By Emanuella Grinberg, CNN updated 9:23 AM EDT, Wed October 29, 2014 Your video will play in 0 secs STORY HIGHLIGHTS
"10 Hours of Walking in NYC as a Woman" released by advocacy group Hollaback! Street harassment has greater impact on women, people of color, LGBTQ individuals
(CNN) -- "God bless you, mami."
"Hey baby."
"DAMN."
"You don't wanna talk?"
This is just a sampling of what one woman in jeans and a T-shirt experienced in 10 hours of walking through the streets of New York City. Her experience was filmed and edited into a 1:56 public service announcement for anti-street-harassment group Hollaback!
Inspired by the experiences of his girlfriend, shooter Rob Bliss reached out to Hollaback! to partner on the PSA highlighting the impact of street harassment. For 10 hours, he walked with a camera in his backpack in front of Shoshana B. Roberts, as she carried two microphones in her hands.
Street harassment disproportionately impacts women, people of color, LGBTQ individuals, and young people, the group says on its website: "Although the degree to which Shoshana gets harassed is shocking, the reality is that the harassment that people of color and LGBTQ individuals face is oftentimes more severe and more likely to escalate into violence."
Within hours of the video being posted to YouTube, commenters began posting threatening remarks, prompting Hollaback! to request help policing the video.
I must be really ugly or something because this never happens to me. Even when I was young and thin and cute, it rarely happened.
The only place I ever had this happen was in NYC. Walking down the street in Philly or any other city, I would get the occasional comment, but nothing like what would happen in NYC.
And as I type this, Kathie Lee and Hoda (don't judge, I'm at the gym) are going on about this video and how they miss being cat-called and women should enjoy it while it lasts.
So... I guess I don't know what constitutes street harassment, as some of those I'd see just as a "hello" type of thing. I guess I'm naive or not around this at all.
And as I type this, Kathie Lee and Hoda (don't judge, I'm at the gym) are going on about this video and how they miss being cat-called and women should enjoy it while it lasts.
I fucking hate morning TV.
They were on WWE recently. I kept waiting for someone to pound their faces to the mat.
I must be really ugly or something because this never happens to me. Even when I was young and thin and cute, it rarely happened.
The only place I ever had this happen was in NYC. Walking down the street in Philly or any other city, I would get the occasional comment, but nothing like what would happen in NYC.
It happened to me a lot growing up in Northeast Philly.
In DC and at college that would happen to me on occasion. I would just look at them like they were crazy but it was jarring. I can't imagine having to walk through that gauntlet on a daily basis. It was a deciding factor on where I applied for jobs.
I loved Jessica William's segment on the Daily Show on this.
And as I type this, Kathie Lee and Hoda (don't judge, I'm at the gym) are going on about this video and how they miss being cat-called and women should enjoy it while it lasts.
I fucking hate morning TV.
Hoda is so different when she's with Kathie Lee. Ugh.
And as I type this, Kathie Lee and Hoda (don't judge, I'm at the gym) are going on about this video and how they miss being cat-called and women should enjoy it while it lasts.
I fucking hate morning TV.
Hoda is so different when she's with Kathie Lee. Ugh.
She said something similar this morning when she and Lauer were chatting with my local NYC news people (the do a little on air turnover thing at 5 til 7, not sure if they do it in other markets). I was so irritated.
I must be really ugly or something because this never happens to me. Even when I was young and thin and cute, it rarely happened.
The only place I ever had this happen was in NYC. Walking down the street in Philly or any other city, I would get the occasional comment, but nothing like what would happen in NYC.
It happened to me a lot when I lived in Philly. (Still happens to me a lot in NY).
I live in NYC and honestly can't recall the last time I was harassed. Maybe I don't spend enough time walking around or something? But I am on the subways a lot too.
I think a lot of it depends on the neighborhoods you frequent. I tend to get harassed a lot when I'm in the 30s near the Empire State Building, the East Village & LES. And in/around Port Authority.
Not so much in central/east Midtown & the West Village.
Last week I saw a man literally chasing a woman through a subway station who was trying to get away from him (she was running). He was shouting 'What, you can't even say hi?' while coming after her.
If you don't deal with this every day, consider yourself lucky. It has nothing to do with what you look like or if you are young (I'm 40) - its just if you are a female walking alone in a city. I never experienced it until I moved to Chicago and now its an every day occurrence and it drives me insane because it is constant. The comments on sidewalks, comments from guys in cars, getting honked at as you walk down the street. Its happened when I've been out for a run and I'm all sweaty, overheated and gross - I had a guy yell in my face when I was running a month ago that he loved me. I told him to fuck off. It is not fun, it is not cute and it is not appreciated. And if I knew how to make it stop...I'd do it. I'll have to look up Jessica Williams' Daily Show piece. Maybe she has good advice.
ETA: I was in NYC for the weekend and got accosted no less than 5 times. It's obnoxious.
Although DH says I have a bitch resting face so maybe that helps thwart off the harassers.
I'm pretty certain I have resting bitch face too and blame it for the "Smile for me baby" or the "If I can make you smile it would make my day" type of comments I've gotten.
I live in NYC and honestly can't recall the last time I was harassed. Maybe I don't spend enough time walking around or something? But I am on the subways a lot too.
I think a lot of it depends on the neighborhoods you frequent. I tend to get harassed a lot when I'm in the 30s near the Empire State Building, the East Village & LES. And in/around Port Authority.
Not so much in central/east Midtown & the West Village.
I get it mostly in Midtown East and the West Village/Soho. (But I spend a lot of time in those areas.)
I can't remember it ever happening in the East Village.
I was interning in North Jersey at age 20 when someone in a car called out to me and I ignored him. Then he said something along the lines of, "You know, it's really rude to ignore someone paying you a compliment. You need to acknowledge them next time, OK?" And I actually apologized to him. I'm still ashamed of myself for that one
A few years (and many pounds) later, I was walking in NYC and about 50 feet in front of me was a very slender woman. She walked by a construction site and got all the stereotypical catcalls. I braced myself to receive the same thing when I got to that point, but got dead silence ... so not only did I feel bad that the woman in front of me was harassed, but I also felt bad about myself because the message from the construction workers was loud and clear: "We don't find you attractive at all." (ETA: I didn't feel bad because some random creepers didn't think I was good looking. I felt bad because it was a very public statement about "beauty.")
I think a lot of it depends on the neighborhoods you frequent. I tend to get harassed a lot when I'm in the 30s near the Empire State Building, the East Village & LES. And in/around Port Authority.
Not so much in central/east Midtown & the West Village.
I get it mostly in Midtown East and the West Village/Soho. (But I spend a lot of time in those areas.)
I can't remember it ever happening in the East Village.
There's a either a halfway house or some kind of men's shelter on 2nd Ave on my walk to/from the subway to work. A lot of guys who live there hang out on the street corner all day. I always get harassed when I walk by.
Although DH says I have a bitch resting face so maybe that helps thwart off the harassers.
I do think there is something to this. I have BRF to begin with and I make a point to walk in the city with a severe or angry look on my face. I also tend to have a hard-charging walk. H says I look like I'm about to beat some ass. I noticed a pretty dramatic drop-off in incidents once I made a habit of doing this.
My dad used to yell at me when I was just sitting on the couch and home and minding my own business: "You look miserable! Smile once in a while!" I had no idea what he meant, since I was usually just sitting there watching TV or reading, or just thinking about stuff.
"Hello babies. Welcome to Earth. It's hot in the summer and cold in the winter. It's round and wet and crowded. On the outside, babies, you've got a hundred years here. There's only one rule that I know of, babies-"God damn it, you've got to be kind.”
It has nothing to do with being attractive, or even if the guys are attracted to you. I'm overweight and I get it all the time, and I think that a lot of the time guys target me BECAUSE they think I must have low self esteem (especially considering I get it when I leave the house with no makeup and wrinkled clothing just to run an errand). It's about power. It's about them asserting their power over you and your body.
This was posted on Gothamist and re-posted on LAist. I follow LAist on FB and there were over 100 comments on the post last night before I went to bed. Because a lot were men saying, "What! You can't even say hi or pay a compliment to a woman in public?! I bet women would complain if guys DIDN'T pay them compliments, too! If you can't take someone saying hi to you, you should just not go out in public!" Ah, yes, street harassment is my fault for daring to walk on a public sidewalk.
I had forgotten that was what I was doing before bed last night until now. :/
I've never experienced this to such an intense degree but I've also never lived in a city where there's a lot of walking. I admit to not knowing this was a problem until recently. I get a lot of hellos and how are you doings from men while walking into stores but I've never considered that harassment. I've also gotten the you should smile lines but I just ignored it and kept walking. But these things probably happen a few times a week so it's easy to brush off.
This topic is really interesting to me but I'm having a hard time completely understanding the issue. Some of the harassment is obvious but is the movement saying that saying hello also falls under harassment? What is the solution? Teach men not to talk to women on the street or to talk to them in a different way? I hope these questions aren't Flameful, I'm trying to fully understand.
Post by tacosforlife on Oct 29, 2014 10:42:54 GMT -5
I have definitely gotten this far more in DC than any other time in my life. I've largely stopped even trying to be a friendly neighbor because the last few times I smiled or said hi to a stranger in my own damned neighborhood, I got a follow up coment.
It's funny. People in the south and Midwest talk about people on the East Coast not being as friendly. In a lot of ways, I feel like I AM less friendly since moving here. But being nice just seems to invite catcalling so fuck that, I'm sticking with rude.
I don't agree that it would happen in "any city or small town, in the US or international". I work downtown. I walk around, I bike to work, I'm out and about. I never get harassed. Well, not never, but maybe once or twice a year? It's very, very rare.
Street harassment disproportionately impacts women, people of color, LGBTQ individuals, and young people, the group says on its website: "Although the degree to which Shoshana gets harassed is shocking, the reality is that the harassment that people of color and LGBTQ individuals face is oftentimes more severe and more likely to escalate into violence
I agree with this.
It happens to me all the time and I have BRF. It doesn't deter people it just means they scream at me to smile or stop looking so angry.
Also, with as much harassment as I get as a white woman, the harassment my black friends receive happens 10x more often and is much more aggressive. I had never realized how bad it was for them until we started talking about it a few weeks ago.
I've never experienced this to such an intense degree but I've also never lived in a city where there's a lot of walking. I admit to not knowing this was a problem until recently. I get a lot of hellos and how are you doings from men while walking into stores but I've never considered that harassment. I've also gotten the you should smile lines but I just ignored it and kept walking. But these things probably happen a few times a week so it's easy to brush off.
This topic is really interesting to me but I'm having a hard time completely understanding the issue. Some of the harassment is obvious but is the movement saying that saying hello also falls under harassment? What is the solution? Teach men not to talk to women on the street or to talk to them in a different way? I hope these questions aren't Flameful, I'm trying to fully understand.
I don't have an issue with hello. It is the tone or additional commentary. It is uncomfortable because they expect you to somehow be pleased at their comments and I am frequently chastised for not showing appreciation at the attention which was unwanted in the first place.
I've never experienced this to such an intense degree but I've also never lived in a city where there's a lot of walking. I admit to not knowing this was a problem until recently. I get a lot of hellos and how are you doings from men while walking into stores but I've never considered that harassment. I've also gotten the you should smile lines but I just ignored it and kept walking. But these things probably happen a few times a week so it's easy to brush off.
This topic is really interesting to me but I'm having a hard time completely understanding the issue. Some of the harassment is obvious but is the movement saying that saying hello also falls under harassment? What is the solution? Teach men not to talk to women on the street or to talk to them in a different way? I hope these questions aren't Flameful, I'm trying to fully understand.
Yes.
I'm not trying to come off like, "Don't you DARE attempt to talk to me in public!" But if a guy says hi to you, specifically, on a sidewalk, what are his motivations? What would he say next if you stopped to talk to him?
Specifically, I'm assuming this is on a sidewalk, in a city with a lot of people, and a man you will most likely never see again in your life. Not a small town or village where everyone says hi to everyone as they pass on the sidewalk. In NYC, I would find it impossible to say hi to everyone I passed on the sidewalk, and the culture is such that it would be fucking weird, too. If you were standing there saying hi to everyone on a city sidewalk, I would assume you were mentally disabled, literally. Do the guys who claim to be nice by saying hi to women also say hi to other men on the sidewalk with the same frequency? Would they say hi to me if I was walking with another man? What makes them choose the people they smile and say hi to?
As I'm walking to my office from the train, passing dozens of people on the way, there's literally no reason to stop and talk to any of them, unless I drop something from my bag or my skirt is caught in my underwear or something. I don't find that rude - I'll certainly smile and say hi to someone if we are, say, sharing an elevator, or maybe even stuck in line together somewhere - it's more a matter of time management.
Maybe I'm really sensitive, but yeah. I think saying "Hi, how are you?" has an ulterior motive, unless it's someone you are at least vaguely familiar with. It's probably not to have you suck his dick, it's more like a machismo thing. It's a subconscious way to exert control, as they are influencing me. I have to react- either I hear it and ignore it, or I respond with a weak smile, but they are at least forcing me to make some kind of decision.
Since we've now established for the umpteenth time on this board that anecdotes are worth shit, I will share one.
One day while walking to work in Center City on a warm day, a homeless guy asked me to marry him. He said this half a second after I passed him, rather than as I approached.
I got to work and discovered that my sheath dress had split right up the middle back seam and my ass was hanging out for all to see, which explains why things felt rather cool back there, and probably explains why homeless guy wanted to marry me. Womp womp.
To this day I am thankful I walked to work super early, when very few people were up and about. Except the homeless guy. We'll always have Sansom Street.
Thank you @songforyou, cookiemdough, and msmerymac for explaining more. I completely get the motivation part of it and I see why it would be unwanted, especially, if it's happening constantly. I grew up and now live in areas where it's commonly to speak on the streets and similar to SFY, Black people definitely acknowledge each other in passing, so a simple hello is common from both sexes. But there are definitely the Hellos that have underlying meanings.
I'm eager to talk to my guy friends about this because I don't think it's something they've ever thought about. They are definitely not the chase you down and cuss you out types but I'm sure they're guilty of telling women to smile and giving unsolicited compliments. Maybe having discussions in our small circles can help change some behaviors.