If your kid used a pacifier after age two, come in

[Deleted]

My parents bribed us at age 3. We got a doll if we turned in our pacifier.

[fortmyersbride]

DS used his till 3.5, maybe? DD still has hers at almost 3. Starting at 2, they were only allowed in bed. We ended up slowing poking holes in the pacifier for DS (used a safety pin) until he could no longer suck them. Will probably do the same for DD in the next 6 mos if she doesn't give them up on her own.

[fortmyersbride]

Oh and DS did have a gap between his two front teeth and it slowing closed over about 6 mos after he quit the paci. A year later the gap was totally gone.

I'm all about pacifier enabling

[ilikedonuts]

We did just crib and car from about 18 months on except for the occasional time when I needed to quiet her (like the week after she turned 18 months when she used it like 24/7 at Disney). Then we went to the dentist at 2 years 2 months and the dentist looked in her mouth and immediately goes "ohhhhhhhhhhh she uses a pacifer doesn't she? I can tell by how her teeth are already moving because of it." Then she went on to talk about how their jaw also starts to form around using a pacifier and I freaked the F out.

So we left and went to the parking lot and threw the car binky in the trash can outside the dentist. She got one more night in her crib with the binky and then she unfortunately had to deal.

[ilikedonuts]

(and both my dentist's kids used pacifiers so she is def not anti-paci)

[badgergrl]

We only used it at bedtime past 2 or so, but when we tried to take it away she would stuck on her hands. Shortly before her 4th birthday she gave it to the "paci fairy" who brought her toys and treats. We let it be her choice and it worked out

[jr009j]

DD weaned from her paci at 2 and 4 months. She'd only been using it for sleep since 16 months-ish, but I noticed she was starting to want to linger in her crib more after naps so she could keep it. What we did was slowly reduce the number of pacis in her crib and read books about weaning off of it. But what really seemed to do it for use was having the dentist tell her she needed to stop using it. She "gave" her last remaining paci to the baby that day. Sleep adjustment wasn't too awful, though it was off for awhile.

We did have a backslide because her comfort object had been a stuffed zebra with a pacifier attached to it. (A wabanub imitator). She had never, ever used that pacifier. And she didn't use it until a month after we weaned her but once her sister was born, she started using it. We tried just to tell her to keep it out of her mouth, but we ended up having to cut the tip off the pacifier. Once the pacifier was broken, she wanted nothing to do with the zebra.

[ilikedonuts]

Oh and I really pushed the whole "X and Y's new baby sister and brother need the pacifiers now" I also made sure to have DD2 (born 2 months before we tossed DD1's pacifiers) use a different type of pacifier so there would not be temptation.

[water*drop]

DD gets hers in the crib and the car. We need to either poke holes or just go cold turkey, but I'm scared. I'm not scared of fits and crying, but after over 2 years of sleep deprivation that FINALLY resolved itself a couple of months ago, I am terrified of screwing up her sleep (read: my sleep). I have no advice, but I think my DD is a little bit older than yours? so I wanted to commiserate.

[undecidedowl]

Around a year we started limiting it to only sleep times. Daycare stopped giving it around 18 months. DS is 2.5 now and I keep thinking I should take it away but I don't feel like I have a great reason to. I was going to take it away before the baby is born so there wouldn't be any paci confusion but we did the big boy bed transition first and he did so well that I really don't feel like taking away a comfort object. FWIW, the dentist didn't say anything about it.

[undecidedowl]

Sept 20, 2014 21:49:30 GMT -5 @starry said:

Sept 20, 2014 21:48:35 GMT -5 water*drop said:

DD gets hers in the crib and the car. We need to either poke holes or just go cold turkey, but I'm scared. I'm not scared of fits and crying, but after over 2 years of sleep deprivation that FINALLY resolved itself a couple of months ago, I am terrified of screwing up her sleep (read: my sleep). I have no advice, but I think my DD is a little bit older than yours? so I wanted to commiserate.

YES. This is me exactly. DD has only been STTN for about 3 months. I can't go back all that shit. I can't sleep train her again! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

lol. Maybe this is my problem. When your kid doesn't STTN for two years, you'll give them just about anything to make it happen and keep happening. Worth it.

[badtzmaru22]

We got rid of the paci around age two. I was also afraid of her switching to sucking on her thumb or finger that we obv couldn't take away. My sister sucked her finger until she was like 12 or something ridiculous, and I did NOT want DD to end up like that. Anyway, we did the paci fairy thing, and it was a lot easier than I expected.

After that, she'd ask where her pacis went, and in the most pitiful yet stoic voice say, "paci fairy take them away." And it about broke my heart. DH was the one really pushing to get rid of it. She was down to nighttime only, and he wanted it gone before new baby arrived. Sometimes she does try to suck on DS's paci now though, but she makes ornery face bc she knows she's not allowed.

Good luck!!

[Brie]

On the medical end of things, we just had C's 2 year old dentist visit and he was very happy we'd weaned off since his last visit in the spring. Basically C is genetically doomed to braces anyway and already has a slight overbite but he felt extended pacifier use could have made it more severe and harder to correct later.

Anyway, the pedi dentist we see is young and seems fairly with it and I trust him to not be concerned about things that are archaic or whatever.

I will shut up about the rest per your last paragraph, ha.

[tealblue]

We actually hid Ds's paci this week at 27 months. He only used it at home for naps and bedtime and occasionally for teeth- f'ing canines!. He didn't use it at all at daycare since he was 18 months so I knew he could sleep without it. Tonight was the first time he didn't ask about it at bedtime. He was a super shitty infant sleeper and he has slept fine since we took it away. Original plan was to transition to a toddler bed and give up the pacis at the same time but DH just hid the pacis one night and all was well. It was shockingly uneventful. He has asked for pacis most nights this week and I say no pacis and I can see him try to cry but then he is totally fine.

[robot]

We were in a similar boat - it was around 2 that I limited it to crib only. I didn't fully wean her until over 3, does that make you feel better? At 3, the dentist said it was time. Her teeth were being affected. I think her teeth improved again after a few months without it though. Anyways...

We did the slow method: Poke a hole. Wait a couple days. Poke a few more holes. Wait a few more days. Cut a tiny bit of the tip off. Wait a few more days. Etc... she was a hard core addict, but at some point after the tip being cut, she was looking at them funny, and I said, oh it's broken? Well, you are getting old for one. Come to think of it, I think I started planting the seed of her getting too old before I even started. Just nicely and casually. ha. Anyways, I said, oh it's broken, do you want me to throw it away? And she said yes. I was shocked. I just hid them, thinking it would never work. But, she did okay, and never got the pacis back after that. The only thing bad is that it took her a) longer to fall asleep without the paci, and b) seemed to make napping less likely, although at 3, I think nap was becoming less of a need anyways. Overall though, it was a success.

I do not think cold turkey would have worked well with my kid's personality. She would have been PISSED. She needed to feel like she had some role in the decision. Which is another reason I waited until she was 3. But, that would be kid dependent potentially.

[Deleted]

We just took DD's away a week or so ago. She is 2yr5m

She already was only "supposed" to use it for sleep but often got in the car and occasionally around the house.

I started talking about "big girls don't use pacis" a few days before.

My biggest reason for being scared to take it away was a friend's kid stopped napping without it. Well she started refusing naps for a few days so I decided to try it since I knew when she skips naps she's really tired at bedtime and would go down easier without it and if she's not napping anyway then why not.

So I just took away cold turkey one night. Besides talking about it occasionally before that.

She slept! She Cried a bit (more like whining) but it wasn't nearly as bad as I expected. It took a few days of whining and asking for it with me reminding her she was a big girl.

Oh I also bribed her. I bribed her with ice cream for naps and pancakes for breakfast if she slept haha

I will say- I tried to take it away at 2yrs old and the first night was horrible and I gave in- but I didn't prep well, I kind of just took it away.

You could wait- our dentist said as long as it's gone by 4 (for night time only!) then it's fine. Except in our case- haha DD has a narrow palate and quite a big overbite so she actually told us to take it away before 2 but it took me a while

[lilac05]

Pacifiers not only affect tooth placement, but the shape of the vault of the mouth and placement of the tongue at rest, all of which can affect speech production. It also often limits how much a child says, since they're sucking on a pacifier instead of practicing new words. (Doesn't mean they don't KNOW those words, just that they don't use them as often.) From an SLP point of view, they should be avoided or limited ASAP.

That said, I'm a mom, too, and have a 13.5 month old who sleeps with a paci and occasionally gets it in the car (mostly when I want him to sleep). I plan to take it away from him next month after vacation, but........we'll see!

As with any parenting decisions, you just have to decide what works best for you & your child. Sometimes parenting is just about fighting today's fire...and weaning from a paci gets low priority. Consider the risks & benefits, decide your plan of action (or inaction), and be confident you made the best decision for you & your LO.

[Deleted]

Sept 21, 2014 5:08:56 GMT -5 @starry said:

Plus side not worried about language development. She has oodles of words and complex sentences. The messed up teeth bother me. We will make a dentist appointment for her soon.

My DD also is a big talker- huge vocabulary and can have full conversations. My mil is an SLP and is amazed at her speech and also never had an issue with pacis..

The teeth thing wasn't necessarily caused by her paci as my H has a narrow palate (sp?) as well but the paci definitely isn't helping. The good news is that it should partially correct itself now that she's paci free but she'll need braces eventually anyway due to overcrowding

[Willis Jackson]

My nephew sent his to Santa so he could give them to babies.

[bunnymendelbaum]

My DD1 was always an amazing sleeper. Then at 2, my mom guilted us into taking away the paci cold turkey. She is 4 now and just getting back to being a good sleeper again.

My DD2 can take her paci to college. IDGAF.

[vintageme]

We used it until a few weeks before she turned 4. I kept wanting to drop it but she would turn to her thumb instead (her dentist agreed with me picking pacifier over thumb!). After limiting to the bed (and car rides where sleep was expected and plane trips), we went cold turkey. She didn't GAF about giving them to new babies at the hospital or whatever, so we just "accidentally" lost them. There was a slight sleep regression in that we needed to stay with her until almost entirely asleep as opposed to letting her settle on her own. It took about 2 weeks to return to normal?

I found a hidden stash of them a few weeks later and she saw them in the trash and just said "look! Passes!" and went about her day, so she seems over it.

Idk, if I had to do it again, I'd probably do the exact same thing. Sometimes a "relaxing suck" in bed was all that calmed her down during her asshole three year old moments.

[barefootcontessa]

first, do not feel sensitive about it.  every child is different and it is not a reflection of your parenting skills.  second, I have had multiple pedi dentists tell me not to worry about pacifier use.  so with that ... 

I would start as you planned and tell her she gets to have her paci when she sleeps.  this is what I do with my older paci users ... it helps them sleep and sleep is obviously very important for their wellbeing. 

[Deleted]

J still has his. We limited to crib and car only around 18mos or so. I know I should get rid of it but I feel like I am constantly having to do some major parenting thing that will disrupt my temporary sense of calm and or diminish what little sleep i get lol.

Recently it has been potty training j, weaning the girls off the swaddle, and getting the girls to sleep in the crib rather than the rnp. So i absolutely hear you on not wanting to disrupt her sttn. Especially since j was an awful sleeper and once they are finally sleeping you don't want to mess with it!!!

Our pedi dentist said she wants the Paci gone by age 4! I feel like there are a wide variety of opinions on this. That said, I will tackle this in the next few months. I may cut the tip for a while or just go cold turkey. I do plan to buy a small toy to replace it. But damn, I'll die if I lose my one good sleeper!

[Deleted]

Sept 21, 2014 5:49:33 GMT -5 Willis Jackson said:

My nephew sent his to Santa so he could give them to babies.

I was thinking of doing something like this since the timing would work out.

[vmars]

Our pedi told us there's a window to take it away between 12-14 months then you are stuck with it until 3 lol. A CWer said her daughter had a paci until 3 and only gave it up after her favorite paci went missing and when she found it wedged between the crib and the wall she did not like the taste any more and gave it up herself.

[ringstrue]

There isn't a huge benefit to weaning her now. The teeth and speech thing is more a concern after 3.

I would get her the Ortho pacis with the older kid stage which allows the nipple part to sit better over teeth. Baby teeth will "float" a bit as they come in anyway so don't be concerned about super great alignment right now.

IMO it's good to wait until you see her transitioning away and then start to wean her away. I think DD got to a point where she'd use it but only to fall asleep or only when she was really upset. And then only for a minute. The rest of the time she's just chew it like it was a piece of gum, lol.

We did the "snip the tip" method, where all pacis get the end snipped off, then a week or two later, a bit more comes off, and so on until the paci isn't really useable or comforting. I liked this method because it wasn't me making a deal or making up stories, just her pacis becoming not appealing.

[Deleted]

Since 2 binkies been for bedtime only. This year at XMAS time he is leaving his binkies for the " binkie fairy" will come & leave a big boy toy in exchange for his binkies.

[zarapipe]

We took hers the weekend of the 3rd bday, after her party. We are hateful.

A few months before we tried to contain it to bed for the most part.

We got the book the paci fairy, she mostly understood it.

We also decorated a box, put all of the pacis in it and a gave it to a friend with a baby so the baby couls use her pacis.

It was a rough week I won't lie. Naps were half nonexistent anyway but she dropped them completely after this. She was fussy and bed time was a lot of crying for a while.

She was destined for braces anyway, so whatever. Her speach did explode after we took her paci.

[readyin07]

I want to cry reading this lol. I can't do it. DS2 turned 3 2 weeks ago and he still LOVES his paci. It is a must for sleep and if he is upset he will request it also. He really has to have his nap or I will DIE. He is extremely verbal, but I do worry for his teeth although....

DS1 also kept his until he was sometime over 3. I just feel like overall he was less attached than DS2. By that point DS2 was here and he had a paci so he saw it as something for babies. He would fall asleep in the car for naps and not need his paci and then we had a weekend where we were out a few nights and he'd fall asleep without it in the car then as well so he kind of just forgot about them.

[daisybuchannan]

Connor turned 2 last weekend and we took it away mon night. He only had it in the crib since around 6 months, so I figured if wasn't a big deal (he never walked around with one do I really didn't think much about it).

His pedi asked if he still had one at his 2 year appt, bc she thought it was affecting his bite. I felt terrible and we decided to go cold turkey that night. When you think about it, even if it's "only" in the crib, that adds up (for us at least) to more hours than when he's awake. 11 hrs at night, 3-4 hr nap during the day.

He cried/whined about 45 mins the first night and then sttn. Nap the next day had some crying but he eventually fell asleep. He skipped nap one day last week completely (unheard of for him), but has been fine everyday since.

I think cold turkey is the easiest long term. Tougher at first, but more effective.