Science confirms that cats suck

[ttt]

But they're so cute! 


www.vox.com/2014/10/16/6982177/the-case-against-owning-cats


For years, dog and cat owners have been bickering over the relative merits of each type of pet.

But in recent years, scientific researchers have started to weigh in — and most of their findings so far come down firmly on the side of dogs.

CATS DON'T HAVE THE SAME SORT OF EMOTIONAL ATTACHMENT TO THEIR OWNERS

Compared to dogs, scientists have found, cats don't seem to have the same sort of emotional attachment to their owners, and show genuine affection far less often than you might think. Further, they're an environmental disaster, killing literally billions of birds in the US every year — many of them from endangered species.

Most alarmingly (and as explained in this 2012 Atlantic article), there's compelling evidence that a parasite often found in cat feces can subtly change people's personalities over time, increasing rates of neuroticism, schizophrenia, and perhaps even suicide.

In other words, research is telling us that cats are selfish, unfeeling, environmentally devastating creatures. If you need to convince someone not to get a cat, here's the research you need to show them.

Your cat probably doesn't love you

Daniel Mills, a veterinary researcher at the UK's University of Lincoln, is a cat lover. You can see his cat in the photo on his faculty page on the university's website. But experiments he and colleagues have conducted at the university's Animal Behaviour Clinic suggest that cats, as a whole, do not love their owners back — at least not in the same way that dogs do.

The researchers adapted a classic child psychology experiment called "the strange situation," in which a parent slips out of a room while a baby or young child is playing and then later returns. The child's behavior upon being abandoned and reunited with the parent is observed and analyzed. This sort of thing has been also done with dogs several times (including by Mills), and the experiments have found that dogs demonstrate an attachment with their owner — compared to a stranger, the dogs become more disturbed when their owners leave, and interact with them more when they return.

By contrast, Mills' cat experiments — which are still ongoing and haven't yet been published, but were featured in a BBC special last year — haven't come to the same conclusion. On the whole, the cats seem disinterested both when their owners depart and return. "Owners invest a lot emotionally in the cat relationship," Mills told the BBC. "That doesn’t mean that the cat’s investing in the same sort of emotional relationship." At the time, he said the results were inconclusive, but at the very least, it's safe to say that they haven't yielded the same obvious results that the dog studies have.


Meanwhile, other experiments carried out by a pair of Japanese researchers have provided evidence for a fact already known to most cat owners: they can hear you calling their name, but just don't really care. As detailed in a study published last year, the researchers gathered 20 cats (one at a time) and played them recordings of three different people calling their name — two strangers, plus their owners.

Regardless of the order, the cats consistently reacted differently upon hearing their owner's voice (in terms of ear and head movement, as graded by independent raters who didn't know which voice belonged to the owner). However, none of them meowed or actually approached the speaker, as though they'd be interested in seeing the person.

Why are cats so different from dogs in this way? The researchers speculate that the difference can be explained by evolutionary history: dogs were domesticated an estimated 15,000 years ago, compared to just 9,500 years for cats. Additionally, it's believed that dogs were actively selected by humans (to guard and herd animals), whereas cats likely selected themselves, spending time near people simply to eat the rats consuming grain stores. This difference — along with the extra evolutionary time — could explain why dogs are so much more interested in responding to the human voice.

Cat lovers will probably respond here that their pets do show affection, purring and rubbing up against their legs. But there's good reason to believe that, much of the time, these sorts of behaviors that look like affection are conducted with entirely different goals in mind.

Many cats, for instance, will rub up against the leg of their owner (or another human) when the person enters a room. It's easy to construe this as a sign of affection. But many researchers interpret this as an attempt, by the cat, to spread his or her scent — as a way to mark territory. Observations of semi-feral cats show that they commonly rub up against trees or other objects in the exact same way, which allows them to deposit pheromone-containing secretions that naturally come out of their skin.

SEMI-FERAL CATS COMMONLY RUB UP AGAINST TREES AND OTHER OBJECTS TO MARK TERRITORY

Purring, in some cases, also seems to mean something different than what you imagine. As part of 2009 study, researchers at the University of Sussex recorded the purring sounds made by 10 different cats in two types of situations: when they wanted food, and when they didn't.

As it turned out, the food-related purrs were noticeably different: the otherwise low-toned noises had a spike in the 220 to 520-hertz frequency, which is similar to a baby's cry. Human study participants also rated these purrs as more urgent and less pleasant.

What may be going on, the researchers concluded, is that cats have figured out how to purr in a way that triggers humans' parenting instincts. They don't always purr this way, but they do so when they want food, because they know it'll get results.

Finally, there's some evidence, turned up by Mills, that many cats don't actually like being petted by humans at all. In a 2013 study, he and other researchers measured levels of stress hormones in cats, with the intention of figuring out whether having multiple cats in the same household is a bad idea. That didn't turn out to be true, but they did find that the cats who allowed themselves to be petted had higher stress levels afterward than the cats who disliked it so much that they simply ran away.

Cats are an environmental disaster

In the US, domestic cats are an invasive species — they originated in Asia. And research shows that, whenever they're let outside, cats' carnivorous activity has a devastating effect on wild bird and small mammal populations, even if the cats are well-fed.

Of course, dogs are likely a net negative for the environment too. There isn't as much data available, but researchers note that dogs spread diseases (such as rabies) and also prey on various species, including many types of birds, as well.

CATS KILL SOMEWHERE BETWEEN 1.4 AND 3.7 BILLION BIRDS ANNUALLY IN THE US

But in terms of raw numbers, it seems unlikely they can match the impact of cats. A study published last year found that cats kill far higher numbers of songbirds and mammals than previously thought: somewhere between 1.4 and 3.7 billion birds, and 6.9 and 20.7 billion mammals annually. Many of the mammals might be mice and rats (species that have no problem sustaining their numbers), but the prey also includes many endangered bird species.

This isn't just a symbolic problem — it's a truly significant one. The best data we have on birds killed by other sorts of threats, from the Fish and Wildlife Service, isn't great (it's a little old, and the estimates are rough), but a comparison indicates that cats kill as many birds as collisions with buildings, and kill more birds than collisions with cell phone towers, power lines, cars, and wind turbines combined.

Cat owners can do a few simple things to easily cut down on this threat. Research indicates that leaving cats inside at night, or tying a bell around their neck (so prey hear them coming) means they kill significantly fewer birds and mammals. But right now, few cat owners do this, whether because they want their pets to get the pleasure of killing, or out of sheer laziness.

Your cat might be driving you crazy

Finally, there's the weird, unsettling connection between cats, a parasite called Toxoplasma gondii, and litter boxes.

This parasite can infect pretty much any sort of animal — including humans — but it can only sexually reproduce when inside the intestines of cats. In order to get there, it's been found to alter the behavior of infected rodents, making them less fearful of predators. In other words, when T. gondii gets picked up by a mouse, it increases the chance that the mouse will get eaten by a cat, so the parasite can reproduce once again.

This may seem bizarre enough, but over the past few years, some scientists have begun to suspect that the parasites alter human behavior in a similar way. Humans often pick up T. gondii from handling cats' litter boxes (because the parasites can be found in their feces), and there's an increasing amount of evidence that the resulting long-term, latent infection can subtly change a person's personality over time.

WHEN PARASITES FOUND IN CAT LITTER INFECT HUMANS, THEY SEEM TO SUBTLY CHANGE PERSONALITY OVER TIME

Of course, we're not rodents, so the parasites aren't successful in getting us eaten by cats. But the actual consequences are just as troubling. People who have been infected have greater rates of neuroticism and schizophrenia, and have slower reflex times in lab experiments. As a result, it seems, they get into traffic accidents more often. There's evidence that they have higher rates of suicide. All this, it seems, are unintended results of the parasite's ability to alter a mouse's brain to increase the chance of predation.

Now, everyone who owns a cat doesn't get infected by T. gondii, and there are other ways of getting the parasite (like eating undercooked meat). And the infection itself doesn't seem to cause these behavioral changes in everyone — they just occur at slightly higher rates among the millions of people worldwide who are infected.

Still, if you needed one more reason not to house an animal that doesn't love you, manipulates your emotions to get food, and helps to eradicate endangered species, it's a pretty damn good one.

[ajj]

My cat loves me, damn it. I will not believe anything to the contrary. ;-)

[mrsbro]

LA LA LA

My cats love me. They sleep in my bed and cuddle next to me.

LA LA LA

[Deleted]

[Deleted]

Casanova is seriously codependent. If I'm home, he's all up in my shit wanting attention and snuggles.

I love my idiot.



Attachment Deleted

[wawa]

I have one cat who loves me. She loves pretty much everybody though. So maybe not so much with the love as just a weird neurosis. She is deeply needy and will follow people around the house demanding attention, immediately leap into a lap as soon as somebody sits down and demands any and all kinds of physical contact. Up to and including toddler style petting. a friend's kid ended up afraid of her because she just would.not.stop. with the rubbing and the meowing and the demanding of the pettings.

The other one....not so much. She tolerates me as the person who brings the food and rewards me with invitations to pet her when I do so. Any other humans she runs and hides. Including my husband with whom she has lived for 8 years. I have many friends who have spent entire weekends at my home and did not know I had two cats.

Cats are weird.

[ttt]

I would like a scientific inquiry into why my cat constantly hangs out around my feet then acts all surprised when I trip over him or step on his paws.

[Deleted]

[IIOY]

YOU LIE

[wawa]

Oct 16, 2014 12:10:29 GMT -5 ttt said:

I would like a scientific inquiry into why my cat constantly hangs out around my feet then acts all surprised when I trip over him or step on his paws.

I think the results of this study would imply it's because he thought you were a tree.

[ttt]

Oct 16, 2014 12:15:19 GMT -5 wawa said:

Oct 16, 2014 12:10:29 GMT -5 ttt said:

I would like a scientific inquiry into why my cat constantly hangs out around my feet then acts all surprised when I trip over him or step on his paws.

I think the results of this study would imply it's because he thought you were a tree.

And clearly not a very quick learner. 

He's not the brightest bulb, unfortunately. 

[ajj]

Oct 16, 2014 12:10:29 GMT -5 ttt said:

I would like a scientific inquiry into why my cat constantly hangs out around my feet then acts all surprised when I trip over him or step on his paws.

Omg, yes. And, she makes a horrible screeching sound if I even brush against her foot or tail when she does it. 

[Deleted]

Oct 16, 2014 12:10:29 GMT -5 ttt said:

I would like a scientific inquiry into why my cat constantly hangs out around my feet then acts all surprised when I trip over him or step on his paws.

My otherwise intelligent cat does this.  It's infuriating.

This same cat, though, likes to lay in the middle of the kitchen floor while people are in there, then gets really upset when someone steps on him.  If you step on his tail, he will hiss quite loudly.  Then, when you walk back by him later, he remembers.  He knows who stepped on his tail.  And I know this because he growls at the offender.

If you step on his feet, though, he just yells at you.  

Sadly, he lays in the floor enough that I know what I've stepped on by his reaction.  But he doesn't stop laying on the floor.

[downtoearth]

So cats not only want to appear smarter than their owners, but they actually can physically alter your brain matter over time if you clean up after them causing you to change your personality?!

This may seem bizarre enough, but over the past few years, some scientists have begun to suspect that the parasites alter human behavior in a similar way. Humans often pick up T. gondii from handling cats' litter boxes (because the parasites can be found in their feces), and there's an increasing amount of evidence that the resulting long-term, latent infection can subtly change a person's personality over time.

WHEN PARASITES FOUND IN CAT LITTER INFECT HUMANS, THEY SEEM TO SUBTLY CHANGE PERSONALITY OVER TIME

Of course, we're not rodents, so the parasites aren't successful in getting us eaten by cats. But the actual consequences are just as troubling. People who have been infected have greater rates of neuroticism and schizophrenia, and have slower reflex times in lab experiments. As a result, it seems, they get into traffic accidents more often. There's evidence that they have higher rates of suicide. All this, it seems, are unintended results of the parasite's ability to alter a mouse's brain to increase the chance of predation.

I'm not a cat person, but this totally explains the old-lady with a million cats persona. Their poop has made her mentally ill.

[wawa]

Are we just telling cat stories now? Because last night cat who likes people (Black Cat, aka Bad Cat, aka Cindy Smith) stopped me dead in my tracks midsentence and then almost made me pee from laughing. I was in the kitchen with MH getting dinner together and I as walked over to the one cabinet I happened to glance down the stairs/hallway to our lower level - and there she is. Flat on her back, all four paws in the air, head tipped all the way back - just chillin' like that. Surrounded by random pieces of cat food.

Her food bowl is in the basement safe from dog and toddler. So she carried random mouthfuls of cat food upstairs, and then proceeded to lay in the midst of them like she was scrooge mcduck in a pile of money. I just stopped there and stared for a minute - and then suddenly she popped her head up and saw me, and then jumped up into instant dignified cat pose and started licking her paw like nothing happened.

I died.
CATS.

[savan]

My cats have been strictly indoors for life so they kill 0 birds (or any bugs in the house, lazy bastards) and have no parasites in their poop. They also love me forever. I refuse to believe otherwise.

[wawa]

Oct 16, 2014 12:33:37 GMT -5 mockingbird said:

Oct 16, 2014 12:27:54 GMT -5 wawa said:

Are we just telling cat stories now? Because last night cat who likes people (Black Cat, aka Bad Cat, aka Cindy Smith) stopped me dead in my tracks midsentence and then almost made me pee from laughing. I was in the kitchen with MH getting dinner together and I as walked over to the one cabinet I happened to glance down the stairs/hallway to our lower level - and there she is. Flat on her back, all four paws in the air, head tipped all the way back - just chillin' like that. Surrounded by random pieces of cat food.

Her food bowl is in the basement safe from dog and toddler. So she carried random mouthfuls of cat food upstairs, and then proceeded to lay in the midst of them like she was scrooge mcduck in a pile of money. I just stopped there and stared for a minute - and then suddenly she popped her head up and saw me, and then jumped up into instant dignified cat pose and started licking her paw like nothing happened.

I died.
CATS.

how did you not take a picture of this?

phone was in the other room!  I had just enough time to gape, for MH to look at me gaping and step around the corner to see for himself and then she noticed she had been observed and went all, "who, me? I'm a dignified kitty.  I certainly don't know what you're talking about." She didn't eat the food either. I cleaned it up like 2 hours later when I went down to do a load of laundry.

[emilyj]

Oct 16, 2014 11:51:30 GMT -5 ttt said:

Your cat probably doesn't love you

BULLSHIT.

[libbride]

Yeah, my cats don't love me. I don't need science to tell me that.

[Deleted]

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HE LOVES ME DAMN IT

[notsocreepylurker]

But but but
Cats run the internets!

[stealthmom]

Finally, science is making itself useful.

[open24hours]

My cat loves me, in his own way, even though I sometimes make him wear a chicken hat. He sleeps under the covers with me, yowls at the door after I leave, greets me at the door when I come home, jumps up on my lap when I am sitting. Sometimes I think he is part dog.

[meshaliuknits]

[IIOY]

Speaking of cats being assholes amazing creatures...

YOU SHALL NOT PASS, DOG

[ChillyMcFreeze]

My cat knows who feeds her. If that's the closest to love I'm gonna get, then I'll take it.

But what about when they willingly sit in your lap, even when the food bowl is full?? Explain that away, science!

[wawa]

Oct 16, 2014 13:02:50 GMT -5 IIOY said:

Speaking of cats being assholes...

YOU SHALL NOT PASS, DOG

Ugh, we had a stray cat that would do this to our dog at our front door when I was a kid.  Like the dog would ask to go out to pee, and you open the door and this damn cat would just be sitting there staring at him, and the dog would turn around and go back to his bed.  Like, nope, nevermind.  I don't have a bladder.

It was one of the neighboring farm's feral cat colony members trolling our place for food, and I kinda felt bad for him, but he was also an asshole to our cats and generally gross and not friendly to humans.  I was so glad when he finally stopped showing up.

(Terrible story -  they started with two unaltered cats - one male, one female FROM THE SAME GODDAMN LITTER - and ended up with over 100 inbred, perpetually snot nosed, squishy faced, mutated cats that couldn't meow right.  Some sort of kitty flu swept through the entire colony after a few years and wiped them all out.  They finally rounded up the survivors and got them all fixed.  Poor cats.  Idiot humans.)

[cville]

Whatever science. I embrace vaccinations and accept the reality of climate change. I'm rejecting you here.

[Nonny]

Dogs eat their own poop. That alone is reason enough to disregard this article and declare cats the superior animal.

[savan]

Oct 16, 2014 13:12:05 GMT -5 ChillyMcFreeze said:

My cat knows who feeds her. If that's the closest to love I'm gonna get, then I'll take it.

But what about when they willingly sit in your lap, even when the food bowl is full?? Explain that away, science!

DH says they are just taking advantage of my body heat.  I say it's love.