second. Academically he is still above his peers, socially, a little too immature. My dad had advised against it and he was a primary school principal for 30 years and I didn't listen, I thought it was all about the brains and now I know differently.
I'm late to this, but since my daughter misses the cut off and we had her tested for early admission to k, i thought i'd give my thoughts. She is in 2nd grade now and doing well. There are several September bdays in her class, so she's not alone. She's at an independent private school, though, so I think this is pretty common there. Her bday is 9/29 and there's even one kid (a boy) younger than she is. On the other end of the spectrum, there are 2-3 kids 12-18 months older than she is because they repeated 1st or k, or they waited to start. Academically, she's more than fine. She's actually fine socially as well, though there are instances in which it's clear she's younger than the others. It's working for us because we're at a small school (12 kids in her class, and there's a focus on differentiated learning and no standardized testing). If she were going to our local public school and been thrust into a big class (she's an only and never went to daycare) we probably would have waited. The little boy in her class who is younger than she is cried almost every single day at drop off last year. I thought the teacher was a saint for how she dealt with both he and his Mom and finally towards the end of the year he was okay. That's just an example of how he was so clearly not socially ready.
All that to say, I feel like being older probably would have served my DD better later on in life, but I definitely don't regret our decision to start her at 4.
I should also add that he started early in a private school we switched him to public in second and it was there he could not keep up socially. Maybe there is a difference and if there is, my thought would be if you start him in private maybe it would be better to keep him in private. I never thought there would be that much of a difference between public and private but I guess there might be.
Finley is 5 and will turn 6 in November. She just started Kinder this year at the appropriate time per the school calendar. I don't know any 4 year olds in Kinder. The red shirts are 6 and will turn 7 this year (all boys in her class.)
I don't think that happens here. You would have to have a very good reason for having a 7 year old in kindergarten.
In Ontario school is mandatory at 6, but most kids that are 6 by the fall would be placed right into grade 1.
I have transitioned in kids with ASD for work who have missed JK/SK for intensive therapy programs, and our local boards are sticklers for year of birth even if we can make a good case for the benefits of trying out kindergarten first.
We had my daughter tested for early entrance into K and although she's very bright (says her mom!) they only take exceptional kindergarten students. And by exceptional, they meant that they were above average kindergarten standards even before kindergarten. She tested to be exceptional in reading, average in math and average in the last category I can't remember so she didn't go early.
I thought the whole "exceptional" policy was ridiculous at the time, but I understand that the reason for the cut off is mostly to control the number of kids who enter school each year. An average kindergartener would be OK but if they took everyone who tested at the average level it might really skew their numbers. I think they accept VERY few early kindergarteners with their exceptional rule.
Anyway, my daughter started 1st grade this year and ultimately it was a great decision. She's very bright but they are working with her at the level she's at. And there are plenty of her classmates who are also at her level.